Cerulean's Maintenance Diary - 20 wks of SSing - Maintaining since 25/07/11

[Cerulean]

The way ahead...and how long has this been going on?

I had a big big big think, about everything I didn't do right last time coming out of LL Rout to Management. I was quite unfit at the end. Around the weight I am now in abstinence, I was walking and cycling a lot, but that really wore down as I grew a bit weaker at the end. SO not only did I have no body wieght to fling around, but I was physically much weaker than I am at 13stone. I may have been 9st 13, but I couldn't run for longer than 10 mins.

I am wayyyyy fitter now and genuinely enjoy endurance and stamina work - so I want to keep that up all the way to the bottom this time!

Another thing is I think, for me I didn't eat for too long - this was the year that LL introduced Milk Week and our group just didn't bother - my hair fell out and my periods stopped for the first time in my life. 30 weeks of abstinence was too much for me. And suddenly being so skinny was a shock for me when I hadn't been that weight since I was 17.

So, I have decided to do my week 13 810 as one should, see how I feel on that, then go straight back into SSing for a further 6 weeks until I am 12 stone. At which point I will do another 810 week. I will spend 4 weeks there and then step up in 2 week chunks. As long as I maintain my walking and exercise and don't lose the plot, Over the 10 weeks of stepping I should get to 10st 7 or so and be refed AND fit, so I don;t feel like I'm in possession of a weird body that is not mine and is all feeble when I try to manage my weight with exercise.

Also by the time I am there I should know if I have a marathon place or not...and then the REALLY hard work begins!

That is my plan. I'm a big planner me. And I'm very stubborn....I have size 8 jeans calling me...they're only 3 months away (I got into them at 10st 10) COME ON!

 

[Lily]

Just for easy reference... (I posted to your other thread too )

810 list

3 Cambridge meal products

340ml skimmed milk or 195g fat free plain yoghurt

1 protein option (though you can mix and match, e.g., half of the cottage cheese and half of the chicken)

1 Vegetable option (or mix and match as for the protein)
======

Protein Options

250g plain cottage cheese (less than 5% fat)
325g reduced fat cottage cheese (less than 2% fat)
245g chicken/turkey breast without skin/fat
275g white fish fillet, eg cod, haddock
260g canned tuna* in water (drained)
190g fresh tuna steak*
275g quorn pieces/mince (V)
250g prawns
2 large eggs (V)
350g steamed tofu (V)
80g dried weight red lentils
225g canned chick peas, drained
70g dried weight soya beans
80g dried weight chick peas

Vegetable options

3 tablespoons in total of any of the following:

Green salad leaves such as rocket, lambs lettuce, watercress, radicchio, little gem or romaine lettuces
Celery, cucumber or red radishes
Courgettes, marrow
Brussels sprouts,
Kale, turnip tops (the green leafy part not the actual turnip) broccoli, cauliflower or any cabbage including pickled)
Chinese leafy greens such as pok choi or Chinese cabbage
Spring onions, green peppers, spinach, asparagus, fennel and celeriac
Mushrooms, Leeks.

Remember - No oil to fry (steam or poach). Don't add salt, but herbs, pepper, balsamic or lemon juice are ok. Use fat free salad dressings.



Enjoy!!!!

 

[Cerulean]

Ah Lily - you are wise - in my diary is a clever place to put it! No on can delete it and it's somewhere I look every day!

 

[Cerulean]

So - 4 years ago, yeah...this was Lighter Life...

http://www.minimins.com/lighter-lif...10-stone-8-stone-lost-7-months-gold-star.html

So a long time a go on a galaxy far far away, this was me...I am a size bigger and a stone heavier than I am in the blue dress and about 10lbs heavier than the black and white swirly dress - my first size 14 dress in 15 years at that point, I think (but dress sizes dropped a lot between the early 90s and the late 00s)...I think that blue dress does up when I get to the top end of 'overweight' which is about 3 weeks away. The black and white dress was only a tenner so it didn't last the summer and anyway that pattern is pretty out of fashion now. But the blue one is Karen Millen so it's still there, waiting in my wardrobe for a hot sunny day in a few weeks time!

So, I did it once, and I did it bloody well...and then I got it wrong so I had to do it again. And it's working - it's been easier because I look at these pictures and know exactly what I will look like in 3 weeks, 3 months, if I put it all back on again!

I'm loath to drag my pictures up again ever since I found my fizzog being the face of Romanian (I think) and Turkish diet products (I have no idea what the text said - but I believe a similar thing happens to the smashing Shauna of dietgirl.org so I'm in good company)

 

[Cerulean]

Eight times 10 is EIGHTY! (The magic disappearing cellulite day!)

Which is quite some going. It does mean that I have done about A year and two weeks of totally abstinent days since January 2007 which is a bit weird to think about! But that's another part of this journey, I guess - ha - get me, 'being on a journey' what do I think this is? X Factor or Masterchef of something like that? - anyway - yeah - this time round I have to acknowledge that I have spent a quarter of the last 4 years not eating, another quarter getting the balance right and the other half just eating my way back to where I almost was in the first place.

When I started this time round I was worried about my long term health - also I had aged so much and I had real jowls for the first time ever. I am also worried about what all this binge/purge mentality will do for me over the next 60 years of my life. We're all living longer, and I'd like my old lady years to be as healthy as they can be!

That's the sort of goal I need, not the pretty dresses (although believe me they help and that size 8 Vivienne Westwood dress I bought in 2007 is still calling me - must go and pick it up soon) even now - today - it's a bit grey and I suppose I should be having a go at my Davina (apparently my copy of 30 day Shred is arriving 2 weeks earlier than expected) but I'm just sitting here with my green tea, learning my lines and practising my audiobook reading and looking at the window going 'it looks rubbish out there, and I have tidying to do first before Davina' even when I tried to persuade myself to go for a swim and a sauna I still went 'meh - it's grey and it will make me tired and I won't get anything done'.

But I've already learned a scene and done a bit of the tidying up...so...why is my lazy bones head giving me such a hard time? Daft, innit...

In theory my week 13 810 week starts on Thursday, but I think I will start from Weigh-In day - ie - my first meal after weigh-in - I have worked out how to make a tiny fish pie from the ingredients but I'm not gonna - I'm probably going to have plain and simple but a bit special asparagus dippy egg (it's in Nigella Bites, I think). Boiled eggs with asparagus soldiers...perfect for this time of year!

So it comes to about 50lbs in 80 days and I think I'm an inch or so away all over from being a proper 16.

Eventually, I changed my bedding, had a bit of a tidy, learned even more lines, charged up my Wii Fit, got on it - hahaha - all good, it had been 418 days since I had been on it (roughly when I last stopped CD!) but Mr Bossy Boots Wii Fit was chuffed to bits with me for losing 1st since I last went on it (which actually hit some goal or other - hahaha!) I did 30 mins on that - to be honest the Wii Fit isn't hardcore enough for me so I'd given it up for dancing and fitness DVDs...but it was nice to have some words of encouragement from a piece of Japanese plastic!

And then somehow I managed to haul my sorry arse to the gym and back (a 3 mile walk) and despite thinking I might only do 20 minutes, I did a full mile. Then I had a lovely steam and sauna and I had my scrubby brush with me so I properly hosed and scrubbed myself down and conditioned my hair with my favourite stuff from Lush - so there you go - even if I do fall asleep now it will be in clean bedding with all my cups washed and lots of exercise done.

One of the reasons I choose this over any other diet is the amount of time it gives you back at weekends. My house and life had got into complete disarray until I started this again...the lack of booze and food shopping and cooking and meals out mean I have hours back. I'm not sure I'm looking forward to having them taken away again! I love this phase of the diet!

Also - er - where did my cellulite go? It's magic - I had such dreadful cellulite above my knees (never had it like that before - one of the reasons I bit the bullet and came back) and now I just have the usual scattering around my bum.

 

[Cerulean]

Day 81

I was in bed at 9 last night and probably asleep by 10.30. Get me, the former party animal! I had a lovely sleep, apart from someone beeping a horn at 5.30. I honestly think if you get caught doing that you should have your horn disconnected. Or someone should come and randomly wake you up at 4 in the morning.

Today I woke up and had my breakfast, not even putting two teabags in my breakfast cupper made a blind bit of diffence. Twinings Lapsang Souchon is rubbish. (I know it tastes of bonfires and smoked fish, let it go!)

I've just been to the gym and done another mile in the pool and had a good old scrub and sauna and steam and my legs feel really silky after two days of pampering - wish I could do this every day...I guess I could if I wnet to the gym every day! Then I walked back and had a look at teas in Waitrose... as I said above, my Twinings Lapsang Souchon isn't very good - so I was looking at getting a different brand/better quality one as I like the smoky flavour with my morning bars. Might get some decent Assam which tastes malty (but the good stuff in one serving silk sachets is £7.50 for about 25 cups...but if you way it up that's still wayyyy cheaper than buying tea out and it means I can have posh tea at rehearsals rather than just water. I'm a huge fan of Tea Pig teas - I can't wait to try the chamomile when I'm on 1000 as you can see the tiny flowers. I guess I could have risked it as it's all pure stuff and unsweetened and I probably inhale more pollen on a daily basis than there would be in those teas - but other than Coke Zero (and Tabasco - look - it worked on Lighter Life so I've always been confused as to why CD don't allow it) I stick to the plan, so stick to the plan, I shall. There was a lovely looking jasmine one too. Again - that's for later cos of the flowers (although I have never worked out the Earl Grey thing - it's got bloody citrus oil in! how is that any more allowed than floral teas?! I swear they make some of this stuff up!) It's rather nice becoming a tea connosieur. I was all about the coffee on Lighter Life - this time it's totally teattastic! You can find interesting things to try even on a restricted diet!

I'm off to rehearsal in a bit - a 4 hours rehearsal - I suspect we might only be for the first 3 hours as two actors in a different scene are also called. I think I'll walk cos it's just under 3 miles and there's no bus that goes straight there from my house so I'd end up walking from King's Cross anyway - just had my soup....going to do a bit more line learning with a cup of tea.

But yeah - I'm all about the exfoliating and saunas at the moment - my skin is AMAZING!

I FORGOT TO SAY THE MOST IMPORTANT THING! I had a really tight size 16 dress back in 2008, I haven't worn it since. It fits beautifully now - so I have a new sexy work dress! I'll have to sew down the back split for office wear as it's at foo foo height at the moment! And it needs rehemming - but yay - my 14-16 wardrobe is finally OPEN! Also, I feel slim. I know that's a bit crazy to say at 13 1/2 stone - some people are starting at that weight - but I'm really bouncy and I have hip bones and I feel 'right'. Can't believe I'm at this stage in 12 weeks from borderline morbidly obese. Incredible!

 

[Cerulean]

Walked to rehearsal - so I walked a good 6 miles today. So many roses out - don't remember ever having seen this many on the streets of grimy and not so grimy Islington - I walked through Barnsbury whcih is where Tony Blair used to live. It still smells of sewage. It's a lovely bit of my home borough but the prettiest streest always smell of poo for some reason. Got to rehearsal 30 mins early - we rehearse in a street full of famous restaurants and gorgeous bars and I spotted 3 of the cast finishing up brunch and slurping down Bloody Marys. I had a gorgeous double espresso - one of those really nutty rich ones that take coffee to the level it is supposed to be served at. I'm such a beverage nerd!

We rehearsed hard for 4 hours and did some good work. I went to hang with the cast in a nice bar for a bit and ended up staying for 2.5 hours watching other people drink wine. They asked how serious I was about not drinking I said - very - I need to lose weight! but you know what - I was happy to just sit and listen and join in and I didn't need the drink.

I dunno - it would be nice to have a drink with them particularly as I may never get to work with this director again - but then - it's just stuff in a glass, isn't it?

It's odd at the moment, I feel so comparatively skinny - my waist has started disappearing (as in there is less of it rather than I've gone apple-shaped), but my bum and thighs and tummy haven't caught up.

I still don't feel compelled to eat or like I'm missing out on anything. I wait with bated breath for Tuesday night and my asparagus dippy eggs!

 

[Cerulean]

Day 82 - the supermarket trip

I decided to make the most of the early morning bank holiday supermarket quiet hour...and I bought...2 cucumbers, spring onions, 0% yoghurt, a mint plant, a parsley plant, 6 large eggs and 2 pints of skimmed milk. Guess what week it is tomorrow! Yeah! 810! They didn't have any decent cottage cheese in Morrisons - it was really weird - it was all spooky looking stuff in yellow tubs - I like that Longley Farm reduced fat stuff - but there was no sign of it.

So tomorrow night after weigh in I'm going to have 2 eggs and some sort of dip with celery. I'll keep two of my packs for afterwards so if I get the post eating munchies, I have plenty to 'eat' until bedtime!

I pretty much have rehearsals off now until the second week of June...which is just as well as work will be very busy for the next two weeks. It's nice when life works out like that.

 

[Cerulean]

My first 810 meal

I had a dip made of about 90g 0% Fage with tiny chopped cucumber, fresh mint, parsley, a little spring onion and celery sticks to dip in. Then two large eggs made into a light omelette with a little sprinkling of spring onion and cracked black pepper.

It was absolutely delicious and now I feel pleasantly full of light nutritious food. I even found an 810 (and even SS+) friendly canape recipe! You slice cucumber and put a square of omelette on top with a leaf of mint to garnish! That's about all you get, but the luxury and the simplicity!!

My Jillian Michaels DVD arrived today...am I brave enough to try it? I will watch it through and have a think

 

[Cerulean]

Yup - I watched the Jillian Michaels DVD...didn't do it mind I live in a loft conversion with a suspended floor that runs through 4 flats - any movemement on my mezzanine area (which is also where my living room is) shakes through at least next door and the flat beyond so I'm dreading the jumping jacks! But yeah - level one looks do-able - sort of like a much faster and more bouncy Body Pump routine. I should probably also pick up an exercise mat.

Feel good for my meal last night but not terribly bothered by eating. Haven't had a gain which I thought I might - so I've set my mind at rest. I've been thinking about having a grilled chicken wrap in a lettuce leaf at the weekend or a kind of dhal or gobi aloo but not obsessing about it! No - really...

 

[Cerulean]

Tonight's dinner (Day 2 810)

A small plaice fillet (about 100g) and 150g posh prawns 6 asparagus tips (about 45g), tiny cucumber dice in 0% Fage with chopped parsley. Not quiiiite so full as last night - but definitely actually full.

I am soaking chickpeas tonight to make a chickpea and spinach dhal type thing for tomorrow so it's not all luxury prawns!

Oooh - and I walked into work - only had a bar all day (6.30am) and didn't feel hungry all day - except maybeee a tiny bit as I walked home from Waitrose with my bargain plaice haul!

 

[Cerulean]

Day 3 of Week 13 (810 week)

An iiiinteresting day…tonight I am popping up to my gran's on the train so see her for a couple of hours. Despite having given her clear instructions that I don't want food and that she isn't to fuss or do anything (she's very frail at the moment) I'm hoping I'll get away with it without causing any offence of panic. I shall just say that I had an M&S salad on the train and that I'm not hungry - I'm only there for an hour. The worst that could happen is that I have some soup to be polite or something…there's always soup at gran's. Which reminds me, I have forgotten to have my soup pack which means when I get home at 11, I'll have 2 packs to get down me. Hmmmm.

Today I ate my chickpea thingy - I forgot about the spinach and decided to have it at work so it was chickpeas, spring onion, cucumber, mint, baharat spice mix and smoked paprika and a bit of yog. It was the regulation portion size but woah it was a lot of food. I had to eat it in 3 small batches over a few hours!

As I'm off to granny's I am wearing a nice long lavender coloured tube dress (with regulation magic knickers from M&S underneath). I have had so many people going 'wow' today and asking me how I've done it and one lady colleague saying 'You have a cracking figure!' - I'm feelin' pretty good ladies, I can tell you!

So - yeah - 3 days of introducting food to the mix and no sign that it's causing any major difficulties…or cravings. I wondered if the carbier tasting chickpeas might set me off, but nah - nada. Just goes to show what a less stressed approach to all this can do for you. I'm really not that worried about food, or paranoid I'm getting it a bit wrong or freaking out if there's a lemon in the room…

My weight is staying absolutely the same, which given that I am eating about a 1lb of food a day and drinking more fluid than previously is fine by me - the important thing is that introducing the food hasn't made the scales swing upwards which was what terrified me first time round. SO - here's to the second half of my 810 week. I'm enjoying it - but blimey - isn’t washing up and queuing in supermarkets tedious and boring! I want my simple foodpack lifestyle back!

 

[Cerulean]

Hahaha - Day 1 30 day Shred - Day 4 810

Got through yesterday okay (A slight diversion for the first time but vaguely kept to 810 rules and certainly stayed under the calories - I don't like talking about anything off plan as I am now an acknowledge and move on kinda gal rather than an ARGGGH! I did it a bit WRONG!!! SCOTCH EGG BINGETIME*) - no weight change this morning which is all good.

In more important funtime news I DID LEVEL ONE OF JILLIAN MICHAELS' 30 DAY SHRED!!!! AND I DIDN'T DIE! I woosed out for about 4 5 second intervals and only did lady press-ups but I managed everything and I am alive - my upper arms feel - odd - sort of jellylike and as if they may fall off tomorrow...but I'm off for an evening walk to try to sort that out. If I end up walking like a rusty robot, you know who to blame - I'm lookin' at you Ms. Michaels. I am very red in the face...but hey - I'm fitter than I thought I was...it's alllllll gooooooood.

*There was no Scotch Egg Bingetime, I just had to swap my packs for some more 810 food, is all, before you get the wrong idea

 

[Cerulean]

Day 4 810 food

Ooopsie - forgot this bit! Yeah - I went back to omelettish eggs, cucumber and mint dip and asparagus. Yeah - I'm eating about 30 cals more veg than I should but I'm not getting hungry so I assume I'm still in the big K. Supercrazywowfuntimes. I like 810. If only someone else would do the washing up!

 

[JeFeDe]

Hear, hear on the washing up

 

[Cerulean]

Day 87, Day 5 of compulsory 810, Day 2 of 30 Day Shred

It is difficult to type this for although I am not stiff, I have done the 30 day shred in the last half hour and for a couple of hours afterwards my arms feel a bit jellyish.

I need to make a quick note of my stats - I am 42.8% body fat and 23.8% muscle (I started at 18% muscle 12 weeks ago so - er - I have put on a 1lb of muscle and lost about 43lbs in fat and a mystery 8lbs of the spooky substance *something else* So anyone who tells you a VLCD makes you lose muscle is wrongiddy wrong wrong. Okay so I do a lot of low impact stamina work but some weeks I'm well lazy as well so you don't need to go mega mental or anything. Until the shred I hadn't done any impact cardio - which I am doing on an experimental basis and it's only 3 x 2minute bursts so I can get behind that - I've done Body Pump on LL and LL had no problem with that and KeelieWheelieBin was a BP Queen and had awesome losses back in 2007 and I don't see that level 1 of the Shred is any more demanding than an hour long BP class.

810 has been an eye opener - it's made me really relaxed and calm. Even though the scales won't budge for a while - TOTM combined with warm weather I guess. I do have 4 years experience of using these diets and quite importantly I know what failure looks like! (a SCOTCH EGG followed by denial, usually) and I also have some professional psychology and acting training which means I'm pretty in tune with when my body is injured, plain tired, playing up or actually ill because I have to be.

I also think I have a pretty good idea about what parts of VLCD diets are there to make a profit, what parts work brilliantly, where they fail. I get so frustrated hearing people talk about their counsellors getting the facts dangerously wrong or not being supportive.

I've been seriously thinking about being a counsellor. Not a Cambridge one. No. Besides, I rent so I can't run a business from my flat. But a weight loss and maintenance counsellor (extra incentive for me to get maintaining right this time!) - no gimmicks...maybe working in conjunction with a CDC counsellor as one solution...giving additional support to long term losers - it's a thought. I shall think on.

So this 810 lark - I usually wake up and have to have a bar and a cup of tea to get going. I got up, spoke to my mum for 20 mins, dragged my arse into my trainers and my gym gear, shredded, (can't get into the abs - my floor is wayyy too hard - it hurt even being on a rug - hmm) Also my knees slide about in my gym pants I don't really want bare knees on the floor even for the sake of friction...then I had a bath to soothe my aching muscles - then make my tea and bar. I've bought some loose leaf Assam. Very nice - good malty kick - tastes of proper tea. 8/10

I'm going to walk down to the Union Chapel for a free lunchtime indie music concert then come home and have some lunch and go for a swim and maybe buy some new trainers - then I've been comped into a comedy benefit with some famous comedians at the Bloomsbury. A nice free day (apart from the trainers!)

I'm getting on so well with 810 - not in a 'I can;t go back into SS' way - n - I'm rather looking forward to SS again.

So the little off plan moment on Thurs night? What I used to do was use any slight deviation as an excuse to go and eat and come off the wagon. The thought crossed my mind like a flash like the old days and immediately without prompting my brain went 'but I'm not hungry...why would I want to do that?' My chatterbox went 'Er - woah! You have a point' and immediately shut up. That has NEVER happened before. This is new. I am hopeful!

 

[Cerulean]

Phew - today has been action-packed! There was shredding - all good, despite feeling like I'm not engaging my abs as much as I should - I'm not one of life's crunchers - they still screamed at me for hours after the shredding was over

Then I walked down to Islington to listen to amazing music and discovered a brilliant unsigned band who were juuuuust joyful. I bought their EP. Then I walked back and topped up my Oyster Card at my local tube station...and rememberedthat there's a new s****y runners shop in the railway arches. So I popped in (it used to be a trashy sports seconds shop that sold gold Nikes and hoodies) now it's the real deal. I had a peek and saw that they had all my usual favourites so I loitered and got some help. The lady knew her stuff...and we found a pair of shoes that passed the 'ahhhhhh' test - much lighter and less bulky than my good old stability Brooks but wide fitting with room for manoeuvre. AND they have a 30 day no questions asked return policy regardless of wear and tear.

Whilst I was on a roll I popped into Marksies and nabbed me a new sports bra and got a size 14 tummy and boob control swimsuit in blue tones. (My 16 just doesn't do anything for me any more as its too loose around my hips and boobs).

So a lot of shopping - but all for practical things. And this now means that I can start running again - I fit back into my Ronhill shorts and vest. I came home had had a small half meal of 100g pouting fillet (I'm all about sustainable fish - I won't eat tuna or cod regardless of what provenance it has - they are both over-fished and pouting is really tasty and asparagus - I had 50g dried weight of chickpeas cooked in Indian spices with a couple of spoons of spinach, a spoon of 0% Fage and a bit of spring onion) I got the real guilts about splitting my meals (but I don't really like drinking the milk or eating that much yoghurt so I figured a spot of white fish and a bit more green veg was how to get some calcium and iron and fat and protein), but a bit of calorie counting set my mind at rest, and I had at least 500cals of exercise today. I'm chilled about it, yeah.

Also, I went to see Stuart Lee headlining a comedy benefit - v lovely night, just drank water and chatted and laughed. A late night and my neighbourhood seems to be in party mode...lots of people still having barbecues into the night....it's been a lovely sunny day.

 

[Cerulean]

Er - my last post was censored for profanity!!! I didn't swear, honest! It said sw.anky - but now it looks like I said it was sh*tty or something! Unfair! I never swear on here I always say 'bloomin' or 'blimmin' I resent being made to look like a pottymouth! :flirt2:

 

[Cerulean]

Day 6 of Week 13 compulsory 810 Day er - 88 Day 3 of 30 Day Shred

Hiya - did my third day of The Shred - it was harder today (go figure) I suspect this is because my abs are finally stiff from being worked and it meant that my body ached as I did my jumping jacks. In effect though, once I'm through the first circuit I'm sorted until the last strength set and the blimmin' bicycle crunches. I just don't have the lower ab strength to do them properly yet. It'll come - but yeuuuuch. I did two full push ups today and then switched to modified - I can feel it coming and I'm going to have to work harder at perfecting that form as I'm going to need those muscles for all the plank work in the next levels.

Feels good though - and it is mercifully brief!

Had my bar for brekker, had a few cups of lovely assam tea (oooh it's a lovely cuppa) a few large glasses of water and I feel pleasantly wiped from exercise. Off to gently walk, swim and steam it off at the gym now. I have my new size 14 swimming cossie to try out and am quite excited

If I disappear from updating here, I haven't fallen off the wagon - I think I'm going to concentrating on getting my blog a bit snazzier as this bit of the journey is about getting ready for my maintainance challenge which is now only a maximum of 12 weeks away!

 

[Cerulean]

Oh and my 16s are all v baggy on me. I am a 14!