Step 1 Sole Source Confessions of a serial CWP returner

[bettiesrevenge]

Haha...indeed. I've punched out my cards again.

Been in A&E since 2pm. dH has only had bloods done. Yes writhing with pain and has had no pain relief. The NHS is officially broken in my world. Especially when all the doctors just seem to be hanging around laughing talking about holidays in Jamaica. It's a disgrace.

 

[Lily]

Haha...indeed. I've punched out my cards again.

Been in A&E since 2pm. dH has only had bloods done. Yes writhing with pain and has had no pain relief. The NHS is officially broken in my world. Especially when all the doctors just seem to be hanging around laughing talking about holidays in Jamaica. It's a disgrace.

Oh Nat, I'm sorry. I've only just read what you wrote on Kira's thread. It's wrong, but screaming is about the only thing that works when staff are ignoring you. Politely waiting for someone to notice you're in pain just won't work in today's cash-strapped NHS. It's a pity you can't scream on his behalf.

What a way to spend a Saturday. :hug99:

 

[bettiesrevenge]

This is just so typical. Every single time I have tried to restart my journey to normal weight dome. Something always seems to happen. Or more specifically when I look back it has been a cocophany of work and DH chronic health issues. I'm just apapleptic. Since he now has 2 potentially life threatening genetic dissorders, which slats will need to be screened for fairly soon. Familial mediterainian feaver and brugada syndrome are a mix not be be trifeled with. Especially since brugada attacks are triggered by fever. Which he had today at a lovely 40.1... Took me marching up to the desk at near breaking point with tears rolling down my cheeks shouting...enough...who is in charge here????, before someone finnaly did something..I can't even get private medical for him now as most people, including bupa won't cover him...cost me a fortune to get him travel insurance for our trip to Switzerland...he doesn't even have any life insurance as the premiums were exponential and he refused to pay it!

I go through cycles of feeling so desperately sad and so furiously angry and periods of time in the.middle where I try and forget about it.

However, since this is about my journey to being healthy, what I can say is I avoided the slabs of chocolate available in the vending machine and had my prepacked picnic toffee lighter life fast bar (can be utterly reccomended) a latte and a coke zero. Don't think the world will end because of that.

 

[bettiesrevenge]

That's Alara...not slats as autocorrect likes to think

 

[Lily]

I had a feeling Slats might be your daughter. I guess as autocorrect goes, it could've been worse...

Oh Nat, what a sh*tty day - I'm so sorry. :hug99: How are things this morning?

 

[bettiesrevenge]

Evening!

Been having a bit of a wide road today. But tomorrow will be back to semblance of normality I hope. X

 

[Lily]

And for anyone who's wondering what we're on about, this is from Day 4 of "100 Days of Weight Loss" by Linda Spangle.

You've probably heard people say that diets are bad for you and that you should "never diet again!" The problem isn't usually with diets themselves, but with the rigid, perfectionist ways we use them. If you're like most people, when you're on a diet, you try hard to follow it perfectly. Each day you strive to take in the exact number of calories, fat grams, or carbohydrates allowed by the plan. But if you slip up and eat a delicious (but forbidden) food, you figure you've blown it, so you might as well eat more. Soon you throw the entire diet out the window. This all-or-nothing approach never works because when you are off your diet, you cancel out the progress you made while you were on it.

Boundaries define your diet

Like it or not, to lose weight, you have to follow some type of system. Your plan can be quite rigid and meticulous, or as simple as deciding you'll eat less and increase your level of exercise. Instead of getting stuck on the word diet, learn to think of it as setting boundaries for your eating plan. Picture your diet program as a road or a path. You can define the boundaries of your diet road based on the number of calories, points, or other factors you choose to follow As you walk on the road each day, your goal is to stay between the sides of the road. Unlike strict or rigid diet plans, boundaries stay flexible. They provide guidelines, but at the same time they allow for common sense and good judgment. During times when you're strong and focused on your diet, you move the boundaries closer together, making the road narrower. When you take a break from your program or work on maintenance, you widen the boundaries and allow more variety in your plan. But even on a really bad day, you never eliminate the road or get off of it completely.

Set guidelines, not rules

Boundaries should give you benefits, not punishment! They should provide guidelines for you to live by, but not burden you with rules. You can define boundaries for any type of diet or weight-loss approach. Depending on your needs, you can simply adjust the edges of your plan to match where you are in life. By doing this, you'll be far more successful than if you punish yourself every time you step off the road.


It's a good read!

 

[bettiesrevenge]

It's my current bed time companion....

So in other non diet related news. Aunt flow from hell arrived today. No wonder I've been like a hen on a hot shovel.

Ive been really emotional. Feeling slightly antsy and well. Not myself.

Feel like going home and hiding under the duvet.

 

[Lily]

It's my current bed time companion....

So in other non diet related news. Aunt flow from hell arrived today. No wonder I've been like a hen on a hot shovel.

Ive been really emotional. Feeling slightly antsy and well. Not myself.

Feel like going home and hiding under the duvet.

Only if I can come with you!

 

[bettiesrevenge]

It's my current bed time companion....

So in other non diet related news. Aunt flow from hell arrived today. No wonder I've been like a hen on a hot shovel.

Ive been really emotional. Feeling slightly antsy and well. Couldn't be bothered with work today at all further compounded by the feeling of being royally shafted by the exec, whos exit planning for the contract I'm working on includes the headings bluff, blunder, bullshit and freeze out!

Frustrating beyond belief. Their communication is so poor even clients don't know they will soon have a new housing provider.

Like kira mentioned in one of her posts, we have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility which in turn makes us try and push giant balls of snot uphill!!!!

In the non eating headlines. Been better today had enough water now I'm on to green tea! Will be peeing like a hosepipe later....

Hope everyone else is ok

 

[Lily]

It's my current bed time companion....

So in other non diet related news. Aunt flow from hell arrived today. No wonder I've been like a hen on a hot shovel.

Ive been really emotional. Feeling slightly antsy and well. Couldn't be bothered with work today at all further compounded by the feeling of being royally shafted by the exec, whos exit planning for the contract I'm working on includes the headings bluff, blunder, bullshit and freeze out!

Frustrating beyond belief. Their communication is so poor even clients don't know they will soon have a new housing provider.

Like kira mentioned in one of her posts, we have an overdeveloped sense of responsibility which in turn makes us try and push giant balls of snot uphill!!!!

In the non eating headlines. Been better today had enough water now I'm on to green tea! Will be peeing like a hosepipe later....

Hope everyone else is ok

I've not been as good with water this last couple of days. Think I've just got bored of forcing it in! Must do better...

Hope today hasn't been too bad.

 

[bettiesrevenge]

I'm trying to stick to plan. Today has been ok. Water was less than exemplary but that's because I've been up and down in the car all day. Hmph!!! Appart from that I'm just going to order some new products. Running low on the pre made stuff which is a godsend. Though I have to stop inhalling them....they go way too fast and it feels like I've only thought about drinking them!!!

Aunt flo is raging too. Which is less than fresh on all fronts. Going to take a soak in the bath and listen to my slimpod I think!

How is everyone doing?

 

[Lily]

Happy Saturday, Nat How's you today? Is it sunny in Liverpool?

 

[bettiesrevenge]

Well hello ladies...

Boy I'm wiped out this week. I'm on call this weekend and typically shifts have gone down so I'm now trying to cover them. It's a farce!!!

Trying to keep my head above water while also being besieged by children who are running rampant around my dad's house as their mum gets her weave fixed down stairs.

It seemed like a good idea staying here but it's all gone so horribly wrong. Rather than flushing out the problem. It has multiplied and I am brimming with anger about my father's increasingly poor decision making. He now has a wife AND a girlfriend living under one roof. Thank God we have a fairly insular life inhabiting the top floor of the house. But it's begining to crack me right up!!!

Not least because the wife lets her friends kids run ferral around the house.

Anyway...the sun is finally out. I still feel like going completely off the rails with rage and rancour! I do seriously consider the reason I struggle with my weight is because of these very issues!

 

[bettiesrevenge]

Ohhh heck. Why is it that weekends have so many obstacles. Went to a lovely park. Ended up in a Turkish bbq restaurant. Had a nibble of some chicken and some salad so not as bad as it could have been. But still not impressed with myself!

 

[bettiesrevenge]

Evening all.

Well I've come back home and thankfully I didn't have any ice cream!!! Did have some chicken and lamb and salad though so probably not in ketosis anymore. I actually feel Vetter though. I've had a headache for days and felt so low and lacking in energy. I think it must have been a particularly venomous aunt flo this month.

Now it's over and I do feel like I'm getting more Energy.

Looked in the mirror today and I couldn't stand it. The image looking back needs help!!! I've kind of forgoten what is below my neck but its not looking too hot!

I'm really going to have to not mess about and keep moving forward!!!

 

[Lily]

All right, missus - you've been missing in action for a day or two. Are you ok? Xxx

 

[bettiesrevenge]

Hello there
Indeed I am. Just having my wig done as we speak. Gone for a ravishing copper for summer.

I've had a bit of a wobble. Serious migraine issues, so mistakenly had some contraband thinking it was triggered by ketosis. But turns out it's just plain old stress.... I've had a few bites of things I shouldnt over the weekend. And a couple of sneaky garlic mushrooms yesterday But I'm back on form today and long May it continue. I've been getting more frequent cluster headaches and migraine for a while now. I think I'm allergic to the toxic environment I work in!

Anyway. I really want to shift as much as I can in the next 2 weeks. Possibly ten pounds. But then every time I make outrageous claims like that my inner saboteur always scuppers my efforts..So I'm just going to whisper it to myself. Drink my green tea and get on with it

 

[Lily]

Hello there
Indeed I am. Just having my wig done as we speak. Gone for a ravishing copper for summer.

I've had a bit of a wobble. Serious migraine issues, so mistakenly had some contraband thinking it was triggered by ketosis. But turns out it's just plain old stress.... I've had a few bites of things I shouldnt over the weekend. And a couple of sneaky garlic mushrooms yesterday But I'm back on form today and long May it continue. I've been getting more frequent cluster headaches and migraine for a while now. I think I'm allergic to the toxic environment I work in!

Anyway. I really want to shift as much as I can in the next 2 weeks. Possibly ten pounds. But then every time I make outrageous claims like that my inner saboteur always scuppers my efforts..So I'm just going to whisper it to myself. Drink my green tea and get on with it

Hello Ravishing Coppernut

It's the weekend! How's it going? I've been a bit chicken nibbly today. Weekends are tough sometimes. :sigh: I love having a day at home but I really need some energy to do stuff. Need another stone off before that happens, I think.

Hope the migraines have bogged off xx