Diary closed! Link to new diary on last page.

Well guys, it's official. I am f**king sh*t at this. Last night ended up off plan, again. Of all things, a McDonalds!! Amongst other things.

Why can't I do this? It's just a constant cycle at the moment - one good week followed by one (or more!) dreadful one. I've really let myself down, and there's no way I can face going to my new group on Monday with a gain. Absolutely no chance.

I know some of you may not agree with this, and may try and talk me out of it, but my plan until Monday is to stick to VLC days. My scales were back up to 12st 4lb this morning, almost right back to where I started on my first week back at group. No amount of sticking to SW is going to get them back down again, not in 3 and a bit days. So this is the only way I feel I can move forwards and hopefully get the scales moving again.

Sorry that I am being such a failure at the moment. I honestly don't know what's wrong with me or why I can't stick at this. So much for a new start...


Lunch (102cals):
- Tesco Mini Carrot Snack Pack (42)
- Tesco Pineapple Fruit Pot (60)

Snack (42cals):
- Kiwi Fruit (42)

Dinner (353cals):
- 50g Wholewheat Pasta (170) with 75g Quorn Swedish Style Meatballs (88), Half a Pepper (15), Half a Red Onion (20), 100g Button Mushrooms (16) and 200g Chopped Tomatoes (44)

Total calorie intake for today = 497
 
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Aww stevie, I'm not going to tell you not to beat yourself up because believe me, I know you will no matter what anyone says. I think one of my problems is like you at my heaviest I was nearly 15 stone and now I'm down to 11.7 I've become complacent. I'm not where I want to be but I've come so far and feel kind of "normal" now so it's really hard to find the motivation to finish this. Do you think perhaps that's what it is for you? You've come so far and your head is telling you that's fine, stop now?

No words of wisdom I'm afraid. Just know that weight loss is a real struggle for some people and it always will be, no matter how much we lose. You'll find your way again x x x

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Hugs Stevie xx

I don't really have the words to say, I'm in a similar place to you at the moment (except in not already a few stone down like you) xxx
 
Aww stevie, I'm not going to tell you not to beat yourself up because believe me, I know you will no matter what anyone says. I think one of my problems is like you at my heaviest I was nearly 15 stone and now I'm down to 11.7 I've become complacent. I'm not where I want to be but I've come so far and feel kind of "normal" now so it's really hard to find the motivation to finish this. Do you think perhaps that's what it is for you? You've come so far and your head is telling you that's fine, stop now?

No words of wisdom I'm afraid. Just know that weight loss is a real struggle for some people and it always will be, no matter how much we lose. You'll find your way again x x x

Sent from my GT-I9300 using MiniMins.com mobile app

Thank you for those words, it always helps knowing that there are people out there that understand or have been in a similar situation. I really don't know what's going on with me at the moment. I am SO unhappy with my body and with my weight, yet all I seem to be doing is sabotaging myself constantly and making it worse. In my heart I want this more than anything, to get back to where I was (10st 10lb) and beyond. To finish this journey and get to target. To be happy and confident with my weight an my body. But it's like my head has other plans. One good week is in turn followed by a bad one and I just seem to end up back at square one, or even worse.

I am really hoping that a few very low calorie days are going to help, otherwise theres no way I can go to group on Monday. I lost 4.5lb this week, and so far it's looking as though I've gained 3lb of that back again! How embarrassing. I am going to see how these VLC days go, and if the scales are looking better by Monday then I will go. I am thinking that I may even allow myself until Tuesday, and then pop to my old group. But then that would knock things to pot and mean the following week would be a short one. Oh, I really don't know what to do with myself at the moment. I'm feeling totally deflated and my head is a mess. Just hoping I can stick to my guns the next few days xxx
 
Hugs Stevie xx

I don't really have the words to say, I'm in a similar place to you at the moment (except in not already a few stone down like you) xxx

Hugs straight back at you, Laura! It's such an awful place to be in and I hope that we can both pull ourselves out of it before long. Thank God we have Mini's to keep us going. Things would be a lot worse if I didn't have this place and all of the lovely friends I've made on here xx
 
Hugs straight back at you, Laura! It's such an awful place to be in and I hope that we can both pull ourselves out of it before long. Thank God we have Mini's to keep us going. Things would be a lot worse if I didn't have this place and all of the lovely friends I've made on here xx

Yep, definitely

I'd have thrown the towel in a long time ago if it wasn't for minis xx
 
Awwwwwwww don't beat yourself up about it, you're not crap at it, you have so many good days, I bet you're not doing your sticker thing are you? have a look at it & see how many good days you have, at the same time remind yourself how much you've actually lost. You'll get there, there is no rush, just take your time. I'd be inclined to go to class on Monday even if it is for a gain, you don't need to stop but going will keep you in control xx

Yep, definitely

I'd have thrown the towel in a long time ago if it wasn't for minis xx

I 'liked' this not because you'd have thrown the towel in but because of the support you offer xx
 
Hugs hun. We have all been there, you arent a failure - you are a human! We make mistakes, please dont beat yourself up lovely.

Do what works for YOU. If VLC if what you need to do for a few days, then heck - do it. :) You life, your journey hun xxx
 
If you spoke to your new C they would just say start new today. VLC isnt the SW way babe - perhaps do success express instead?? I am sure the damage is just bloating and you will be fine on Monday - 3 whole days away.

Least you came straight back here and didnt go awol like you have in the past - thats worth recognising a change babe x
 
Thanks everyone. Think half the problem is that I've never even met my new consultant, as she's been away on holidays the last couple of weeks. So I don't really have anyone like that I can go to at the minute. I text Nic, but I feel bad. Considering I left her group. It just seems a bit cheeky, you know what I mean?

I know VLC isn't at all similar to SW. But maybe that's what I need these next few days? To once again rediscover the beauty of SW.

Can't believe I have f**ked up like this in my second bloody week!!!!!!!!!
 
Take a Chance and Never Look Back...♥

Hi princess Stevie dont feel bad there is a lot if emotional stuff to this eating malarkey, it can take us a whole to get around that's. Just a suggestion but what about trying success express for the next few days? Then go to group on Monday and see what happens. I have found s express has really helped me turn it around


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Aww no :( ... I came to say hoppy Friday hun . Sorry your not feeling great Stevie. I'm sure you will be able to pull it back with a few days of VLCD . I think what a few of the others have suggested about Success Express might work also. See what works for you hun and then next week, draw a line and start fresh. Hope you have a lovely weekend :):).

Hugs Kay xx
:bighug:
 
PS, I've just sent it hun :p.

Kay xx

Thank you very much Kay, it was an interesting read! You'll see my comments in the reply :) Thanks so much for the advice, you are so supportive and thoughtful xx
 
Thank you very much Kay, it was an interesting read! You'll see my comments in the reply :) Thanks so much for the advice, you are so supportive and thoughtful xx

Aww your welcome :hug99:, always here for you PS and had to turn your Friday into a Hoppy one ! :D:D Have a fantastic weekend and keep smiling. When one door closes another one opens PS. Stay positive lovely :):).

Kay xx
 
Was getting a little hungry so had to have a kiwi fruit to keep me going. Feeling much better after that. Haven't found today particularly hard, although I think it'll get harder over the next few days. Especially as it's a weekend. But I desperately need to reign things back in again.

Will keep an eye on the scales over the next few mornings too. Was 12st 4lb this morning and was 12st 1lb at group last week. I want to get down to 12st at the very minimum, so that I still show a loss from last week!
 
Hey Stevie, just caught up on your day, You're definitely not a failure, everyone has weeks/months/years like this, so I wouldn't worry if you lose one week and gain another, you're just take a detour on the country roads like most of us do.
I've no doubt that you'll get the lb's shifted over the next few months. I think you just need to start being stricter with yourself maybe. When I'm having a naughty/bad week and we nip to mcdonalds with the OH, I go crazy and get everything that I love. But then when I'm on my focused strict week, I'll get a diet coke and get something when i get home, or eat my cheeky hifi from the bottom of my handbag.

Also, maybe to play catch up with the scales for you WI on tuesday, try being low carb, great for red days if you like them. I found loads of water, along with red days / low carb days helped me drop a lot of my bloat from naughty holiday treats. Only thing I'd watch with doing anything like low carb / low cal is when you start to eat back to extra easy style, then just slowly increase things, as I found going straight back to "normality" can cause your body to go crazy.

Hope that makes sense, and hope it helps a little, but whatever you choose to do. Just try and get your focus back. It's different for everyone. But mine always comes back when my Nan tells me my cheeks have filled out. And my mum mentions my backside. Lol.
 
Well, that's my first VLC day completed. To be honest I've not found it half as difficult as I'd imagined, so I'm pretty pleased. Have also drank about 6 litres of water today to keep me hydrated and full up! Can only hope and pray that it will make a difference to the scales. Night all x
 
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