I am going into Management tomorrow and thought today would be a good day to start the journal and put some "pre-thoughts" down! OMG am I excited to be rejoining the world of food! More importantly I am looking forward to sitting down for an evening meal with the family - my kids have really missed me sitting with them but I just can't whilst abstaining, not even drinking my soup helps! Other feelings - nervous - yes of course, it is change and all change is scary. Erm - disappointed - if I am completely honest yes I am a wee bit disappointed with myself that I didn't lose that last half stone during abstinence - I would have loved to have been down into the 10stone somethings but I know that I have achieved a lot, and a lot more than I have ever achieved in the last 15 years in terms of weight loss, but it does still niggle at me. My hopes for the future - god this is a hard one - we all worry about the future and I am hereby pledging to myself that I will follow maintenance to the very best of my ability with a couple of exceptions (Christmas parties) for the next 12 weeks. After that I am torn between wanting to get onto weight watchers to shift this last stone and needing to get weighed, or just following a low GI lifestyle for myself and the rest of the family. Most of all I hope for a "normal" life - normal being the operative word here - I want to be able to go out for a Chinese or eat an odd donut or whatever without it ruining my healthy eating regime. I want to be able to go to the biscuit tin and have one or have an odd pack of crisps here and there without it spiralling out of control. In other words I want to spend the rest of my life living my life as a "thin" person - is that achieveble? Only time will tell. I am going to update my management diary daily and use it to record my thoughts and food patterns during my journey. More as a reminder to myself than anyone else but also because I want to be "accountable" for my thoughts and actions and this is a great way of doing it.