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Had some terrible news yesterday

Roch

Minimins gal x
S: 27st2lb C: 25st2lb G: 10st0lb Loss: 2st0lb(7.37%)
#1
Yesterday afternoon my uncle rang me to tell me that the family reunion we have each year has been cancelled as my second cousin has been re admitted to hospital. My cousin hazel has been fighting with breast cancer for 2 years now and now we have been told it has spread to her brain and she has a chest infection and has no more fight left in her. Her immediate family are the only people allowed 2 be in the hospital as she is sedated and i was told that she was not expected to make it through last weeeknd but she is a fighter and she managed to stay at home and spend the wekend with her family.
We were not close but she was such a kind and caring lady always there to help others, she was my mums first cousin.

Breast cancer is something that i am very scared of and live with that fear every day as my mum died of breast cancer at the age of 36 and i was 8 then my grandma (mymums mum) died 8 years after my mum of bc as well.
I also have another second cousin who has been battling with bc for 4 years now but seems to be winning the battle.


Hazel and i were never close but she was a beautiful caring lady and although she was fighting this terrible ilness she still managed 2 organise an amazing wedding for her daughter around 6 months ago i saw the photos and it looked gorgeous and she looked so happy.

I am not sure what to do now as there is a very good chance my surgery could be scheduled for the next 2 weeks and i dont know if i should postpone things.
 
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kazbro

jelly belly
S: 20st5lb C: 18st0lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 49.2 Loss: 2st5lb(11.58%)
#2
sorry to read your news
i dont qiute know what to say
on the one hand you need your op, if you cancel you may have to wait ages for another appointment
but then if your cousin does pass away during this time will you be fit enough to go to the funeral

i`m sure she would want you to have the op
she sounds a lovely lady and it is very cruel that she is suffering



kaz xx
 

pandora

finding my way again !
G: 11st7lb
#4
don't know what the answer here is, pro's & cons each way, but just know i'm thinking about you both
xx
 
#5
Roch so sorry to hear your sad news love:(

The timing of my operation was horrible....the peadophile was due to be sentenced and we were on all pins....luckily my younger sister persuaded me to go ahead with it as she would cope with the kids and afterall I needed it to survive.....as she put it..."things turn up in life at every opportunity and there will always be a reason to postpone......when will be the right time? when you're dead" that did it for me and as you know I went ahead and it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

Good luck
 

chelle_powell

We ride, we ride....
#6
Hey hun

SO sorry about your sad news, and I'm sending u lots of love.
I think you should try and go ahead with your operation, as things like this make us realise how fragile life is and we need to grasp every living moment. And you haven't been living hun, so it's time you do something for yourself.
Hope this doesn't sound uncaring - written words are soo difficult to dechipher with no tone.

Much love, chelle xx
 

IreneH

Gold Member
#7
Sorry to hear about your sad news and know how much it feels because of your family history. Whatever decision you take will be the right one. Just put yourself first
Irene xx
 

Coley

Re-starter
S: 13st9lb C: 11st5lb G: 10st0lb BMI: 26.5 Loss: 2st4lb(16.75%)
#8
Thats no good Roch!! never very nice to have people ill.

buuuuuuuuuut, you can't do anything.

Whats the point in prosponing things? You can't go and see her and if the worst happens I'm sure your family can work around your op. As you said, she is very nice but you are not close. It's like when my friend died, he was lovely but we weren't massively close. I got upset but I didn't stop my life for it.

Do not even consider prosponing for this.
 

Mini

Administrator
Staff member
S: 18st2lb C: 16st3.5lb G: 11st2lb Loss: 1st12.5lb(10.43%)
#10
Hi Roch,

Sorry to hear your bad news.

No one can make this sort of decision for you as you are the only one who knows does it feel right.

But in life if we always wait for the right time then nothing much would get done as there is always something happening.

There is an old saying "Strike while the fire is hot"!

Love Mini xxx
 

soulsister

Silver Member
S: 20st0lb C: 19st9lb G: 12st0lb Loss: 0st5lb(1.79%)
#11
Sorry to hear your bad news Roch. Just echoing what has already been said you have to do what is best for you at this time. Remember Aaron and why you want to have the operation.

I am thinking of you girl,

xxx:hug99:
 

sonkie

Gold Member
G: 12st0lb
#12
Ditto everyone else. You must think of yourself and your son, and as you are not able to visit I think you should stick with your appointment and see what the next step is.....and when the op is likely to take place.

Hope your cousin is as comfortable as possible, my mum started with BC and it ended up in her brain too.
 

Roch

Minimins gal x
S: 27st2lb C: 25st2lb G: 10st0lb Loss: 2st0lb(7.37%)
#13
Morning, thanks so much for all your support and kind words. Sorry i have not responded individually but i m kind of having a hard time at the moment phyisically and emotionally.

I have decided to go ahead with the plans for my op and my app is today in the west end with the consultant, i really hope that i will get an op date today and i can start planning things and making arangements.

My best friend has offered to come and stay in my home with her 2 daughters so i dont have to send Aaron to stay with friends and Ebony to kennels.Ebony has been completely house trained for the last 8 weeks and she is only 5 months old now so it really only took me 4 weeks after she had her 2nd jabs for her to get used to going outside and now she cries when she needs the toilet so i am chuffed about that, no more slipping over for me LOL

Got an email from my cousin yesterday to say his mum had a good night but i am not going to go 2 the hospital and see her as its immediate family only and i dont feel like i am strong enough emotionally to cope at the moment.

Well as my sciatica is so bad today have to dose myself up big time to be able to manage the hour drive to the hospital so am off to bed to lie down and rest my back for bit.
Take care and thanks xx
 

kittykat

Gold Member
S: 29st0lb
#16
roch sorry to hear the news but good luck with the app today hun xxxxx
 

Geri

Gold Member
#17
glad to hear your cousin had a comfortable night.... Good luck with your appt today, make sure you leave in plently of time :p What time is the appt??

Oooh and Happy birthday girl :p
 


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