Hobnobsmummy's Diary

[Lexie2005]

2.5lb on this week, first gain in 11 weeks. Knew it had to happen at some point, My willpower this week has gone out the window, I want my 3 a Day Xenical back Stupid Manufacturers, I am not ready to go it alone yet, willing to admit that, because I know I cant keep myself away from the junk food with all the stress going on at the minute and the Xen was helping with that and the scare of Mr T, Yet I have eaten a Kebab and Chips and not seen Mr T this week, So 1 a day isnt working for me.

Have you rung round the smaller pharmacies in your area to check stock? It's scary & tempting without I know but just remember how well you were doing & that you can do it xx

 

[hobnobsmummy]

Have phoned about 25 of them Lex and they are all gone No alli either

 

[Lexie2005]

Have phoned about 25 of them Lex and they are all gone No alli either

I wish I knew what to say to help. For me one a day was enough cos I still thought it'd have side effects. I guess if it's not having though it'd be more tempting. I'm on my phone so can't see what you've lost up to now but I'm sure it was good & don't let this silly weight beat you. We are all here for you xx

 

[hobnobsmummy]

Thanks hun, I can see it in my clothes more than I can on the scales which is good and is still positive, but I want to get under 18 stone! I was so close and then to put this on this week now makes the Easter Challenge Goal look less likely

 

[LisaM1977]

keep going hun... I had a gain this week too... we can do this. you have come so far already... Alli is available in a few of the chemists near me if you want me to get you any.. x

 

[Lexie2005]

Thanks hun, I can see it in my clothes more than I can on the scales which is good and is still positive, but I want to get under 18 stone! I was so close and then to put this on this week now makes the Easter Challenge Goal look less likely

Try & stay positive x

 

[hobnobsmummy]

Oh I am SO annoyed at myself I could scream. Done all that walking, walked 3 miles into town and then around town for 3 hours today then had a bloody pastie.
Thats it, Tommorow I am buying an exercise bike. I dont care if we dont have any room for it, I will make room! I will dismantle a bookcase or two.
I have no junk in the cupboards or fridge, al healthy stuff. So I cant be tempted and I am not going out of the house so I cant be tempted by anything in town for conveinience (Sp?)
NEED to help myself, because the Xen isnt by just taking 1 a day Its not having the same effect on me, Im not getting Mr T when eating naughty things so nothing to stop me, as my willpower is rubbish atm.

 

[KittyBling]

Tomorrow is a new day! For me as well as you, lets get this done.

KB x

 

[LisaM1977]

You can both do this ladies.. You've come so far x

 

[Lexie2005]

I promise you can do this, you need to believe in yourself & think how amazing you will feel when you do this xx

 

[hobnobsmummy]

Thanks Ladies
Lex I know, But I have never believed in myself, I spent so much time growing up feeling inferior to others and being bullied that my confidence is non existent. It wasnt until I had my little girl that I suddenly found some Confidence in being a parent and standing up for myself and my family.
I know what I need to do, I know where I go wrong, I just have to fight against a lot of old Demons first. Comfort Eating when Stressed, Snacking through Boredom, Making excuses for not exercising enough (although I am improving on that one by walking more rather than taking the bus)
I'm trying to run before I can walk, and expecting it all to just keep dropping off and its not going to all the while I eat junk at the weekends and for conveinience when out and about.
I think the stress of trying to find a house is also getting to me, at the moment if we dont find anywhere we will be moving in with the inlaws so that the people buying here can move in! and that will stress me out so much it will make me eat my own weight in kettle crisps! lol.

 

[Mizkirsty]

Hugs !! just keep positive and tell yourself you are worth everything and you deserve nothing but the best!! X

 

[Lexie2005]

Thanks Ladies
Lex I know, But I have never believed in myself, I spent so much time growing up feeling inferior to others and being bullied that my confidence is non existent. It wasnt until I had my little girl that I suddenly found some Confidence in being a parent and standing up for myself and my family.
I know what I need to do, I know where I go wrong, I just have to fight against a lot of old Demons first. Comfort Eating when Stressed, Snacking through Boredom, Making excuses for not exercising enough (although I am improving on that one by walking more rather than taking the bus)
I'm trying to run before I can walk, and expecting it all to just keep dropping off and its not going to all the while I eat junk at the weekends and for conveinience when out and about.
I think the stress of trying to find a house is also getting to me, at the moment if we dont find anywhere we will be moving in with the inlaws so that the people buying here can move in! and that will stress me out so much it will make me eat my own weight in kettle crisps! lol.

Oh honey I know how hard it is, I had no self confidence whatsoever even when I was 9 stone but recently I have felt so much better, I wouldn't say I am confident but the weight loss is helping massively.

You are worth so much lovely & we are all here to support you xx

 

[hobnobsmummy]

So after losing the 2.5lb last week and telling myself that I CAN do this and even if I really pushed myself lose the weight for the easter Challenge..Ive screwed up over the weekend and this week so far with naughty bits and pieces that I shouldnt have had.
I am really struggling without my Xen, So I am going to Boots this week to have a look at the XLS binder tablets, Need to take something to keep me on the straight and narrow. Just hope they are in stock!
Im not ready to go it alone yet, i dont have the time or the patience or the willpower at the moment with everything else going on.
We have family issues and also we have sold our house but the one we were buying fell through and we have yet to find somewhere else, and I dont want us to lose our buyer so we may end up renting or even moving in with the inlaws and I couldnt handle that!

I can tell when I am feeling down as my dreams get very vivid and realistic, last night I had a dream that my brothers and my dad came and told me my mum had died, and I was crying in my sleep. My Mum died in 2001 yet last night I felt like it had happened all over again and I woke up so confused. Not Nice

My little girl is a bit under the weather, either that or she has suddenly taken on the "terrible twos" with a vengence! She has her moments like all children do, but when she is poorly she becomes very OCD about things and throws tantrums if she doesnt get things done in her own way.The Naughty Chair has been used a fair few times already this week and we are only on tuesday! Help.

 

[hobnobsmummy]

A Smelly STS this week but at least it is not a gain, positive side to it?

New Exercise plan for this week in place too.

Friday (Today) - 60 min Aerobics online once Littleun is in bed.
Saturday - Brisk Walk/Jog in the morning round the block whilst Hubby is at home to babysit.
Sunday - Grocery Shop (I was surprised when looking into this how many calories pushing a trolley actually burns off!)
Monday - Brisk Walking round a Local Kids Attraction (Taking Littleun out for the day with a friend to a farm park, also involves me climbing around a Soft Play no doubt)
Tuesday - 60 Min Aerobics online or on Wii Fit
Wednesday - Brisk Walk/Jog round block once littleun is in bed (Hurray for Lighter Nights)
Thursday - 60 Min Aerobics online

 

[Lexie2005]

Sorry lovely I had missed your post from 3 days ago, nightmares are horrible right, I used to dream a lot about when my son passed away & as you say when you wake up you are going through it all over again so massive hugs.

Have you got xen supplies yet? If so back to 3 a day asap, if not have a ring around, as you can see from various posts it does seem to be coming back in to stock. I know you have found it hard without to keep on the straight & narrow.

I will say it again, Amy honey you really can do this I know you can. You haven't come this far to give up now. Your exercise plan for next week looks amazing & I will be at the front of the queue to kick your ass if you don't do it xx

 

[hobnobsmummy]

So this week has been really Sh*t to be honest. Weight loss wise it has been fine, I have lost 2lb, probably through worry rather than through taking any tablets or dieting (I have no tablets left anyway)
My Brother was taken into hospital and I couldnt get to see him (we also have a complicated relationship, long story which makes things even more stressful)
My Brothers FIL had a heart attack in Mcdonalds (of all places) and died, So that was more bad news, then My uncle had a stroke and was kept in hospital for a few days but has thankfully been allowed home now.
Then I had to go for some Tests and now the Nurse/Gp think I may have Thyroid or Kidney Problems, so thursday was spent up the hospital having an ECG and Blood Tests.
Today has been a little better with it being Bank Holiday and Hubby not being in work, but our littlun is really playing up with these tantrums, proper terrible twos!! and I am finding it hard to cope with them and everything going on this week.
On a positive note we had our offer accepted on a house we like and so hopefully now that will go ahead and we can eventually move, but that has been stressful in itself, it is nearly 2 years since we started this moving house business, we are due some luck.

So not a great week at all, hopefully next one will be a lot better! Have a few things to look forward to anyway. x

 

[Mis-behave]

Wow that's a lot going on! Glad your offer was accepted and I hope all goes well with it, I'm sorry to hear about your brother's FIL and your brother and your uncle.. I hope they get better soon.. I also hope your tests come back ok!

2012 has not been so great, so far let's hope it gets better!!

Great that you are still loosing, even through the stress and emotion

 

[Lexie2005]

What a week hey honey! Sending virtual hugs your way..... Xx

 

[toofatkat]

What a week youve had. Its been a bit stressful for you but you can move forward from this.

Easter Sunday is nearly here and that's a Good time for a new positive start .

Hugs xx

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