I need opinions please!

[Blonde Logic]

Warning! Talk about food follows. Well, groceries anyway, not really food, but just in case....

What do you think is a reasonable amount to spend a week, for a healthy, varied diet? With a variety of fresh and frozen fruit and veg, etc.

Do you think it is cheaper to say, have only 1 or 2 kinds of fruit/veg a week? Though boring? Or do you mix it all up?

Based on one person, not a whole family.

Just trying to see what others thing....having quite the discussion this evening.

Sorry to mention groceries. Not quite food - but, ya know.

 

[RecoveringChocaholic]

I spend between £40-£70 a week on OH/s shopping some weeks there will be cleaning stuff needed makes you realise that LL is not so expensive
When were both eating it was around £100 most weeks

 

[pete10141748]

Agree with RC ^

Anything up to/around £70 is probably about right.
After all, £10 a day for 3 meals actually doesn't stretch too far, based on the price of most stuff these days.

Of course, if you were to buy "luxury" items or something like the Sainsbury's Taste the Difference range as opposed to their regular or even "basics" range, then it could well verge on almost double that.

Do you think it is cheaper to say, have only 1 or 2 kinds of fruit/veg a week? Though boring? Or do you mix it all up?

Having only 1 or 2 kinds of fruit is going to get boring I would think, then again depends on what you are like and what you like.
I could happily have, say, an apple each day with lunch, but I wouldn't always want a green one!

I'm know from my uni days of shopping for myself and still making an effort to have at elast *some* fruit, salad and veg that it doesn't last long..... and that just 1 shopping trip a week to "stock up" on stuff might not suffice (especially if, like me, you like your fresh stuff to be REALLY fresh)>

Guess that can make it seem like you are spending more too, as instead of spending your food budget in one shopping trip, you are making two or three a week, still only buying what you would in the 1 big trip, but it can still seem to be more to other people when you seemingly *keep* on coming in with 'more food'

Just a thought

 

[Blonde Logic]

THanks for the reply RC. My oH works shifts, so he mainly eats at work - and has 'snacks' as home, so our shopping is mainly, but not entirely for my fod during the week.

We spent 56 quid - that included catfood, some bulk items that will last yonks, and some 'stores' that won't be eaten at once, but used over a few weeks.....and he felt I've gone off the rails. He thought I was spending too much on fruits and veg because I was buying a large variety. lol, he basically thinks for fruit, I should have ALL apples, or ALL oranges, that it would be cheaper, same goes with veg. I don;t get his logic, but I've never been good with money, so maybe he's right - but I don;t think so. And I think that sounds perfectly boring, which could lead to naughty no-no's.

We are in an awful lot of debt really - from all our years travel backa nd forth to see my mom, development on our property in the states, and DIY here - its all catching up with us, so I appreciate he wants to save - but I put my foot down and said not at the cost of my diet! <sigh>

Its so frustrating. I absoultey HATE dealing with money. I hate it - brings up so many knee-jerk feelings and issues from my ex-husb. If we start talking about it - I definatly do become the Rebel Child, and I get very stubborn and almost shut down. Its because talking about it makes me nearly sick. Thats from all the old stuff.

Its just a really miserable feeling.

Anyway, he seems to think I should be able to buy a weeks healthy food for about 20-30 quid. HOW??? I just can't do it, and I buy only stuff on special, if there are specials - I only buy f&v, tiny bit of meat, tofu and yogurt. I am not buying anything extravagent, and I just don't know how to do what he wants. He has it in his head that I am making 5 pound salads, just cause there are different clours in it!! Men. pah.

ANyway, its just really frustrating.

Thanks again RC>

 

[Blonde Logic]

Thanks Pete

I only shop once aweek due to my aversion of grocery shopping. lol

He just sees it all laid out on the counter and thinks its far too much and far too expensive. I bought enough fruit for 2 peices of fruit a day!!!!! Good grief! Thats not ridiculous - so whyshould it all be the same?? I just don;t understand his logic. He has Brunette Logic. Blone Logic is much better.

I just thionk because since we got married, nearly 8 years ago, he has not shopped, he has not cooked, he has not planned meals, and his mum ain't doin it for him anymore either. I think he is just completely out of touch with what food costs these days.

It did my head in though. We were up till after midnite going round and round and round and round.

I'm so worn out from it all I called in sick today.

I realy do hate money. <sigh>

Anyway - thanks Pete!! good input.

 

[Huseyin]

Sadly eating healthy is not actually cheap as you are paying for often over marketed foods. I would have said that £66 is enough a week on groceries.

You cannot buy a healthy balanced variety of food for £20 as suggested.

Maybe trying using the PYO (pick your own) farms in the area to get a good supply of veg and fruit thats in season. that may save you a pretty penny

 

[Sean(JSF)]

You're right BL, it's impossible on the amounts your OH thinks you should spend.

Also to pick up on Pete's point, if you buy fruit & veg in smaller quantities through the week from a local shop, not only will it be fresher & tastier, but also likely to be cheaper than the supermarket.

 

[Blonde Logic]

Thanks guys.

I am really upset about all of this, because I know how hard he works -a nd is working double shifts, etc., to try and bulk up our funds. We are both nervous since Ive been made redundant. And he jut sees me as fighting against him.

I tired to explain to him that maybe he needs to not eat any food for a year to fully appreciate why it is so important for me to have a healthy, caried diet. You can't get all your vits and mins having the same kind of fruit or veg each day - you need variety.

Its just so dissappointing, to have to argu over healthy food after fighting so hard to get here.

The worst of it is, most of the debt is my fault. Well, most of the recent debt. Clothes, diet, etc. ANd I am on sh*t wages now, with no OT opps, so he has to bust his hump, and he works hard and is tired.

Oh b*ll*cks. This just really is making me feel down, trearful and I am expecting a prospective job person to call anytime now.

Poo.

I just feel like poo.:cry::cry::cry::cry::cry:

 

[Blonde Logic]

Thanks Sean - I did try the local produce place, and I think it was just as pricey as the market, but there is another in town and I have looked into PYO as you suggest H, but the one here local doesn;t have anything on at the moment but will def look there in season.

Money is just the worst thing to argu about. Ever.

Thanks guys.

x

 

[Blonde Logic]

THanks LS. He is quite snesitive about my diet needs, he just thinks I am doing it in the wrong way, and a most costly way. That is why I posted here. So I could see what others thought and share a more broad spectrum with him.

It has just made me really sad.

I do like you - I cook something that makes at least one dinner, two lunches and sometimes maybe a nother meal - or I freeze a couple to have ready for busy nites. I kept trying to get that in his head - that I am not eating EVERYTHING that we buy in one week.

His argyment is then if I am making or buying stuff that will last more then one week, why is the next weeks shop not cheaper. I tried to explain because it swings about, what you buy week to week is not always the same things.

ARGH. Its done my head in. Properly.

Thanks hon.xxxxx

He does want me happy. Its just that is is really pretty dire at the moment. And I am probably being very stubborn. But I worked f*cking hard to get to this stage, and for the first time in my life I am enjoying a healthy diet and its very upsetting having tat challeneged - and I KNOW he is not challenging it to be mean. He is challenging it because we are in trouble. Ugh. Its a mess.

x

 

[Huseyin]

BL im so sorry to hear that about the redundancy.

Just remember when one door shuts another opens, i could go on with quotes like that but it is true and i know you will be back up and running soon, Just tell your husband that if he wants what is truly best for not only you but for both then he should not dispute it. Try to talk to him again when he is rested and in a better mood.

*give BL and big hug*

 

[Blonde Logic]

Please guys too - can I just say - my OH is not an ogre. He is as unhappy about feeling the need to make those "demands" as I am....I don;t want to paint him in a bad light.

He does mean well, and he is taking ahradline to try and help undo some of the financial damage I did.

(For you newbies - I had a real wobble last summer - went a bit cray with shopping. I was laid up, signed off work for 2 weeks, taking heavy pain pills that make me do irresponsible things, and I was depressed, in pain and home alone ((his double shifts)) a lot of time, and I went mad. I was wrong. I blew it BIG time. B - I - G time. So its is my fault.

And it is a matter of having the money to do it, or not do it.

This is why I so desperately hope to get a higher paying job. I am so sick of living like this. Honestly. I really am desperatly sick of it.

 

[Blonde Logic]

Tough situation. But he needs to trust you with the fact you aren't wasting money. I remember you telling him about all the clothes you'd bought - maybe there's some overspill from that, and he's worried. As you said, he obviously doesn't know much about cooking/food etc so it's lack of knowledge on his behalf too. Does he come supermarketing with you? It may be an absolute nightmare but if you do a few trips together, he'll see you aren't wasting money. You can also show him how you have planned your food for the week - if you haven't done that already...

Thats what we did last night - we went together. And before hand I worked out a weeks meal plan. And put on the list only what was on it. TBH, I almost feel making a weeks menu made it more expensive because some days I don;t eat as much as others - you don't know in advance how hungry you will be, etc., but I filled out the plan and shopped from that and that only. As said - some items are indeed ingredients that will go on and on for a bit. Ya know?

 

[Huseyin]

Ok Lets think compromise here. He should accompany you to the supermarket as LS mentions, at the same time make a decision to buy food together, let him choose as well as you. Then you are both buying and he wont feel you are dictating what goes in his mouth or indeed as he feels wasting money on things that wont be eated by you or him.

Me and my wife do this all the time and it feels good, everyman including me feels wives waste money but that is our nature. Ok so you made a mistake before but that is all you did made a mistake, you cant continue to beat yourself over it and its not fair that you ought to be made to suffer as a result either.

Compromise go together and its ok to eat unhealthy once a week, just chew the food slowly about 20 times and have a balanced meal.

you want Pizza have a slice with salad etc.

thats Paul Mckenna's idea and it works if you do it strictly

 

[Blonde Logic]

Thanks guys. I am sorry to be such a moaner. It just gets me down.

I really appreciate your feedback and ideas. THanks ever so much.

xx

 

[Blonde Logic]

Maybe you just need to keep this up for a few weeks so he'll see nothing is going to waste.

Also, can you e-bay some of your old clothes? I'm sure you've got some that don't fit anymore...

Most everything is gone. I did keep a few things that were really nice to have altered. I could consider offing them. It wouldn't make a huge impact, but it would help. Will give that some thought.

x

 

[Blonde Logic]

<<<<<LS>>>> Thank you hon. sniff sniff.

 

[Huseyin]

Thanks guys. I am sorry to be such a moaner. It just gets me down.

I really appreciate your feedback and ideas. THanks ever so much.

xx

Yes but you are a lovely monster, if there ever was such a thing lol.

Im kidding you are more then welcome i second what LS said

 

[roundrachel]

Hi BL. I'm having the same kind of issues. Having gone from a strict £66 a week budget it's really hard to manage just what you can spend on food.

I now have a fruit, veg and salad box delivered every week from a local farm. They basically give you a bit of everything that's in season at the moment. It costs me £30 a week but I get loads. You never know what you're going to get but it means I can be a bit creative! Plus I'm supporting local business and I know it's all fresh and environmentally friendly as it hasn't been flown half way accross the world.

If you google 'organic veg box delivery' or something similar I'm sure there'll be somewhere near you that does it. I've got friends all over the country that do it and they all think it's loads cheaper AND better quality than going to the shops.

I get mostly get my protein stuff from Aldi these days. Although I'd rather eat fresh, they do some good deals on frozen fish etc. My local butcher does some good deals too.

When I first started RTM I found I was going shopping every day and trying to get a taste of everything. But now I'm cooking things and freezing individual portions so I don't need to shop nearly as much.

There are ways round it BL so don't dispair. The healthy option doesn't have to be the more expensive option. I'm sure of that. I've got a tight budget and I'm trying to stick to no more than £60-£70 a week but some weeks it's loads less because I use up the stuff I've frozen.

I know how horrible it is being in debt too and how frustrating life can be because ultimately it all comes down to money.

See if you can find a copy of Delia Smith's 'Frugal food'. It's got some good ideas for cheap and healthy recepies. Plus there's LOADS of books in the shops on how to eat on a shoestring budget and stay healthy. Espcailly at the moment with everyone feeling the pinch.

Well done for sticking to your guns. In all of this, your health is by far the most important thing.

Take care and lots of hugs xxx

 

[vintella]

hey BL
i do the same as rachel- although box is just for my baby and oh at the minute for the 2 of them the box is £14.95 and will go up to £20 when i am eating again. i find it handy because i know exactly how much it is always going to be and we always get a different selection so it inspires us to try out different recipies.
maybe worth a try?
good luck with what ever you decide
(i think if you are planning every meal there isnt that much more you can do)
ella
x