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Bears get to hibernate and do nothing but sleep for six months. I wish I could do that.
Before they hibernate, they eat themselves stupid. I wish I could do that.
Bears' offspring are walnut-size and are born while the mother is asleep. Mother bears wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs. I definitely wish I could do that.
Everyone knows mama bears mean business. They swat anyone who bothers their cubs. If their cubs get out of line, they swat them too. I wish I could do that.
Papa bears EXPECT their mates to wake up growling. He EXPECTS them to have hairy legs and excess body fat.
Yep… I wish I was a bear!