IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED, try try try again and again (and again...)

Hi Jo, from one binger to another I know exactly what you are going through. I am still paying for my binging over the Christmas holidays! I still haven't lost it all after all these months. It has been so slow, think my body has given up on me because it takes weeks to lose just half a pound. :(

I have heard very good things about a book called Brain over Binge. I have ordered it on Amazon but am in the wilds of France so haven't received it yet so can't say if it will help me personally yet but it was highly recommended for my binging and it appears that it has helped many so may be worth looking into. I will report back to let you know if it has helped me or not.

As I said I do know how you feel and this is a daily struggle with me. I am doing JUDDD with Dukan but even though I still have weight to lose had thought about adding some carbs today on my up day. After reading your post am now having second thoughts! Good luck and hope you are able to get it back under control soon.
 
OK, here's my go at not too unkind amateur psychology: it's not really that you'll be seeing your sister and her maintained weight but more that she'll be seeing you and your unmaintained weight and that's causing a great deal of stress and in the back of your mind you are wondering how you can drop all the weight over the next 2 weeks to arrive in the UK slim. But you also know it's not really possible and the inner turmoil is sending you running toward the fridge because somewhere you're thinking what's a few more pounds anyway? It's the head, it's all in the head. I wish we could just do a few head-butts into the wall and knock the sense back!

Or, maybe I'm way off and that's not what's going on with you at all. Actually, that analysis may apply to me - similar situation with seeing sister and me about 50lbs heavier than last time we saw each other several years ago. All you can do is try to reign in the bingeing and hold your head up high. Gaining back some weight is not a personal failure, it's simply a self-imposed obstacle and we're still searching for the proper tools to remove it from our path. Don't let the stress ruin your trip :)
 
Just because historically being in England has equated with binges doesn't mean it will this time. That was the past, today is the present and you can decide whether you want the past pattern to extend into the future or you want the future to look different. Here's to drawing a line under the past and making your life from now on look as you want it to xx
 
Hear hear to all the above recent wise words Jo x
 
thanks ladies for your support. You're all spot on, of course, but I'm not seeing a way out of this diet / binge spiral at the moment. One day at a time, as alcoholics say...
 
Oh Jo I understand those words!!!!! GRRRR WHY do we do it!!! x
 
Moving over here rather than polluting Trudy's diary with my waffling...

I must copy Sara's post over here...

Tues, Wed and Thurs this week (last Mon was a bank holiday so part of "binge weekend") have been fine. I've been on my own - Tues evening on the way home I had the inevitable "what can I buy" thoughts but I convinced myself to not go there (knowing there were some errr "things" in this flat if the worst came to the worst). Those "things" are still intact. Amazing!

Now to triggers... although I'm definitely not ready yet (June 8...), I started thinking yesterday on my walk to work (waddle actually... I can really feel the bloat/fat in my legs hampering my walking!) as to which foods would figure in my hit list. Bread. Definitely. I could (and do!) eat a loaf at a sitting. But I also realised that it's only WHITE bread that makes me react this way. Brown/granary/wheatgerm etc etc I can take or leave so it'll be WHITE bread which will be avoided for life. I've always been a "bread snob", hating industrial plastic supermarket white bread that sticks to the top of your mouth, but I do like a fresh white loaf! Baguette. Etc. Can I live without them? Of course I can! After all, having dieted 95% of my life since the age of 12, that actually means I've not eaten that much in the grand scheme of things! (right?!!)

Another trigger is holidays... OK no more holidays EVER! haaaaa! Kidding BUT I've realised that this year I'm splitting my holiday time up into small breaks rather than taking much more than a week off at a time. That should help with the old weight if I revert to type!

Saturdays/Sundays are bad times at the moment. I know it's "simply" a question of getting back into routine, and it's tough saying "no" the first time, but easier subsequent times. I know it's particularly tough at the moment knowing I'm off to the UK next week - I know I know. Aside from my father being on the decline, I always find returning to my Mum's house very difficult. Although she passed on in 1997, returning to the house is always a shock somehow - as I've not actually been in it that often when you think of it since she died. I see her everywhere. There. I've said it.

Plus, looking at my diary for my UK break (just typed BREAD!), it's a nightmare. What do you do when you meet up with family and friends you've not seen in yonks? Meet up with them and EAT/DRINK! Endlessly!

I vaguely recall there was someone (some people) from New Brighton here on the forum? Care to make yourself known?
 
Jo, Trudy has made us all think of our triggers. I'm a bread snob too love the stuff and like you over the years have had very little but when I do I'm the same as you and can down a loaf with a pack of butter easy. I think of everything around when I stopped smoking, if I could do that I can do anything, I smoked 60 a day went to bed on a Sunday night and thought that's it I am sick of a little white stick ruling my life. Even though I have never had,(or want) another cigarette I know like an alcoholic I can never have another one again as I would just want more and more. Any way I waffling on your diary hear. What I am going round the houses to say is we need like you've said identify triggers and make a mental decision to never eat them again. Jo and relating a lot to your post today, I go to my dads many times as he lives around the corner and has a partner but every time I walk through the front door I see my mam and I've said to folk if I walked in and she was sat on the chair and said put the kettle on I would not batter an eye as its so difficult even after many years to believe that you wont SEE them again xxx Leave them goodies well and truly in the cupboards you don't need them xxx
 
Do you know what, gals, it strikes me that these very wise words would cost us a lot of dosh if we were paying for this therapy! :D

P x
 
HAHA we don't need therapists!!!! Jo glad your looking at your triggers and thinking about it as honestly I think and hope this will be a true way forward for us to put this diet roller coaster onto calm waters for life!!!! So many wee sayings I have read on here have hit the spot and I often think of strengthening my 'resistance' muscle when I say 'no' to temptation!!!! I know this will be hard and at times impossible but it's worth our very best shot I think!!! Have a lovely weekend - weather is supposed to be awesome - I am judging a show in Warick on Sunday and having got rid of the bloat belly a bit will wear my lovely polka dot dress and enjoy being a bit glam!!!! xxx
 
Maintainer said:
I vaguely recall there was someone (some people) from New Brighton here on the forum? Care to make yourself known?
Click to expand...

Hi Jo! I am from sunny New Brighton, I haven't been around for ages but thought I would pop on for a catch up on everyone's diary (because I am nosey) and saw your request for help. I'm not following dukan at the moment, I too am a bread snob/muncher and really identify with it being a trigger/comfort food, I should never have learned to bake the stuff.

When where you last over here? As New Brighton has become a bit more cosmopolitan in recent times (not compared to other places, but for New Brighton it seems so) There is a lot more choice of restaurants, obviously there is still the trusty old Harvester and the Queens which does a carvery. On the prom there is a Chimmichangas Mexican grill, The Hungry Horse which is a reasonably priced pub restaurant both of which have steak, salmon and chicken on the menu and I have had no problems when I have told them I didn't want any of the naughty extra carbs. La Tasca not particularly brilliant for Dukan but nice for treat. I think there are a few others Italian and Wetherspoons but haven't been to either as yet.

For those who have never visited New Brighton (probably everyone except Jo and Col) *Cosmopolitan = More than two restaurants Lol.

I hope this helps Jo. Have a lovely time with your family they love you no matter what you weigh, I am sure your mum will be looking down on you, try and embrace and enjoy the memories you have.

Katie x
 
Lovely posts ladies!
Thanks so much for the info, Katie. I'm really looking forward to revisiting OH's childhood haunts with him and, if the advanced forecast can be trusted, the weather will even be a little warmer than now too!
x
 
Hey I am from the Wirral too! New Brighton is great now it was awful for a long time I have some great memories from when I was little going to the fair there x
 
I'm looking forward to going on the ferry too... (I'll try to resist humming the song...).

Not much to report. Just two more work days until my holiday. Thursday am I've appointments for annual routine mammo and ovarian scans (fun but must be done!), but then we'll head up to Calais in the afternoon and see whether they'll let us on an earlier boat. (The fare structures have changed so, indignant at how much P&O were charging for a 4 hour either way flexible ticket - as opposed to "you must take the ferry you've booked" - I booked with a competitor! I wonder how many other people have done the same! The downside is that the competitor doesn't (yet) have as many crossings as P&O and I might end up hanging around for a few hours in Calais should they not let us on an earlier boat!!)

Back to grey and drizzle outside, after a beautifully sunny (but chilly) day yesterday...
 
Drinking lots of water before heading for ultrasound... it's raining (for a change!) so I'll go on the metro.

I had a bit of an upset at work yesterday. A colleague (I certainly won't call her a "friend" ever again), cheerfully recounting to me some backstabbing comments her officemates had been passing on various other colleagues, mentioned that one had said: "have you seen how much weight Jo has piled on?". I was stunned (a) that this "colleague" who I barely know would pass such comment (she's no skinny Minnie herself), and (b) that my so called "friend" would have repeated such a thing. The worst is that I cannot challenge "colleague (a)" without putting "(ex)-friend (b)" in the firing range. So I must keep quiet.

An additional incentive to lose this weight! I'm pretty furious though and would have cheerfully smacked BOTH of them yesterday!

Amazing to think that I'll be sleeping in my bed at my Dad's house tonight! (well I should be in it by 4am your time!).

Hope you all have a good couple of weeks and I'll be checking back in week of June 10...
x
 
ignore silly women Jo they are not worth the bother!
Hope you have a fab uk trip and the sun makes an appearance while your here x
 
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