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I've got 4 choices and dont know which way to go - Advice please -

sun

Silver Member
#1
Hi all,

maybe you can help me decide, your imput would be much appreciated!

OK, I lost 3 stone, done management, and have been quite lucky to have maintained within 5lbs of my target/goal.

I am due to go on holiday for 5/6 weeks on February 1st, as I see it I have 4 option/choices.

I have spoken to my LLC who has been fantastic, she has said it is my call and is happy with whatever I choose to do.

Option 1 - do 2 weeks of abstination before I go and hopefully lose
half a stone then not worry about it whilst away and
just monitor my food/alcohol intake.

Option 2 - Take 2 weeks supply away with me.

Option 3 - Just enjoy my holiday and( if I have to ) tackle the
weight gain when I return.

OR

Option 4 - Trust myself that I have maintained up til now so the
LONG holiday shouldnt be a problem and keep putting
my learnings and thought records into practice. This
option worries me and I have doubts!


I look forward to your views, advice and replies.

sun xxxxxxxxxxx
 
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#3
Hiya

What would worry me is that you are worried about option 4, at the end of the day long term maintenance does require you to have 150% confidence in yourself and the ability to have learnt the lessons and made the changes in your life. I would chat over your worries and doubts with your LLC and see what you can come up with as my advice would be option 4 but the way you worded it makes me think you think you can't do it (which of course you can!)

Mike
 

sun

Silver Member
#4
thanks ali,

Mike, I'm not surprised you spotted my option 4 doubts, so OK why am I doubting myself, I dont know, those thoughts are pre-diet thoughts, I have learnt a lot about myself, and thinking now logically, my diet overseas will be a very healthy one with fresh fish daily, I always drink vast amounts of water when in hot weather, I shall be very active with regular walking and swimming.

xx
 
#5
Only you will know those reasons but you will know what they are :)

If I use myself as an example then maybe I can explain it better.

When I was big I used to tell everyone the reason I was "unhappy" was that I was big and that if I lost the weight then I would be this super happy, super fit person and would run off into the sunset. The reality was though that I knew damn well that I was big because of other stuff that had happened in the past and being overweight was an effect of that stuff as opposed to actual cause. If it was just being overweight that made me "unhappy" then I would never have got overweight in the first place, I also used to say that I was big as I just liked my food too much but to get to a size where I was shortening my life meant that blaming it on the fact I just liked food wasn't true.

So anyway!

When I reached goal weight you don't really feel much difference, sure you can fit in nicer clothes, people tell you that you look good and sexy, you get more affection and attention from everyone, and everyone says to you things like " you must feel amazing" and "you must be so happy", but the reality is that you don't (or at least I didn't!) and in fact in some ways you feel worse because you have lost the outlet of food to cheer yourself up with so actually I felt more unhappy after losing weight than I did when I was big.

It also dawns on you that the weight loss bit is actually quite easy, it is a short/quick fix to losing weight but actually keeping the weight off has to be forever and hence you can't just keep having what you fancy all the time and have to find moderation.

The more I went along the more I realised that having lost an outlet in food made me feel worse which is why I believe people who stop smoking eat more and vice versa and also why people say they have "addictive personalities" as they are merely looking for an outlet in their lives but gambling, smoking, overeating etc etc are effects and not a cause.

So anyway (god this is a long post!) about 6 months after losing weight and telling everyone how great I felt when i didn't and also trying to kid myself that I was happy I actually did something about it, I split up with my wife for a few months (not recommending anyone to do that!) and basically dealt with my true problems which related back to my childhood and also the death of a close family member.

As soon as I dealt with that stuff I suddenly realised that I felt much much happier and since then I have never really struggled to keep the weight off as I dealt with the cause of my problems and not the effect of them.

So anyway!!! Back to you!!

My advice would be to explore (with help if you need it!) the true, original reasons for putting on weight and then to see if you can pull the root of the weed in dealing with that, then you can use the VLCD products to trim the weight off and then get your head set for a slimmer future.

But most of all and however hard it is you have to be true to yourself, if you know something in your past is a problem then you must deal with it OR just accept that you don't want to deal with it and will sort it out in the future.

M.
 

sun

Silver Member
#6
Firstly Mike you are some guy and truly deserve where you are today :)

I do understand the analysations you have pointed out and of your own personal demons which you have now laid to rest.

I've been fortunate in my life to have never had an ongoing weight problem, for me it started 10 years ago with early menopause at 39 which drastically changed my body shape bulking around the middle and then 2 years ago having Type II diabetes Insulin Resistance.

For me I HAD to address the issue for health reasons and my goal was to be off medication (which I now am).

We ALL have, or have had, 'issues' in our lives some of whom will be more trauma related and for this Mike and your own personal issues which you have laid to rest will hopefully help other members learn this valuable advice.

Thanks again Mike xxxx
 
#7
Hiya

I think you just answered your own problem ;-)

In terms of losing weight there are two strategies, the first is the away from strategy, in terms of you need to lose weight to move away from something, so for you it was an away from strategy because of your health reasons.

The other type of strategy is a towards strategy which I completely by accident had, my towards strategy was going to Florida and wanting to be slim to get there, I never realised that a towards strategy is so much more powerful than an away from, experience with clients says to me that a towards strategy is much much much much more effective than an away from, I have had clients say that they don't want to do die so will lose weight and don't get anywhere with it, but have had people say I want to be slim so I will live longer and tend to be much more successful, as I have said before to be positive about weight management is key!

Anyway in your case you stated that the reason for doing the diet was that you HAD to (you even capitalised it) and also your goal was to be off of medication (which you have done), therefore you have achieved your goal and hence your subconcious has done what you set out to do.

So my advice is now you need a towards strategy goal, doesn't have to be to climb everest but needs to be a fixed finite target in the future, it needs to be a personal target and something that is realisitic and totally acheivable. When you have the target then time to just focus on that target and let nothing stand in your way, including yourself.

My current "towards" strategy regarding my weight is to make sure I am under 14 stone on September 1st 2008, I will pop into Boots, get on the scales, smile, get off, and my treat will be some nice aftershave!! Doesn't require anymore than that!!

Mike
 
Likes: DQ

sun

Silver Member
#8
Another achievable goal :) Good Idea!

I'll put some thought into that and come up with something special

x
 
#9
Cool!

Right I shall stop the mind stuff and leave you in peace :)

Off to town to get a new Xbox as my current one is 13 months old and decided to burn out on Xmas eve so £300 for a new one I could well do without but missing my fix of beating my 8 year old at Fifa!

Mike
 
#10
Hi Sun

I would say, go there full of self confidence - trust and believe in yourself and that you can do it, but bring with you some packs in case it gets to be too much. I can understand fear of falling off - but this could be a good test for you and you may well surprise yourself! You made it this far after all!! :)

But - like you - knowing me, and past experiences, I think I would want a back up plan, hence the back up packs.....but I bet you won't need them, and by the sound of it - fresh seafood, fresh air, walking, etc., you may well lose weight!!

Have a great hols whatever y ou decide.
 
#11
I too would take option 4. You have got to test the water at some time and you might as well do it now.

Good luck whatever you do.
 
#13
I would go on holiday and go with option 4. You could have a healthy breakfast and lunch (you know what its like in the warm weather anyways.. and then enjoy the evenings. Alchohol would be my downfall on holiday.. anyway, whatever you decide to do, I hope you do well with it and have a fabby holiday.
 
#14
i would take some food packs with me on holiday, but not necessarily use them. If you feel you are doing fine then keep going with eating but if you are struggling then you can go back to food packs . IF you dont take them then you cant use them.
 

sun

Silver Member
#15
thanks guys,

its amazing the mixed feedback I have had, that s down to your own personal feelings.

One minute I am feeling confident that I can do it by myself, and secondly I feel I will take some packs away with me, as they will feel like a safety valve if I should need them.

The mind is a powerful piece of kit, as Mike (Ice Moose) said it took him some time to be at peace with his new self, maybe 16 weeks is still too early to have my own inner peace!
 
#16
One minute I am feeling confident that I can do it by myself, and secondly I feel I will take some packs away with me, as they will feel like a safety valve if I should need them.
Hi Sun (long time no speak lol- I have been out of sorts but will explain at some point)

I have every confidence you will be absolutely fine. But I would do as you say above - take some packs "just in case"

Good luck and hope you have a great time - where you going by the way?

xxxxxxxxxxxxx
 

sun

Silver Member
#18
thanks Ronnie and good luck on your journey

Hi Minnie, have missed you, mail me x

Am going to Koh Samui, Thailand.

xx
 
#19
Hi Sun

If i were in your shoes i would do packs during the day and a healthy meal at night. I managed to this when i was on holiday last time and it worked brilliantly.

Let us know what you decide....

Oh and i just want to add that since i've lost weight it has changed my life dramatically and, unlike Mike, has made me a ZILLION times happier than i was when i was fat. It's turned my life around like i could never have imagined! I feel like a completely different person - and that's a great thing for me! Losing the weight really feels like winning the lottery to me and i got to goal in May 2005 and although i experience fluctuations (i put on a stone over xmas!!!), i've never been higher than a size 12 since reaching goal and the lottery winning feeling has never gone away.

Good luck!
 

sun

Silver Member
#20
Karen, thats fabulous and inspirational, I myself can fluctuate within mostly 5lbs.

I feel great also.

thanks hun x
 


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