hahaha whoever said I was a saint .. I do wonder sometimes!!! :innocent0002:
Just managed to catch a rare quiet patch at work today, remember that filing that people called "an eyesore" and whatever else? I finally decided to get started on that. Ho hum. So boring... Ah well, makes room for lots more paperwork to pile up
Last night, Rocky Horror was ace.! I've seen the film, but I still didn't really know what to expect, but it was really good! I didn't get dressed up since I was going with my ma, and when we got there I decided that I had made the right decision - there wasn't that many in costume there to be honest, but I might have to be "in the area" at the weekend when the show's still on, see if people go OTT with it being a saturday!!
Food last night - we went to a bistro place which I had a chicken chilli burger, and curly fries, and salad - And I even ATE the salad too. And for dessert - chocolate fudge cake, warm, with vanilla icecream. I went to the docs earlier in the day about lady-problems. It's been 3 months without a period basically, and I'm definitely not pregnant, but still getting the moods, the tummy cramps, the headaches, the usual that I should be getting once a month. They've mentioned PCOS. I had this before, when I was 21 stone, and living in Hull, and when I lost the first lot of weight, everything settled down and returned to "normal". It scares me. I think it has scared me enough to sort my fat ass out. I feel a bit strange, like I can't really talk to anyone about it. I tried speaking to mum and she was basically a cow and told me off. I know it's my fault, I know it's me who's eaten all the fat food, I'm not stupid. Telling me off is not exactly supportive - When she gave up smoking 10 years ago, I was nice, I didn't just say "well you shouldn't have started in the first place. I'm scared to talk to BB about it, I don't want history to repeat itself. My nearest thing to a best mate is 4 or 5 months up the duff and it's "baby this" "baby that"... Not only can I not get a word in edgeways but this is her third now, I don't think she'd understand.
So why did I have all the bad food last night?
To get it out my system. For the past week or so, whenever I have been in the supermarket, I've looked at gatteauxs [how do you spell that?!] and been good, but I could easily have cracked in the next few days and scoffed the lot myself. "serves 10 people"... as if.
So. I had what *I* wanted, endured the nagging eye of my mother, and thoroughly enjoyed my meal. I can make that burger myself. Curly fries, I can do without but they were a nice treat. The cake, was delicious. But I don't necessarily want more.
So healthy eating. Which is difficult this week, everything keeps changing so my rigid plan is out the window. One day at a time.
Today we're having this:
Breakfast - Poached eggs on toast
Lunch - spicy beef pasta
Tea - chicken bolognese [I know, more pasta, but I like pasta!]
Snacks - banana, yogurt
Pudding - Strawberries and cream
I have a bar of galaxy in my desk, which has been there since yesterday. I don't desperately want it, I want to try and keep it for a bit.
Challenges this week -
Get BB to stay for tea tonight after he drops me off...
Chinese buffet lunch :|
Gym x 3
...and I think that is it!
I had a dream last night where my car was in a hit and run. It was strange! I went back to my car, in a car park, started the engine and it was all clunky. So I stopped, got out to look and the bonnet was up with a heap of bits sat next to the car, so I called BB to come and fix it, and he turned up and said "Ah, there's your problem. There's blood all over the front, it's been in a hit and run" and I was all "oh ok [as if it was a trivial thing!], well don't touch it, I'll call the police and then we'll go for tea". Then I woke up...
It was all so matter-of-fact... very strange! We were speaking like we were talking about sarnies or something, not a
hit and run.... Very odd..!
In real life, my car is in the garage and I'm waiting to hear how much the service will be.... Budget = £250... Fingers crossed please people....
Hope to get a catch up with you lot before long. Miss you already, it's only been a day!!! xx
