Rayven
Addicted to Minimins!
:sigh: Have just had a HUGE kick up the butt by my OH!
I said something along the lines of being bored with my life & all i got in reply was a HUGE sigh. I asked him why he was being like that and he said ' do you really want me to be completely honest or do you want me to gloss it?'
I said that i'd like him to be completely honest and he said 'well i don't want to upset you', at which point i started to worry about what was coming. I told him that i know he would never say anything to intentionally hurt me and for him to just be straight with me.
He held my hand and said that the reason he sighed is because i'm forever moaning about my life but that i'm never willing to put any effort into changing it and that it drives him mad because he just wants me to be happy and he knows i'm not, but that i have the power to make the changes but for God knows what reason - i don't.
I asked him what he meant and asked for an example - he again asked me whether i wanted complete honesty and said that i really wasn't going to like what he was about to say.
He said that although he loves me for me and would be quite happy for me to stay the same size, that i was always moaning about my weight, that i diet for a few days and then jack it in and start moaning again - that i'm bored at home (without the kids) and that i want to be a published writer but that i don't actually sit down and put some effort into realising my dream - that i moan cos we can't afford to get married but whenever we start saving i say its going to take too long and we're never going to be able to do it and instead go shopping. He said that he would back me whatever i decided to do as long as i'm happy but i'm obviously not and it infuriates him that i do nothing about it! :cry::cry:
The thing thats most upsetting is that he's right!
I'm my own worst enemy. I try and be positive about things but the positivity doesn't seem to last very long an i give up.
Sorry, i don't really know where i'm going with this post. The diet thata only really worked for me is Cambridge, i've got a 2 week supply in the kitchen but i just can't seem to get motivated. Surely being fat should be motivation enough?
I said something along the lines of being bored with my life & all i got in reply was a HUGE sigh. I asked him why he was being like that and he said ' do you really want me to be completely honest or do you want me to gloss it?'
I said that i'd like him to be completely honest and he said 'well i don't want to upset you', at which point i started to worry about what was coming. I told him that i know he would never say anything to intentionally hurt me and for him to just be straight with me.
He held my hand and said that the reason he sighed is because i'm forever moaning about my life but that i'm never willing to put any effort into changing it and that it drives him mad because he just wants me to be happy and he knows i'm not, but that i have the power to make the changes but for God knows what reason - i don't.
I asked him what he meant and asked for an example - he again asked me whether i wanted complete honesty and said that i really wasn't going to like what he was about to say.
He said that although he loves me for me and would be quite happy for me to stay the same size, that i was always moaning about my weight, that i diet for a few days and then jack it in and start moaning again - that i'm bored at home (without the kids) and that i want to be a published writer but that i don't actually sit down and put some effort into realising my dream - that i moan cos we can't afford to get married but whenever we start saving i say its going to take too long and we're never going to be able to do it and instead go shopping. He said that he would back me whatever i decided to do as long as i'm happy but i'm obviously not and it infuriates him that i do nothing about it! :cry::cry:
The thing thats most upsetting is that he's right!
I'm my own worst enemy. I try and be positive about things but the positivity doesn't seem to last very long an i give up.
Sorry, i don't really know where i'm going with this post. The diet thata only really worked for me is Cambridge, i've got a 2 week supply in the kitchen but i just can't seem to get motivated. Surely being fat should be motivation enough?