My Mum is cooking fried chicken, and oh my gosh it smells lush!! But here's my problem.... I'm not the slightest bit hungry! My stomach isn't rumbling, and I honestly feel like I'm full, BUT I still want to eat some!! This is obviously my problem, I only ever eat for the sake of eating, never because I am hungry! Usually I sit and eat crisp and chocolate all day long, so never get a hunger feeling because I'm always full up with crap!
I think more than just losing weight on this diet, I need to understand why I do this, surely its not normal for someone who wants to continually eat all day long, even if I'm not hungry!
Maybe greed is my problem, actually more to the point that is definitely my problem!
That's definitely something I'm going to have to learn to unlearn!
I think sometimes when I used to sit and binge on crisp and chocolate, I would get a feeling like - Oh what if I go to the shop tomorrow and there are no cheese and onion crisp left, so when I would eventually drag myself to the shop and buy 3 of everything, and that would be the same excuse the following day and so on, until after about 6 days, usually a Saturday, I would decide I was going on a diet on the Monday and that Sunday was my very last day of binging! My life has been like that for about 5 years!!
So I am definitely thinking that whilst on this diet, I need to train myself into new eating habits when I eventually am able to eat again! But how to do this? My Mum says just have 1 bag of crisp instead of 3 and then go for a walk, but clearly I can't do that! I think I'm scaring myself already!! Gosh is there such thing as being addicted to crisps? If so where is the nearest AA Crisp meeting because I need to get there asap!! " My name is Kerrie, and I'm addicted to Walkers " I am not mocking antibes addiction to anything here, I am being deadly serious!!
Well that has definitely given me something to think about, it's not all bad though, if I have found the fault in how my eating habits were, surely that's half a accomplishment right??!! I hope so anyway!!
Much love from a very confused Walkers queen ( So my Mum calls me ) xx