nomoremuffintop
Gold Member
i will be back on monday....
just need to jott some stuff down.
iv not been feeling too good since new year. i have really let stuff get on top of me including bills and my weight. iv gained 35lb since september and im totally disgusted in myself. i lost 30lb in my 1st 26days on lipotrim and i felt such a huge benefit from the loss. i feel huge and slobby now. i dont have anything to wear and i cant even do up my size 16 coat. im freezing when i have to go out in just leggings a vest top and 3 cardigans because thats all that will stretch over my fat! i had a home visit from health services and they have referred me to mental health team again which is a relief as i dont feel myself and it affects everyone around me. bipolar is not my friend at the moment. i sometimes find she is the only friend i have?! i find myself refering to my illness as a 2nd person because shes been with me for years and never leaves. sometimes she makes me sad/cross/angry or even really happy (too happy lol) and then theres 'muffy' who i refer to as a 3rd person. i know that 'muffy' is the person i am when im dieting and on track. i just dont seem to be able to get a hold of her right now because bipolar is taking up so much of my time
trying to think positive and getting some help and new medication might be just what i need? i see my doctor monday too so starting new medication and getting back to the diet should be a good positive fresh start for me.
anyhooo, hoping to be back on track monday. i want to say ill be back tomorrow but sundays are hard days to restart because of cooking the family meal on sundays is too much temptation for me. im cooking jerk chicken instead of a roast and that is way too nice to not have any!
so monday it will have to be. im going to be able to afford some shakes on wednesday so that a relief. ill order my shakes and stock up on 'safe' flavoured water. setting huge goals for the 1st few weeks. i need to lose atleast 9lb in my 1st week back so that i can keep motivated.
so here goes. muffy will hopefully be moving back in with me on monday but the scales are going to be a big NO! NO!they are not going to win again. i will be ts so i will lose weight. i done it in january 11 and i can do it again.
xx
:ashamed0005:
just need to jott some stuff down.
iv not been feeling too good since new year. i have really let stuff get on top of me including bills and my weight. iv gained 35lb since september and im totally disgusted in myself. i lost 30lb in my 1st 26days on lipotrim and i felt such a huge benefit from the loss. i feel huge and slobby now. i dont have anything to wear and i cant even do up my size 16 coat. im freezing when i have to go out in just leggings a vest top and 3 cardigans because thats all that will stretch over my fat! i had a home visit from health services and they have referred me to mental health team again which is a relief as i dont feel myself and it affects everyone around me. bipolar is not my friend at the moment. i sometimes find she is the only friend i have?! i find myself refering to my illness as a 2nd person because shes been with me for years and never leaves. sometimes she makes me sad/cross/angry or even really happy (too happy lol) and then theres 'muffy' who i refer to as a 3rd person. i know that 'muffy' is the person i am when im dieting and on track. i just dont seem to be able to get a hold of her right now because bipolar is taking up so much of my time
trying to think positive and getting some help and new medication might be just what i need? i see my doctor monday too so starting new medication and getting back to the diet should be a good positive fresh start for me.anyhooo, hoping to be back on track monday. i want to say ill be back tomorrow but sundays are hard days to restart because of cooking the family meal on sundays is too much temptation for me. im cooking jerk chicken instead of a roast and that is way too nice to not have any!
so monday it will have to be. im going to be able to afford some shakes on wednesday so that a relief. ill order my shakes and stock up on 'safe' flavoured water. setting huge goals for the 1st few weeks. i need to lose atleast 9lb in my 1st week back so that i can keep motivated.
so here goes. muffy will hopefully be moving back in with me on monday
but the scales are going to be a big NO! NO!they are not going to win again. i will be ts so i will lose weight. i done it in january 11 and i can do it again. xx
:ashamed0005:
