My "fad/crash diet rehab" diary - 2 stone gone, 3 to go
- Thread starter Escapade
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Escapade
Full Member
Been having a think about my fad diet rehab and I think the fact Ive lost even when not dieting, has proved to me that how I am doing it this time is really mending my body and the damage I did with food replacement and crash diets, when I was on exante, if I had 1 month off the diet, I would of easily gained a stone. I was crapping myself about stepping on the scales after a few weeks off plan, I was preparing myself to be back into the 14's because I really hadn't been very good!
I was absolutely amazed to see the scales had gone down! Before when I would get a huge gain, I would get so down on myself and I would really struggle to get back in to it, I would be thinking whats the point of starving myself for so long just to regain it so easily and quickly! Maintaining before was always soooo hard work, I would have to drastically reduce calories to try and maintain, I would be starving and still gaining! But at the time, I was so dead set that food replacement was this magical answer to all my weight problems, it wasn't... it was diets like that, which caused my weight problems and my awful relationship with food.
We all want to be skinny tomorrow... we don't want to wait 6 months, a year... 2 years... we want a quick fix, we want the weight gone and we want it gone fast so we grasp onto diets that others have lost weight with... are they successful? See how much that person weighs in 6 months off the diet... that's the real proof of success, not losing the weight in the first place, but keeping it off and still living life. We need to stop thinking we can repair the damage and weight that's taken 5 - 10 or even 20 years to come on, I might not be skinny by next month, I probably wont be skinny by the end of the year but I will be smaller then I was when I started, a hell of a lot smaller then if I hadn't of started this and I will have a better relationship with food then I would if I had of stuck with the yoyo diets.
Who would of thought half a pound a week for a few weeks would make me so happy! Before that would of been a huge failure, but not anymore!
I was absolutely amazed to see the scales had gone down! Before when I would get a huge gain, I would get so down on myself and I would really struggle to get back in to it, I would be thinking whats the point of starving myself for so long just to regain it so easily and quickly! Maintaining before was always soooo hard work, I would have to drastically reduce calories to try and maintain, I would be starving and still gaining! But at the time, I was so dead set that food replacement was this magical answer to all my weight problems, it wasn't... it was diets like that, which caused my weight problems and my awful relationship with food.
We all want to be skinny tomorrow... we don't want to wait 6 months, a year... 2 years... we want a quick fix, we want the weight gone and we want it gone fast so we grasp onto diets that others have lost weight with... are they successful? See how much that person weighs in 6 months off the diet... that's the real proof of success, not losing the weight in the first place, but keeping it off and still living life. We need to stop thinking we can repair the damage and weight that's taken 5 - 10 or even 20 years to come on, I might not be skinny by next month, I probably wont be skinny by the end of the year but I will be smaller then I was when I started, a hell of a lot smaller then if I hadn't of started this and I will have a better relationship with food then I would if I had of stuck with the yoyo diets.
Who would of thought half a pound a week for a few weeks would make me so happy! Before that would of been a huge failure, but not anymore!
Escapade
Full Member
Plodding along, sticking to the diet pretty much, all im doing different to the weeks I was maintaining is having salads for dinner, normally chicken salad with 2 or 3 new potatoes depending on their size and staying away from biscuits. For lunch I have either a ham sandwich or pita bread, with a package of low fat corn crisp type things and for breakfast either cornflakes or Weetabix, which is basically what I was having for lunch and breakfast when maintaining, so nothing amazing or difficult, but it fills me up and its all quick and easy to do. I find when Im cutting back, I just need to not really think about food, if I put too much thought into doing different meals, I start to crave bad things, so its much easier to just stick to the same type of meals.
Looking forward to my first weigh in being back on it the diet, to see how much weight I can get shifted again, hopefully after this next weigh in I can really start chasing getting 2 stone lost, which I am currently 6lbs away from, then Im only just over 3lbs away from getting into the 12's. Still hoping to get into the 12's within the next 4 weeks... not sure if that's being a bit over ambitious but I'll give it a go and ideally I would like to get into the 10's by Christmas, which is 30 weigh ins for me... so Im 38lbs away from the 10's so it is possible but its not going to be the end of the world, as long as I lose some weight every month, even if its just a few pounds each month, its better then gaining weight and Ive been trying to think why is it so important for me to lose weight quickly... what difference will it make to my life?
Im already in a happy relationship, he doesn't want me to change, Ive got good friends who judge me for me, not my weight, maybe it would be nice to be a bit fitter... to be able to wear clothes I like rather then clothes that fit... but why does that need to be as quickly as physically possible... I think that's the main reason for my failure in the past, because Ive set myself unrealistic goals and then I think ive failed and give up.
The only reason I would like to be in the 10s by Christmas is because my hubbys work has a big ball and we all get dressed up in ball gowns and in the 10s would make me a comfy 14 or a 12 in more generous shops, usually I have to wear something I don't really like because nothing fits me or looks nice when Im a size 20... AND because I like to deny how big I am, I refuse to buy dresses in a size 22 or 24 and stick to something with a bit of stretch into it so I can get into a size 18 lol but I would looooove to buy a dress because I look at it and think wow that's lovely, not because its the only thing that will fit, I always hide away from cameras and cringe when some photo ninja managed to get a snap of me and puts it on fb. To be honest just being in the 11's would be enough to make me happier with my dress choice as I should be a size 14. But it isn't going to be the end of the world if Im in a big size 14 or size 16. I think I was around 15 and a half stone at the last ball, so whatever happens I will be a lot smaller then that for this one.
Looking forward to my first weigh in being back on it the diet, to see how much weight I can get shifted again, hopefully after this next weigh in I can really start chasing getting 2 stone lost, which I am currently 6lbs away from, then Im only just over 3lbs away from getting into the 12's. Still hoping to get into the 12's within the next 4 weeks... not sure if that's being a bit over ambitious but I'll give it a go and ideally I would like to get into the 10's by Christmas, which is 30 weigh ins for me... so Im 38lbs away from the 10's so it is possible but its not going to be the end of the world, as long as I lose some weight every month, even if its just a few pounds each month, its better then gaining weight and Ive been trying to think why is it so important for me to lose weight quickly... what difference will it make to my life?
Im already in a happy relationship, he doesn't want me to change, Ive got good friends who judge me for me, not my weight, maybe it would be nice to be a bit fitter... to be able to wear clothes I like rather then clothes that fit... but why does that need to be as quickly as physically possible... I think that's the main reason for my failure in the past, because Ive set myself unrealistic goals and then I think ive failed and give up.
The only reason I would like to be in the 10s by Christmas is because my hubbys work has a big ball and we all get dressed up in ball gowns and in the 10s would make me a comfy 14 or a 12 in more generous shops, usually I have to wear something I don't really like because nothing fits me or looks nice when Im a size 20... AND because I like to deny how big I am, I refuse to buy dresses in a size 22 or 24 and stick to something with a bit of stretch into it so I can get into a size 18 lol but I would looooove to buy a dress because I look at it and think wow that's lovely, not because its the only thing that will fit, I always hide away from cameras and cringe when some photo ninja managed to get a snap of me and puts it on fb. To be honest just being in the 11's would be enough to make me happier with my dress choice as I should be a size 14. But it isn't going to be the end of the world if Im in a big size 14 or size 16. I think I was around 15 and a half stone at the last ball, so whatever happens I will be a lot smaller then that for this one.
Escapade
Full Member
13 stone 6 and a half pounds this week so that's 2.5lbs off, meaning im only 3.5lbs off of my 2 stone loss. TOTM is due in about a week though so next week may not see a loss at all... if I could get a pound off I would be happy though as that would mean I could very possibly hit my 2 stone loss the week after!
My husband has just surprised me with a holiday he has booked, 2 weeks in the Caribbean, leaving the end of August... arghhhh turmoil! So excited but I really really want to be able to wear swimwear and not feel like a huge fat lump... I'll have 12 more weight ins BUT Ive got two festivals, which will be all day drinking and eating crap... ive got a birthday party and a weekend away.... so realistically I would of been happy to just stay the same during that time but now I desperately want to lose as much weight as physically possible... if I could manage to lose 2lbs each week, I would lose 24lbs putting me at 11 stone 10.5lbs, admittedly I wouldn't be skinny at that weight but I would be a bit more of a (and I hate this word.. but) "normal" feeling weight, at that weight there would be a lot of other women around the same kind of size as me, obviously there will also be the body beautiful skinny girls looking amazing in tiny bikinis but as long as I don't stand out as being HUGE I can cope with that.
Our last holiday I was over 15 stone and I pretty much refused to wear swimwear, well I wore it but wore shorts over the top to go swimming, I would sunbath in sun dresses or shorts and vest tops, while everyone else was in bikinis... yes there were women around my size then and my size now in bikinis, fantastic if they feel confident enough to do that... but I didn't... I would wait until there was less people around to walk from my sun lounger to the pool and would dread getting back out the pool. I don't want to feel like that on a holiday that's meant to be a real treat for us.
I would like to be able to wear structures slimwear bikinis, wired, padded top and high wasted hold you in bottoms... maybe I would feel comfortable enough at 12 stone... maybe 12 stone is a realistic weight loss by the time I go... I guess I just have to try my best and see how I do, really cut back the days before and after the days Im going to be totally off plan, we will see!
My husband has just surprised me with a holiday he has booked, 2 weeks in the Caribbean, leaving the end of August... arghhhh turmoil! So excited but I really really want to be able to wear swimwear and not feel like a huge fat lump... I'll have 12 more weight ins BUT Ive got two festivals, which will be all day drinking and eating crap... ive got a birthday party and a weekend away.... so realistically I would of been happy to just stay the same during that time but now I desperately want to lose as much weight as physically possible... if I could manage to lose 2lbs each week, I would lose 24lbs putting me at 11 stone 10.5lbs, admittedly I wouldn't be skinny at that weight but I would be a bit more of a (and I hate this word.. but) "normal" feeling weight, at that weight there would be a lot of other women around the same kind of size as me, obviously there will also be the body beautiful skinny girls looking amazing in tiny bikinis but as long as I don't stand out as being HUGE I can cope with that.
Our last holiday I was over 15 stone and I pretty much refused to wear swimwear, well I wore it but wore shorts over the top to go swimming, I would sunbath in sun dresses or shorts and vest tops, while everyone else was in bikinis... yes there were women around my size then and my size now in bikinis, fantastic if they feel confident enough to do that... but I didn't... I would wait until there was less people around to walk from my sun lounger to the pool and would dread getting back out the pool. I don't want to feel like that on a holiday that's meant to be a real treat for us.
I would like to be able to wear structures slimwear bikinis, wired, padded top and high wasted hold you in bottoms... maybe I would feel comfortable enough at 12 stone... maybe 12 stone is a realistic weight loss by the time I go... I guess I just have to try my best and see how I do, really cut back the days before and after the days Im going to be totally off plan, we will see!
Escapade
Full Member
The dreaded food replacement is seeming mighty tempting at the moment 
but I know I will gain like crazy while on holiday if I do that and stand the chance of not sticking to it and not losing anything, esp with planned days off... I know food replacement isn't the answer for me but I know that in 12 weeks I could probably lose 2 and a half to 3 stone if I stuck to it 100% which would see me into the 10's
but I know I will gain like crazy while on holiday if I do that and stand the chance of not sticking to it and not losing anything, esp with planned days off... I know food replacement isn't the answer for me but I know that in 12 weeks I could probably lose 2 and a half to 3 stone if I stuck to it 100% which would see me into the 10's
TracyGWill
Gold Member
Escapade said:The dreaded food replacement is seeming mighty tempting at the moment
Nooo, don't do it, for all the reasons you yourself have said on your diary! You're doing really well and repairing some of the damage to your metabolism, so it wouldn't be worth throwing all that away for a purely short-term "quick win". Sorry, I know you don't know me, but I just read through your diary and felt I had to comment when I saw your resolve was weakening.
xx
Escapade
Full Member
Thank you Tracy, your right, I know food replacement isn't the answer... it is purely just a quick fix... and the weight will fly back on as it did before but man its tempting haha, but no I wont do it.
If I could get another stone and a half off before we go that would be amazing, which is 1.75 lbs a week, hopefully that should be do'able, even with the few days off the diet, if I can manage to lose a bit more some weeks, it should fingers crossed make up for the small loses on the weeks that I'm not going to be 100%
If I could get another stone and a half off before we go that would be amazing, which is 1.75 lbs a week, hopefully that should be do'able, even with the few days off the diet, if I can manage to lose a bit more some weeks, it should fingers crossed make up for the small loses on the weeks that I'm not going to be 100%
TracyGWill
Gold Member
Escapade said:
I'm glad to hear that, hon, the arguments you'd been making yourself for not doing a VLCD were very valid, so stay strong! I've never done a proper VLCD myself, but did foolishly do what was basically a starvation diet myself when I was 20, and that kicked off 30 years of problems for me, so I'm a firm advocate of "slow and steady wins the race" nowadays!
xx
Escapade
Full Member
Yes, my weight problems were started by starving myself on and off for a few years as a teenager, then I lost a lot of weight very quickly with total food replacement, the weight was almost all back on within 2 years of starting to eat again, and that was with losing a stone here and there on food replacement over that time, its scary how much I gained and how fast it came on.
TOTM started today so hopefully it may have finished by the time next weigh in so I may see a tiny loss this week after all, if not Im not going to panic because it will come off next week, as long as I don't stuff my face.
TOTM started today so hopefully it may have finished by the time next weigh in so I may see a tiny loss this week after all, if not Im not going to panic because it will come off next week, as long as I don't stuff my face.
You remind me so much of myself and my own attitude towards food. I lost a stone in a fortnight before xmas on the exante diet but have since put it all back on plus more. This time round im trying to lose weight for good by doing it slowly and changing my attitude to food but its hard. I've lost half a stone in the first three weeks which is good but just seems such slow progress it makes me feel tempted to do a quick fix. Keep up the good work!
Escapade
Full Member
1.5lbs off this week and to be honest I don't deserve anymore then that, as I haven't been that great, had two meals out, with dessert opps, so Im really pleased I managed to lose, it also means Ive now lost 2 stone.
Every stone I am taking measurements, with this stone I have lost 3 inches from my waist, 1 inch from around my chest, 2 inches from under my chest, 2 inches from my hips, 1 inch from each thigh and half an inch from each arm, meaning I have lost a total of 11 inches with this stone, I lost 14.5 inches with the last stone so by losing 2 stone I have lost 25.5 inches of fat from my body!
Every stone I am taking measurements, with this stone I have lost 3 inches from my waist, 1 inch from around my chest, 2 inches from under my chest, 2 inches from my hips, 1 inch from each thigh and half an inch from each arm, meaning I have lost a total of 11 inches with this stone, I lost 14.5 inches with the last stone so by losing 2 stone I have lost 25.5 inches of fat from my body!
Escapade
Full Member
Just been having a think about how my eating habits have changed and thought I would cross post something I just wrote on another post try and keep all my ramblings in one place.
Something I do naturally now, without really thinking about it and it may help others struggling, it kind of started from hearing friends say about the 5:2 diet, which is based on a weekly calorie intake rather then a daily calorie intake, ie you drastically reduce calories for 2 days, each normally for 5 days, then your weekly calorie intake is lowered so you lose weight by only dieting for two days. Each day my calories are different, I also read that this helps stop your weight loss from stopping or slowing because your calories change all the time. So I worked out the calories I needed to lose 2 lbs a week, divided that by 7 and then I have three days on that number of calories, then 2 days of higher calories and two days of low calories, it stops me from having a bad day and thinking that's it... i've blown this week, I just think that's 1 of my high calorie days used up, best be extra good tomorrow, it also stops me from getting the "sod it" mentality when I do eat something bad, before I would eat something I shouldn't and be like ahh todays ruined, might as well keep stuffing my face, but because I still count the calories and although I allow myself to go over, I still count it and have to cut back another day, its stopped me from being a idiot and stuffing loads of crap into my face just because I ate one thing I shouldn't, then that would turn into a "sod it" week because I'll restart next week.... I was always restarting next week
Dieting/healthy eating/life style change, whatever you want to call it, is about finding something that works for you, it isn't about sticking to something that you struggle with every single day, my personal trainer told me to not make a change in my life to lose weight that Im not willing to do every week for the foreseeable future... because I may lose the weight but it will just come straight back on, you have to make changes in your life that you are willing to keep up.
Sometimes Friday before weigh day are bloody horrible because Ive left myself with hardly any calories, but after a few weeks of eating nothing but salad on Fridays... and I don't bloody eat so much the rest of the week now lol because I punished myself by forcing myself to come in within my weekly calorie goal and I was hungry... I was grumpy... I wanted to eat crap and say sod it... maybe it isn't healthy but it taught me to stop being a pig and now I very rarely have weeks where I have pretty much used my calories up, because I decide what days are on calorie days, over calorie days and under calorie days, so I plan that around what Ive got on that week. My loses aren't huge, but they are consistent and yes I could happily live like this for the rest of my life, which is what I am going to have to do if I don't want to regain again.
I would use every excuse in the book... Im stressed, I'm tried, Life is being crap, I'm sad, I'm happy, I'm hurt etc to turn to food and food never made me feel better, it always made me feel like a failure or ugly, or unimportant, because society has a way of making women think they are second rate if they are very overweight, then some bloke would mess me around or not be interested and straight away... "its because Im fat" that would throw me into starvation diets desperate to "show them" I would drop the weight at an alarming pace, then it would fly straight back on. I was always dieting for the wrong reasons and doing it the wrong way. I don't need to prove anything to my husband, he loves me the same at 15 stone as he does at 10 stone but in my younger days I was always dieting to try and win the affection of some bloke... who was really just an idiot and treated all women the same... it wasn't because I was a bit overweight... it was because they just weren't very nice people. Starving myself never made me feel better either.... you need a balance.
try and keep all my ramblings in one place.Something I do naturally now, without really thinking about it and it may help others struggling, it kind of started from hearing friends say about the 5:2 diet, which is based on a weekly calorie intake rather then a daily calorie intake, ie you drastically reduce calories for 2 days, each normally for 5 days, then your weekly calorie intake is lowered so you lose weight by only dieting for two days. Each day my calories are different, I also read that this helps stop your weight loss from stopping or slowing because your calories change all the time. So I worked out the calories I needed to lose 2 lbs a week, divided that by 7 and then I have three days on that number of calories, then 2 days of higher calories and two days of low calories, it stops me from having a bad day and thinking that's it... i've blown this week, I just think that's 1 of my high calorie days used up, best be extra good tomorrow, it also stops me from getting the "sod it" mentality when I do eat something bad, before I would eat something I shouldn't and be like ahh todays ruined, might as well keep stuffing my face, but because I still count the calories and although I allow myself to go over, I still count it and have to cut back another day, its stopped me from being a idiot and stuffing loads of crap into my face just because I ate one thing I shouldn't, then that would turn into a "sod it" week because I'll restart next week.... I was always restarting next week
Dieting/healthy eating/life style change, whatever you want to call it, is about finding something that works for you, it isn't about sticking to something that you struggle with every single day, my personal trainer told me to not make a change in my life to lose weight that Im not willing to do every week for the foreseeable future... because I may lose the weight but it will just come straight back on, you have to make changes in your life that you are willing to keep up.
Sometimes Friday before weigh day are bloody horrible because Ive left myself with hardly any calories, but after a few weeks of eating nothing but salad on Fridays... and I don't bloody eat so much the rest of the week now lol because I punished myself by forcing myself to come in within my weekly calorie goal and I was hungry... I was grumpy... I wanted to eat crap and say sod it... maybe it isn't healthy but it taught me to stop being a pig and now I very rarely have weeks where I have pretty much used my calories up, because I decide what days are on calorie days, over calorie days and under calorie days, so I plan that around what Ive got on that week. My loses aren't huge, but they are consistent and yes I could happily live like this for the rest of my life, which is what I am going to have to do if I don't want to regain again.
I would use every excuse in the book... Im stressed, I'm tried, Life is being crap, I'm sad, I'm happy, I'm hurt etc to turn to food and food never made me feel better, it always made me feel like a failure or ugly, or unimportant, because society has a way of making women think they are second rate if they are very overweight, then some bloke would mess me around or not be interested and straight away... "its because Im fat" that would throw me into starvation diets desperate to "show them" I would drop the weight at an alarming pace, then it would fly straight back on. I was always dieting for the wrong reasons and doing it the wrong way. I don't need to prove anything to my husband, he loves me the same at 15 stone as he does at 10 stone but in my younger days I was always dieting to try and win the affection of some bloke... who was really just an idiot and treated all women the same... it wasn't because I was a bit overweight... it was because they just weren't very nice people. Starving myself never made me feel better either.... you need a balance.
Escapade
Full Member
Had a bit of a bad day Sunday with a big fathers day meal with all the family, the scales are not being kind on my mid week check in, so I will be lucky to stay the same this week, unless something drastic happens in the next few days but oh well.
Still staying motivated though, not letting one bad food day ruin my whole week, as that would certainly mean a gain, but on the plus side I did fit back into my size 16 super skinny jeans today, which is the first time in way over a year they have fit, I know not many people celebrate being a size 16 lol but I was probably easily a size 20 maybe even a 22 when I first started, so hopefully another stone and a bit and I will be getting back into my size 14 skinny jeans.
Still staying motivated though, not letting one bad food day ruin my whole week, as that would certainly mean a gain, but on the plus side I did fit back into my size 16 super skinny jeans today, which is the first time in way over a year they have fit, I know not many people celebrate being a size 16 lol but I was probably easily a size 20 maybe even a 22 when I first started, so hopefully another stone and a bit and I will be getting back into my size 14 skinny jeans.
Escapade
Full Member
1lb off this week, didn't deserve anymore then that, to get to my holiday goal I do need to pull my finger out and stick to the diet a bit better, but to be honest even if I lose 1lb a week for 10weeks its better then gaining and I'll still be a lot smaller then I would of been if I hadn't of started healthy eating, but hopefully I can get a bit more off then that!
