o/t. assult

Discussion in 'Very Low Calorie Diets' started by lynjo, 30 October 2006 Social URL.

  1. lynjo

    lynjo Full Member

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    my 7 year old son was yesterday slapped by another child, 10 or 11yrs old, while out playing. The child is a neighbour who is always out causing trouble and ruining other kids fun whilst playing etc etc. now while i accept that there willl always be arguments and disagreements between kids this is another matter. my son was riding his bike with his friend when this other boy started to call them names, my son said dont call us names its not nice and proceeded to ride away. the boy then went up to my son and slapped him leaving a hefty palm print across his cheek. my son ran in to tell his friends dad and then came in to tell me what had happened. Now knowing of this family well and their bad reputation in the area i couldnt go and approach the family as i would likely have got a slap too. (sound nice dont they? but really thats what they are like!!!) i went to the police station because now after 4years of having problems with all of their 6 kids i have had enough, name calling i can deal with but assult is nother matter. the police said that because this offending child is only 10 years old nothing can be done! i cant even log a complaint about him!!! he is under age until he is 11, then he could be arrested. now as you can imagine i am relly fed up by this point. why should this boy be allowed to go around assulting other children and know he can get away with it. what happens when it doesnt stop at just a slap? i am so cross to say the least
    my other comment on this which may or may not be relevant is that all the houses are privately owned except for the one that this family live in, it is still a council property. could i, should i complain to the council about this behaviour and see if they will do anything about it. surely somewhere in their tenancy will be a clause about behaviour wont there? somebody else suggested that because of all the trouble the family cause maybe social services should made aware, now most of the things i would put down to kids being kids but when you put the whole lot together its a complete and utter shambles. i know the kids arent alwasy to blame and maybe the parents should be put in their place and bring their kids up right but when the parents really dont know what the kids are doing right under their noses and really dont give a damn when they are told what is going on, what can u do?
    So what can i do about this assult? what should i do? my son is really upset and wonders why he was slapped, i have tried explaining to him that not all people are nice people but at the end of the day i dont want him to be scared and we do unfortunately have to live near these people.

    sorry for rambling.
    any thoughts greatfully appreciated
     
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  3. lavender

    lavender Silver Member

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    feel really sorry for you and your son, something like this really brings out the lioness is us mothers and I can understand you both feel wronged.
    my eldest son was viciously attacked for no reason other than he was wearing a grammar school uniform and waiting for his bus home (he never went back to school and the gang who attacked him got off scot free despite it happening in broad day light in a busy town at 3.30 pm!!! )

    So I really understand the feeling of helplessness, you have done the right thing explaining to your son about not all people being nice and living as civalised humans, I truly believe what goes around comes around and they WILL get whats coming to them !!!
    In the meantime I would report them to the council and sad as it is to have to behave this way I would tell your son to give them a wide berth , after all he has done nothing wrong!!
    try to focus on the positives, like how lucky he is to know right from wrong and that the rest of the kids in your area aren't like that and just keep a log of any activity that help you present a picture of this charming family to the council.
    I hope your son get his confidence back soon, you sound like a loving and caring mum so I am sure that will go along way to supporting him in feeling safe.
    all the best.
     
  4. dizzy-n-mizzy

    dizzy-n-mizzy Not dieting ATM!

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    Hi Lynjo

    Glad you posted this because it probably helps you just venting. However, it doesn't help solve the problem.

    I think it is bad that the police aren't taking this seriously. Community policing and all that. It is ridiculous that they ignore this as that boys behaviour will likely escalate if left unchecked and the rest of the families too come to that. I understand why you do not want to speak to the family direct and if they are as you say this would probably only make things worse.

    I think the council is your best bet as I believe they do have policies that this is relevant to. I believe they have to keep a record of all complaints I have never been a council tenant but I think a standard of behaviour is in the tenancy agreement.

    It may make you feel better at the very least to make an official complaint putting something in writing.

    Keep a record of all incidents that happen from now on as it.

    It is terrible that we don't feel safe to let our children out to play these days. My boys long for more freedom and independence!

    Good Luck whatever you decide to do.

    Dizzy x
     
  5. magickmel

    magickmel Loves VLCD's !

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    Totally agree with Heidi. Your son has seen you go to the police and so he knows that you are taking him seriously. I would keep a log of any events like that and also report the behaviour to the council. I know it will be hard for him to give the boy a wide berth but its all he can do and its a hard lesson to learn that life isn't always fair. You have done everything you can in a frustrating situation and have handled it well.
     
  6. dizzy-n-mizzy

    dizzy-n-mizzy Not dieting ATM!

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    FURIOUS TO HEAR THAT!

    Lavender, great advice!

    So sorry to hear about your son, he must have worked really hard to get to Grammar school and for that to happen is disgraceful and there be nothing done!!! I am furious here, and finding it hard to imagine how you felt.

    I hope he is doing well now and recovered from the incident!

    Dizzy x
     
  7. ~lisa~

    ~lisa~ Full Member

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    Anti social behaviour is a BIG no no if you are a council tennant.
    Call the housing office, and see if they have an antisocial behaviour unit.
    Also as of right now start logging anything this child and family members do ... you'll need to do that if you want the council to step in.
    I have a family around me that is only a few complaints away from getting an ASBO, and the neighbours were all encouraged to keep logs of antisocial behaviour.

    hugs to you and your son.

    xxxx
     
  8. lynjo

    lynjo Full Member

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    thanks to you all

    it is so frustrating that i can do nothing immediately but i will certainly be going to the local council this afternoon and hopefully find out where we stand and what their thoughts and principles are on this. although it doesnt help my son i will certainly show him we are doing all we can and continue hopefully to teach him right from wrong. i believe in karma so maybe one day, just one day, i will wake up and the council will be doing something anout this even if the police dont. the boy cant stay 10 forever and next time maybe he wont get away with what he does, and unfortunately being the child he is there will be a next time (not if...)
    i do feel sad that my son now doesnt really want to play on the green outside of our house, even tho we have assured him we will be watching and checking constantly every 5 mins. i do still feel cross however as to y my son should be not able to play outside safely from other children, (child) y should he miss out, its not his fault we have one family t*****s for neighbours. if only i didnt have morals and principles i could go and get my own back.............but i wont, as much as i would like to.aaaaaaaaaaggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
    thanks for letting me help get it out of my system.
    i know i will get all emotional when talking to the council because i am so riled by this assult and the fact he can get away with it. my son wouldnt hurt a fly (long may he stay like that) and y anyone would want to do this i will never know.
    what a cruel world we live in.
    thanks guys
    off to the council i go.
     
  9. clairejen

    clairejen Lurker

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    This is so awful, I really feel for you and your son, the sense of impotence in this situation is terribly frustrating. I agree with all the advice about complaining to the council and logging events, this is what the police advise in "nuisance" situations. As you say, he can't stay 10 for ever, if the child attacks another child once he is 11 and it is reported to the police then he should end up with a record of assault on a minor which will stay on his criminal record for life.
     
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