Day 2 - and all is well surprisingly..... I've been hungry but its been bearable, just had half a bar will have the other half later on, and then another early night.
Had the coconut for breakie, it's actually really quite nice, reminded me of something, but not sure what, and had a b'nana tetra for dins at about 4. I'm actually feeling good, which is strange for me on day 2, but I'm gonna enjoy it while it lasts, I'm sure there will be bad days
Been spending a lot of time looking on Instagram and the pics of all the slim ( and very skinny) girls are definitely inspiring me... Routed out all my bikinis as I am going for a week away to Egypt at the end of november and stuck a load of my 'fat' pictures in the insides of my kitchen cupboards, Maybe that's why I'm feeling so inspired......
But there is also 'the annoying friend' who may be the reason I'm feeling so inspired ?? I have this 'friend' I say friend she's actually a relative, and sometimes her comments really get me down,
Last week she felt the need to update her Facebook status to say ' I wish people would stop moaning about having to go not hospital - no-one is interested' naturally i took that to be about me as I was in hospital that day, today her status was ' I wish people would stop moaning saying they are going to be going on diets, why don't they just get themselves to the gym, this way they can loose weight and eat what they like' again I took this to be about me.......
I haven't mentioned to her that I am going on this diet, but I'm sure that she has been told by other family members, and sometimes I just wish I could tell her to shut up, comments like 'if you want to lose weight so badly why don't you go to the gym' are her usual response, and they are not helpful to me in the slightest. I don't make a habit of feeling sorry for myself, but the truth is, up until 6 weeks ago ( when I had an operation) I was regularly going to the gym, working out 3-4 times a week, getting all sweaty and without any change in my weight at all, the pcos makes it near enough impossible for me to lose weight without drastic changes like Cambridge and i don't care what anyone says, I know this is the case.
I mean really does she think that i wouldn't prefer to eat ( actual real food) and go work out a few nights a week, does she think that i enjoy not eating solids and having these revolting shakes for 12 weeks at a time??
Sometimes people just don't think, I've spent years listening to flyaway comments like the ones above, feeling hurt, confused and frustrated that my body doesn't seem to be like everyone else's, and finally I've found an answer to why, I don't go about telling people, I don't want to be 'that girl' it's a running joke nowadays that all fat people say 'its glandular ' so this is always in my mind, and this is the reason I keep quiet about the symptoms of pcos........
So maybe yea, the reason I'm feeling so upbeat maybe to do with the attitudes of other people, who should maybe spend more time looking inwards and less time judging others.......
.................I feel better now
