Total Solution Suseka's WL Diary 2012

[Caz]

Well done for managing to stay on track even with everything at work and home. I can totally understand how you feel, I lived in Thailand for a while and during that time my mum went through radiotherapy and my sister fell and broke her tib and fib in her ankle, which meant she needed an operation for it to be pinned. She was in a wheelchair for close to 2 months before she was able to start walking on it again. I felt so useless it was horrible, so I do understand. How's your grand daughter doing now?

 

[Suseka]

Thanks Caroline - she's doing much better now. Still has a bad cough, but more chirpy (or so I'm told). It must have been really tough for you with all that going on with your family and you so far away.

I'm really torn at times - because my daughter lives in Norfolk and my son in Devon. There are times lately that I've been given serious thought to retiring further down South, but whenever I touch on the subject my daughter gets upset about it.

I'm not Norfolk born and bred (was brought up in London and have lived in various places since I was a young adult) - so I have no real roots here other than my daughter.

I've spent years here with my daughter and years apart from my son and I sometimes feel that I should redress the balance - but there's just no easy solution.

Feeling quite low about it at the moment best focus on something else before I get all maudlin.

 

[Suseka]

Friday 23 Feb weigh in = 4lbs loss

Am pleased with the 4lbs this week and at the end of my first month I've managed to lose 19lbs in total. Roll on month 2 - with a hope I can beat the average 1stone per month.

 

[Caz]

That's a fantastic loss, well done!

 

[Stapo60]

Well done Suseka, am proud of you.

 

[Suseka]

Oh dear - I dropped off the Exante wagon a bit yesterday had a difficult day at work and was so fed up when I got in, so when my OH suggested we pop out for a drink I just said "okay then" - with every intention of sticking to sparkling water (which I've been doing quite successfully since I started). Anyway - we get there and he says "go on, just one won't hurt" and rather than say "nope", I hear myself saying "true, just one then". Which would have been okay (not great, but okay) except one led onto two which led onto three I paid for it though as I've felt crap all day and I shan't be doing that again in a hurry. I have no doubt it will have stalled my WL, so I'm not expecting a good one

I am struggling with motivation - it's true, but I am still determined to stick at it. Also I find that the days I do my kettlebell workouts I could really do with something more - so I may have to plan in a little protein such as chicken those days (3 times a week) or maybe I should have four packs, rather than three.

I may try one week adding an extra pack in and see if that helps, before adding protein instead.

 

[Suseka]

Not a good loss this week...not at all. I know I should be grateful for any loss as it is, after all, a loss (not a gain, not sts). But I am disappointed in myself. No - I shouldn't have had those 3 glasses of wine (obviously) and yes - I have learnt a lesson, but with all that said... I'm still p***d off with myself.

Well, this just goes to show that you've just gotta stick to it as the plan says - 100%. It's so easy to say - just one bit of this or that won't matter, but it does.

This week's 1lb loss, means I have to work harder now to achieve my monthly one stone target - so head down and focus.

 

[Suseka]

Had a bit of good news today - my DS is coming to visit next weekend, with his gf and my 4 month old granddaugher (I've only seen her once, last October). Can't wait.

It'll keep me focussed for the next week or so -as I would really like to hit the 2 stone mark by then. I've upped my water and have been 100% since my last weighin - so hoping for a good one this week.

I'll have to think about what to do when they visit - my thoughts are either to do two WS days, or to come off Exante altogether, but keep to low carb (atkins style) meals, so I stay in ketosis.

I only get to see my son about twice a year, so I do want to enjoy their visit and accept that I might not lose anything that week.

 

[Suseka]

Fri 17 Feb (wk 6) WI = -4lbs

I'm now back on track with my 3-4lb per week wl goal with a 4lb loss this week, which, following last week's disappointing 1lb loss is a pleasing result.

I made sure I upped my water intake this week, keeping a 1 litre bottle at my desk and making sure I finished it. That, with my 7 - 8 cups of redbush and 2 or 3 cups of coffee -definitely puts me over the 3 litre mark everyday.

I'm also keeping up with my kettlebell workouts - almost finished week 5 of the programme with only one more week to complete. Then I start again with the heavier bell

I'm definitely seeing some definition in my arms and in my abdomen. It's a bit wierd as I still have a bit of a podgy front, but the sides (obliques I think) are toning, so it creates a bit of an odd profile. But as I lose weight and the fat deminishes, I'm hoping to see the beginnings of a six pack (well, maybe not 'six', perhaps more of a 2 1/2 )

This weeks loss has remotivated me -because there's not a lot worse that having low losses. It messes with your head. I spent a lot of last week thinking that if I had another low one, then I might as well do something like SW again. When I did that eons ago I lost on average 2lb a week.

Anyway - those thoughts have been put squarely 'back in the box' and I'm now thinking more about what new clothes to buy when I get to the 2 stone mark (which won't be long now)

 

[Caz]

Sounds like you're doing great!

 

[Suseka]

Week 7 (24 Feb) WL = - 2lbs

Back to lower than the average wl figures again yes, okay - it's a loss and that's great, but it would be even better if the numbers stayed around 4lb a week.

I've been about 80% TS and the other times all I've had is a few bits of chicken and green veg. I'm still fairly convinced the slow down is due to the exercise. So on one hand I'm frustrated with the low losses, but on the other - I'm enjoying the exercise and there's a definite change to my shape.

I finish the first round of the kettleworx programme this weekend, and am going to have a week off - and I'll see if next week I have a real whoosh.

It is tough sticking to a vlcd with low losses, when you see others doing so much better and I really cant work out why.

 

[Suseka]

My son, his gf and my little baby granddaughter are now on their way back home (to Devon) and I feel so desperately sad Have spent the last hour crying my eyes out :cry: and I now have the mother of all headaches.

I'm always like this when he leaves, it's pathetic and it always takes me a few days to 'get a grip' and drag myself out of a very dark and depressing mood.

We had a fantastic weekend, and I always love having both my son and daughter together (she lives here in Norfolk). But the time always passes too quickly and each time he leaves, a part of me dies inside. Yes, dramatic I know, but it's how I feel.

He's lived in Devon with his dad and his dad's family for about 7 years now and I'm finding it harder as the years go by. He came home to Norfolk for a short spell (when his dad and him were spatting a bit too much), but his love for his girlfriend drew him back.

He and his gf have had an on and off relationship for years and there have been times (selfishly, seeing as she is now the mother of his child), that I've wished it had stayed 'off' and he would have returned to a life in Norfolk.

It's so hard being separated from him, as we have a very strong mother/son relationship (nothing apron/string like), but we just really get on.

I had hoped that one day we could move closer, so that he was only say an hours journey time away (as opposed to 6 hours), but that means leaving my daughter in Norfolk - as she's really settled here now. So I can't win either way.

I've even thought about moving somewhere in between the two, but my OH says that's daft (and he's probably right).

The fact is we are not Norfolk folk, but have sort of settled here over the last 15 years or so, because this was his last posting (ex-RAF). So we have no family ties here, other than my daughter -but that's a damn strong tie, so there's no easy solution to my dilemma.

If I wasn't on this diet I'd be drowning my sorrows in a bottle of wine. As it is I've been off plan for two days and not expecting a good WL this week - but at the moment, I just don't give a damn.

Sorry for the depressing post - I just need to offload in my diary and try to oust some of these damn demons :sigh:

 

[Suseka]

Had a restless night and am still feeling very emotional. I'm going to have to 'pull myself together' for work today and it's going to be difficult. I wish I could lock myself away in an office and get on with stuff without talking to anyone - but that's just not going to happen. So its going to be a toughie today (only 8 hours to go )

Left OH in bed asleep this morning, I wanted to talk to him, but I knew he needed the rest (working nights).

I only managed to have two shakes yesterday - daft as it sounds, I just couldn't stomach another. I could easily have gone without having anything -because I just couldn't be bothered to 'eat'.

I suppose this is one change - ordinarily, if I was this upset before - I would reach for the wine bottle and something comforting food wise. Whereas now, I just don't want to eat or drink anything.

I don't know how to pull myself out of this 'dark spell', but I know I'm going to have to somehow. Keeping busy will help and occupying my mind with non family things will too. So work is a medicine of sorts.

Well - I best get ready for the first meeting of the day and hope no-one notices my bloodshot and baggy (sleep deprived) eyes.

 

[Suseka]

Hmm....am dreading my WI tomorrow. Was off plan on Sat and Sun (used no products, just ate protein and veg) and since Monday I've only had either 2 - 2 1/2 products every day (because I've been feeling right miserable).

I need to turn this around and get back on track and I think I'm either in for a sts or very low loss - which will be a right kick up the bum.

To top it off I had a really rubbish day at work, then got a text off my OH on the way home telling me he'd managed to flood the bathroom (left the tap running) as he got ready for work and didn't have the time to mop up before he left. So I had to spend ages mopping up the soaking wet carpet, and now the bathroom smells all damp and musty (yuk).

I think I'm going to have an early night - get up, see what the (scales) damage is and re-motivate myself in the morning.

 

[Suseka]

Week 8 (2 Mar) = -1lb

So my guess was right - this week has been another (very) poor WL. Of course I know why and it's my own fault - but that just makes it worse and I've now dropped under the 1 stone per month mark (by a lb). If I keep going like this it's going to take me the best part of the year to get to my goal and I just don't know if I can face that.

For two figs I'd come off Exante right now - but I've got at least two months worth of products!!! Anyway - I wouldn't know what else to do.

The whole point of doing a VLCD is to achieve good weight losses at a quick pace, but the last 4 weeks have been about the same as I lost on Slimming World before and during that time I was eating shed loads (of protein based meals).

I'll start working out again on Sunday (round 2 of kettlebells). Perhaps focussing on fitness will keep my mind off the scales for a bit.

 

[Suseka]

Right.....time to :whoopass: enough is enough.

I came right off plan last night and ate a whole bar of Galaxy It was stupid really, because with each piece I kept thinking (you're going to regret this), but that still didn't stop me polishing the whole thing off.

Okay, so I've not had the best week (for one reason or another) and yes, I was peed off with my slow WL (err, like eating flipping chocolate was gonna help ) It's not as if I really enjoyed it either.

So today I got up early - did Cardio week 1 (round 2), and really pushed myself through it (kept pace and reps). Then spent the next 3 hours cleaning. I've watched through the 'introduction' session on the Kettlercise DVD and I'm really looking forward to getting stuck into that at the end of KW round 2.

I'm now really focussed to get back on the TS 100% wagon and today is day 1 of that. I've put up a wallchart to mark my progress through the rest of March, so I can tick off every 100% day.

Now to get on with it.

 

[Suseka]

A rather worrying start to my Mar losses with, yet another, dismal 1lb loss. Okay, I know I was stupid and ate a bar of galaxy on Saturday, but with the amount of exercise I've done this week - that blip should not have had that big an impact. I have remained in ketosis throughout and have been 99.99% TS all week. the 0.01% off plan, isn't really that 'off' as I've only added in a few bites of protein (chicken) on the days I've worked out.

Which convinces me now that my slow losses are indeed caused by the kettlebell workouts I'm doing.

This is really causing me a dilemma now. The fact is, if I didn't have such a large stock of Exante products (easily 2 months worth) I think I would stop the VLCD now and move onto a low carb plan and carry on with the kettlebells.

But I do have 2 months worth - so, should I stop exercising with the kettlebells, finish the stock of shakes and bars I have and then move onto low carbing and back into Kettlebelling.

Decisions.....decisions.

Well I won't make any today - too much else to concentrate on. I'll have to think about it over the weekend and make my choice on Sunday (when I would start week 2 of KB workout regime).

I think I'll search the forums, or post a thread to see if anyone else finds the exercise undermines their VLCD losses.

 

[Suseka]

So, after some careful thinking I've made my decision to just keep going as I have been, with one exception and that is to sell or find a home for the bars and use only my supplies of soups and porridge.

I really don't want to waste the effort I've put into my fitness regime and will continue with my kettlebell workouts. But I also don't want to waste the Exante products, so I'm just going to have to tough it out and if my losses are low, then so be it.

What might help my psyche is not to weigh myself on a weekly basis and perhaps leave it until the end of the month (Mar), then the end of Apr - by then I'll have used up all my Exante supplies. That way I won't keep getting demotivated by those numbers on the scales.

What I will do is measure my waist, hips, thighs etc - because I am most definitely loosing inches. I know this because I bought a dress from River Island in a size 14 and it was a very comfortable fit (top and bottom).

I did search the site for threads/post on VLCD and exercise, and, like most things some folks found that exercise slowed their WL's' and others weren't affected. So it's obviously different for everyone.

 

[Suseka]

Another lower that average weightloss this week, with 2lb off -but I've rather come to expect that now and its no longer an issue for me. I'm simply glad each week I show a loss and continue with my exercise regime.

I have, however, adjusted my final goal weight (up by 10lbs) as I feel whilst I could probably get to 9 stone (BMI 21.3), staying there would be a challenge. Whereas 10 stone (BMI 23.3) is more reasonable for my age and frame.

Of course, if I do drop below the 10 and sneak into the 9s I'll be more than happy

Once I reach the 11 stone mark I will probably look to come off Exante and (hopefully) lose the last stone on a low carb plan - the way I intend to eat from then on.

Being on Exante has bought my sweet cravings under control, and I can quite happily live without bread and the like. But I have a way to go yet before I can make the switch - so for now I'll carry on as I am.

 

[Caz]

Hey hun, you've not been around in a while... how are you doing? Hope you're still firmly on the Exante wagon but just too busy to be posting on here! Did you get rid of the bars in the end?

You'd be surprised just how much damage something like a galaxy bar can do really, it's all carbs and that's what knocks you out of ketosis and rebuilds your glycogen stores, causing a big gain. That was the one thing that I didn't like about doing a VLCD really, just a small blip can cause a major ripple on the scales. It really doesn't take much. You've also got to remember how much exercise you're doing, that will have an impact as well. Personally, I wouldn't do the exercise that you're doing whilst on a plan like Exante. You're not meant to do much exercise on it because you have such low calories and I think that could be why you're seeing such low losses personally.

Hope you're doing ok chick.