tactical cheating....

Discussion in 'Lighter Life Forum' started by Tygermoth, 1 October 2007 Social URL.

  1. Tygermoth

    Tygermoth Member

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    Hi all,

    i have been LL for three weeks now lost a stone in the first two due third weigh in Tues. Apart from being cold no side effects. except one.

    Sunday morning. I miss my bagel. thats all, no chocolate, no cakes nothing else. one bagel on a sunday while snuggeled in bed with the other half reading or nattering.

    So i was Wondering if i could do a tactical cheat...... ketosis is the king of weight loss right? so if i had carb free bagels from the Dr Atkins shop that should not knock me out ketosis?

    It would also give me something to look forward to as three months of nothing but pack just curls my toes.

    Hope you can help with my query!

    Many thanks

    Tygermoth
     
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  3. sun

    sun Gold Member

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    without seeming harsh, you signed up to LL and abstinence for 100 days.

    Cheating one bagel each week will lead to more nibblings and harder to get back to abstinence

    But of course it is your choice.

    Good luck with whatever your choice
    xx
     
  4. Tygermoth

    Tygermoth Member

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    thanks for the reply

    Many thanks for your reply Sun.

    something to think on, however i know myself very well, the carrot always works better than the stick with me. I'm more likely to persevere if there is something the gee me on. (and no, the weight loss is not enough!! lol) If i get bored with three months of this then will stray from the path.

    Small controlled deviations would be the better option.

    Horses for courses as my mum would say....

    Kind regards

    Tyger
     
  5. scotwannabethin

    scotwannabethin Back to the grindstone!!

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    Well, I have been on LL for 14 weeks now and I would be lying if I said I had stuck to the abstinence. :ashamed0005:
    I went to a dinner dance 10 days ago with the full intention of having some food. I had a couple of Malt whiskeys and dinner which consisted of Roast beef, salmon and some green salad. I stayed away from the starter and the desert along with all the cakes and sweets on offer ( it was a birthday party theme).
    The following morning I restarted with my packs and look on the night as a congratulations for having losing 3 stone. :party0011:
    I am back on the wagon, so to speak and I don't feel that it has done me any harm, if anything it was nice to have just one night of "normality" for a change and I knew that it was a one off.
    I discussed it with my LLC and she was fine about it and just warned me to be careful but as it's my only slip in the 14 weeks then she isn't too bothered.
    I think that my relationship with food is very different from 14 weeks ago and that helped me to stick to what I had intended to do with regard to the cheating.
    I can't imagine having carbs now, in fact it almost scares me a bit :hide: and that is enough to make me stick to what I am doing now as I don't want to "fall off the wagon" until I am ready to come back into the world of food for real and I still have a long way to go.
    I can't advise what is best for you but your control over food and not the other way around is very important. If you can just have that one treat and stick to the program at all other times then I guess that may be what is right for you.
     
  6. Cerulean

    Cerulean Gold Member

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    As I say to so many people who try to “sweeten the cheatin'” - would you have this conversation with your counsellor? Are you asking the question here because you know what his/her answer would be?

    To use addiction therapy speak, we are not here to enable you or justify your actions. Take it from me, the people who succeed, the people on here that get to goal with the minimum of hassle and don't put it back on do not play these games - particularly not so early on.

    My strategy was to see the packs as my treat, they were what I looked forward to - if you think about it, LL doesn't have to make the food into soups and shakes and bars - they could just give us tablets and flavourless powders. LL recognise that you need something to look forward to - and this is it, this is the deal you signed up to. Why are you doing Lighter Life at all if you don't want to do it properly? The simple fact is that it just doesn't work if you don't follow it.

    This isn't Atkins, this is not a diet, this is a way of changing the way you think and feel about food. If you still cling to any part of your old food rituals, you may not get the same results.

    I couldn't have lost 100lbs in 7 months without giving myself a good old bit of stick. The carrot on LL is looking after yourself by treating yourself with non-food treats.

    Ugh - I hate being so 'holier than thou' (it's precisely because my management route has been fraught with lapses that I am so hardline!) and it's your choice - but I would suggest talking this over with your group and counsellor and getting their perspective - they can see you in person and will be able to talk you through this - If the answer you are looking for is ‘Aww go on, have the bagel’, you’re not going to listen to me!
     
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  7. Mrs Lard

    Mrs Lard Silver Member

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    The only thing that I can add, as someone who did cheat, is that, ultimately, you are only cheating yourself. I used to get really annoyed with the "holier than thou" attitude of the non-cheaters but guess what? They were right! So I see where you are coming from and I see where Sarah/Cerulean is coming from!

    I am now in Route to Management and have been to hell and back on this programme, which could have been massively reduced if I had stayed abstinent. I applaud Scotwannabethin's ability to have one meal and leave it at that; I know I couldn't. Once I started straying, it completely messed with my head.

    If you use the carrot and stick analogy, ie rewarding yourself (with food), aren't you using the very behaviour that got you to LighterLife in the first place? If you've ever watched Father Ted, you'll know Mrs Doyle's phrase, "ah, go on, go on, go on"; it's like your chatterbox is urging you to stray.

    Time with your other half doesn't need to include a bagel, gorgeous though you think it might be.

    Only you can make the decision but if you are trying to cheat - tactically - I urge you to think again. And think about why you want to break the rules! One thing's for sure, it won't be about bagels!

    Good luck.

    Mrs Lard xx
     
  8. icemoose

    icemoose The Diet Guy

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    I have to say that experience tells me that Cerulean is 150% right here. The point of LL especially is to step away from food and reevaluate the relationship. Losing the weight is merely part of the process and not the whole thing!! The relationship we all have with food was wrong and needed looking at and hence not sticking to the ethos of the diet in my opinion will lead to problems.

    Loads of people lose weight on Lighterlife and Cambridge as it works, but also lots of people put weight back on after the diets as they just did a diet and not a journey and hence went back to their old selves and the bad relationship with food just started backup again.

    So I am afraid my advice is to stick with LL 110%, throw yourself into the ethos of the diet and ultimately it is phase 2 which is keeping the weight off that matters and to do that you need a mindset that food should NEVER be a carrot (IMO)

    Mike
     
  9. Russiandoll

    Russiandoll Carpe diem

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    Sorry Mike - but that quote had me chuckling.
    I agree with everything you said BTW ... but I'm right with you on your sentiment because whenever I find myself thinking of food, it's never a carrot that's on my mind :D
     
  10. icemoose

    icemoose The Diet Guy

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    LMAO!
     
  11. Goombagirl

    Goombagirl Full Member

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    Hi Tygermoth,

    Well I'm going to echo Cerulean, Mrs L and ice moose. You can choose to have your bagel and you may still lose weight. However IMO you will have massively reduced your chances of succeeding in being a slim, healthy person for the rest of your life (if that is what you really want). The bagel isn't the problem; the thinking is. I'd rather have a carrot than a stick too! I have used similar justifications and excuses - that is why I got fat. Losing weight on LL and CD is relatively straightforward. I followed the programme to the end and am determined to maintain my present shape. I have never had any "eating disorder behaviour", my issues around food are problematic but relatively uncomplicated - I am fortunate to have had an easy life - but let me tell you I find it very hard. I envisage having to be very vigilant for several years before I can rely on my new ways of thinking around food. From reading about other people's journeys it is clear that unless you challenge your old thought patterns you will struggle and jeopardise your chances. VLCDs are not the sort of thing you can do on a regular basis - I think I've heard people describe the first time as your golden time?

    I know I sound harsh but I've been where you are, as most of us have. I want you to succeed and IMHO remaining abstinent, doing your homework, doing thought records, reading around the subject, coming on minimins, reading blogs (especially Mrs Lard's!) will give you the best chance of success.

    Good luck.
     
  12. Madam Mimm

    Madam Mimm Full Member

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    I don't understand why you are happy to pay £66 per week to only half do LL? If you are thinking about how you can "get around" the abstaining, it doesn't sound as though LL is for you!
     
  13. Just Do It

    Just Do It Full Member

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    HI,
    I too echo Cerulean, Mrs Lard, Ice Moose and Goombagirl,

    I have come to look upon one of the LL bars as my 'treat', with a really nice cup of coffee.

    I remember the early days when I really missed food and it was hard, but by the end of about 4 weeks I felt that they were my only foods, I was used to the flavours and I could make my choices from the packs and my treat was to have my favourite pack.

    It really did work and I really really think you should stay abstinent because it makes the whole process so much easier and faster. And the faster you do it the faster you can reintroduce things you like. Although it is surprising how your taste buds change and you end up liking totally different tastes.

    Please keep on with your abstinence.

    Claire
     
  14. megsmum

    megsmum Full Member

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    Me and hubby had brekkie in bed the other morning. I had a coffee and a bar, He had toast, it wasnt what we were eating that was important it was the company. We still chatted and snuggled the food made no difference at all.

    You need to stop thinking a bagel is a treat. The treat is spending a quiet time with a loved one
     
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