The Battle Of the Bulge - week 3!

[Rigby]

You sound so determined to do this, keep it up I understand what it's like to suddenly 'waste' calorie allowance like that, but I found that sort of thing does get easier as you get more into the habit of being careful/sensible, and you learn what foods will best fill you up too.

Hope you had a good swim

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

You sound so determined to do this, keep it up

Hope you had a good swim

thanks hun, i guess i haven't been totally upfront yet about my "real" motivation for losing weight yet, but i can safely say that i have never been as determined to do anything in my life.

and yup! my swim was really good, seemed a lot quieter at the pool tonight which was nice

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

Day 5

not much time to update today. didnt make swimming as my whole body ached so much, felt like it needed a rest, i had a planned rest day tomorrow so ill take that today oinstead and go swimming tomorrow morning instead..

food
yoghurt -119
beans on toast with cheese - 700
blueberries - 60
cherrys - 80
chicken tikka starter - 300
total - 1259 cals

exercise - rest day

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

Day 6

food eaten
fruit smoothie - 125
tomato soup with 3 slices of lightly buttered toast - 700
2 cheese scones - 500
fish pie - 345
total - 1670 :/

exercise
swimming - 1hr 10 mins

feel really proud of myself today as i got up at 7.30am to swim!! first time ever. after my rest day i felt loads better, so now ive been 5 times in 6 days, go me!

1670 cals today which is more than i'd like but i'll make up for it tomorrow by aiming for 1300, and ill be getting up early for swimming again too

hope everyone's having a good weekend

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

Day 7

wow! i've completed my first week! and actually it wasnt as hard as i thought it was gonna be. sure theyre were times i slipped up a little, but all in all i think i did pretty well. today sucked completely because it was TOTM and i was slepping in a ball in bed on painkillers all day long so i couldnt swim, but i havent eaten much either..

food eaten

crisps- quavers - 87
4 fish fingers, 2 slices of bread, over chips and ketchup - 667
big bowl of cereal - 300
total -1054

now im a lil nervous about tomorrow, m not gonna set my heart on a particular number or anything, ANY weight i lose is a step in the right direction. its not a sprint and something im gonna work at for as long as i have to until i get their, but i have worked hard this week, and i will be dissapointed if i havent lost anything *crosses fingers*

ill post my results tomorrow!

 

[minirog]

Hey Bev!

:happy096: Well done on your first week. :happy096:​

Also, may I say well done on such an honest and well written diary (I guess the well written part was a given based on your excellent academic achievements!).

Good luck with your weigh-in. You deserve some success, but remember your achievements this week are the main thing. You can do this and you will.

Kate
x x

p.s. I have a lot of weight to lose myself, so I can empathise with how daunting a big target is, but you can do it!

 

[Shrinking_Bev]

Well done on completing your first week, and a massive well done on all the swimming you have done!

Good luck with your weigh in xxx

 

[minusfour]

You sound like you are doing a great job! I'm so impressed by your ability to pull back from a less than perfect day, and still make something of it. Keep in mind for your weigh in that you might retain a bit of fluid for TTOM, so your next weigh in may reflect the biggish loss that you would normally see this time!

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

week 1 weigh in - lost 7lbs!!!
sw - 22st 6lbs (314lbs)
cw - 21st 13lbs (307lbs)
gw - 10st (140lbs)
left to lose - 167lbs


im absolutely over the moon at that! i'm still in agony with bad stomach cramps but utterly impressed with how well i did this week. i know my second week is gonna show a lot smaller loss on those scales but im sooo motivated right now. i really am gonna do this!!

ooh and i achieved my first mini goal this week - into the 21's!! the 22's are now gone FOREVER

next mini goal: lose 1st before i start my job! so 7lbs more to go in that one in 2 weeks, hope i can do it! *crosses fingers toes etc*

 

[Shrinking_Bev]

Well done on a fab weightloss :clap::clap:

Good luck for next week xxx

 

[Rigby]

Really well done, I'm so pleased for you

 

[Ciara]

well done on the fab weight loss!!!

 

[Ria.]

week 1 weigh in - lost 7lbs!!!
sw - 22st 6lbs (314lbs)
cw - 21st 13lbs (307lbs)
gw - 10st (140lbs)
left to lose - 167lbs


im absolutely over the moon at that! i'm still in agony with bad stomach cramps but utterly impressed with how well i did this week. i know my second week is gonna show a lot smaller loss on those scales but im sooo motivated right now. i really am gonna do this!!

ooh and i achieved my first mini goal this week - into the 21's!! the 22's are now gone FOREVER

next mini goal: lose 1st before i start my job! so 7lbs more to go in that one in 2 weeks, hope i can do it! *crosses fingers toes etc*

Well done babe! fingers crossed for the 7lbs!

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

Day 8

first of all thanks guys! it really is nice to know i have you guys cheering me on every step of the way. all my friends are pretty much at an ideal weight or at least close to it so its nice to know people out their are going through the same thing as me.

well, im actually pretty annoyed atm! i just packed my swimming bag up, drove 15 minutes to the pool and its CLOSED. grr! with being off work i totally forgot that its bank holiday today! so that means ive had 2 days in a row off from swimming, and whats more, i REALLY miss it!tomorrow there is a 10am - 2pm session and i plan on arriving for 10 and swimming for as long as my little legs (or more accurately, large tree trunks) can carry me!

i guess ive been feeling pretty deprived these last few days, because ive been sick with stomach cramps i feel like ive barely been eating. so i decided that today i'd have super healthy day and eat until im satisfied, if that means having a few cals over target, then so be it, as long as i dont binge. my thinking is that if i keep feeling deprived that i'll just end up binging, so its better to eat a lil more one day if i have to! i'll still aim for 1700cals tops which will still leave me with a calorie deficit for the day and then i can have a couple of days eating slightly under to make up for it!

well so far....

calories eaten
banana - 108
2 clementines - 70
onions, red pepper, tomato and basil sauce, pasta, grated cheese -600
honey and walnut yoghurt - 240
blackberries - 40
cottage pie - 445
total - 1503

exercise - pool closed- GRR!!!

 

[minirog]

Well done on your loss. That's a brilliant result arty0049: Keep on going x

 

[minusfour]

Fantastic loss, I'm so pleased for you!

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

Day 9

damn, day 9 already!

just got back from a swim at the pool did 1hr 10 mins today, would have done more but after about 45 mins my right knee started aching a little and although it was just a niggle it didn't get any better so i thought i'd best be on the safe side and not push it too much.

i was thinking while i was swimming about how my life will change when i get to 140lbs... all the things i want to do that i coulldnt do when i was fat like climbing, sailing, canoeing, sky diving, horse riding..you probably dont know this, but even with learning to fly a light aircraft theres a weight limit of 15 stone! also i remember last summer my parents were gonna take me and my boyfriend on holiday with them to spain, and the reason i didnt go is becuase i honestly didnt think i'd fit in the plane seat. thats not what i told them of course, but it was my real reason. being fat has stopped me from living my life for too long. i wont let it stop me anymore.

i guess losing 175lbs isnt just about physical changes, its about the mental ones too, and im glad i've still got a long way to go, because i realise now just how crippling this weight has been, not only to my body, but to my mind.

well, enough deep meaningful stuff for one post...

calories eaten:
2 clementines - 70
apple - 50
cheese and onion crisps - 181
lasagna - 550
tuna, light mayo and lettuce sandwiches - 650
total - 1501 cals

exercise
swimming - 1hr 10 mins

had 4 slices of white bread today in my sandwiches and ive noticed i feel a lil bloated this evening.. gonna try and keep my bread intake down to 2 slices a day for a while and see how that goes.

another swim planned for 11am tomorrow, im hoping my knee feels a lot better so i can swim a little longer.. would be nice to try for 1hr30 mins one day this week, though i doubt i'll manage it if my knee aches..

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

Day 10

today was one of those days i really didnt feel like doing ANYTHING. i just feel really run down and drained i guess. i spent most of the day napping. got a call from new work about some MORE documents i need to bring in, they need to verfiy everything ive been doing for the past 2 years.. so i've been running round to the bank this afternoon getting them to print off statements for the past 2 years and finding my degree certificate.. will go into sheffield tomorrow and take all the documents.. this is the second time i've had to take more stuff in and its getting a tad annoying!

anyways, i have 1.5 weeks left until i start at the new place, determined to lose as much weight as i can in that time and exercise loads. once i start work i guess its just going to make everything seem a lot harder. i cant imagine working a full day, coming home and going out again to the swimming pool in the evening, but thats what i'll have to do.. its gonna eb hard getting the motivation, thats for sure.. until i can afford to join the gym with the swimming pool thats practically open all the time there are only 3 evenings in the week i'll be able to swim once i start work - monday, wed and thursday, but then they have 2 early morning sessions on sat n sun, so i'll try and go to one of those, making it 4 days exercise a week. i definately think that will be enough, as long as i go the days i say i will..

speaking of which, i didnt go swimming at lunch time today so i'm off this evening.. there's a session from 8-9.45 so ill pack my stuff up soon and head off. i guess today i REALLY dont feel like going at all.. i hope once ive been and got back i'll be glad i did though.. i fancy nothing more than ordering a curry and chilling out tbh, well, at least i can chill out when i get in!

as for the curry, i might find out how many calories are actually in a chicken tikka massala and egg fried rice to see if i could actually incorporate it as a treat maybe once a fortnight or something.. i dont want to feel deprived of anything and its one of my fave foods..

calories eaten
chicken salad sandwich - 240
chicken pasta pot - 460
milkybar - 200
ww sausage and mash ready meal - 312
total - 1212

exercise
swimming - 1hr

 

[QueenOfTheDamned]

Day 11

its not nice being fat when its hot like this. this weather is making me feel completely, utterly exhausted. im glad that i have another 10 days until i start work, hopefully it'll be a lot cooler by then.. atm im finding that i'm napping more in the afternoon and i can't really be botheed to do anything. i wonder how different next year will be when i'm around my ideal weight.. im sure i'll be outside making the most of it rather than sitting indoors and complaining.

i'm off swimming at 8pm tonight for an hour, even though out of all the things in the world i want to do right now i'd probably put it down as the least. i really have been struggling to find motivation this week, and its only week 2.. i guess i have a dream of being a skinny minnie, but ive failed SO many times before and put the weight back on that i can't visualise success in my mind. i can't even imagine what it would be like for me to be 140lbs, i cant imagine what it would be like to avoid the mirror when i walk down the stairs, i just can't imagine ever making this work long term..

but then i think that mathematically, so long as i burn more calories than i take in over a long enough period of time that this HAS to work. and despite how messed up my head is, so long as i can keep burning more than i eat i WILL succeed, i might be fat but my body doesnt defy science (yet ).

so in 20 minutes i'll leave for the pool, and ill struggle through an hour of swimming that i dont really want to do, because in the end it WILL be worth it. in a years time i'll be in a totally different place, i'll be close to my ideal weight, hopefully have enough money saved up for a deposit on my own apartment and i'll be about to meet thomas (my dutch best friend) in amsterdam for the very first time and actually get to be with him. i love that man so much, and he feels the same for me, but i wont meet him until i've lost the weight and in one year he finishes uni and maybe, just maybe, some kind of miracle would happen and we could be together. i try not to be too much of a dreamer, but in the end as well as doing this for myself, i'm doing it for love. i knwo thomas would love me for who i am on the inside, but i cant love myself until i'm out of this chamber of fat. i guess ultimately until i can love myself im not ready to truely love anyone else.. my insecurities would only make the other person unhappy. so yeah, i'll do this, for thomas, my dream man and for my future health and happiness..

calories eaten
banana- 108
ww yoghurt - 62
cheese sandwich - 400
pasta, chili tomato sauce, onion, sprinkle of cheese - 560
cereal - 250
total - 1380 cals

exercise
swimming - 1hr

 

[minusfour]

Don't beat yourself up too much- you might not want to do it, you might not feel like doing it, but mostly you are doing it, and that's what is important, what will get you to where you want to go. I think you are doing incredibly well!