This is me...my incredible journey

Well, best fill in a bit more about myself. APPARENTLY, according to these books we get, I should be more aware of myself, find the good within?? Most difficult.

Here it goes. Prior to starting LLT I decided about a year ago to start watching what I was eating and thus cut out snacking between and viewed my dinner plate like a chart: filled 1/2 with salad or veg, 1/4 to potato or rice, and a 1/4 to meat. It works like a charm but it just doesn't tackle the reason behind being overweight in the first place.
I managed to lose almost 4stone this way. Every once in awhile I would get uncontrollable cravings for junk foods and would then binge.
I decided LLT would be the best option after failing miserably with WW, and various others.
My life in all has been a roller coaster ride. I have been both extremely thin (to the point of anorexia) to where I am now...morbid obese. I have been married twice, been a punching bag in one marriage, lost a child at a wee age, and started my life over many,MANY times. I seem to repeat the same lessons over and over and fail to get it right in order to move on.
My goal on here is to find myself, uncover the reasons I do what I do to self destruct so I can begin to love myself (doubtful I ever have in that area) and lose weight. Guess I am at a time in my life where enough is enough, I am in this for ME, and the long haul...not for anyone else in my life.
Tired of being obese and carrying around the burdens of the past - they just don't fit anymore in the life I want and deserve to have.
 
Hi,
Well done on your first weigh in. Thats fantastic. You must be thrilled.

we are started at nearly the same weight and are very similar in goals and height (im 5ft 9 and want to be 11 ish stone). Ive also lost a child :( he was 5 years old. It will be good to see if our weight loss journeys are similar.
xx
 
Day 6


I feel constipated, and Tuesday I did take senekot which worked but, is it normal to, or has anyone experienced unusual side effects? Almost afraid to pass wind incase!

Can't wait for tomorrows weight in - really hoping to see a nice drop!


LOL read my diary and u will see what happened when i farted heheh
 
Hi Dizzy! Still navigating my way around here and posting. I had a read at your journal and yes...we are very similar. It will be VERY interesting to see how we both manage week to week on our goals.
Most of my life I was thin/normal but did get teased at school for being fat (back in the 70's it was cool to look anorexic). My weight then was btwn 130 - 140 and I was the same height as I am now.
I use to ride horses - even owned one! But that was many years ago when I lived on a farm. I do miss riding - such freedom!
Thanks for the congrats on the weigh in; when is yours?
xx
 
Day 7
Almost forgot to post this as I was so excited over shedding the 7lbs!
tsk...tsk.

Okay, breakfast was that nut bar thing - again, not sure if I like them or not but it is still something to exercise my mouth.
Lunch - porridge (scrummy)
Dinner - porridge
8pm - hot chocolate shake made with mint tea

Managed my water intake and am noticing that my fingers are COLD lately.
Took a warm bath to thaw out - and all is right with the world again.

Anyone noticing they are getting plukes? Got a BEAUTY sitting on my chin!
OH..and we had ACTION in the toilet!! It was a 21 gun salute to start followed with ammunition!
 
OMG hilarious toilet description! x
 
i got a couple a spots and a coldsore when first started... My nails are shot to pieces... but my LLC says the body is concentrating on the more important things so nails hair and skin may not get priority xx
 
Great! Senile acne and no nails - here is hoping that the hair on chinny chin chin falls out. :8855:
Just thankful I am not alone. I have some retinol A and guess will start pasting that all over my face; if anything i just may come out looking younger when all this is over.
Onwards and upwards

Week 2
Day 1 (such a good feeling to say....week 2) ;)
Chocolate shake with crushed ice. Discovered my teeth are sensative.:eek:
Lunch - oatmeal
Dinner - Tai chili soup was to start but then discovered there is mushrooms in it. I am allergic to mushrooms. Took some benadryl and all was fine. Soup went down the drain. Since I only had a mouthful, I then reached over and had a Lemon bar. WOW, I like these!!
Later on...you guessed it....OATMEAL.

The O/H and myself went walking today approx 4 miles totalled. The sun was out so figured we would seize this chance, as we don't get this kind of day too often.

Well that was my day, hope everyone else had a SPIFFY day!
xx
 
glad ya had a good day! and hahahaha about the no nails and hair fallin out :D lol
 
Week 2
Day 2
Gosh I hate Mondays! Roll on FRIDAY, better yet...SATURDAY for weigh in and group support.

Morning I had a really thick shake as I forgot to add enough water - not bad!
Lunch was veg soup
Dinner - porridge.
Later tonight I will have a hot choc shake made with mint tea.

Didn't think much about food today and I think this was a first in a long time.
The O/H made his own dinner and I actually was able to be in the same room with him while he ate. I wasn't fussed at all.
Still not into cooking for him just yet, too much temptation as I am one of these "taster" eaters. Perhaps in a few weeks i will attempt cooking. Then again, I really do enjoy not cooking right now - feel like a lady of luxury. Peel me a grape - oops, make that "peel me a toffee bar".
 
Week2
Day 3

This pluke is taking over my face :( I want so badly to POP the darn thing at this point but shall wait for the acid gel to get rid of it.
OH...and i broke a nail today!
On to the days menu

Breakfast - delicious chocolate shake
Lunch - Porridge (would I expect anything else?)
Dinner - Veg soup
8pm - Porridge.
Water intake up to par.

Not hungry, not even thinking of food to be honest.
There was a point towards the end of the day when I got stressed out over a work issue and I passed the vending machine and saw a pack of crisps that called to me. I wanted so badly just to CHEW something!!! Figured this would take away the stress but then took a step back and gave this some deep thought.
I didn't cave in....kept walking back to the office and had some water.
Guess this is insight as to why I eat the wrong things at the wrong time. Story of my life...stress and comfort eat. Now to find the tools to stop this from happening in the future -retrain the brain.

Finding I am getting more energy now. Sleeping much better. But still COLD!!!

Enjoy your evening...i will
 
Hi Weebles,
Well done you. Sounds like you are really focused. Bet your OH is really proud of you.
:)
 
Hey, you did good walking past the vending machine. xx :)
 
Thanks Slenda and TBSX. I am very focused on getting rid of the weight, I just hope this determination stays as I know there is gonna be rough times ahead at some point.
The vending machine .......my old faithful companion. I call him the "precious". He greets me every morning and evening and each time I come out of the loo :( Today precious was out of order, BUT....I did get a smell of someone in the building who went up to the canteen and bought bacon, eggs, beans (a full breakfast) and ate it somewhere in the building! I swear I could smell each and everything they had on their plate including the salt, pepper and sauce. My tummy was growling!

Week2
Day 4

Breakfast - vanilla shake
Lunch - veg soup
Dinner - peanut crunch bar (love em)
8pm - porridge

Up to 3 litres of water a day now:) Night bathroom runs are now down to just twice after I go to bed. SO HAPPY about this! Before i was going almost every hour.
Still remain cold though. Lots of hot baths seem to solve the problem along with O/H heavy work socks at night.
I did sneak a peek on the scales at work -deeelighted with what i saw! Not gonna say a peep on here, as I am gonna hope and pray the scales at weigh in are as nice as these ones were. :)

Off to bed - really tired tonight.
 
You make me giggle with your descriptions, you are so focused its great. Keep it up xx
 
UGH....'the precious" was filled today with all kinds off goodies and what was worse.....SOMEBODY ordered in pizza for their lunch!!
Have people no shame!
Mind you...if a piece of pepperoni had fallen on the floor....nah, never mind. hahahaha
So I wished that pizza person a happy lunch while thinking to myself: i hope they choke.

Week2
Day 5

Breakfast - chocolate shake
Lunch - porridge soup (added too much hot water)
Dinner - veg soup
Snack - toffee bar
Water intake - 3.5litres

Thoughts for today were evil, as you can see. I wondered how long I will enjoy/endure the regular meals of soup and porridge. Shakes are okay, and can drink them no bother. Was thinking of trying the tomato soup again and doing the basil and tabbasco thing to perk it up and somehow get rid of that powdery taste. Can't have mushrooms so that squashes the tai chili and mushroom soup.
Oh to just sleep for the next couple of months and wake up slim.

Anyways, exercise tonight was Wii fit. Did the hula hoop for 10 minutes AND, may I add...not wise to do after taking a senekot in the morning. I swear I have buns of steel from clenching.

Another early night for me.
xx
 
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