I know what you mean. Lately I have been saying the things which HAVE to be said, and its not always ended pretty, but at least it gets it out of my mind and out on the table.
I'm afraid for the time being, the diet is out the window. I'm trying to focus on making myself happier. I'm not resorting to food to do this, but it's not always a priority. Thursday night I had chinese satay chicken (not on skewers, in a sauce with veg), rice and a few chicken wings. Swerved the ribs and prawn crackers. Friday lunch was Burger King, Chicken burger with chips and a diet coke. Friday tea was WM toastie with cheese and baked beans. Also had a Cornetto Enigma. Today I had some of the leftover chinese for an early lunch type thing, then I'm gonna have some WM toast, a Mug shot, and tea is pollock with mashed potato and vegetables. Tomorrow is steak, SW chips, frylighted onions and veg, Monday is.....undecided!
It feels like me and OH hit the 'make or break' stage. Not been together for 10 months yet, but it seemed like it was a case of 'do we want this?', to which the answer from both parties was yes, so on we go! I've told him about the smoking, I've told him about his behaviour when stressed (he turns into a complete and utter impossible arse-hole), and about how stressed, anxious, paranoid and self loathing I have felt recently. He tells me I can't do wrong, but I know I can, and I know how and why I do it, so I have to work on that too
![Smile :) :)](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
It may not have been 10 months yet, but sometimes it feels like we have been through the mill already. I think the two housemoves took it out of us, and made us see each others bad sides.
Personally, I am feeling calmer in my mind. A decision has been made about Hugo. Sadly, he has to go. He has become more aggressive, unreliable and dangerous lately, and, even though it is scary, kids have been mentioned. He is a young dog, not 2 yet. Chances are he will be around for 10+ years yet, and his attention seeking and jealousy is not good at all. We cannot pet the cat without him barking or nipping, and can barely hug each other without him kicking off. This was happening before the kitten arrived, and isn't even aimed at the kitten, so I cannot pin point it to that either
![Frown :( :(](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
Its going to be a sad and hard day when I do that, but I know he will be happier for it.
OH's nan brought us more food this weekend. Bless her, but its always naughty things! No pizza, thank the lord, but we got Friji milkshakes, sausages, baked beans, Ugo panini and steak.
Anyhoo, this is a food diary! There is food mentioned in this post somewhere
![Big Grin :D :D](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)