HannahNewton
Loves to post
Stay strong lovely - and hope you resolve your relationship issues very soon. xx
UmmZakaria's Open & Honest Diary
- Thread starter UmmZakaria
- Start date
slendablenda
Gold Member
Hello UmmZakaria
i''ve just read your post - what a lot of stuff you have going on at the moment.
I don't know what your situation with your husband is, but I do hope you can resolve things. Hopefully he will remember that he's your best friend and Zaki needs him too. Are you able to talk things over. It's the silences that are the killer for everyone isn't it?
There are always 2 sides to every story. There must be a reason why you have the will and determination to lose this weight and take control of your life now. Maybe that's encouraged you to push the boundaries? Maybe it's made him feel less secure?
None of my business hun, but I know that when I did abstinence for a year and lost 12 stone, there were a few times that I became so wrapped up in my journey and the psychology for me that I didn't realise it was having a psychological impact on my husband too! He had never known me slim and he wasn't getting any help to re-adjust! In a lesser way I had a similar difficulty with a couple of my long term girl friends. Luckily all resolved now, but it took some recognition and work on all sides for a while.
Regarding RTM. It sounds as though you are doing well in keeping on track, but that sounds familiar too.
Re-introducing foods is scary. it feels like opening the floodgates doesn't it ? and that all the weight will immediately pile back on so you tend to stick with a few safe things which you know won't do that. It is very tempting to stay in that comfort zone. I think most of us do that at the start.
Abstinence is so strict and rigid that it seems impossible to make
the decisions about what to eat.
Sounds like you are doing the right thing. Look at the recipes, plan what you can adapt so you can all eat similar meals.
My LLC says planning is the key.
"If you fail to plan - you plan to fail"
As for the running- deep respect.
Good luck with it all hun- it must seem a bit overwhelming at the moment. Please let us know how you get on. xx
i''ve just read your post - what a lot of stuff you have going on at the moment.
I don't know what your situation with your husband is, but I do hope you can resolve things. Hopefully he will remember that he's your best friend and Zaki needs him too. Are you able to talk things over. It's the silences that are the killer for everyone isn't it?
There are always 2 sides to every story. There must be a reason why you have the will and determination to lose this weight and take control of your life now. Maybe that's encouraged you to push the boundaries? Maybe it's made him feel less secure?
None of my business hun, but I know that when I did abstinence for a year and lost 12 stone, there were a few times that I became so wrapped up in my journey and the psychology for me that I didn't realise it was having a psychological impact on my husband too! He had never known me slim and he wasn't getting any help to re-adjust! In a lesser way I had a similar difficulty with a couple of my long term girl friends. Luckily all resolved now, but it took some recognition and work on all sides for a while.
Regarding RTM. It sounds as though you are doing well in keeping on track, but that sounds familiar too.
Re-introducing foods is scary. it feels like opening the floodgates doesn't it ? and that all the weight will immediately pile back on so you tend to stick with a few safe things which you know won't do that. It is very tempting to stay in that comfort zone. I think most of us do that at the start.
Abstinence is so strict and rigid that it seems impossible to make
the decisions about what to eat.
Sounds like you are doing the right thing. Look at the recipes, plan what you can adapt so you can all eat similar meals.
My LLC says planning is the key.
"If you fail to plan - you plan to fail"
As for the running- deep respect.
Good luck with it all hun- it must seem a bit overwhelming at the moment. Please let us know how you get on. xx
UmmZakaria
Full Member
Thank you so much for your replies. A lot of what you say SB I hadn't even considered but it really is something to think about. My dh loves the fact I've lost the weight, he keeps going on about it but I do think that my new found confidence must be a bit of a shocker to him and is probably a bit unsettling. He's my absolute world and I really hope we can muddle through this. I'm dealing with a potty training toddler at the moment so will try and write a bit more later 
ALighterlife, thanks for your mail - will reply properly tonight isA xx
Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
ALighterlife, thanks for your mail - will reply properly tonight isA xx
Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
alighterlife
Member
Thank you so much for your replies. A lot of what you say SB I hadn't even considered but it really is something to think about. My dh loves the fact I've lost the weight, he keeps going on about it but I do think that my new found confidence must be a bit of a shocker to him and is probably a bit unsettling. He's my absolute world and I really hope we can muddle through this. I'm dealing with a potty training toddler at the moment so will try and write a bit more later
ALighterlife, thanks for your mail - will reply properly tonight isA xx
Sent from my iPhone using MiniMins
oooh, potty training, I've got that yet to come, just managed to banish the dummy
and some days she wears knickers round the house which she loves, just got to get her to the potty. :d'oh:looking forward to your reply, I'm off to bed now, work tomorrow and I've completed my 4 litres, one more shake to go and 100% abstinence today complete
so you'll get a reply tomorrow IAxx
Gembritney
Silver Member
Well. My hat goes off to u for loosing 6lbs on hols!!! wow! I am going to Turkey on thursday and im really concerned how i will cope...
Im sorry to hear about u and ur husband... im sure u will sort it out. well done once again on ur success and great start on RTM x
Im sorry to hear about u and ur husband... im sure u will sort it out. well done once again on ur success and great start on RTM x
slendablenda
Gold Member
Virtual hug to you to day UmmZ xx
:hug99:
:hug99:
UmmZakaria
Full Member
Thanks for all your lovely messages I have a feeling this post will be a bit of a ramble so hold onto your hats!
First things things, dh and I still aren't speaking but the panicky feeling is subsiding a bit now. I know he is punishing me by giving me the silent treatment but to be honest I'm feeling so ashamed and emotional that I don't think I'm ready for us to sit down and talk yet. I came in from work yesterday to a note just saying that he'd be home to look after Zaki in time for me to go to my LL meeting and £40 to pay for it. It made me cry as although he's angry with me and not speaking to me he is still trying to encourage me with my LL as he knows how important it is to me. I'm just giving him time and God willing we'll sort it soon.
Well last night was my RTM week 4 weigh in and I lost 4lbs! I couldn't believe it I have just been reading through my previous diary entries about how I was thinking to repeat some RTM weeks etc. etc. but hopefully I won't have to as I am now only 3lbs from goal so hopefully if I stick to plan and keep exercising I might be able to shift that by the end of RTM. If I don't then no biggy as I'm learning to maintain my weight and that's invaluable in itself. Last night everyone in the group was buzzing and it was a lovely atmosphere - I've been missing the people from my abstinence group but I felt last night that we kind of gelled a bit better. We were doing a letter to our bodies, the way we did it was by writing an instruction manual for if someone else was to step into our bodies and had to look after it for us. I really enjoyed writing it so hopefully will sit down later, type it up and share it with all you lovely people.
Exercise wise I've been kicking some @ss this week! I did my first C25K run on Saturday morning, then the 2nd one on Monday after work. Because my husband is doing late shifts this week I got up at 5:50 this morning to do my 3rd run before going off to work. I don't think I have felt this smug for a while lol! I left the flat at 6 and walked back through the door at 6:35 to get showered and out the door by 7:20 which we did with no problems. I am noticing the difference already between this morning's run and Saturday's - my face was less scarlett and I sounded less like I was about to keel over and die. On Saturday I was in the lift back up to the flat after my run (I know, I know... the lift!) and there was a girl in there with me. I'm pretty sure she had her finger on the number 9 on her phone ready to call an ambulance for the wheezing red girl! I've been fitting in some 30 Day Shred between runs but I'm still sticking at level 1, I'm just not ready for level 2 yet - eek. I have set myself the goal of being able to do a PROPER press up by the end of July. Just the one. My arms feel so weedy and weak - I can lug a 3 stone toddler around but can't support my own weight on my puney arms yet.
Anyway, I've just finished my lunch and Zaki is sleeping so I am going to try and have an hour's relaxation before this afternoon kicks in. As much as I enjoy mopping up wee and playing with toy cars, I need a bit of a rest first.
Hope you're all well and having a good day xxxx
I have a feeling this post will be a bit of a ramble so hold onto your hats!First things things, dh and I still aren't speaking but the panicky feeling is subsiding a bit now. I know he is punishing me by giving me the silent treatment but to be honest I'm feeling so ashamed and emotional that I don't think I'm ready for us to sit down and talk yet. I came in from work yesterday to a note just saying that he'd be home to look after Zaki in time for me to go to my LL meeting and £40 to pay for it. It made me cry as although he's angry with me and not speaking to me he is still trying to encourage me with my LL as he knows how important it is to me. I'm just giving him time and God willing we'll sort it soon.
Well last night was my RTM week 4 weigh in and I lost 4lbs! I couldn't believe it
I have just been reading through my previous diary entries about how I was thinking to repeat some RTM weeks etc. etc. but hopefully I won't have to as I am now only 3lbs from goal so hopefully if I stick to plan and keep exercising I might be able to shift that by the end of RTM. If I don't then no biggy as I'm learning to maintain my weight and that's invaluable in itself. Last night everyone in the group was buzzing and it was a lovely atmosphere - I've been missing the people from my abstinence group but I felt last night that we kind of gelled a bit better. We were doing a letter to our bodies, the way we did it was by writing an instruction manual for if someone else was to step into our bodies and had to look after it for us. I really enjoyed writing it so hopefully will sit down later, type it up and share it with all you lovely people.Exercise wise I've been kicking some @ss this week! I did my first C25K run on Saturday morning, then the 2nd one on Monday after work. Because my husband is doing late shifts this week I got up at 5:50 this morning to do my 3rd run before going off to work. I don't think I have felt this smug for a while lol! I left the flat at 6 and walked back through the door at 6:35 to get showered and out the door by 7:20 which we did with no problems. I am noticing the difference already between this morning's run and Saturday's - my face was less scarlett and I sounded less like I was about to keel over and die. On Saturday I was in the lift back up to the flat after my run (I know, I know... the lift!) and there was a girl in there with me. I'm pretty sure she had her finger on the number 9 on her phone ready to call an ambulance for the wheezing red girl! I've been fitting in some 30 Day Shred between runs but I'm still sticking at level 1, I'm just not ready for level 2 yet - eek. I have set myself the goal of being able to do a PROPER press up by the end of July. Just the one. My arms feel so weedy and weak - I can lug a 3 stone toddler around but can't support my own weight on my puney arms yet.
Anyway, I've just finished my lunch and Zaki is sleeping so I am going to try and have an hour's relaxation before this afternoon kicks in. As much as I enjoy mopping up wee and playing with toy cars, I need a bit of a rest first.
Hope you're all well and having a good day xxxx
UmmZakaria
Full Member
Instruction Manual for My Body
- My body needs watering regularly - she likes to have drinking water to hand at all times, even at night if she wakes up thirsty
- She likes to be cleaned in the shower at least once a day, please make sure that you give her time to dry in her towel and then slather her in body lotions (preferably Soap & Glory)
- Make sure that you give her plenty of compliments, but only genuine ones because she's no fool. Have a quick look at her in the mirror regularly, it helps her to relax when she knows that she's looking okay
- She is like a car - you can't put petrol into a diesel car, well you can't put junk food into my body. She needs feeding with healthy, tasty food to keep her running smoothly. I've made the mistake with junk food before and she can become very erratic and sluggish
- Please ensure that you take her out of her pyjamas in the morning (and put her something nice) otherwise she gets nothing done and gets grumpy
- Give her time to rest and please make sure that she is in bed by 10:30 as she gets woken very early by the toddler in her life
- Make sure that she doesn't have too much to do at one time, this can be quite overwhelming for her. If you sense her feeling this way then give her some extra rest, a big cuddle and then sit her down to write a list. The panic will soon subside.
- Don't, under any circumstances, focus on (or God forbid, criticise) her Mummy Tummy. She has a beautiful little boy and a wobbly tummy and the odd stretchmark were a small price to pay for such a precious gift. She might need reminding of this every now and then.
- All in all, please treat her as something precious. She has put a lot of time, effort and money... not to mention emotion, into getting to how she is now. Congratulate her on this regularly and tell her over and over how proud you are of her.
Wow that is soo good! Sorry for being nosey but will u be able to tell me how much you weighed before u started your diet and how much you have lost? I am amazed at that your only 3lbs away fro your target as I have 2.5 stones to lose yet and I ain't getting anywer at the mo xoxo
xoxo
HannahNewton
Loves to post
Gosh!! Just looked and realised our starting weights and goal weights are almost the same!! xx
UmmZakaria
Full Member
Wow that is soo good! Sorry for being nosey but will u be able to tell me how much you weighed before u started your diet and how much you have lost? I am amazed at that your only 3lbs away fro your target as I have 2.5 stones to lose yet and I ain't getting anywer at the mo
Not nosey at all! I've lost 3 stone, 12 lbs so far - my goal is to get to 12 stone dead on and then see how the rest of the maintenance programme goes and hopefully find the weight that is best for me to maintain.
Is it SW you're doing? How are you finding it? x
UmmZakaria
Full Member
Hey umm, no I'm not doing slimming world I can't update my ticker as I can't remember the password! But I have been intermit fasting, so that is 2 24hr fasts a week. I've lost 2.5 stones so far but can't seem to budge on the scales at the mo (partly my fault ) don't know wot to do at the mo need to sort my head out again I think xxx
) don't know wot to do at the mo need to sort my head out again I think xxx
