Was walking, got shouted at 'fat b' from a car window today

[miss-r]

Thanks for all the messages, much appreciated. wow i'm clearly not the only one this has happened to, which is a great shame.

I decided to be extra nice to everyone today, I was thinking sometimes people don't always see how their actions/words can affect others. I thought if I am extra nice, it might rub off on someone who might be nice to someone else etc. If everyone was only 10% nicer/more considerate than their usual level, how much nicer it would be. So when I went to the shops etc I was extra polite and nice, (though I hope I am anyway) and I even feel happier myself!!

I think that being bigger/having weight problems has made me a better more understanding person, I think I am more understanding of other peoples problems, especially weight as I have been there, and I always try not to judge a book by its cover.
So for me at least there is at least one positive aspect of having been bigger.

 

[Just Peachy]

Miss R, I find that's true. I too find myself being very compassionate of just about any cause, because I've had my fair share of issues too so I feel for anyone who seems to be struggling with something. Also, when I'm slim, I can really appreciate it then. Those are the only positives I can find.. well eating whatever the hell you want and not caring.. but then I would just feel so horrible that it was probably not worth it.

 

[c2b]

Yep happened to me too. It's not nice. Car full of young so called men. I can think of another name to describe them.
Another time I was in a supermarket and this little tot turned to his mum and said "mum, mum that lady is really fat" Mum's response, "yes she is darling, it's disgusting".

I remember reading a survey that was done on teens. The top of the list in worst thing in the world according to the teens that could happen to them in their lives came out as being fat!! Personally I can think of many far far worse things but I found it really scary.

 

[kazzymc]

as a teen tho its all about image

 

[GalwayMum]

Grrr...that is so horrible.
*******s!
Soon they'll be woo-wooing when they drive by and you can give them the finger.

 

[WelshCake]

That is really nasty but I feel people who do things like that do so to feel better about themselves, I was in a shop a few weeks ago as I went to leave a lady came in with a buggy I went to move out of her way and lightly bumped into a "lady" I was just about to say sorry when she said loudly "watch where you're going you big lump of lard", amazing thing was she was at least 2 sizes bigger than me!! I just smiled at her, it did upset me though

 

[Miss Mango]

Aw hun I just found this thread so am 2 days too late but I'm so sorry that these people have made you feel like this. I don't understand why certain humans seem to get a great pleasure out of hurting another person's feelings like that. Its really insensitive and nasty. Seriously hun some people have no brains at all, I mean - think about it, a car full of stupid lads who are all out to impress their ridiculous friends, the only thing their tiny mind can stretch to is to shout a remark that is heard in playgrounds - how utterly childish and totally unmanly, not to mention pathetic and nasty.

I am getting pretty fed up of nasty individuals in this world with their vile tongues - why can't people be nice and full of respect for another person any more? Why must they always insult and be so nasty about something which cannot be helped?

If the only thing that they can insult you for is your weight then it shows what a lovely person you are. I know its really difficult but try not to take notice and take this as an inspiration to lose more weight, so that nasty minded people cannot automatically send an insult about weight your way. I'm really angry and upset on your behalf - it makes you feel stupid and embarrassed when something like that happens in public.

Honestly they've got the minds of morons.

Sending you huge hugs XXXXXX

 

[Rachel217]

We're too politically correct as a society to make overtly racist remarks in public, so why is a hate comment about weight not also off limits? Imagine the reaction if they substituted "Jewish" or "disabled" or "gay" for "fat"!

(((Big hugs))) to everyone who's experienced this.

 

[EmmyLou30]

It seems fat people are fair game for an insult wheras anything racial etc is off limits - it should all be off limits to those with manners and a sense of decency and it's such a shame so many people have suffered what is essentially bullying.

The other day me and my work colleague were on a traffic island working away quite happily in the centre of town and a car full of lads drove past and shouted 'slags' out the window at us.....quite how two girls in steel toe caps, work trousers, high vis jackets and gloves could be seen in any way as being a slag is beyond me!? You just have to try and ignore them as they're just picking any insult they can find out of their tiny little minds and 'fat' is the easiest. You have to understand that long words are too hard for them

 

[Miss Mango]

You're right there Emmylou. You only have to look at Facebook to see how much intelligence has degenerated amongst some of the younger generation. And I don't mean all of them. I'm talking about the type who drive around in their stupid little souped up cars showing off in front of their unwashed mates.
Thick as pigs poo all of them.

Honestly I've seen more intelligent amoeba's lying at the bottom of slurry pools. They're so thick its beyond comprehension. They have no ordered life and no prospects, they're probably high on drugs or drunk and they'll never make much of themselves so they have to make themselves feel better by driving around shouting insulting things to innocent people out of windows. They really are very pathetic. They'll probably appear on Jeremy Kyle one day with their toothy grins and grubby shirts on

And if I seem harsh there its because I'm angry at the way things are now, are people not aware of manners or respect any more? Aggh! Makes me so angry!!

 

[CatCrazy]

It makes me mad too. I unfortunately live in a high unemployment council estate. The youths round here are about as bad as it gets. They don't have to have a car to drive round in to go insulting people. I myself was called a fat cow (at 11 stone) by a 4 year old! And believe me it gets worse the older they are...when you talk to the police about it its shrugged off as being the youth of today in a council area. Well excuse me, I've been a single mum for the past 10 years, lived here for years and I have never received anything but praise for my kids behaviour. There is no excuse but when the police just shrug it off what hope is there for society.

I'm sorry for what happened to you but you did the right thing by turning the other cheek. You ARE better than them and you should be smug in the knowledge that yes you may be big but you can diet, what hope have they got of being anything more than the dregs of society.

 

[Just Peachy]

I cannot BELIEVE that mother acknowledging that kid's comment about your weight. If she says that, can you imagine all the other crap she tells her child? What on earth is that child going to grow up to be? Now THAT is disgusting.

Otherwise, I don't mean to take their side, but picking on somebody's weight is "fair game" because it's something they can help, whereas race, sexual preference, or what have you, are things that you cannot help. I'm not saying it's right, but that is why people find it acceptable, because it's never been a problem to them and they are ignorant and they think it's easy to fix and people who don't are "disgusting".

 

[fit-by-30]

I just wanted to say that they are in the wrong - certainly not you!

They have seen you now - without knowing the amazing work you've done so far! They saw you for a few seconds and know nothing about you. They have no right to judge and obviously are sad, immature people.

Try not to let it effect the way you're seeing yourself as only you are allowed to judge yourself.

Hope you're soon feeling better xx

 

[Miss Mango]

I cannot BELIEVE that mother acknowledging that kid's comment about your weight. If she says that, can you imagine all the other crap she tells her child? What on earth is that child going to grow up to be? Now THAT is disgusting.

Otherwise, I don't mean to take their side, but picking on somebody's weight is "fair game" because it's something they can help, whereas race, sexual preference, or what have you, are things that you cannot help. I'm not saying it's right, but that is why people find it acceptable, because it's never been a problem to them and they are ignorant and they think it's easy to fix and people who don't are "disgusting".

Well said. Some people's attitudes now are just appalling and its even worse when they get those attitudes to rub off on their little children. No wonder some teens have no respect, its because of parents like the one in this example that they are so cheeky and out of control.

Just makes you so cross doesn't it!

 

[Just Peachy]

It is seriously worrying.. Every week I am appalled at some teen's behaviour I come across on the metro, in the street, wherever. Some of them are plain nasty, so selfish and just into all the wrong things. There's no way on earth that my kids will turn out like that some day, nuh huh!

 

[topdog]

psychology

I always remember when people act mean or stupid it says something about them Remeber that it's not you they have a problem with, it is something within themselves that they don't like or respect.

Regardless sorry to hear they made you feel bad.

 

[gemmm]

I'm sorry that happend to you I had a similar thing happen to me in a pub earlier this week from an off duty member of staff (who oddly enough is overweight himself), calling me a "fat mess" as I walked past him to go the ladies. Like you I was not dressed to get attention or bothering anyone, just having a few drinks with my brother. Even though I gave him a piece of my mind, I was really upset about it for ages afterwards. Then I realised that yes I'm overweight, but I can always slim down, he will always be a loser who puts others down in an atempt to make himself feel better. Same with those idiots who shouted at you.

 

[Batair]

I tend to have the same reaction as Gemmm... if the abuse is about my weight I'll give them a piece of my mind... if they're driving past, I'll give them the finger (unless there's a lil kid withing view). I like conflict and enjoy arguing/fighting with people though. I figure I can lose weight... They can't grow a new personality.

I also get the abuse because my choice of career involves wearing a uniform. I love my job and won't allow my actions to bring the organisation I work for into disrepute. So on the occasions that I'm in uniform in public, I just feign deafness... and just ridicule them in my mind because it makes me feel better.

I heard a good phrase once: Those who matter don't care and those who care don't matter.

 

[Purple_Star]

Got to post this very quick as i've got to go out, Thanks for all the replies and kind words, I felt like I had to share and I feel alot better for doing so and its nice to hear from you all. There are alot of lovely people on here. I nearly went on a binge earlier but i'm glad I didn't, i'm not going to let them get to me!! I feel alot better now. Thanks everyone xxx

I am so glad you didn't let it make you binge hon. Don't let these stupid idiots spoil things for you. Proove them wrong hon, show them you can do it! You are soooo much better than them!

 

[Toots]

Tends to be something lacking in the abuser - tends to be inches

xxx