Westiegirl: Restarted Day 1 Under my Belt!

Sarah....stop being so nasty to yourself!! If anyone else called you a sad b*tch you would probably want to strangle them so be nice to yourself!!

You are not sad, you are adjusting to a new life, it takes time and is not easy (I only moved to IoM 2 years ago...I know wat I am talking about!)

It doesnt matter that you slipped up a bit, just move on and pretend it hasnt happened....you NEED to be nice to yourself hun

I think you should go met P sooner rather than later!!!
 
Sarah - glad you are starting anew on CD tomorrow - that's it new year, new month, new diet and new life!

Put a line under today and before you know it you'll be in ketosis and there will be no stopping you.

As far as lonliness goes and talking to msn friends I know what you mean, I've been there done that - sat infront of a computer every Friday and Saturday night. Do you have any hobbies or interests that can get you out in the evening??? Do you fancy doing a night school class??? - there are language ones starting in our area at the moment. Learn Spanish for holiday type classes.

I was pleased to see you'd joined mse - well done! you may find there is a meet on there arranged that is near you???

Sorry not more helpful ... but just wanted to post something - as I know what it's like to sit at the computer crying - I did it last Friday whilst reading my diary thread!

Take care.
 
Sarah....stop being so nasty to yourself!! If anyone else called you a sad b*tch you would probably want to strangle them so be nice to yourself!!

You are not sad, you are adjusting to a new life, it takes time and is not easy (I only moved to IoM 2 years ago...I know wat I am talking about!)

It doesnt matter that you slipped up a bit, just move on and pretend it hasnt happened....you NEED to be nice to yourself hun

I think you should go met P sooner rather than later!!!

Thanks Karen, I know I need to be nicer to myself. We would never speak to anyone else in the same way we do to ourselves!
I think TOTM isn't helping!
 
Sarah - glad you are starting anew on CD tomorrow - that's it new year, new month, new diet and new life!

Put a line under today and before you know it you'll be in ketosis and there will be no stopping you.

As far as lonliness goes and talking to msn friends I know what you mean, I've been there done that - sat infront of a computer every Friday and Saturday night. Do you have any hobbies or interests that can get you out in the evening??? Do you fancy doing a night school class??? - there are language ones starting in our area at the moment. Learn Spanish for holiday type classes.

I was pleased to see you'd joined mse - well done! you may find there is a meet on there arranged that is near you???

Sorry not more helpful ... but just wanted to post something - as I know what it's like to sit at the computer crying - I did it last Friday whilst reading my diary thread!

Take care.


Thanks Beverley, it means a lot that you posted. I have looked into developing some interests and have spent the last few days phoning about. I am starting pole dancing classes on 6th Feb and funnily enough whilst typing this reply my phone went and it was a lady about yoga classes. I start on Wednesday at 7.30pm.
Someone from mse has emailed me as she is trying to organise a meet at cheshire oaks soon (no date set yet). I've posted that i would like to go and a guy from manchester has expressed an interest in my going too so that we can meet up.

So that's all positive. I am also looking into welsh language classes. It will be something to do but will possibly help me on the job front too.

I guess it just takes time. I am doing something about it but I am such an impatient bugger!
 
Hi sarah... lonliness is crap isn't it? Spent more of the last 2 years of my life feeling lonely than any other time.. it does get easier as you fill your life with things to do. It all takes time, so please, as the others have said., be kind to yourself, give it time.. join something, a class, a group of some sort., whatever makes you laugh, see if there is a club or society that you would like to become involved in.. that way you get out, get a whole new circle of friends and start off with a common interest.. and y'know what.. dare I suggest it.. go to a local church and see if they are lively or dead! lol ;) (its often one or t'other in my experience..lol ;) ) Seriously though.. I'm sure there're lots of places and things going on that you would enjoy and be good at too! Dancing classes? They would be ace for you! You're a right boogy merchant :D

Anyway.. hang on in there, we all love ya and know you can do this and fight off that bluddy CB!! Grr.. just wanna gag her forever!! ;)

Night night xx
 
Hi Sarah,

Hope you are feeling better today...:) ....and I hope all goes well for you as you start a new chapter on CD....

Love Steffi X
 
Day 9 - Day 1 on CD - Yipee Flavour Sensation!!!!

Well here I am, day 1 on CD and Mrs CB is nipping my ear like nobodies business!

I was just about to head off to bed at midnight last night when my phone rang and it was my brother calling to see if I wanted to come down and have a drink with him and his mates. They were all back from the pub and were pretty drunk. He was so sweet to me and apologised for not asking me out because it was a boys night. I told him I knew that and I was glad he had a good time. I spent a few hours partying with the boys. Had a great time although the boys were full of debauchery - sex, drugs and rock n roll *lol*. Even though I wasn't tired I came home at 2.30am when they put on Men & Motors Top 10 Cars and had very in depth conversations about each. Whooosh, straight over my head!

So this morning I didn't wake up until 10.30am. This is not good! My night owl is coming out again and that cannot be a good thing because I will have to start getting up early again eventually.

Forced myself to stay of minimins and msn (well I did have a little conversation with J) and do some job applications. Got about a dozen done and posted. Now I can surf, chat and watch TV guilt free. Not a lot else I can do now!

So first day on CD. I really want to eat - TOTM does that to me. So far I have had 2 packs. Had a toffee walnut pack for breakfast, yum! Then had a broccoli and cheese soup for lunch. OMG what a taste sensation compared to LL! Didn't need to drown it in pepper *lol*. So I have 1 pack left and ooh the choices! I'll wait till later and decide then! I might have to split it in 2 because I've been used to 4 packs on LL and 3 will be a shock to the system!

Well, I think P might have burnt his bridges *lol*. In the last day he's simply not paid me enough attention! From being so keen and pushy, now nothing! I texted him yesterday morning to say hello. He replied about 5pm. So I thought bugger it and didn't reply until about 9pm. Since then nothing - it's his turn and I refuse to text first (oh I'm so grown up). If he has a good excuse, maybe I will talk to him but if not - hard luck!

Besides I'm enjoying my conversations on MSN with J. He seems much more down to earth. He's a trucker and apparantly has room for 2 in his cabin! He seems quite shy and blushes a lot. Rough and ready, that's how I like em *lol*. He's from Wolverhampton so I don't know if he has a brum accent, but *coughs* can't believe I'm going to say this but I hope he's like Adrian Chiles off the tele - I have a soft spot for him (he presents MOTD2 on Sundays and did that programme last week called "What I'd Really Like to Do").

Also N has texted me a couple of times this morning and said I hope I don't mind him chatting me up. Mind? Not a chance!

Well, going to loll about on the sofa for a bit and watch tv, whilst having an animated conversation with Mrs CB!
 
Sarah - good luck on your CD journey hun.... Wipe the slate clean today is a new program and a new opportunity!!!

The cheese and broc soup sounds AMAZING!!!!!! I'm well jealous haha.

Day one again for me.... had a choc shake for brekkie, a thai chilli soup for lunch and at 4pm i'm having a toffee bar. Then need an early soup at 6.30 so i can then start getting ready for my 2nd date with Paul...

Afternoons and evenings are my worst time, could kill for something to eat but it's just not worth it.... i had a long convo with my cb last night driving home from london and i gave into the beeyatch big time, i felt totally worthless by the time i'd stuffed myself silly and now i have to go on a date feeling fat and frumpy!! How stupid am i?!?!

Anyway, stick with it honey.... You know you'll feel fab if you do! Remember your thread title the other day SS = SELF CONFIDENCE and you were soooooo right!
 
Gonna have a zip stitched on MRs CB's gob! Night-mare! lol Doing well Sarah! First few days (as you know) are the worst coz you will still want food.. but once you get into it hon.. its all onwards and downwards !! ;) So glad your bro got you out too.. :D sounds like a fun group. Fingers crossed that J is what you hope. xx
 
Ok, so it's not going so well.....yet!

I'm not going to witter on and moan and complain and put myself down. Since the weekend I've found it hard to SS. Day on, day off. Today has definately been an off day! Today I have eaten mostly chocolate and that's just the way it is. Earlier I felt crap with myself - beat myself up, yada yada yada. No more. The new positive me is moving on. It's TOTM and I always feel rubbish then, I also have a cold with a really BAD cough that is lingering.

I woke up this morning and could not get myself out of bed. It was 11.30am when I dragged myself out and forced myself into the shower. Now that is unlike me! I may not be an early bird but when I wake up I usually get moving pretty quickly. I just have this lethargy about me and I don't like it!

So I forced myself up and about and I decided I need to increase my positivity by adding some structure to my day. So tomorrow is going to be a new start! It may seem sad but I need to regiment my CD experience. I have bought and appointments diary and I am going to plan when I have my packs and by when I will have so much water. The water is what is letting me down at the moment. I am also going to set my alarm and force myself out of bed at a decent hour, it will just get worse and worse if I don't. Good news is that I have a job interview on Friday afternoon. It is for an Office Administrator just a few miles from here. Pay isn't as good as I would like but it might be a start.

Today I also printed off some thought records and I think I will start to use them again. I found them invaluable when I started LL but I just let them drift. It's probably a good idea to use them.

Have spent a bit of time talking to J again on MSN. He is quite funny and is into 4x4ing. He asked me if I wanted to go on safari! There are 4x4 safaris in mid wales in the spring and he said if we are still getting on by then perhaps we could go. He did think I would want seperate rooms but sharing would be cheaper! *lol*. We'll see. It sounds like a dirty weekend but I can go for that *lol*.

Well, gotta go. Wanna start organising my future and then I've got my first yoga class tonight. I'll try and catch up later!
 
hey sarah

i'm starting back on cd tomorrow with all my heart and soul... so we can spur each other on!!!

enjoy ur yoga!

love

Gen xx

ps... dirty safari weekend yum yum yum :D :D :D
 
Thanks guys, for your well wishes. So here I am Day 1 proper of CD.

Last night I had a bit of a clear out, both physically and mentally. Before I went to yoga I went into my kitchen and had a big sort out. First of all I put my leftover packs from LL into a carrier bag. I then collected all my non-fresh food (such as pasta and tins etc) into a box and put the whole lot into the loft. I then took everything out of my fridge - i mean everything! Including ketchup, salad cream and jams that weren't even opened and took them to my mum's. So my fridge is now totally empty.

Next stop was my yoga class. I really enjoyed it. That cleared my mind out. The teacher talked a little about the 8 stages of yoga and focused on Ahimsa - which is non-violence to others as well as oneself. She emphasised the importance of not thinking harmful thoughts about yourself and improving self esteem. She must have have been reading my mind *lol*. So I am definately going back next week. I can't remember the last time I spent 2 hours just focussing on me without any worries! It was nice!

Came home and felt so relaxed. Thought I would get an early night for a change, but ending up talking to P on the phone for about an hour. Umm, how did that happen! My internet connection has been playing up and our msn conversation died. He thought i was ignoring him and vice versa! *lol*. I like him more, the more I talk to him but I like J too. Spending a lot of time on MSN to J and he makes me laugh! Oh dear, what's a girl to do!

Anyway, this morning I do feel renewed. I set my alarm and almost got up at 9am *lol*. Ok, it was more like 9.45am, but that was better than yesterdays 11.30am.

I woke up really hungry but made a cup of hot water, a coffee and grabbed a half litre bottle of water. Not had a pack yet. Saving it till lunchtime. I want to save packs for my danger time of 4ish. Especially as I have less packs to play with than LL. So far, so good.

One of my strategies when I first started LL was to create a wallplanner countdown. It was a chart counting down my 100 days on LL and I would tick each day off. On the chart I had milestones like 1/5th or 1/2th of the way there, as well as major events, such as parties or my first trip to the toon. I am going to do the same this time and stick it on the wall where I can see it! I am going to countdown to the Birmingham meet. I am hoping that I will be at target by then so it gives me something to aim for. Inbetween I have targets for my trip to Amsterdam and starting pole dancing classes, all things to keep me on track. I might also have to plan for a 4x4 safari in March *lol*.

Well, best get a wriggle on! Got to go to the job centre to sign on today as well.
 
Thanks Chelle, I feel much better. I did go through a bad patch last year and I don't know why I turned my back on Minimins at the time - I guess I just needed to take some time out. But I'm back and I'm loving it. I am truly grateful for this wonderful site. This time I will do it!
 
Wow Sarah .... what a difference in you in a few days!! So pleased to read how positive, cheerful and upbeat you sound!
Well done with clearing the cupboards and fridge (bet your mum was pleased too!). Glad you enjoyed the yoga - and your teacher sounds fab.
And all that male attention??? Wow I'll have to guard my "Flirty" title!!! Good for you - enjoy it!
 
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