Westiegirl: Restarted Day 1 Under my Belt!

So far so good today, but hey I've been there before haven't I!

Put my wallchart up and I can see it from my bed. That's what I had in my old flat so hopefully it will provide the same motivation. But in my old flat I didn't have a fridge full of food downstairs! :eek:

I have had a busy couple of days and things are really starting to take shape. Yesterday I booked my train tickets. I move Thursday and come back to Edinburgh on the 29th. Have arranged to meet my LLC that night as well. I return back to Wales on 17th October. I have also booked the train to Essex for the 18th and a hotel for that night in preparation for my interview on the 19th, so I shouldn't be too tired on the day. I come back to Wales straight after the interview on the 19th so come the 20th October I should be back to normal (what's normal?) and I can then concentrate on sorting my flat out! Phew!

The other good thing from yesterday is that the other bridesmaid and myself have pretty much decided on our hen night itinery - bingo in the afternoon, cocktails and a meal in the evening, followed by drinking and dancing. I am still meant to be abstinent then but I think one night won't kill me!

I think so much progess on my plans has meant that there is less on my mind and I am more able to stick to SS and not binge. No binging since Thursday! What a change from the last couple of weeks (OK, the last month) for me, when I was binging every couple of days. Doesn't mean I won't go there again soon, but I'm trying my damndest! Feel different so I hope that this is a longer lasting commitment!

Mind you, I have had milk in my tea today, but I think that's better than 6 chocolate bars (and the rest). Whatever gets me through the first week I suppose!
 
Hey Sarah,

Just caught up on your thread and my what a rollercoaster you are on girl!!!

That ghrelin thing is fascinating and would explain why i'm bingeing since finishing the diet even though i never did so before the diet!! Hmmmm knew there must have been some side effect to this diet as so many of us are bingeing since getting to goal. I haven't read the article yet so will do that as soon as i've finished this message!

Keep focussed honey, don't give up. You're not failing you're just learning how to stay gorgeously slim for the rest of your life - we expected it to be easy - but how can it be when our whole body/hormones/emtions are fighting against us! It's gonna take a strong mind but i think we can do it!

Luv,
 
Well done sarah on breaking the binging cycle, thats a tough thing to do!!! You sound as if you have the bit between your teeth now and are well on the way back to " control".

i have had a fab time in London this weekend and did over indulge but it was lovely and i enjoyed it, before i went i decided that i would not be stepping on the scales when i got back, firstly as i had been ssing the week before so had put my glycogen back on and therefore would see a significant gain which would have flipped me, even though i know its glycogen and also because i wanted to eat freely as i wanted without the dreaded "weightwatchers night before" feeling that you may be familiar with!!

I realise that the scales dont tell the whole story and that the numbers are no longer what i would like to motivate me to eat well, stay slim and fit into my size 12 clothes.
i want to listen more to my body and what it is telling me i need.As when I was SSing i craved veg and fruit, which I can now eat in abundance and enjoy and if I do that and only occasionally eat higher cal foods I should on balance be ok. It is an experiment so lets see how it goes, i would like to trust my body and be kind to it, it dosen't deserve to be abused anymore.

hope today goes well for you.
 
HI Sarah. I loved your Ghrelin - gremlin thing, i'm gonna use that when i get to goal if you dont mind. :)

You sound to be a lot more positive - keep taking those anti d's. i found out the hard way that having them here and there doesn't work - it actually feels worse than before starting them.

keep at it and chin up - just get through the next few weeks and you'll be flying. :)
 
The move is tomorrow and I am in a bad place foodwise and therefore mentally, so I've not been on. :( Been in hiding! Also I have to fight my mum for the use of the computer. She plays solitare to relax. How dare she want to use her own computer, in her own house, when I want to use it! :D

Have been busy packing and there is light at the end of the tunnel - we are mostly sorted. I might get on later but the computer needs to be packed. Probably won't get back until Friday so have a good couple of days everyone and I will be back soon.

This bluddy move has been a long time coming hasn't it. Bet you are all as fed up with hearing about it as I am. I am hoping from tomorrow having my own space will allow me to bring my adult back! She's cowering somewhere in a corner and I haven't heard from her in days, meanwhile the kids are having a riot here in my head! Severe PMT too!

Good news is that I have bought a laptop and it is being delivered Friday. V excited, so there's no excuse for me not keep up to date during my wacky-travel-moving-hennight-wedding-holiday month ahead. Ok, not whilst I'm on holiday, but before then!

Catch up with you all soon. Love to all! :D
 
Hey Sweetie,

Good luck with the move - and hey, you need us most when your adult has gone awol!!!!

Tomorrow is a whole new beginning for you honey, i'm so excited for you. Get those blimmin food demons under control though - you can do it!!!

Look forward to your next update

Luv,
 
The move is tomorrow and I am in a bad place foodwise and therefore mentally, so I've not been on. :( Been in hiding! Also I have to fight my mum for the use of the computer. She plays solitare to relax. How dare she want to use her own computer, in her own house, when I want to use it! :D

Have been busy packing and there is light at the end of the tunnel - we are mostly sorted. I might get on later but the computer needs to be packed. Probably won't get back until Friday so have a good couple of days everyone and I will be back soon.

This bluddy move has been a long time coming hasn't it. Bet you are all as fed up with hearing about it as I am. I am hoping from tomorrow having my own space will allow me to bring my adult back! She's cowering somewhere in a corner and I haven't heard from her in days, meanwhile the kids are having a riot here in my head! Severe PMT too!

Good news is that I have bought a laptop and it is being delivered Friday. V excited, so there's no excuse for me not keep up to date during my wacky-travel-moving-hennight-wedding-holiday month ahead. Ok, not whilst I'm on holiday, but before then!

Catch up with you all soon. Love to all! :D

Hi Sarah,

I think your great!

With all that has been going on you have done fab and I think everything is coming together for you bit by bit, you need to give it time, it is part of the process and your own awareness will bring you through this.

Lucky you with a new lap top...enjoy:)

Love Mini xxx
 
Hi Sarah,
Well weaker folk may have totally crumbled with the pressure you've been under lately! So congratulate yourself on not totally losing the plot you remain aware of your goals which is one of the most important things ..dont ever lose sight of that:)

The best of luck with your move tomorrow and i hope it all goes smoothly:)

Maisie x x
 
Good luck with the move, why dont you lock the kids in the old place and leave them behind!!! HA, Ha, i would if I could!!!!

I am sure your Adult will show up when she feels you have time to hear her,at the moment you dont, so dont worryjust go with the flow!!

All the best in your new home, cant wait to hear all about it.!!
 
Quickie!

Hi guys

I am in Wales and this is just a quickie! This is my new laptop that I am writing this on! Weyhey!!!! I am so chuffed! My brother is such a techno-whizz that I just switched on and because the laptop is wireless enabled the internet just came up without me having to do anything at all! How fantastic is that!

Well there is quite a lot to do on my flat and that is not an exaggeration. I really didn't appreciate the amount of work to do. I spent last night in a room with no carpets and curtains, I have no kitchen or bathroom. I have just the one (building site) of a room to live in. I have taken photos and if I can get them to upload later then I will post so you can see just how bad it is!

The SSing is rubbish, just not been able to do it for days. I have eaten so much sh!te and consequently the scales read a very bad amount this morning! 11stone 6lbs. That is embarrassing to type, which is why I am typing it! It has been a bit of a wake up call so back to SS for me, especially with 2 weeks to the wedding and my holiday. I wonder whether I am too scared to be slim! Can't see any other reason why I would let myself become fat again.

Such mind games!

Must dash - curtains to hang (once Dad has put up my curtain rail), and tidying up to do!

I will catch up later!
 
Hi Sarah

Croeso i cymru !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Congrats on your move! Sounds like you have lots to do to the place though!! When's your kitchen and bathroom finished??

Sorry to hear you've put on weight - so easily done though. Don't beat yourself up babe, can't change whats done but get back on track asap and don't let it get any worse cos you'll just feel even more awful!!

Whenever you feel the urge to eat, come chat on here, there's always someone here to chat to......

I'm aiming for my first weekend without bingeing this weekend, and i'm soooo determined!

I've also signed up for the VFBC on 6 January - booked my room and everyfink!
 
Hi Sarah!

Glad to hear the move went okay! Good luck with the un-packing etc! I just moved on Wednesday (similar!!!) so know what it's like! Anyway, good luck with ssing/eating or whatever you decide to do!

Love Sarah x
 
Sarah
So glad you've got there. And i hope you will be very happy. Will you be able to find another LLC?

And the house will get sorted quickly
Irene xx
 
HAPPY NEW HOME, SARAH!!

It does sound like there's a fair bit to do, but I'm sure you'll make it all lovely and cosy before too long and it'll soon start feeling like your own special place :)

Once you get back into SS'ing again you'll feel far more in control (which is what it's all about really innit?) and it should be so much easier with the wedding to aim for (keep the ex's shocked experession fixed firmly in your mind, honey ;) ). Anyhoo! There is NO WAY you can weigh more than I do (it ain't allowed!) .. so get with the programme sista, and start shedding those lbs again :D

Karen - just a quick message to you too, honey. Good luck for the weekend. I know you, too, can get that control back again and have a great one! See ya in Newcastle! :D

Much love
 
Thanks Sarah, Karen, Irene and Sharon. Still feels like I am on holiday here and it's not quite real that I have moved in permanently.

After yesterday's shock weigh in I have been SSing all day today and have been chugging back the water. Managed to get some semblence of order in my "bedsit" last night so I feel a bit more in control that way. The funny thing is that my "kitchen" is the drawer under my (single) divan bed! How sad is that! My brother laughed when I showed him. It contains my coffee, all my packs and bars, mugs, cutlery and my blender! I guess if I'm SSing I'm quite low maintenance!

The novelty of having a laptop hasn't worn off yet and I spent hours on here last night (as some people might be able to tell from the lateness of the hour of my posts!). This is fab!

Woke up today feeling much more positive and as I said I haven't succumbed to food at all. I was in heaven first thing, sat in bed watching Soccer AM - one of my favourite programmes. I've SO missed having sky. Straight afterwards was the Liverpool match, which I watched on my brother's 42" plasma TV, in high definition. Best of all Liverpool won 3-0. Liverpool FC welcomes Sarah to Wales! Best welcoming present, besides the sun was shining and it's positively tropical here compared to Scotland!

Had a leisurely afternoon, walking down the pier with my mum so she can catch up with her friends who have shops there. It was quite nice other than the fact that I had a MAJOR OMG moment! What have I done? I have left a vibrant city to live with my parents in a small town where I have no life, no job, no friends. How do you make friends with people these days? Scared? - bricking myself more like it *hyperventilates*. Pull yourself together girl! You'll be OK! You've only just moved in, and it's not like you are alone! It will be alright - just give it time!

Keep on SSing and I will feel more in control. Thanks Sharon, that is good advice. My LLC said the same to me last week but I just wasn't capable of doing it then. I'm hoping that this time will be different. I do only have 2 weeks until the wedding - time is running out. OMG, OMG! Breathe!
 
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