Whole life turned upside-down

A plus point of everything that's been going on... a 3lb loss this evening! Wasn't particularly great over the weekend while at my parents' licking my wounds (lots of wine, doughnuts, etc) and then barely eaten since Sunday lunchtime. All seems to have balanced out though.

Still I'd rather still be with my ex and have put on weight than the way things are :(
 
Well, I have the keys to my new place and will be moving in at the weekend! Can't come soon enough, being couped up in the yhouse with my ex is near on unbearable - he's like Jekyl and Hyde, one minute as nice as pie, the next as horrible as you like.

But nearly there now... still upset and hurting lots but at least knowing I have somewhere else to live takes away some of the stress and pressure.
 
Plus, I've also already worked out where my nearest SW group is for when I have moved and I've decided I will join them and start staying for all of class - at least that's one evening I won't be in my little pad all on my lonesome!
 
Hello my dear, this is pretty much the exact same thing that has just happened to me about a month ago now.
I moved from Brighton to Manchester to be with him, we'd been together almost 7 years, living together about 4 and a half years, and he essentially told me he didnt love me anymore either (it's a bit more complicated and a very long story)

So I can totally understand what you're going through, though I may be a couple of weeks further into the process than you are. It really is heart breaking isn't it :( I didnt see it coming at all so it was like a stab in the chest when it happened.

If you want to PM me or anything please do feel free :)

Take care of yourself, that's the most important thing right now. Give yourself a chance to get over it all :)

xXx
 
Can I just mention that it happens to us blokes too! Was with my ex for 20 years (married for last 3 years of relationship). On my 40th birthday she announced that she didn't love me anymore. My life crashed and is part of the reason that I am on this app ad my weight went up. I'm still reconciling why it happened and I think another man turned her eye. She's now living with him. For me, I dud everything wrong - jumped into relationships that were just plain wrong. So just take your time, don't make rash decisions that I did and take each day at a time. I live in Somerset and take myself out for walks with my dog. Best companion I've ever had ! Stay strong though
 
I have to say I agree with you pjstarfish about the dog, luckily I managed to bring the dog with me (she wasnt mine originally she was ex's sisters but we sort of adopted her and she is very much my dog now) and I honestly don't know what I'd do without her, as sad as it may sound she gives me a reason to get up in the morning if only to take her out for a wee!!!
 
Unfortunately I can't have pets in the place that I am moving to. Thankfully my parents have 3 gorgeous cats and I will be heading back to spend the weekend with them roughly once a month, so I can overdose on cat therapy while I'm there!

Hmmm, might see if there are any local animal rescue places near to me that are looking for very part time volunteers! That'd keep me out of trouble!
 
That's a great idea, and I must say you're sounding a lot more positive this week about your future. Maybe you're stronger than you think.

It'll be nice to have a fresh start, new group, and time to yourself to get over this. At the very least you'll be away from the ex's opressive jeckyll and hyde persona.
 
Just reading the thread and just wanted to say hi, hang on in there, and sorry your having to go through this.
On a positive note, there are lots of us that have been through this and while it might not feel like life will get better i promise you it does.
Send big hugs your way x
 
Well, I have moved into the new place... there's stuff everywhere, but what can I expect having moved from a 3 bed house to a 1 bed annex!

Haven't spent any real time there on my own yet as a friend arrived on Friday night, once my larger stuff had already been moved, and left this morning. So tonight is my first proper night on my own. Going to leave it until next week before I go and join my new SW group as I just want to get back home this evenign and start sorting some more stuff out/putting things away properly, and also get some 'me' time where I can curl up on the sofa watching tv.

Everything is still very raw and upsetting, guess that's just going to take time and a lot of tears before it eases.
 
I've been through the same as you hun. I have been struggling with depression for a few years, started to drink too much wine and just felt totally stressed out. In June I took an overdose (not worth it I assure you) and the day after I came out of hospital my husband went to the solicitors to file for a divorce. As you can imagine I was even more depressed after that. I have two children aged 8 years and 5 years and have needed to keep going for them.

I lived with him until the end of August but needed to get out of the house because it was killing me sleeping in separate bedrooms.

I now live in a lovely rented apartment and was so lonely I cried at night at the beginning. A few weeks later now I am now starting to enjoy my time on my own. We share the kids so have them most of the time.

I comfort ate and drank through summer and put on just over a stone. So my journey starts again. I need to build up my life again and start to like myself. I still get moments of sadness craving that TLC but it is getting better. It is still all new for you but please take it from someone who has recently gone through this - Time is a healer - Sending you love and hugs XXXX
 
KK - it's nice to hear you calling the new place 'home' already!!

Just as a thought (and only because you've already expressed concerns about being home alone), why not leave the unpacking and go to your new group tonight? A fresh start, a fresh group, a great start to your new life. My main thought being, if you do the unpacking tonight, it might seem that the rest of the week is stretching out until next week.

HAPPY MONDAY IN YOUR NEW HOME!!!
 
KK - it's nice to hear you calling the new place 'home' already!!

Just as a thought (and only because you've already expressed concerns about being home alone), why not leave the unpacking and go to your new group tonight? A fresh start, a fresh group, a great start to your new life. My main thought being, if you do the unpacking tonight, it might seem that the rest of the week is stretching out until next week.

HAPPY MONDAY IN YOUR NEW HOME!!!

I had it beaten into me by my friend over the weekend - it is now your home therefore you will call it home!

Will see how I feel when I get home about going to group or not. Another reason I was thinking of leaving it until next week is that I am completely exhausted, having not had a decent night's sleep for nearly 3 weeks. I'm hoping a relaxing evening at home, maybe even with a glass of wine, a dvd and an early night will do the trick :)

Thanks hon, happy Monday to everyone else too!
 
Sending Happy New Home wishes, I love my family,but really I'm a closet OCD and the thought of no one else messing up my tidy home is a dream lol x
 
Well, I went to my new group in the end! 5pm class, I finish work at 4.30 so just made it in time for the start. Felt strange being with a different set of people, but a couple of them were really friendly. I guess time will tell :)

Negative point is that I put on 1lb over the last 2 weeks (skipped class last week) but under the circumstances... I think that's a real let off!

And the new place is still a complete tip. Am so tired, all I've done since getting back from class is put food in the oven, have a shower and boot up the computer, check out the forums and my Facebook! Don't think I'll do much tidying this evening now but, got the rest of the week and the weekend to get it all sorted!
 
Hi hope you dont mind me dropping by. Can i just say you are doing so well with all that has happened and i wsh you all the best in your new home nd with your weight loss x x x
 
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