I really want this to be the last ever diet I do. I know what's good for me and what's not but I still find myself making bad choices. After I got my packs today as a 'reward' after weigh in I have eaten 2 bars. I know it will be unlikely to have an overall affect on my weight loss but it concerns me that I am still in the mindset of using food as a kind of reward for success and achieving. It also makes things harder for me at the end of the week as I will only have shakes left..it makes no sense really. I don't think I would do it if I just ordered shakes for the week and no bars but I think i'd be miserable for the week if I did that. The reward paths of my brain are still totally wired up for seeking food rewards. I think it may be because although I have lost weight, I am still very overweight...I have so much weight to lose that buying clothes in the next size down doesn't feel like much of a reward because I am still needing to buy fat lady clothes. I am unable to enjoy getting a haircut as I just stare at myself in the mirror thinking about how fat I still am. Hopefully it will get easy when I get under 20 stone but it's still a long way away. Booking a holiday wont work as I still would feel fat and self conscious travelling. I'm not sure what other than food can bring me a sense of comfort and reward at the moment. I hate how I feel about myself and am worried that it wont go away when i've lost weight as loose skin will probably give me something else to feel bad about. Sorry to be so negative. I should probably be jumping for joy but because I have such a large amount of weight to lose and have never managed to get to a goal weight before I'm not sure I can imagine myself ever getting there.