Yellow Watermelon's Exante Journey

[FullFathom]

Okay. Gosh. I think you might be being just a **little** bit spikier than you really need to be, but that's okay, dieting does that to our moods.

What I was trying to get across, was that perhaps 'one' could possibly afford to be just a bit more positive about the likelihood of successs? It might even make that success more likely if one is able to think of a future where one simply has a healthier lifestyle without food as its focus at all. Perhaps it isn't necessary for 19 out of 20 of us to become be regarded as a freak or junkie for that to be the case? Perhaps eating three healthy meals a day and taking up a regular active past-time is actually plausible?

One fear might be that if one decides that only gym junkies and health freaks can succeed and that 95% of people will get obese again, then not only is that setting a scene and excuse for failure, it's linguistically establishing quite a rigid mindset. It might be continuing a notion that there are fat people and gym people, failures and freaks etc..? A mindset that while certainly benefitting the dieting industry, can still surely be challenged? Hence my challenge.

There's no need for a fact fight here, but I've also read a fair bit about nutrition and dieting. And I too have railed against the seemingly cyclical nature of dieting. And I got very moody and moaned loudly on my diary about the fact some people seem to just take on dieting as a lifestyle in itself. The whole 'we mean it this time', 'this is my time (again)' thing is symptomatic of that, and (hoho!) hard to swallow at times, although if that's fun in itself for some people, then fine I guess.

Some people seem to have been on diets for decades. They have shelves of books that record a modern history of dieting fads. It's making other people a fortune, but not making them thin or happy. This is one route, and it's valid. But just maybe another route might be that if you really want it, then really do it - then move on with a new focus other than what to consume next.

Of course its okay to decide that putting it all back on is simply inevitable, and that an old dog cannot be taught new tricks without becoming a professional puppy etc... But maybe iit is also possible to get to a comfortable weight and stay there by just living more sensibly? I've certainly seen it happen. Perhaps the sweat and tears of many months on magic powder can provide enough time and anguish for some people to realise that they're done with that? And perhaps a more active life without eating obvious crap is not only possible, but actually enjoyable?

Horses for courses, though, natch.

 

[YellowWatermelon]

Okay. Gosh. I think you might be being just a **little** bit spikier than you really need to be, but that's okay, dieting does that to our moods.

What I was trying to get across, was that perhaps 'one' could possibly afford to be just a bit more positive about the likelihood of successs? It might even make that success more likely if one is able to think of a future where one simply has a healthier lifestyle without food as its focus at all. Perhaps it isn't necessary for 19 out of 20 of us to become be regarded as a freak or junkie for that to be the case? Perhaps eating three healthy meals a day and taking up a regular active past-time is actually plausible?

One fear might be that if one decides that only gym junkies and health freaks can succeed and that 95% of people will get obese again, then not only is that setting a scene and excuse for failure, it's linguistically establishing quite a rigid mindset. It might be continuing a notion that there are fat people and gym people, failures and freaks etc..? A mindset that while certainly benefitting the dieting industry, can still surely be challenged? Hence my challenge.

There's no need for a fact fight here, but I've also read a fair bit about nutrition and dieting. And I too have railed against the seemingly cyclical nature of dieting. And I got very moody and moaned loudly on my diary about the fact some people seem to just take on dieting as a lifestyle in itself. The whole 'we mean it this time', 'this is my time (again)' thing is symptomatic of that, and (hoho!) hard to swallow at times, although if that's fun in itself for some people, then fine I guess.

Some people seem to have been on diets for decades. They have shelves of books that record a modern history of dieting fads. It's making other people a fortune, but not making them thin or happy. This is one route, and it's valid. But just maybe another route might be that if you really want it, then really do it - then move on with a new focus other than what to consume next.

Of course its okay to decide that putting it all back on is simply inevitable, and that an old dog cannot be taught new tricks without becoming a professional puppy etc... But maybe iit is also possible to get to a comfortable weight and stay there by just living more sensibly? I've certainly seen it happen. Perhaps the sweat and tears of many months on magic powder can provide enough time and anguish for some people to realise that they're done with that? And perhaps a more active life without eating obvious crap is not only possible, but actually enjoyable?

Horses for courses, though, natch.

If you think that simply being positive and making smaller changes is going to work and keep your weight loss off, go for it. I don't like to delude myself that it's going to be so simple, nor to ignore the evidence that is out there about what works.

And if gas lighting the opinions of others is the way you want to go then please stick to other people's diaries, thanks. I know you pride yourself on being blunt and opinionated, but calling someone's response to your criticisms 'spiky' then putting it down to their weight loss regime's impact on their mood is simply nasty. Please do go away.

 

[YellowWatermelon]

Right...moving back on with my diary, which is what I originally set out to do with this thing.

Since coming home, I've been in desperate shortage of bars, but stupidly left it too late to order the cookies and cream. Having contacted Exante, they're hoping to have them back within a fortnight or so, so I've had to order some others in the meantime. They also seem very low on low sugar shakes just now - only one flavour was available yesterday when I ordered.

I'm still on shakes for breakfast every day - low sugar coconut this morning - and am now having meals for lunch until my replacement order arrives. Last night I was craving something sweet, so I had maple pancakes for dinner, and it hit the spot.

Weight has continued to return to my pre-holiday weight, so I'm now only 100g off. Then it will be back into new territory, which I'm really looking forward to. I'm really happy that I've managed to go on holidays, have some fun bits and pieces, and come back without having a few kilos of weight to deal with. It was all so easy.

I can't remember if I mentioned it, but I brought a whole box of clothes down from the loft about ten days ago, and it was really great to be fitting back into them. Some of the cuts are a little out of date - a bit 2007 or so - but some of them have stood the test of time. I'm wearing a pair of trousers that, while slightly dated, are quite funky and are very comfortable today. There's no way I could have pulled them on a couple of months ago. I still have another box - that's coming down when I get to - or near - goal!

 

[castingnasturtiums]

YellowWatermelon, FullFathom, I just want to say I really appreciate you both. I'm sorry you've ticked each other off at this precise moment but, honestly, I'd kind of rather people were honest and direct enough *to* tick each other off. I mean, obviously I'm not saying we should always be hurting and angering each other, but I sometimes feel (in a weight loss context) an instinct towards supportiveness-for-the-sake-of-supportiveness can be counter productive. For e.g. I don't necessarily want to be told it's okay and I'll be fine if I screw up my plan or whatever. I mean, I don't want to be tarred and feathered either but I think there's a balance to be struck here.

All of which said, this is really emotive stuff and I can totally see where and why you've clashed because I think you're both at ... kind of ... oppositional stages of your journey. Since she's in maintenance probably FF is already dealing (implicitly if not explicitly) with the cultural narrative that insist people who lose weight put it back on - so I can see why she reacted the way she did Watermelon's post. And similarly I can see Watermelon took FF's comments a bit to heart because the diary space is a bit complicated in that it's this weird private/public space where you want to feel safe to air your own nonsense (EDIT: not that I'm saying what you're saying is nonsense! I just mean, say whatever you like, including your bad feelings or whatever freely) without it necessarily coming under fire.

For what it's worth (emotions aside, which is not to say the emotions here aren't valid) I think you both have valid points. Like Watermelon, I feel anxious about the "you'll put it back on" narrative because it is so prevalent and I have, in fact, put it back on in the past. But as I said above I do think that it is not an *inevitable* narrative with the right education and the right attitude. But like FF I do think you have to accept that seriously losing weight *requires* a permanent change: not necessarily to an extreme but then what 'extreme' is means different things to different people. To a lot of people, just counting calories and maintaining an awareness of what you eat is an obsessional extreme. I suspect that will be my life when I lose the weight. For me, it's a lot easier in some ways, psychologically speaking, because I am soooooooo fat that I can look at myself and my previous behaviour and go: okay, Casting, you have a legit eating disorder. And while that's not, err, nice, it has helped me come to terms with the fact taking care of what I eat and what I do with my body will, in fact, have to be part of my life moving forward.

But obviously everyone is different. But I do think it is important to talk about the negative stuff as well as the positive.

tl;dr (am I ever): thank you both for your thoughts. I think you are awesome. Obviously you don't have to kiss 'n' make up because you're both grown ups (and equally strong and outspoken). But I don't think you're as far apart in this as you think you might be. And, hey, this stuff is emotional. Alternatively you can both become allies again in your desire to tell me to STFU

 

[YellowWatermelon]

A good morning this morning! 300g down, so I'm spitting distance from seeing a 6 on the scales (and a 10st something) - so I'm feeling good.

Had my vanilla shake with a shot of coffee in it for breakfast, which is one of my favourites.

My box arrived from Exante - for the first time in a while, it had everything I ordered in it! The new packaging is also nice - looks a lot funkier.

I am getting a little tired of the meals, but thankfully I still really enjoy the sweet and sour noodles. I think it's probably having had proper food - I can handle a bar for lunch, a shake for breakfast, but dinner makes me want to eat something real. And I'm craving pudding afterwards too, which is a bit weird.

Anyhoo, I have a rare day off and I'm going shopping! Gonna buy myself a nice new outfit. Hopefully one that will still fit me in another 6kg time...

 

[#GymBunny]

I couldn’t tell you what the old packaging was. I looked out for exciting designs in my new order but no change so I must have them already. I must say the instructions are clear on these packs compared to SnS which is nice. That said, I still manage to throw the pack in the bin before I’ve looked and have to have a rummage to get it back out to check. 10mls the wrong way with some of these things can be disastrous

Did you get your new outfit?

 

[castingnasturtiums]

Yes, I can't tell what's the new packaging and what's the old because I keep getting a mixture in my boxes? Is the clinical white design the old, and the brightly coloured design the new? In which case, I think I prefer the new except for the fake the coconut shake is almost exactly the same colour as the spag bol

Also: did you get a nice outfit?

I'm still too far from goal to make new clothes worth it, but I wish to shop vicariously with you

 

[YellowWatermelon]

Ok, so I'm back. Just wanted to take a bit of time away as I wasn't having fun with this diary anymore. I've recently been lurking on GymBunny and CastingNasturtiums diaries so I decided to abandon the hypocrisy. I'm going to aim for probably weekly updates rather than the almost-daily ones I was doing before.

A lot has been happening, so here's the update.

1. I'm finally in the 60s/10 stone category. Haven't seen those numbers on my scales since 2009 and, while I still don't feel like I look it, it feel absolutely awesome to have achieved this milestone.
2. It turns out that my basal metabolism must be somewhere around 1200 calories, as I couldn't lose anything when I went for the 1200 plan. I maintained beautifully, but that was it. So, I'm back on man plan - 4 packs a day - for the next 6 weeks and I'm hoping to crack the last stretch. It's not going to be super strict as I have a few events coming up, but it's already working well.
3. My shopping trip a few weeks ago (apologies for ignoring you both GymBunnie and Casting Nasturtiums, I just wasn't up for continuing things for a bit) - was kind of amazing. I was a size 12. M&S was a little too big, some of the bottoms in H&M were too small, but almost everywhere I went, the 14s were too big and the 12s were about right. So, while I can't see it really, that felt like a great achievement. I was never really a size 10 - even when I was slim and sporty in high school, I was still somewhere between 10-12, so being a 12 is a pretty big deal for me.
4. A few recent food updates:
   1. Apple and cinnamon porridge is goopy but fairly tasty - a lot like apple crumble. I made it with about 100-110ml of water rather than 140.
   2. The red bean chilli is surprisingly edible. The beans are hard as rocks and awful, but the 'mince' is ok. It forms a strange shape that looks vaguely reminiscent of mince. I'm not saying it is good, but I thought it would be in the indian curry, spag bol or carbonara category, and I was pleasantly surprised.
   3. The chocolate caramel crunch bar is no longer crunchy. It's kind of soggy. It's a shame, as it was becoming a favourite as I'm fed up with peanut butter and choc coconut. It's still super salty but I kind of like that.
   4. They are still out of cookies and cream bars. Rah.

And, in answer to your questions...

The old packaging is white with photographs. Looks quite clinical and some of the photos don't match what's inside. The new ones are colourful and don't have the photos. I haven't had the colour problem with orders as I cannot stand the spag bol! I also keep my shakes on one side and meals on the other (in the drawer) as I usually have a shake for breakfast and a meal just for dinner.

I did get a nice outfit, thanks. Most of my clothes are navy or black, and I did walk away with a navy maxi dress from H&M (this one - http://www2.hm.com/en_gb/productpage.0630339001.html - don't know where I'm going to wear it, and it's sleeveless which I hate so don't ask why I bought it?!), but then I found a floral dress in bright colours that looks like the things I used to wear but don't now. It's a bit wacky and very bright, and quite lovely. I can't find a link.

I also came very near to buying this one - http://www.oasis-stores.com/gb/clot...ideFeatured=false&start=95&categoryID=dresses
but I chickened out as I don't like sleeveless.

 

[castingnasturtiums]

Hiiiii Watermelon, I'm so glad you're back. Sorry your diary was dragging you down. I agree it's been a bit tense over here recently but I'm really happy to see you again. I think as the diet progresses and you've carved it into a habit, the daily updates and support become less psychologically necessary. I've been updating a lot less myself lately simply because I'm sort of in the middle of things, losing weight and eating diet products, and it's going to be like that for a long while, and nothing really exciting is happening.

But basically: it's your diary. You get to use it however you like.

AND massive congratulations on being a size 12. That is such a fantastic achievement - shopping must feel awesome right now. And I hope you're feeling super proud of yourself. And I love the dress. You should just wear it whenever because you deserve to show off and feel good! Also I could never wear a dress like that (even at a healthy weight) because I'm soooooo short I'd look drowned.

Good news on the red bean chili - I have a packet of this but I haven't dared eat it! I'm going to have it tonight. The thing with beans in diet product, I've found, is to leave the meal for about 5 minutes before you eat it. And that tends to soften them up nicely.

And that is it for my #topbeantips hahaha.

Welcome back again <3

 

[YellowWatermelon]

Hiiiii Watermelon, I'm so glad you're back. Sorry your diary was dragging you down. I agree it's been a bit tense over here recently but I'm really happy to see you again. I think as the diet progresses and you've carved it into a habit, the daily updates and support become less psychologically necessary. I've been updating a lot less myself lately simply because I'm sort of in the middle of things, losing weight and eating diet products, and it's going to be like that for a long while, and nothing really exciting is happening.

But basically: it's your diary. You get to use it however you like.

AND massive congratulations on being a size 12. That is such a fantastic achievement - shopping must feel awesome right now. And I hope you're feeling super proud of yourself. And I love the dress. You should just wear it whenever because you deserve to show off and feel good! Also I could never wear a dress like that (even at a healthy weight) because I'm soooooo short I'd look drowned.

Good news on the red bean chili - I have a packet of this but I haven't dared eat it! I'm going to have it tonight. The thing with beans in diet product, I've found, is to leave the meal for about 5 minutes before you eat it. And that tends to soften them up nicely.

And that is it for my #topbeantips hahaha.

Welcome back again <3

Thanks Nasturtiums! It was your fajita post that really clinched my return - I'll respond to that shortly.

But... with the fajita experience in mind, please keep expectations low low low for the beans. It's still weird, goopy, exante food. I also added a dash of chilli. It's still gross, it's just edible gross rather than inedible gross...

 

[Darcy15]

Congratulations on size 12!!

That’s the size I aspire to

A tip for the chilli is to make it with boiling water, leaving it to stand for a good 10 minutes before microwaving.......softens the beans nicely

 

[#GymBunny]

Welcome back YW. Your diary is for you to do as you wish so don’t ever feel bad about doing anything but what pleases you.

I’m sorry you’ve been left to look at my diary. It’s got to be the most benign thing to read. I’d make it more interesting but there are very few of us to bounce off so it tends to just be my jumbled inner thoughts and trying to reach decisions by repeating the same stuff over and over until something makes sense Apologies to any other long suffering readers out there!

Glad you had a successful shopping trip. I find clothes shops quite irritating these days. I was a firm standard consistent size 12 when a young adult. More recent years at my slimmest I have ranged from a 12 in Karen Millen to a 0 in other high street shops. I even managed to do up a 00 pair of denim shorts but I wouldn’t have worn them out. But this is all craziness. Bring back standard sizing. I don’t care what the number is as long as the fit is good and I do t have to worry about taking multiple sizes of the same thing to the changing rooms - or worse still, buying numerous sizes of the same thing online knowin. I will have to return most if not all of them. Rant over

Casting, good to catch sight of you! Glad you’re still on plan and doing well

On the fajitas, perhaps we lose the crispness YW because we water down too much to get the two? I shan’t worry too much as I’m opting for other things most of the time. I’m rather taken with the gooey chocolate pudding without cooking it - cake batter does me proud on a morning!

Fab suggestion on the chilli Darcy - I have a few of those left so will try it. I add a lot of lazy garlic to my savoury meals. I wish they wouldn’t pickle it in vinegar (will have to go back to more traditional garlic crushing and being less lazy) but it does the job for me. I go the Tabasco route too sometimes.

Have a great weekend

 

[castingnasturtiums]

alert alert: cookies 'n' cream bars are back in stock!!!!

 

[Alecto_on_LCD]

Well. Food week is over. It was lovely to eat food, and I was pretty good with eating loads of low carb vegetables and protein, but I do think it had an impact on my weight. I tended to want more food, I haven't seen ketosis all week, and I expect that I did eat more than I thought I did.

As it is, I've pretty much been swimming around the same weight for a fortnight, which there is no way should be happening given the low calorie intake. So, I'm thinking that the food itself increased my weight, simply because it weighed more than exante stuff does. A lot of things I've read suggest that you gain a good few pounds as soon as you go back onto real food, which makes sense from a simple fibre-in-your-digestive-tract perspective. I'm not going to panic...yet.

So, I'm back on all meals, still man plan / 4 meals a day, and I'm going to be super strict and get back into ketosis as soon as I can.

Oh, and over the weekend I was away with some friends, and I made them all pancakes for breakfast, and I had my maple syrup pancakes from the sachet. It was lovely - I felt like I wasn't missing out on anything at all. Making pancakes for a group is such a faff, but it gave me a proper sunday breakfast for everyone, so it was worth it.

Here we go!

I've been going through this thread...so essentially the logic is low carb for ketosis...but 3 exante meals (just looked at porridge, sweet and sour noodles and mushroom soup) come at 54carbs.. Is that low enough to get a person into ketosis? I also got some of those shakes (there were no light sugar ones available so had no idea they existed until i read your thread) and they're a blooming 14gr sugar. If i have one of those can i still actually reach/stay in ketosis given thw amount of sugar and carbs in the other 2 meals ill be having in one day?

 

[castingnasturtiums]

I've been going through this thread...so essentially the logic is low carb for ketosis...but 3 exante meals (just looked at porridge, sweet and sour noodles and mushroom soup) come at 54carbs.. Is that low enough to get a person into ketosis? I also got some of those shakes (there were no light sugar ones available so had no idea they existed until i read your thread) and they're a blooming 14gr sugar. If i have one of those can i still actually reach/stay in ketosis given thw amount of sugar and carbs in the other 2 meals ill be having in one day?

I know I'm not Watermelon but short answer: yes.

The diet products (whether you do Exante or CWP or anything) are specially formulated to give you the right balance of calories, nutrients and vitamins and minerals to get into and stay in ketosis.

I know it seems to run counter to the amount of carbs you're meant to have on a low carb diet but bear in mind the low carb diet is based around an assumption of consuming actual food. The diet products are, well, products.

You'll be fine!

 

[YellowWatermelon]

alert alert: cookies 'n' cream bars are back in stock!!!!

Where!? What!? Sorry, I haven't been around and I just saw this and I think they're gone ALREADY! I can't find them anywhere. ARGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHHHHH.

 

[castingnasturtiums]

 

[YellowWatermelon]

I've been going through this thread...so essentially the logic is low carb for ketosis...but 3 exante meals (just looked at porridge, sweet and sour noodles and mushroom soup) come at 54carbs.. Is that low enough to get a person into ketosis? I also got some of those shakes (there were no light sugar ones available so had no idea they existed until i read your thread) and they're a blooming 14gr sugar. If i have one of those can i still actually reach/stay in ketosis given thw amount of sugar and carbs in the other 2 meals ill be having in one day?

Yes, as Nasturtiums said, my understanding is that it works that way. It does seem to contradict every other ketosis-based diet that is out there, that quote waaaaaay fewer carbs to get into ketosis. But in practice, it has worked for me. I find I can't stay in ketosis if I eat anything else. Literally anything - like during food week. I'm on four packs a day, so that's about 80 carbs, which doesn't sound like it should work but I've got the sticks and it does - comes and goes though, and I don't have that great rush I had the first time anymore.

I couldn't believe how much sugar is in the normal shakes. I do love the white choc and raspberry and the caramel latte, but they do taste sweet, and I don't really get how three teaspoons of sugar in anything is justifiable! I definitely prefer having the low sugar ones, even if they do taste a bit less creamy and a bit chalkier.

 

[#GymBunny]

How much further do you have left to go YW?

 

[YellowWatermelon]

How much further do you have left to go YW?

Good question Gym Bunny! I'm not sure. Officially, 4kg, but I'm beginning to wonder how long that's going to take. Things are moving very slowly now - it's not like it was at the beginning. I'm losing perhaps half a kilo a week if I'm lucky. It's what always happens, my metabolism seems to slow down once it adjusts to a new eating regime.

I've reached my healthy weight range, which is a pretty major achievement and I'm feeling a million times more like me now that I'm back in size 12 clothes. I still hate photographs of myself though - my arms look enormously chunky!

But, I'm just convinced that once I go off this, the weight is going to come back on, so I want to get down those extra kilos so I have a warning barrier before I get up too high. I don't ever want to weigh more than 70kg or 11 stone again! Even if it's glacially slow, I'm going to stick with exante for now, and I think I'll wean myself off very slowly in future, keeping a few meals a day on it until I have gotten the right kind of diet sorted with real food. How are things with you? I need to visit your diary as I've been offline for a bit lately so I'm out of date!