A quest for the old happy Em

Rooaar, the food monster inside me is growling to be fed. Normally I'll have my alpen bar for breakfast and then my lunch at 12:30. Today I've been fighting the urge to eat ever since the alpen bar! I've finally given in and have a tomato mugshot 'cooking' by the side of me. Hopefully that'll keep me going and is syn free afterall.

Yesterday was a 14.5 syn day with 2xHEXB and no A (I don't seem to use my A unless it's cheese and I've not been having my ryvita to need the cheese). So it was 100% but not as good as I'd hoped. Today I'll be using the A for cheese on my ryvita, my B's for the ryvita and alpen bars and not sure what's for tea yet. Might be making parsnip soup that I can bring to work too for the next couple days.
 
I know 6 in two weeks is good, but life sometimes gets in the way and sends you obstacles, for example we are going to our friend barrie's for tea on Friday and he is an amazing cook, I can hardly turn down having a social life or his cooking, it would seem rude. On the plus side I have to work late on Thursday and have requested a ham only sandwich from the canteen (we only get sandwiches), which will help average out Friday.
 
You still have to live your life Senga, don't worry about the odd meal out. If you're good the rest of the week you won't do much damage so long as you don't go crazy!!

Today, like yesterday, I've been out on site which is all good exercise what with opening hydrants and shovelling mud from holes.....unfortunately it also gives you an appetite. Yesterday I made do with a bag of velvet crunch. Today we were stopping at a bakery for lunch and a naughy little bar of tiffin jumped into my hand and procceeded to drag me across the shop to the lady at the till, and then to make it worse stripped in the van and forced itself upon me!! I felt rather sick afterwards as I'm not used to eating chocolate anymore but it was a very slim piece and I'll be good the rest of the day, promise.

Still no sign of my vouchers in the post but she did say 2 weeks. I just won't believe it till I get them in my hand. New SW mag out tomorrow, how sad that I know that. It'll be something to read on the train to london Saturday :) Hopefully it'll serve as a reminder not to go too crazy while I'm away too. Is that being a little optimistic!? I've already promised myself a Krispy Kreme donut. Aparently I missed some in the office yesterday and my friend said she'd have had to offer me one to be nice even though she knows I'm on a diet so just as well I was out.

Not sure on the plan for tea yet but something low syn!!
 
Oooh, thanks for the reminder about the magazine. I'm travelling next week so will have to grab a copy for the plane. I love the stories and it always gives me a bit of meal inspiration - although I do find that lots of the recipes are from the books I already have, or are only very slightly different from ones that have been in the mag before (I must have seen a dozen chilli recipes!). Always good to refresh my ideas though, especially as I'm not doing very well at the moment! :)
 
Getting the new magazine always sets me in a mood to get back on track - well for a day or two anyway!! I know what you mean about the recipes, you read them and think 'hang on, haven't I already made this once before!?'. The stories are great, I wish they'd do a mag a month though, surely there's enough success stories out there to fill the pages - just look at this website! I hope I remembered the date right or we'll both be disappointed when we go to buy it later.

Last night wasn't exactly the low syn meal I was planning as I suddenly had the urge to hit the shops after work which obviously means tea in Yo Sushi! :whistle: I did go for all the lower syn options though, plenty of soya beans and salad. Yet again the need for new clothes crept up on me and took me by surprise, this time it was bras, not trousers. I think my site work this week reminded me that all the band's sliding up my back and excess cup space wasn't a good look or feel and I desperately needed new ones.

I was very pleased to find 34's now fit perfectly (I was worried my 36's were too big but I wasn't quite as small as a 34 yet), and although that means going up to a more unusual cup size that most styles don't go up to, I could still get my size in enough styles to keep me happy. One was out of stock in the colour I wanted so I'll have to get that one another time but I still have 2 pretty ones to keep me going. It's so much more pleasurable bra shopping these days knowing they cater for big sizes and make them pretty as well as supportive. Bra shopping used to be hell trying on a dozen and finding just one that fitted, and inevitably ending up with the granny bra in just white or black as you had to take what you could get. You pay through the nose for them of course but it's not like you can skimp on them or have an ill fitting one.

My shopping success ended there though as nothing took my fancy, except some Primarni stuff. It's the first time I've been in there since becoming a size 18 so I was looking forward to finally being able to buy more than a bracelet or bag in there.....only to find they now go up to a 20!! Can you believe it, typical. And you can already guess what sizes they had in everything I liked, 8-16 and 20's, no 18's in anything at all. I tried on some 16's thinking I wouldn't even get them over my head but I did get them on. Too tight of course but I knew the 18's would have been perfect so at least I know I can fit into their rather small cut 18's which is still an achievement.



 
Back from a long weekend away.....and I've been a very very bad girl and thrown the diet out of the window!! I think it's still a bit of my head telling me to make the most of eating before heading back to a real class next Tuesday. I haven't been too bad today - although I did finish off my xmas jelly beans to 'get them out of the way', you know how we all tell ourselves that's for the best when there's bad food in the house ;)

I'll sum up my eating over the weekend: just the one all you can eat breakfast at Premier Inn (pretty restrained I thought - had cereal bars the other days), a pizza hut lunch time buffet, a Yo Sushi! (we've come to the conclusion London's are rubbish or at least Finchley is, and the Bayswater one we went to last time we were in London - have to try more to be sure :D), a pizza in Ask, shared a box of 10 Krispy Kreme donuts with my boyfriend and gave Dad two for being our taxi to the station, a few salads from M&S (would have been good if it wasn't for the crisps I had with them!) and delicious brownies in two different museums and one from Greenwich market (soooooo good, all heavy and solid and squishy). So a very sweet toothed weekend which is unusual for me these days, and lots of my favourite food - pizza! Not had that in ages either, or proper crisps. It really was a bit of a food rampage but I think I can pull myself together come Saturday. I say saturday as I'm out for a Harvester tomorrow :D

Not going to kid myself for a moment that all the walking we did burnt even half the calories I ate but I was prepared for the 3lb or more gain every time I stuffed my face knowing I can lose it again and it was a very enjoyable weekend!

The only downer on the weekend was the fruitless hunt for this months magazine! Everywhere still had the old issue or none at all even though the new one was out last Friday supposedly and Slimming World's website says it's out too. I was not a happy bunny as I wanted it for the train. If it's only out in class (I know it comes to class a week earlier than the shops) then I don't think their website which is viewable to all should say it's out if it's not. Rant over, I'm sure I'll get it this weekend....oh actually I'll wait for class on Tuesday as it'll be cheaper :) Then I'll get round to getting a subscription sorted.
 
All I saw in that post was Krispy Kreme...

*drool*

xxx
 
I can see how your focus wandered to those particular two words!! We've only recently got one near us in the centre of Bristol but we don't go very often so they were a bit of a novelty. The valentines heart shaped ones with kreme and jam filling - gorgeous. Should have just got a dozen of those. Who wants a dozen red roses when you can have a dozen heart shaped donuts :D

We're in Bristol for my birthday next Saturday......maybe I deserve a birthday treat right!? I'm out for a chinese buffet so the day will be a write off anyway.
 
I've been thinking a lot about my eating habits while away last weekend and although I've only been back on track for a couple of days I can already feel that I'm actually happy to be eating 'normally' again. SW has become normal to me now and not once while I was away did I finish a meal or a snack and think 'oh I wish I could eat like this again all the time'. Don't get me wrong, pizza is very delicious, as are brownies and donuts but are they really worth it when you consider the calories/syns? Probably not.

I enjoyed being a bit of a piggy and eating all the foods that have been forbidden the last few months. I think I needed to have that and give into the cravings just to remind myself that the odd treat is fine when I really want it, but I can do without eating rubbish on a regular basis quite happily. I'm off out for a meal tonight but can fill up on the salad bar and have already looked up the calories and picked a low calorie option. I don't even fancy the deserts.

I've already spoken to a couple of friends about my few days away and the first thing I spoke about was food - as one of them kindly pointed out to me (in a 'oh my god, is that all you think about woman!' kind of way - at least that's how I took it). That's sad isn't it, that when on a diet food becomes the focus of absolutely every waking moment and thing you do. My boyfriend says that if food and exercise hadn't occupied his every thought when dieting and it hadn't been the most important thing in his life then he probably wouldn't have succeeded - you have to want it that badly to the exclusion of everything else almost. I can see what he means and I do think about food a lot as you have to plan with SW and that means thinking about food! If we could simply switch off our foody thoughts then us fatties would be skinnies wouldn't we? It's a well known fact naturally skinny people don't think of food as anything but fuel and only think about it when they're hungry.

That's why we have these diaries - to share our thoughts with people who understand in a way others don't. Hope you're all still awake after my rather thought filled rambling post ;)
 
Another week, another 0.7lb lost. Not quite sure how that happened - last weekend obviously hasn't caught up with me or maybe I wasn't as naughty as I thought what with all the walking.

Any extra weight that might be lurking will be good tomorrow though as I'm back to proper classes so it'll make my first week's losses appear better (fingers crossed it is a loss of course or I'll be so embarrassed)......I'll wear jeans and not flimsy combat trousers and maybe not make any extra effort to visit the ladies ;-) Desperation or what!?

I am looking forward to being part of a proper class again though and hopefully it'll get my losses moving nicely with a bit of extra motivation. Be nice to see my friend too as she's lost a stone since I saw her last and she only has about another stone to go so I'm expecting it to really show on her. She sounds in shock about losing it so quickly still :)

One of those innocent veg pots for lunch today. 4.5 syns so not too bad but the 9 syn mini square of tiffin I had earlier means that's me done for the day (about an inch square - how can 180 calories be squeezed into that!). Well you can't say no to the big boss' birthday cakes can you ;-)
 
Well wish me luck, I'm off to my first proper fat club class tonight since losing the first three stone going it alone at home. Hopefully it'll help me lose the last 2.5 stone and stay on track to my target :D

Had a 100% day so far with 7 syns for an innocent veg pot so start as I mean to go on!

I'm prepared for the scales to weigh me a lot heavier than at home what with it being the evening and me being fully dressed.....not sure it's the done thing to strip down in class, might take a while to get through everyone at that rate ;-) Hope it's not too much of a shock though.

 
My friend who I was supposed to go with had to stay home with her sick little girl in the end so I had to go it alone which was a bit scary. I didn't even know exactly where the place was, just which street it was at the end of. I found it ok though and followed some young and already very slim girls in who were on their second week (both got their half stone awards last night - don't know where they can lose much more from though!). It felt good to go in alone though like a bit of a confidence boost that I could do it by myself afterall.

I can see what my Auntie meant about the consultant wasting a lot of time over peoples weight changes but I think the rest of the issues she had with her are down to her having a bad memory - I can sympathise with that as mine is shockingly bad! She seems really friendly and nice and that's important too. With the exception of a guy who got his 10.5 stone award last night but still looks to be over 20 stone, a couple of ladies who must be about 18 stone and a woman who was about the size I started at.....I'm the next biggest. I watched them all queuing up from the new member corner waiting for my introduction talk and was thinking 'oh my god, they're all just normal sized or slim already and this is making me feel even fatter when I'd just started to feel I was getting slimmer!'. There never used to be a lot of really big people in my previous class either but most were bigger than I am now.

I weighed in at 13st 8 on her scales....bit different to my clothless morning weigh in of 13st 2.2!! It's just a number though and it's about what I lose each week, my Sunday weigh in is still my official one to me. I didn't even weigh this morning to make myself feel better about seeing a smaller number than in class - that's progress already right!? ;-)

So I'm keeping a proper food diary now rather than just ticking boxes on my spreadsheet (it has my HEXA and HEXB's and 15 syns so I can tick them off as I go). Also I'll be doing the body magic stuff too as that wasn't something SW used to do when I went before.

Day 1....off we go....
 
Well done Emmylou for going to the meeting by yourself. I asked my GP this morning if they had a SW voucher scheme in Hereford and she said that she would find out for me. I must admit that I miss going to class and there is something about being weighed in public that spurs me on! Hope that you find it beneficial. x
 
I haven't gained since xmas but I haven't really lost much either so hopefully going to class will spur me on again as I've already wasted nearly 2 months of the year faffing about.

It was quite easy to get the vouchers once the doctor had found that the scheme even existed, they didn't even weigh me actually just took my word for it on my height and weight and as I was still obese (BMI over 30) I was eligible. I'm only about half a stone away from not being obese so was worried I wouldn't get them but it was ok. Hope you do get them Jane as I'm sure class will help with the motivation.
 
Hi EmmyLou

Hope you don't mind me butting in on your diary?! I have been reading it throughout the day. You really are doing brilliant. I joined SW for the first time 3 weeks ago having always done WW. I have lost 5lbs in the 3 weeks I have been doing it. Although it's a loss, I am disappointed as wanted it to be much more than that. I am one of these who would love a 5/6/7lb loss just once, I'm not gonna be greedy about it, at least that's one thing I'm not being greedy about, but just once, a massive weight loss would really give me a boost.

I am totally sticking to plan 100% and only lost 0.5lb last week. Showed by C my food diary, she doesn't understand why I'm not losing more each week. If she doesn't know, what chance have I got?! Anyway the only thing she suggests is drinking loads of water/juice which I have done yesterday and today (my WI day is Monday night), the only thing is I need to get up in the night to wee! Anyway I'm going to try and fit some exercise in this week, easier said than done, I work full-time, have 2 kids and a hubby who rugby coaches 3 nights a week, takes our Son to rugby training 1 night a week and the other night is my fat class night which doesn't leave much spare time, BUT, I am really going to try and do my dvd 3 times this week and am trying to do Body Magic Bronze. Wish me luck on my journey and I'll keep popping in to see how you're doing.

Keep going honey you're doing brill.

xxxxx;)
 
Yay, another new reader, hi Saddle Bags (such a cool name!). Thanks for the encouragement and helpful advice. I don't drink nearly enough water and so far today I've had one can of diet coke and that's it. I'm not usually that bad though!

I found no matter how long you do it for your body never gets used to large quantities of water (well mine didn't), and having thyroid issues means I need every minute of precious sleep I can get so can't be getting up in the night. I used to drink a lot more and even if it wasn't close to bed time I'd still be up in the night more than once to pee so I cut back on what I drank and I don't get up in the night now. Yesterday I drank 2 glasses of water during class and by the time I got on the scales I was bursting for the loo but decided to weigh first (she does new starters at the end of class for some reason). Anything to gain an advantage on my first weigh in ;-) But I still got up twice in the night because of that even though it was my last drink of the day :-(

I'm definitely going to go for the body magic awards so good luck for yours too!

I know what you mean about the big losses, just once it'd be nice to have one, just once. But a pound a week or occasionally two is my limit. Never had big losses like you see some poeple getting. And sometimes they don't even have a lot to lose which would explain it away, it's infuriating. But you're doing so well already and you will get there, keep at it :) x x
 
I tried those McCain rustic oven chips last night after seeing a few people on here having them and they looked low syn. A new staple freezer item now I think! My boyfriend is currently calorie counting and so won't eat the syn free chips anymore and it's a fuss to make them for just one so I needed an alternative. They were really nice and 2 syns worth (200g) was plenty for a portion with some quorn chicken nuggets and peas. Much less hassle too :D

So one day down after joining class and it was a 10 syn day so a good start. I have some syn free home made parsnip soup for my lunch with ryvita and the usual yoghurt. Finding the hi fi bars I bought in class are as yummy as I remember too - shame you can't have two for a HEXB like the alpen light bars! I'm having to ween myself off having two bars and swapping the second for fruit of some sort mid afternoon. So far I've tried mint and the strawberry yoghurt ones and both were lovely. Onwards and downwards.....
 
Looks good Emmylou. Unfortunatly my surgury couldn't refer me for the slimming world vouchers. Never mind, in some respects I feel like I get more support on this site than I had at class so i will just plod on. Have a good day. x
 
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