Advice About Goals Needed

Discussion in 'Bring your Head Inside and your Body will Follow' started by MissAma, 17 February 2009 Social URL.

  1. MissAma

    MissAma Silver Member

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    Goal Weight:
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    I've posted before to ask people's opinion on whether the mini goals listed in my blog (list in my signature) are attainable and a few of you have been kind enough to tell me they thought it can be done.

    So far so good, 3 goals reached. However, they are reached quite a while before target and they they were the specific ones, after them there are the longer term ones and while I know I set the bar lower so that I am not disappointed, it is becoming counter productive and non-motivating to have them this low.

    So what would you do, successful veterans and fellow future-skinnies? Is revisiting the goals and setting more realistic targets a better idea or should I continue like this simply for the overachieving pang of pleasure obtained from getting there before time? ;)
     
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  3. KD

    KD Gone fishing

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    Ummm. You may think this is crazy, but I had one goal, and it was the same every day. My goals were never weight or size related.

    Day 1 and until I'm ready. Stay 100% on the diet.

    Not saying that I always achieved that goal, but the next day was a chance to reach it again.

    My thinking is that I cannot control my weight. It's impossible. I cannot tell those fat cells not to fill with water when the fat has been squeezed out.

    I can control what I eat though.

    I cannot make myself a certain size. Shop sizes are different, I might not be the shape for this or that. I wouldn't know until I got there.

    I could not even chose a goal weight as I wouldn't know what suited me until I got there. I knew that I would know it then, but not before that moment.

    The only thing I could really 'control' was what I ate..and I knew that the side effect would be weight loss.

    Yes, I rewarded myself when I achieved my goals, but I did so at the time. If I had a difficult week, I may buy myself something as a reward, but again, I wouldn't know until it had happened.

    The trouble with weight targets is that they really are beyond your control. What if you worked really hard at the diet, yet the scales gave disappointing results?

    What if you cheated, but the scales showed a good loss?

    I knew either of those things would throw me off.

    I met many of my goals, and each day I met them I felt so good about it. When I didn't meet them I realised that I didn't have that good feeling. That was enough for me.

    The viewpoint of making control of what I eat vs control of the scales has really helped me during maintenance.

    Sometimes I think it's easy to miss the forest for the trees IYKWIM;)

    Anyway, that's how I did it, but obviously we find our motivation on different streets.
     
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  4. MissAma

    MissAma Silver Member

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    Current Weight:
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    Goal Weight:
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    Lost(%):
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    Diet:
    Cambridge Diet/ SnS
    That was lovely KD and thank you so very much for taking the time to write it! It makes perfect sense and is indeed, not a point of view people think about often either!

    I have though, been doing some soul searching on the issue. Not loads, it would make me dwell too much on it and obsessing is not good but intuitively enough to know that I need goals. Clear cut, waiting to be grabbed. I know it's nothing to count on and I know sometimes it will be very counter productive when they are not reached but till then I find they are sometimes the only thing that keeps me going!

    The thought of cheating is made less appealing thanks to the goals, the huge task ahead is less daunting, etc. I'm very much a list person, I repeat things obsessively to myself to measure achievements in milestones and reassure myself that it's going well and in the desired direction. If you wish, a Rainman of lists :)

    I know I will need them, I'm just asking if it isn't wiser to break that "by end of 12 weeks of SS such and such" one into smaller ones that would be more realistic and more manageable. In a sense, your answer answers it....... if I am this convinced I need goals then I had better do them properly, I suppose.

    However, I would like to say that for the stronger of us (and KD you're nothing if not strong and beautiful!) the 100% every day and then one day at a time philosophy, coupled with recognizing that it's the food or lack thereof that we have control on, not the scales, is the way to go and the healthy alternative to goals and obsessing about number of centimeters!
     
  5. biltsy

    biltsy Peggy McParrot

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    Hi missama

    i like goals, small ones and i'll add new ones when i've reached the ones on my signature...and i'll remove the ones i've done.....but my main goal is to lose weight, however long it takes, and to keep my inch loss record....as long as i lose weight or inches i'll be happy.

    xx biltsy xx
     
  6. Kaitlyn

    Kaitlyn Full Member

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    I think whether or not the goals should eb changed depends on you.

    If you need the motivation of goals which are difficult but achievable, then perhaps you should revise them (making sure that they don't go the other way and disappoint you).

    However, if knowing that achieving your goals early gives you enough pleasure, and therefore motivation, to achieve your goals, then perhaps you should just leave them as they are.
     
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