Angie-bum's getting gorgeous slim and save daily diary

[angie-bum]

Thank you biggus, had a better day today, ate my packs later and stuck with the plan. I know I could have done something else, made a video diary, drank more fluid, thumped a pillow, but food is immediate and gives near instant relief. My toddler/ teenager within demanded food and comfort and I fed it.

Next time I am upset I will try out another coping strategy. Unfortunately food gives me almost instant calm. Maybe it's realising acute emotions are not actually painful, they are just uncomfortable and they will pass!

 

[angie-bum]

12thSept

Another okay day. Am sticking to my packs water and meat. Am on track

I look passable in my mirror at home, but went to Tesco to get smarter work clothes. Yuck! Their lighting in the changing rooms suck :-( but it did give me a wake up call that I am indeed 14.7, not 12 stone & I indeed need to lose 2 and a half stone & I'm not out of the woods yet. That has been a problem before, losing 2 stones having complements and getting complacent.

It never feels quick enough but it is! I've only been on it 6 weeks I know I have at least another stone / another month or so to start looking ' not fat'.

So glad I decided not to weigh through this journey. I've had the pattern before of thinking I look good after losing weight and changing room mirrors saying different, then getting weighed to find out I'm heavier than I thought. None of it is helpful!!

So I look okay in my home mirror
i know I have lost a lot of weight, but I had a lot of weight to lose and there's 2 if not 3 months til i'm done here.

i am despondent I let myself get so big again, and i have to acknowledge that emotion, i feel i let myself down and i am worth more than that.

The difference is that now I really know I can do it. I will carry on til Christmas then do up and down days like hubby. Obviously if we are doing the same routine it will help. Also looking at the intermittant fasting documentary I realise I got it right all along. I used to miss breakfast eat few sweets and little in the way of pasta, concentrating on meat and salad the odd yogurt and almost no cake.. But I followed the diet advice of the 80s and 90s eat pasta, keep off the fat, eat a little of what u fancy, no food excluded! Well actually I am far better off without carbs for breakfast. I like my protein, fats and low carb veg. I'm going to have to devise a plan that reflects that, whilst being aware of vitamin content. The paelo diet looks interesting.

Eating like a cave woman and realising I will always find the combination of white flour, fat and sugar utterly irresistible.
i won't say I won't have them again, but they are going to have to be a rare treat, not the daily event they used to be.

Anyway, I am sad today I ever got so big. I am also hopeful that I will pass through this fatness quite quickly, though I know the time will drag. In some ways it is also my saving grace. I need some time to contemplate what I need to do to maintain. Because I will maintain, not because I don't want to spend money and months on the shakes, I want to be slim for life and I want to eat yummy meat fat and veg. I do not want to ever get back on the empty calorie carrousel.

Anyway, need to drink more, so will pop off and get another herbal tea

 

[angie-bum]

15th September.
Nothing much to add, I'm well established in this way of eating.
have had today half a pack of spicy spagettie mixed with a cm of chorizo, a thumb of courgette and 2 mushrooms and a couple of shakes of parmesan, followed by half a choc maple bar and half a crispy choc shake mixed to a runny pate and a drop of almond essence (not bad a bit strong, will only add if getting bored)

Then lots of herbal teas till evening then half spagettie mixed with leeks and mushrooms Parmesan and a few turkey strips

Followed by rest of maple bar and crispy choc pudding with orange essence.

Yummy.

Hubby is having an up day tomorrow, so evening meal will be salmon. Nom nom nom!
not sure what meal pack to have yet, but it might be spaghettie again as I enjoyed today.

Theres nothing much more to add. Walked quite a lot today and find I can now climb hills quite easily. Wish to do more exercise though I can't quite make myself do it.

Ive done 1 Callenetics workout, need to work out when best to do it. Anyway not much to add.
Neck hurts like hell. It sometimes does when I'm coming down with something. I hope my body is better able to deal with **** than it as been lately. Feel generally healthier. Just need to get more bloody sleep

 

[angie-bum]

Well I am wearing my suede jeans as they are comfy and do up with no chance of popping the poppers I also know if I don't wear them now I will be out of them in a month. My body is def coming back, tummy a bit floppy but shrink inking. Neck and legs thinner but still thick pad of fat on thighs.

If I was using the scales I expect I'd be under 14.7 but I will not be weighing myself until at least my birthday, if then. In fact I don't think I will weigh til Christmas, because I know if I have a wobble over my birthday and I am near 13 I will buckle. So I won't do that. I need to get down to 12 stone at least and until my trousers and mirror say I've lost enough I won't stop. Then I need to go down a bit to have some contingency/ hormonal pounds. Have been 11.7 before and it looked fine

Anyway the diet is fine, its coming off quick enough that I can see, but not so quick it freaks me out.

Its all good. On my second cup of mint tea which settles my tummy. Happy and settled on the diet

 

[RebekahR]

Good news on the trousers

Masaging with lots of lovely oil helps with the skin for sure

Your doing great, don't think I could go 7 hours without weighing LOL your a brave lady!!

Keep up the good work Xx

 

[angie-bum]

Hi there RebekahR! I have always weighed before with other diets, but it's destroyed my diet before, its okay when yr losing, but my weightloss tends to be highly erratic even when I've stuck ridgedly to plan. Also if I'm losing well I have a tendency to let myself off the hook, that has lead me to cheat and then give up completely til all the weight has come back on. Conversely, if the scales say I'm not losing or have put on, it destroys me, I get really upset and give up.

Id love to know what I weigh! But it's hurt my progress on a diet so many times. This time I'm not going to do it.

I stopped weighing after week 2. I lost 10lb the first week then 4 the next but put on the following week, whilst sticking to the plan. I stopped weighing then. My weight loss felt it stalled for at least 10 days & then it completely fell off me
Ive been shrinking ever since. Some days I see my reflection I am pleased, so days I'm acutely aware I have at least another 2-3 stones to lose, but at least it's no longer 5-6 stones!

 

[angie-bum]

I feel my weight loss has stalled though I can see a lot has come off. I suppose I am in the middle ground, not huuuuuge but not skinny either. I can't even really work out what weight I am by looking in the mirror. My jeans say around 14 stone if not a few pounds more. But my face says higher :-(

id love to know but I know weighing ultimately gives me no comfort....unless it tells me lies and says I'm at goal!
well anyway, it's not making me give up. I realise I'm probably in for a whoosh & a big loss this or next week.

been on the diet for 7 weeks. Have got another 6 weeks til my birthday, oh to be in my skinny jeans again. Goal by Christmas

ate today half mac cheese with mushrooms and some ham and leeks. Then half a bar half a crispy sshake later today had half a cottage pie mixed up to be like mash, with stewed beef leeks and sprouts. Was yummy. Followed by obligatory crispy shake pudding and other half of bar. Nom nom nommity nom

 

[biggusburdus]

I feel my weight loss has stalled though I can see a lot has come off. I suppose I am in the middle ground, not huuuuuge but not skinny either. I can't even really work out what weight I am by looking in the mirror. My jeans say around 14 stone if not a few pounds more. But my face says higher :-(

id love to know but I know weighing ultimately gives me no comfort....unless it tells me lies and says I'm at goal!
well anyway, it's not making me give up. I realise I'm probably in for a whoosh & a big loss this or next week.

been on the diet for 7 weeks. Have got another 6 weeks til my birthday, oh to be in my skinny jeans again. Goal by Christmas

ate today half mac cheese with mushrooms and some ham and leeks. Then half a bar half a crispy sshake later today had half a cottage pie mixed up to be like mash, with stewed beef leeks and sprouts. Was yummy. Followed by obligatory crispy shake pudding and other half of bar. Nom nom nommity nom

You are doing great!

Sent from my iPad using MiniMins

 

[Hamish's Mum]

The issues you have with what the scales tell you is the same as me, and I often sabatoge myself when I am doing well or become so down when I have been 100% and gained. That is why weighing at SW each week was just no good for me.

I couldn't not weigh though, I am just not that brave, but will aim for weighing weekly every saturday. Did have a sneaky weigh in after 4 days which told me I had lost, initially I was pleased and then I just stress myself out that it will go up again by weigh in day. Just so not worth the emotional stress it causes.

I am quite excited to find out what you have lost though, bet you will be surprised, and moving down clothes sizes should give you an indication too

 

[angie-bum]

Hi Hamish's mum and biggus birdus! Thanks for stopping by.

Been thinking about why things have worked thistime.

Not actually weighed for 6 weeks. After trying and stalling several on a vlcd many times over the last 2 years I realised reading the scales had prompted me to cheat or had made me doubt doing a vlcd.

the weights I have put down are my estimations based on best guesses. Today I look significantly thinner than yesterday. But if I had got on the scales yesterday I'd have had it confirmed I'd put on and I'd have looked fat, felt fat and consoled myself with a cheat. Knowing that's what I do, I didn't ask hubby to take the scales out of hiding.

i reckon the most important thing I can do is follow the diet pretty strictly and do what I must to stay in the zone psychologically ( no big disappointments scales wise, no feeling smug and content/ complacent) and physically (stay in ketosis no matter what). Being strict and being in the zone is more important than knowing my weight.

but I really want to know what I weigh! I want to be able to celebrate getting to goal at Christmas more. I really would like to be able to celebrate 3-4 lb a week losses and take part in Christmas countdowns.
but I have lost the same 2 stone with a vlcd at least 5 times in the last 2 years. So even though I've been on the diet 7 weeks I am not going to be complacent and I will not underestimate my ability to muck up, even when doing well.
i was at the same point 2 years ago. Visited a friend with my then baby. My friend bought me a cake cut it up in bits and put it in my lap. I thought I could have a bit. I couldn't. It derailed me for that year. Then I started again and after 2 stone people said I looked good and I got complacent thinking I could lose the rest with healthy eating. I didn't.

then I lost 2 stone at the beginning of the year. Was doing well but then went to 2 toddler parties one week after another. First week I was okay then the next I ate all the cake (there was half a dozen types!)

so I want to know what I weigh. But I can't. Will just have to be content with getting into size 16s

 

[night-owl]

You really are going to do it this time! You are so on track! You know exactly what it takes and how to do it. Just take it nice and steady and don't look down (at the scales!). It is so great that you have learned from your mistakes and know all the pitfalls and know yourself so well. Your clothes, and how you look and feel, are a much better measure than the scales which can fluctuate so much, as you know, even in one day.

You really are Queen of the Half Packs aren't you! It's a great idea and I can see why you do it as you are always able to have a couple of courses, a bit of variety, and a "pudding". How do you make the crispy shake pudding? Did try the S&S Chocolate Crispy shake once and it wasn't bad. Do you just use mousse powder from CD or one of the other diets?

Stick at it, and you are going to have a wonderful Christmas present this year! Maybe hubby will wrap up the scales and put them under the tree!

 

[angie-bum]

Hi Frances! Yep, I'm the half pack queen I find having so much variety fools me into thinking I'm not doing a vlcd and I don't feel hard done by.

i make half a crispy shake up with a half teaspoon of orange essence half a teaspoon of cocoa and make it to a runny paste in a ramekin. I've run out of s&s bars but I'd got a load of Tesco ultra slim in stock, so I chop up a quarter of one of them into small pieces and mix it in. It is gorgeous being an old hand I know what cheats I can get away with. I also have ham and beef in my main meals Yum yum yum!
The scales lies, my mirror lies, my clothes lie. Yesterday evening I looked a stone heavier than this am. Today I'd guess I'm nearer 14 than 14.7, so only another half stone and ill be properly in my skinny jeans. I got them on this am
but I'm still carrying weight on my thighs, but everything shrank this am, tummy & face look thinner, thighs bait ththinner god I love this diet

have just had ham mushroom and courgettes in macaroni cheese. Followed by a bannanna shake turned into pudding (bleugh will make the rest into a shake as taste too strong).

so today I am happy with my figure its all good

 

[RebekahR]

Your going grand hunny

Agree Om the banana its very strong I always do it as a slightly ling shake

Keep up the fantastic work xxx

 

[angie-bum]

didn't eat the rest of the banana shake, too strong for my ttaste buds

had a good result today. Able to wear fitted top, tighter jeans and bothered to wear make up. Looked okay. Then spent 2 and a half hours surrounded by screaming children and half a dozen types of cake, crisps and chocolate and didn't buckle...yay me

It still bugs me that I don't know my weight. It could easily be remedied, but to what end? If the scales said I was 13.13 I'd think I'd lost too fast. I would also say yay 13 something & then get ahead of myself. If I was nearer 14.4 I'd think I wasn't losing it quick enough & panic it never feels quick enough

so just trying to eat the food and not think about it too much.

anyway, yay to me the toddler party did not upset the diet this time.

i have now managed 3 birthday parties this month without stuffing up. I'm not complacent. I still have my own birthday then all of December to negotiate. Plod plod, one foot in front of the other

 

[RebekahR]

Your doing grand hun, seriously the only time I don't weigh myself is when I'm at work!!! If I'm home I'm on it every wee!! Your so brave!!

Good stuff surviving toddlers party LOL

Xx

 

[angie-bum]

It. Was. Hell! Lol

 

[RebekahR]

LOL I can imagine!!!

I try to avoid being anywhere near cupcakes, haribo or toddlers!!

 

[night-owl]

Cupcakes would be hard I admit......but then I know most of the ones I have tried look better than they actually taste. Just not worth it. Continue to rise above it! Like the way you say, you were able to get into skinnier jeans! I only have one pair and I chucked them last week as they were so well-loved and worn they had ripped. Going to go without until I've lost a bit of weight.

Thanks for the pudding recipe....gonna get some essence and try it. Just one last thing, do you just eat it as a paste? What about giving it a quick 10-20 sec whizz in the microwave. Just think with winter coming it would be nice, and more pudding-like if warm.....and it would also give the bar a bit of a melt?!!!

There is no such thing as losing weight too fast in my book and yes, it never feels that it is fast enough, especially when you start looking very couple of days. On balance, I am beginning to think it is probably more realistic to weigh yourself monthly. That way, sufficient time will have passed to give you a decent loss, and yet the monthly rule will mean that it won't put you off track the way it can? Just an idea?

 

[tigerlily80]

Wow i have just had a read through and totally identify with the weighing scenario, I am a weighing addict and then it upsets me, then I 'make myself feel better' with food! - I am restarting today, you've inspired me and I think the scales will have to go away - lets face it the number on a scale could be a lot higher than we think it should be but we could be wearing a tiny size - without the number we would feel happy..... Anyway best get kids to school, thank you for this wonderful diary of events and I will continue to follow! X

 

[angie-bum]

Hi guys

Frances I don't put it in the microwave I just have the runny paste, it does taste yummy. I don't like it too thick as I can taste the artificial additives, but I totally can't when it's runnier and laced with cocoa and orange I expect a quick blast would still be yummy. I did try making it chilled with ice cubes but it dulled the taste.

im wobbling at the moment just thinking how I'm going to maintain and not really believing I can which is silly. Realise I just have to concentrate on eating my 2 good meals a day and gradually add more food until I can maintain without fuss. Realise I will have to keep off the junk crisps cake etc and be ever vigilant to my going back to my old ways.

Hubby is doing intermittent fasting, which has been proven to have a number of health benefits so will start by doing that to maintain. i am just going to have to accept that I have to give up comfort eating & eating the foods I crave. Part of me is sad about that, but its going to have to be the case of having the crap food I crave very infrequently and upping the amount of delicious nutritious food instead. Said like that its not so much of a hardship is it?

i am a bit worried that I will get to goal just before Christmas and won't be able to get into the maintaining swing before the festivities. I suppose this year I can't make all about the food. When I was a kid it was about a week of eating lots of rich food and 2 days complete overeating.....but the last few years its been a pattern of getting in too much food too early and eating loads even before Christmas & having lots going into January. Not this year. I will not let it be an excuse to eat and eat until I burst.

clothes still look okay on me today, I have gotten used to looking smaller. But this also means I expect myself to look even thinner as the week goes on. Dieting does weird things to my head. Just have to keep eating the meals, one foot in front of the other, keep going.