BL's Excellent Adventure: Abstinance has left the building. :D

Hello peeps.

Well, here I am, a day or two away from the completion of week 3. And ya know what? I've had enough. LOL I am struggling, merely for the fact that I miss my healthy food that had become my diet.

When I did LL the first time, I felt healthier on LL as it was on the end of years of unhealthy eating. Now, it is on the tail of 10 months of healthy eating. SO I am feeling a bit fed up today.

I feel somewhat insensitive saying that, and I don;t mean to sound ungrateful for LL, for those who have been doing this a long time, or have along time to go yet. I really don't mean to sound that way. But its different the second time, even if it is only a matter of weeks.

Today I am off too minds. Do I complete the month I made a commitment to myself for, which should see me back to the lower range of weight I was in during RTM, and then be satisfied with how I look and feel, which I am and do now.....or do I stick it out and go all the way to the 10 stone.

I guess i have to decide really, just how important is it putting my footprint on 10 stone? I don't really think I would stay there. To be honest. Its really just for the ability to say "Hah! See! You DIDN'T break me for life!!" to my ex - who told me at 10 stone I was too fat to love.

Or, do I say sod it - what does it matter???

I desperately miss cooking. I am not hungry, its not that I am craving anything, or struggling with not eating - I just miss my healthy routine.

I know really all I can do is play it day by day. But today, I am feeling a bit fed up, and just want to get back to my new normal which I worked so hard to get to, and was thoroughly enjoying it.
Tomorrow I may feel differently.

Probably what is perhaps bugging me today is I have just bought 4 beautiful cookbooks. 1 low carb, 1 low GI (not the one I was after, but it will suffice for now), and 2 baking books. And the urge to get stuck in and try some of the recipes is quite strong. That old food porn. Its nowhere near as strong as I am, no it won;t break me - but it makes me realise how much I miss it. Maybe I will bake some stuff and pop it in the freezer for when I am done - who knows.

Just feeling very ready to be back to normal.

Hey ho - gonna have a nose through all the lovely photos in the books now, and dream of whats to come. :)

Hope everyone is well and happy!

XXX
 
hi there!
stick it out i reckon - its only another week afterall.

i would def do the baking tho!

daisy x
 
Hey there you

I think this is one only you can decide. From an outside perspective and please don't take this personally or the wrong way, I do worry that you are back on abstinance when your weight is already within a normal range and wonder if that is why you are struggling, your body isn't carrying enough excess weight any more to give you the energy you need on a day to day basis.

I can well understand the pull of a hitting a certain number on the scales albeit it for different reasons but as you quite rightly say, does it matter and could you maintain it - is it maybe more empowering to give the message to your ex of "I'm happy" regardless of what weight you are.

The other option that occurs is that you continue to aim for the magic 10 but do so with healthy eating rather than LL?

Loads of hugs and hope you don't mind me being so forthright!

xx
 
Hey G! :)

Thanks for your input - of course I don;t mind!! :)

I was not in a healthy range when I decided to do abstinanace again but I am back into it now. Although I was only over it very slightly. I think that set off alarm bells, and I felt 'oh no no we don't!!!' At that stage I could have gotten back to where through some hard work. Thats when I gave it lots of thought - do I do that - OR - do I go for that original goal through abs. But now - I am wondering if thats really that important....as I feel good now. I didn;t feel bad when I went back into abs, more frightened of climbing back up the scales - wanted to nip it in the bud. But I feel healthy and slim and happy - so - why am I chasing that? Is it really the end all - be all?

I totally understand what you are saying. And I am considering I could aim for that ellusive number through healthy eating and exercise, but one thing I have found is that I am still one of those people who does best with weight loss when on a strict plan. So - thats is why I kind of feel like its do it this way, or not at all. IF that makes any sense.

So - we'll see. I will complete my month, which is another week and a half. And see how I feel.

I know its a decision I need to make - it just helps make those by getting thoughts out there, andon the table so to speak.

I hope I am making sense - I have just woken from a brief nap and feel a little cloudy! lol

THanks hon - I always value your two penneth worth!! :)

XX
 
Heya BL

I have been giving your dillema quite some thought over the last few hours. I think the most important thing is to stop when you are happy, which you seem to be right now, and you have proved that yet again you can control your weight when necessary (such a huge thing I still have to face). I completely understand why you want to get to the 10stone mark, I know it is a big mental thing for you. If I am honest with myself I would love to show off to my ex fiance my new me. He always said he changed his mind about marrying me because he didn't want to be a thin guy with a fat woman. However, he really does not matter in my life anymore, and this is about me, not proving a point to him. If it was all about him then I would have failed at this diet like I have on so many others. I know you are a wonderful and insightful lady, so will do what ever is right for you. Good luck either way :)

Jez
xx
 
Hi BL

You ARE normal! You've lost a stone in 2 weeks. You are more than back to where you were when you finished abstinence before. I think Porgeous is right - your body hasn't got the reserves it used to have and also you have got a much more energetic lifestyle now than you had first time round.
I've seen you. I think a second month would probably be a bit too much, but hey,it's not my business. You must go with what instinctively feels best for you.
I know you will.
Everyone is giving you their thoughts because they care. That's so nice.
See you soon. xx
 
hi BL, long time no see. if i were you i would see out the fourth week as you have promised yourself ( you strike me as an honourable person and need to do at least that for your own satisfaciton) and then take a bit of time out and see how you feel about going for your ultimate target.
You set this target a long time ago and things may have changed-do you still want to go for that figure, and is LL the ONLY way to do it-if you ae missing food, and cleary have more control than 'in your past life' could you perhaps consider lossing the last few pounds by low calorie dieting? a it of the best of both worlds.

You look fabulous but its how you feel that matters. Whichever you choose , best of luck and i'll be watching your progress
 
Thank you SO much everyone for your comments. It means a lot to me!!

SB, I think you are right - I am feeling if I did go that extra stone, I might look to gaunt, and scraggy, and maybe thats just to far at my age now. After all, it was, ahem, more then a few years ago I weighed 10 stone!! :D

I have also been thinking, sheesh - that would mean even MORE baggy skin!! LOL And that leads me to something I thought about today = I bet my excess skin DOES weigh a stone. SO maybe really, I already am at the same SIZE I was, just not the same weight. I forget that the skin will weigh soemthing, even when theres nothing in it!

So - we'll get through the month I agreed with the LLC....and will probably call that a day. I may lose anouther pound or two in the short RTM I will be doing reintroducing food back.

Main thing, is I feel good, my blip and then some will be gone by then, and I can get back to it. Well, its gone now actually. :)

In any event, I have a week to think about it. :)

Thaks EVERYONE - you are ALL diamonds. :) :) :)

XXXX
 
HAPPY MONDAY!!! :D Is there such a thing? Yes there is! It's wiegh in day!!! WHoop whooop!!!

I have decided that this will be my last week, and the completion of the month minimum I set for myself.

I am becoming pretty convinced that the diet is indeed affecting my arthritis.....as the pain has been pretty constant for the last 2 weeks. My neck is better, but I am really suffering in my shoulders, and am beginning to think it is the lack of oils in my diet. My jointes desperately need lubrication, and I suffered a lot through the diet - felt marvelous when I went back to food, and now, suffering again - so it just seems to make sense.

Anyway - very happy with my decision. I have accomlished what I set out to do, with the exception of that old goal of 10 stone. But I have decided - I don;t need to prove anything to anyone, I only need to mkae myself happy - and I am.

So - this is my last week, and I am pleased as punch.

I spent all afternoon doing a massive sprin clean in mykitchen, getting even more prepared then last time for all healthy food, and easy preperations, etc. Feels good - its all ready to be re-stocked. Well, one half is anyway - only got one wall of cupboards done as my shoulder finally gave out. But it was a massive start, and I can work on the other side, which is not as importnat, over the coming days.

I decided, as my husband fitted out his new garage with all new tools, and storage, etc, I am going to do the same and I have started a wish list of new culinary things - knives, pots/pans, storage, gadgets, etc.

Also feeling extremely inspired by some of the new cookbooks I just bought - lots of gorgeous low GI and low carb options await.

Happy days!!

Thanks everyons, again, for such wonderful love and support.

XXXX
 
Hi BL - I'm pleased you've made a decision that you feel happy and comfortable with. Personally, I think it's the right decision for you - you need to be healthy and as long as you are within the BMI range then you need to listen to your body. As others have said you set the 10 stone limit a while ago and what was relevant then will be less so now. Who cares what your ex said - that was his problem and you have been on this journey for you, not for him. Well done and good luck with your last week of abstinence!
 
Some well thought through decision making in progress. Good use of CBT and TA learning.

Enjoy your final week of abstinence BL. xx
 
Fantastic BL

Well done you. That's the way to do it.
Knock iton the head straight away.
Now we can plan our next shopping trip.
Congratulations. Hope youhave a good week.
 
nice one!
daisy x
 
Great result BL! Same again next week hon.
 
Congrats Hun, great weight loss. I am so glad to hear your decision, I knew you would pick the very best for you, because I can see how much you now value yourself!! I think you have done absolutely the right thing. I cannot wait to start the healthy cooking and healthy eating, so really don't blame you for wanting that back in your life. Your thoughts about arthritis make sense. My sister who is on a similar VLCD has noticed that she has incredible pain in her hips and knees now since on the diet. It must have something to do with the joints and oils as you mention. I shall pass the advice on to her, and hopefully this will improve when she starts eating again. Do you think she could take Jointace (a suppliment for joints) or something?

Jez
xx
 
well because its your favourite ;)

:bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss:

WELL DONE!!!

;)
 
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