CDC Advice please

Discussion in 'Cambridge Weight Plan' started by sim94, 18 June 2008 Social URL.

  1. sim94

    sim94 Cambridge Diet Counsellor

    I've just seen a client (very nice lady)who from time to time brings her 3 year old with her. On her own I feel she find her a handful. She constantly telling her not to touch (not that she listens).

    Today she turned up with her oldest and the 2 together they are more than a 2 handfulls. I had to listen to more of her telling them not to touch which was ignored as usual.
    I'm concerned they my hurt themselves as I have my Tetra's stacked up neatly, but the 3 year old insist on touching them. Her plea to her not to touch them seem very weak at best.

    I've tried light heartedly say be careful I wouldn't want you to hurt yourself so she will get the hint and step in and she doesn't.

    At appointments I feel I'm the one keeping an eye out so her child so she doesn't get hurt or break something.

    Any advice please
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  3. nicaukids

    nicaukids Full Member

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    Hi Sim
    I've just come back from my WI (with 2 &half year old in tow). With the exception of the first visit - I try & keep them as quick as possible... I know if we're there too long - there'll be shiny things she'll want to play with :(
    It's your home - your rules.
    Does she take a long time?
    I mean, a quick "are you OK?" and jump on the scales is 10 minutes for me.

    Alt: Do you sit at a table? Get a pencil & paper out, or a grown up book - cars or something?
    Distraction works BUT it's NOT your job!
  4. sim94

    sim94 Cambridge Diet Counsellor

    Thanks Nicky,

    I know children will be children, but my main concern is I'd feel terrible if she got her.

    We do sit at a table which she was told to sit at my her mum, but with in seconds she was up from and banging the side flops of it and then moved on to the Tetra's.

    I do try to keep appointments as short as possible if she is not alone, but she like to have a chat which I don't mind if she is on her own. I think I'll need to tackfully say to her if she come with one or more of the children we will have to be brief with the appointments.
  5. XlosingitX

    XlosingitX Gold Member

    hi sim im not a cdc but you could say to the mum that you feel you would be able to talk to her better regarding her progress ect.....if you too where to be alone
  6. misscheeky

    misscheeky Gold Member

    sometimes i do bring my 3yo with me weekdays esp but she doesnt touch anything and just waits. If i was you id say it to the mum just say something like she would get more out of the appoitment if the child wasnt with her..i can see where your coming from though :)
  7. spooky

    spooky Banned

    Is it worth having a small box of toys? Bricks or Lego perhaps to keep them occupied while Mum is being weighed?
  8. mum_of_one

    mum_of_one Silver Member


    I take my 2 yr old to my weigh ins as I have nobody else to watch him and I have to say he runs riot and I restrain him but she says not to worry but last week he tipped over all her cat food and water bowl and was grabbing plants. I find it very frustrating. She is so good with him though but I feel embarrassed so now I run in weigh and get my products and leave as quick as poss.

    I usually make sure I have a little car or something to give him in there. I buy a cheap little hot wheels car for 80p and give it as I walk in so he spends ten mins staring at it ! ha ha
  9. sim94

    sim94 Cambridge Diet Counsellor

    I have a few others that bring children of different ages from toddlers to teens, and they are well behaved. If they do touch the parent sorts them and they are usually keen to keep the appointment brief.

    A client just that just left she always brings her 4 year old, she has done since he was about 10 or 11 months old. I look forward to seeing him, he does misbehave from time to time as children do but I no she doesn't over look it.
  10. karenO

    karenO Step away from the chips!

    Its really difficult with little ones & tbh i feel for her with 2 under 3s myself.
    There's a huge amount of pressure on parents these days not to be seen to be too "disciplinarian" with their children and i can bet that she's probably mortified if her wee ones are running riot at yours. I know i would be but sometimes we dont like to be seen as being heavy handed on the taking the children in hand front. Its a tough job being a mummy & you know you're damned if you do & damned if you dont. Also i'd be willing to bet that if she could make her appointments with you without the children then she would. Chances are she has no other option.

    Keeping a little box of toys, stickers, colouring book & crayons might be a good idea as Spooky suggested. And if you really cant tolerate her having the children with her maybe you could talk about changing her appointments to evening times when her little ones would be in bed? Just a thought.

    If you do choose to say something to her about her children misbehaving while she has her appointment, please try to do it with tact - if she's feeling crap about her weight you risk making her feel like a crap mum too. Unfortunately all kiddies dont come out of the same mould and even the angelic ones can have their moments that make their mums want to shrivel up & die with embarassment :eek:
  11. karenO

    karenO Step away from the chips!

    Sorry this is bugging me so i'm going to say it and be damned :(

    I think its a bit inappropriate to discuss the behaviour of one of your clients children on a public forum. If my CDC was to do this i think i'd be pretty annoyed tbh and i'd be looking at trading him in for another.

    Cant help thinking there's bound to have been a more discreet way to seek advice for this problem, through HQ for example?

    Sorry if this has offended but its just my feelings on the matter for what they're worth.
  12. sim94

    sim94 Cambridge Diet Counsellor

    As a mother myself I understand the pressure to or not to discipline children, Though I must admit I had little to no trouble with my daughter when asked not to touch things.

    To be honest if she is embarassed she hides it well, as she is in no hurry to stop her child touching things that could lead her to being hurt.

    Today as in every appointment her daughter was playing with table and nearly squashed her fingers. The reason she didn't was I was the one with my eye's on her, to stop it happening.

    Its not that I can't tollerate her, she's a lovely little girl. Its just on I'm on tender hooks trying to weigh, measure, talk to mum and keep an eye on what is going on.
    I no I'll be nothing but tackful when I speak to her and suggest we keep appointment brief, if she has the one or both of the children with her as I am I concerned for their safety.
  13. sim94

    sim94 Cambridge Diet Counsellor

    You are in titled to your opinion. I am not offended.

    I have not named names and would not dream or doing so. For that reason have made slight changes without detracting from the point.
  14. Shazpaz

    Shazpaz Regular Member

    South Beach

    I feel you have completely overreacted to this thread. She hasn't named the client, but asked for help and advice, which I think is appropriate on this forum.

    I have a daughter and would not allow her to disrespect someone or behave badly in someone elses house. As she is a child then like all children she has her moments, but I would always step in and discipline her. Thats my job.

    sim94.......I agree that maybe having some toys to had would be a good idea. If this doesn't work, then just be direct with her and explain that you are concerned the child could hurt herself if she pulls over the tetras.

    Good luck hun...and I personally feel this is a totally appropriate place to ask for help and advice.
    Last edited: 18 June 2008
  15. karenO

    karenO Step away from the chips!

    Sorry, but i just put myself in the lady's shoes and wondered how i would feel if i had logged on here & found a post like this from my CDC. I'd be mortified to the point where i probably wouldnt go back to him.

    Maybe i have taken it too much to heart but its difficult not to sometimes when you've found yourself in a similar situation (not with my CDC i hasten to add - i hope :eek::))
  16. Mrs B

    Mrs B Silver Member

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    Or maybe it would make her realise her children's behaviour is unacceptable.

    This forum is for everyone and no names were mentioned so I can't see the problem with a CDC asking for advice on here. There can't be many places where they can chat to each other about problem clients.
  17. flirty40greeneyes

    flirty40greeneyes Busy busy busy!!

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    I don't think Sim94 has been inappropriate as there is no way of identifying her client. Similarily we often have people on here saying things about their CDC's and unless they are identified we don't moderate the posts.

    I think Sim94 is trying to find a way to deal with a difficult situation, where some parents are not taking their "looking after their children role" seriously. I have been in this situation myself both as a CDC and outside in the real world.

    Back to the subject - I keep a box of toys handy (use to be a childminder) and have often brought them out for little ones who come with mums. Most mums and children are glad of the diversion and happy children = happy mum = happy me!
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  19. nikki mc

    nikki mc Member

    Hiya, is there anyway you could do the weigh ins at her house? if you organise it so that she gives you a ring beforehand with a list of packs/tetras maybe that could be your solution?
  20. healpro

    healpro Full Member

    I agree with karenO, confidentiality should be a given with a counsellor - I doubt you could have changed the circumstances enough to fool your client had she logged into the forum. Even if it were impossible for her to have guessed, it displays a lack of professionalism which is worrying. i speak as a client myself.

  21. healpro

    healpro Full Member

    I agree with nikki - do it at hers; her house, her child, her problem

  22. Shazpaz

    Shazpaz Regular Member

    South Beach
    What is unprofessional about asking for advice on a situation that she is experiencing? She has not named anyone! She has not described the person? WOW guys....lighten up. She just wants help from other CDC's and clients!!
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