Claire's art of self-sabotage
- Thread starter ClaireCat
- Start date
Mrsfeeneytobe
Silver Member
I really feel for you.....for what its worth....I have had counselling for other issues in the past and it did wonders for me to stop being so harsh on myself and address the issues i had held onto for so long that were affecting my attitude to life today whilst managing my depression.....but more recently i have been using hypnotherapy to help deal with my food related demons now and i can say it has been worth it for me personally...all of this combined has helped me approach things differently and of course stop the self hating when it starts sooner rather than later as it achieves nothing nothing in the long run and is incredibly emotionally draining.....be happy for the wins in day to day life...we only get one go of this life so we need to dust ourselves off and do what we can to enjoy it.....i have learned to cope better with really challenging stuff in recent times like the death of my niece 2 christmases ago...and last year the suicide of one of my best friends from the lessons i learned from counselling before.....both events also taught me that our time here on earth is precious....so appreciate the little and big things and take positive steps to improve the not so great things...but most of all....stop with the self bashing.....its time lost that can never be regained.
Hope i haven't put you or anyone else in a debbie downer mood....just wanted to show that things can change and its important to have a good attitude.....it really helps so anything that can be done to turn things around is worth it....however small or big....xxx
Hope i haven't put you or anyone else in a debbie downer mood....just wanted to show that things can change and its important to have a good attitude.....it really helps so anything that can be done to turn things around is worth it....however small or big....xxx
ClaireCat
On a mission for boobs!
Hello. Thanks everyone.
Hypnotherapy was, well, emotional and a bit, well... I cant think of the word, but I'm imagining hippies swaying about talking about their inner temple whilst worshipping a goddess!
Don't get me wrong, I feel much better. It was nice to not be judged for 2 hours. She wants me to go for 2 hours every weekend for 4 weeks to start with.
Now, at £60 per hour, for 8 hours a month, is a bit out of my budget, so I think I will have to pass on that. But it was nice to talk to someone, and I really do feel much better. But I'm not sure if thats because the hypnotherapy helped, or because I cried, alot, for 2 hours. Crying always makes me feel better.
I've made a doctors appointment for next Friday afternoon to see about going to speak to a psychologist. I think I can get referred because of my mentalness - but I'll find out.
I am very good at twisting everything, making mountains out of mole-hills and self-sabotaging. I even know I'm doing it, but I keep doing it anyway. So hoping I can get something to help - that's going to be cheaper than £500 a month.
Got my consultation on Friday, so I'm quite looking forward to that. But not really too sure if I can afford it without having to take out a loan to cover some of it, since I decided to start studying for a degree in September and I need to fund that myself. Also, since I didn't get my nice new job with my nice wage rise, I might need to hold off for a bit. I was supposed to get a wage rise in my current job this month, but noone has spoken to me about it. They've either forgotten or just ignoring the fact that they promised to review my salary in February. Anyway, I'll see how the consultation goes. If anything, I'm looking forward to a wee day trip to Engyland.
Not sure how my diet will fair on Friday though as I am a bit reluctant to take a bag full of powder on the plane with me, and I really dont want to have to carry my shaker bottle about because, well, it rattles in my bag! And I'd need to clean it so it doesn't go icky. I think it's going to be a day of s&s crisps, bars and wafers with maybe a nandos or something.
Jobwise, I'm really trying to not think about how depressing my current job is. I think I uttered 2 words to the people in my office today. I really need to talk, and they can quite happily sit in silence all day. Or if they do talk, its to have a moan amongst themselves like a bunch of old fish wives. I'd much rather not get involved. I keep disappearing to the upstairs office for some conversation! We have a new start on the 19th of March - I'm hoping she's chatty. Or at the very least, give everyone else someone else to dump their crap onto that's not me.
Keeping one eye on the job market, but not looking to jump ship for any old job. It'll have to be a decent move. I don't want my cv getting really choppy, and I'm sick of changing jobs. I just want one that fits properly.
Hypnotherapy was, well, emotional and a bit, well... I cant think of the word, but I'm imagining hippies swaying about talking about their inner temple whilst worshipping a goddess!
Don't get me wrong, I feel much better. It was nice to not be judged for 2 hours. She wants me to go for 2 hours every weekend for 4 weeks to start with.
Now, at £60 per hour, for 8 hours a month, is a bit out of my budget, so I think I will have to pass on that. But it was nice to talk to someone, and I really do feel much better. But I'm not sure if thats because the hypnotherapy helped, or because I cried, alot, for 2 hours. Crying always makes me feel better.
I've made a doctors appointment for next Friday afternoon to see about going to speak to a psychologist. I think I can get referred because of my mentalness - but I'll find out.
I am very good at twisting everything, making mountains out of mole-hills and self-sabotaging. I even know I'm doing it, but I keep doing it anyway. So hoping I can get something to help - that's going to be cheaper than £500 a month.
Got my consultation on Friday, so I'm quite looking forward to that. But not really too sure if I can afford it without having to take out a loan to cover some of it, since I decided to start studying for a degree in September and I need to fund that myself. Also, since I didn't get my nice new job with my nice wage rise, I might need to hold off for a bit. I was supposed to get a wage rise in my current job this month, but noone has spoken to me about it. They've either forgotten or just ignoring the fact that they promised to review my salary in February. Anyway, I'll see how the consultation goes. If anything, I'm looking forward to a wee day trip to Engyland.
Not sure how my diet will fair on Friday though as I am a bit reluctant to take a bag full of powder on the plane with me, and I really dont want to have to carry my shaker bottle about because, well, it rattles in my bag! And I'd need to clean it so it doesn't go icky. I think it's going to be a day of s&s crisps, bars and wafers with maybe a nandos or something.
Jobwise, I'm really trying to not think about how depressing my current job is. I think I uttered 2 words to the people in my office today. I really need to talk, and they can quite happily sit in silence all day. Or if they do talk, its to have a moan amongst themselves like a bunch of old fish wives. I'd much rather not get involved. I keep disappearing to the upstairs office for some conversation! We have a new start on the 19th of March - I'm hoping she's chatty. Or at the very least, give everyone else someone else to dump their crap onto that's not me.
Keeping one eye on the job market, but not looking to jump ship for any old job. It'll have to be a decent move. I don't want my cv getting really choppy, and I'm sick of changing jobs. I just want one that fits properly.
LadySylvanas
Full Member
Hi Claire how did the boob consultation go? x
ClaireCat
On a mission for boobs!
Hello!
Consultation went very well. However twice as expensive as I had anticipated, so it's on hold for the moment. I need alot more work than just sticking an implant in, so I'm looking at about £7k or there abouts.
Failed miserably at the diet over the last 3 weeks since I found out, but I'm back on it as of yesterday. Not going to weigh again until the end of the month so I don't depress myself too much with the gain!
How are you getting on sweetie?
Consultation went very well. However twice as expensive as I had anticipated, so it's on hold for the moment. I need alot more work than just sticking an implant in, so I'm looking at about £7k or there abouts.
Failed miserably at the diet over the last 3 weeks since I found out, but I'm back on it as of yesterday. Not going to weigh again until the end of the month so I don't depress myself too much with the gain!
How are you getting on sweetie?
LadySylvanas
Full Member
Wb Claire awww but that's ok it will surely happen one day and in the meantime you can just focus on losing weight & getting fit etc. I also fell off the wagon but didn't put any weight on it's a miracle lol. Got my products so I'm restarting as well, just need to finish my orange juice and rice pudding first, don't know why I bought that much hehe hubby hates them
By the way I had a blood test done for infertility about 2 weeks ago and then got a phone call from the surgery saying my gp wants to see me and it scared me a bit, appointment is today at 9:40 but I was too impatient so went to the surgery yesterday and wanted a copy of my results. It says I have underactive thyroid... I've read about it and wow I have most of the symptoms if not all. From weight gain (also I think this is why I lose way slower than others) to infertility, depression etc etc. I've even had this funny swollen feeling in my throat for a while now. So he'll most probably put me on levothyroxine today, but not sure. But medicine apparently reverse the symptoms quite quickly so fingers crossed.
By the way I had a blood test done for infertility about 2 weeks ago and then got a phone call from the surgery saying my gp wants to see me and it scared me a bit, appointment is today at 9:40 but I was too impatient so went to the surgery yesterday and wanted a copy of my results. It says I have underactive thyroid... I've read about it and wow I have most of the symptoms if not all. From weight gain (also I think this is why I lose way slower than others) to infertility, depression etc etc. I've even had this funny swollen feeling in my throat for a while now. So he'll most probably put me on levothyroxine today, but not sure. But medicine apparently reverse the symptoms quite quickly so fingers crossed.
shrinkydink
Full Member
Oh Clairecat you poor lil pixie at least your back on a mission .
Ive been catching up loving the hippies I must say made me laugh.Ive gotta say theres nothing wrong with being slightly mental as long as one can do a cracking normal impersonation when required. hope all is well x
Ive been catching up loving the hippies I must say made me laugh.Ive gotta say theres nothing wrong with being slightly mental as long as one can do a cracking normal impersonation when required. hope all is well x
