Diet on Hold......Watch this space......

Gemma, Hope today was better for you.
As for your laptop crashing - at least you got out of you what you wanted to say before it did that, that will be a good thing in itself, sometimes you dont need to show other people, just get it out so you can see it (even if it was only for a moment!)
x
 
Yay, thanks girls, my DJ Recoveries ladies. :D You are all so amazing, and your posts fill me with a bit more brightness everyday, thank-you. :)

Food hasn't been so good, but thats not my focus right now, I will get back on track but I need my head sorting out again first.

I spent all day filling out an application for a job. It wasn't particularly hard, but I haven't done one for nearly two years and I have always lacked confidence in my own abilities so find it very hard to "sell" myself to potential employers. I worked really hard on it and have done the best I can. I have sealed it in the envelope with a stamp and will post it first thing in the morning. I have bottled out posting applications many times before, because I always feel I'm not good enough and that no-one will employ me. But I am now thinking I have nothing to lose by trying and everything to gain if I'm successful. Plus I don't want all my hard work to go to waste.

Thats a real positive thing thats come from today, although I did get upset with it and bawled my eyes out to my mum, it all just came out how useless I feel. But anyway. Fingers-crossed, we will see what happens.

Thanks again everyone for not giving up on me, I don't know what I would do without you.

I'm off to watch Terminator 2 on the tv and watch the scary Robert Patrick, baddie machine. :eek:

Love Gemma
xx

:grouphugg:
 
Last edited:
Hi Gemma, you need to be kind to yourself sweetheart, we can be our own worst enemies putting ourselves down and slagging ourselves off which does nothing for our self esteem.
It sounds like youve got yourself into a rut and keep telling yourself you are useless! BUT YOU ARE NOT!!!! You are a beautiful caring, sympathetic, understanding and genuine lady. You take time to care for others and thats a quality not everyone posseses! You have a passion for the natural and beautiful things that life has to offer (ie the beautiful countryside!) You are a sensative soul and you deserve to be happy. I feel that getting into a routine with your life will help you immensly! Being overweight (imho) is a symptom of unhappiness. I truly believe that if you find a job it will restablish your self belief and self worth! If you have more structure to your day and less time to dwell on things you will feel so much better and the extra money will certainly help you too im sure. The routine will help with the healthy eating as its very difficult to diet when your are bored/stressed/lonely all day. Sometimes we have to treat the cause of the problem before we can treat the symptom (weight).
Best of luck Gemma with the job application, keep trying till you get a job and dont feel bad or take it personally if you dont get the 1st one you apply for, though you very well might! Just keep trying hun, the right job for you will come along, and life will seem brighter i promise, and remember we will all be here for you whenever you need us. Chin up sweetheart, and remember, you are who you are, and you are worth so much, be proud, and in your mothers words "dont worry, be happy!"

Love Diane xx
 
Gemma,
It's so good to hear that you're starting to take those positive steps once again!
It is hard to sell yourself to potential employers and so heartbreaking when you get rejected. During my last semester at uni I spent DAYS filling in forms, never sure whether I wanted the job or not and even less sure why they would want me!
Don't let it get you down though hun, be strong, be proud. You have a lot to offer, I'm sure. Diane was right: "You are a beautiful caring, sympathetic, understanding and genuine lady. You take time to care for others and thats a quality not everyone posseses! You have a passion for the natural and beautiful things that life has to offer (ie the beautiful countryside!) You are a sensative soul and you deserve to be happy. "

~Silence~
 
Filling in forms and applying for jobs is the bane of my existence the now. Just because they don't pick you does not mean it is anything against you personally. Just simply your CV/application form does not meet what they are after.
 
Hi Timelady
how are you doing today. Great news on the job application front. You and me both girl. In fact I only emailed the personnal manager of the agency where I am doing my work placement at the moment this morning, and was expecting a reply when I checked emails this evening, and zilch!!! Dont take it personally if you dont get called for an interview, I know its easy to, but really its not personal. Are you applying for archeological jobs? How exciting.
How is Mac by the way. Still bringing you out for walks?
Anyway my friend, keep chin up, and keep climbing back to where you want to be.
Lots of love
xx
 
Well the dreaded application form is in the post. Fingers crossed. I also got the Daily Echo for the job section in there to see if there are any good jobs going. I am not applying for jobs in archaeology unfortunately, its so bloody competitive and you need experience, but the only way to get it is to work, its a round in circles thing. But I am kinda thinking that I will make it a hobby and volunteer on digs during my holiday time and stuff. :)

I feel sorry for mum because I know that she isn't completely ready for me to go back to work, but my brothers being laid off from their jobs this week, really puts pressure on the finances so at the moment I have no choice but to look for work. I am also hoping that the extra money will mean that I will be able to treat her and take her out other places to get her spirits back up again and take care of her that way.

I hope you get a nice reply to your email clarri. Mac is doing just fine, is conked out on my mum's bed because we took him down the river for a couple of hours this afternoon and he wore himself out lol. Plus he knows that tomorrow is our big walking day so he is probably resting up. :D

As if we don't have enough problems already, my youngest brother Mikey, was assaulted by one of his friends step dad today. He is 14 on Saturday and this guy is a grown man laying into a boy. Its a long story so I won't go into much detail. But Mikey is ok, a few bruises and cuts where he fell against a fence and the guy kicked him. Needless to say everyone in the house was fuming at this news. The police have been informed and hopefully the guy will be arrested very soon. I can't believe it, its disgusting. I feel sorry for my little brother, he isn't a bad boy and this is the second beating he has gotten (1st was after school, kids ganged up on him :( ) Yet again the kind of crap that happens to my family. We must be cursed or paying for bad karma or something.

Anyway. Thats enough of my day, sorry for chewing your ears off. Food wise, still not great but I am working on my head at the moment which is getting a little brighter everyday, impart its thanks to all your support and kind words.

Love you all.
Gemma
xx
 
Oh Gemma,
Your poor little brother. Thats awful, and the trouble is, nothing will prob come of it.
Good to hear that you are feeling better mentally. Wrap the cotton wool around yourself. this is very important to do when your head is not in a good place.
Enjoy the walking tomorrow. Lucky you. I am back in wk exp tomorrow, and hoping not to meet that boy again.
Sleep well.
xxx
 
Thanks clarri, I hope its a nice day for a walk tomorrow, think its just what I need a day of fresh air. :)

I hope you have a good day at work experience tomorrow and I am sure that you will be able to handle the boy if he comes back no probs. ;)

See you tomorrow evening.
Gemma
xx
 
It's good to hear you're sorting your head out hun! Well done!!!
Hope you and Mac enjoy your long walk tomorrow. :)

~Silence~
 
Gemma, Clarri and I are doing a challenge to walk x (number to be confirmed) miles per day or at the very least to take a walk every day for the next week. I thought, given how much you like walking, you might like to join us in our mini challenge!!!
Hope you're ok chick

~Silence~
 
Hey ladies, thanks for stopping by. Sorry, I'm not ignoring anyone, just you know what I am like sometimes I go on a posting spree and sometimes I'm a little quite, its nothing personal. ;)

My walk on Friday was a lovely one, Mum, Mac and I all enjoyed it and we were pretty done it by the time we got home. :)

Saturday was my little brother's birthday, he was 14 and we all spent the day at home playing on his Wii and generally having fun.

Sunday was a funny day because it is my late granddad's (my mum's dad) birthday, I can't believe he has been gone 5 years, I still miss him now we all do. :(

And now to today, I am alright I guess, I have been taking care of myself like clarri said and have been trying to look on the bright-side of things, even thinking positively about the job application etc. :)

As you know diet is out of the window at the moment, til I get sorted out. But I will get there.

Hey Silence. I am not sure about walking a specific number of miles everyday, but I will certainly try to get out with my little mate Mac, I can join in that way and make up for miles on my long walks at the weekend.

Thats it for now. I will go and check out your diaries.

Love Gemma
xx

P.S. I decided to remove my photos from the first page until I am ready to get back to the business of losing weight.
 
Last edited:
Hey Gemma
Sounds like you are making positive moves to improving your emotions. Good on you. Hope ur brother is in good form, and that he enjoyed his birthday.
Thanks for the lovely words, you are a great support and make everyone feel better for it.
xxx
 
Gemma, sorry to hear about your wee brother, but glad he had a great birthday with you all.
All the best on the job front too

x
 
Hey Gemma.
How are you my love? How's everything going? Hope you're ok, you've not posted for a few days.
~Silence~
 
Back
Top