Encouraging Myself!

[beccus]

I hope it is ok to just start a diary here, I'm new round these parts, but think if I can write down my feelings a little I might be able to sort them out without resorting to food.
I've been a biiiiiig girl most of my life, and as an adult have tried various diets, but always fallen off the wagon. I've had varying degrees of success, hitting 20 stone at my biggest (being 5 ft 3 this was just ridiculous) and dropping down to 17 and a half on weight watchers once.
Over the years of living with my boyfriend we've often started a regime of sorts, one or other of us will fall and drag the other one down, but each time we've lost a little bit more, and our habits have changed for the better, but we're not getting any younger and we'd both like to live long healthy lives together.
Which brings us to dukan. A friend of ours has lost significant weight doing this diet and she said the magic words "I'm never hungry" - well, we were hooked enough to buy and read the book, and decide to give it a try. So on 13th may, having eaten all the crap in our house the week before (yes, we really are those people!) we started and here we are.

We are in this together, and I'm very grateful for the support, because I have so little willpower it is beyond ridiculous! We weigh in on a monday and friday (and sometimes I sneak one in midweek), we try and walk for 30 mins every day, and I have just started to attend a zumba class once a week - you've not seen a red face until you've seen me after that!

 

[CHRISR]

Welcome to the forum beccus and yes you've found the best one. Well in my opinion anyway, any questions just ask

 

[Paulinegin]

Welcome Becca, good to 'meet' you and what a fabulous Dukan start!

P x

 

[CheeseGirl]

Welcome and best of luck, it's great you have a partner to do this with!

 

[beccus]

Thanks everyone!
It is becoming easier every day, though I'm in an interesting position, having been made redundant at the end of 2012 I'm at home most days at the moment, I'm interviewing, but yet to get the right job. Hopefully soon and then I know things might be tougher as I will have to plan my menus better - no more grilling a steak at lunchtime!

I am very lucky to share this journey with my partner, he has loads more willpower than me (and no sweet tooth to worry about!) so really pulls me out of the doldrums when I need him too.

I'm struggling at times, being really honest here, with the rejection that comes with interviewing for lots of jobs not to dive head first into a bowl of ice cream or something. What I think I'm saying is I'm trying really hard to address not just my weight, but my food issues - it's bloomin' hard though! We Brits are not great at being kind to ourselves and thinking about our feelings.

I also have worries around losing too much weight and not being "me" anymore - If I'm not the fat one who am I? Not that I define myself by my weight, just my weight has always been a descriptor. I've been known to suggest (under my breath) that the skinny *****y girl in the corner would benefit from a cake!

This is all a bit... deep for a wednesday morning, but I think I need to think about these things!

 

[CHRISR]

its good to think now and again and remember most of us on the forum have the same worries and fears as you. Good luck on the job front

 

[beccus]

Thanks Chris!

Today is a PV day for us, and I'm really excited to be going out for dinner for a friends birthday. We are going to a really lovely place for steak - which is perfect (i'm sure they use oil and/or butter, but as a treat, I know I can get away with it!) where the sides are easily interchangeable, so I feel safe not having to amend my order too much!

Hoping for another couple of pounds off tomorrow - my jeans are getting quite loose which is a lovely feeling, and I am replacing my suit trousers with a smaller size as they were a bit ridiculous yesterday!

 

[beccus]

Stupidly excited to have worked out that I have lost 5% of my starting weight

 

[beccus]

Weigh in on Friday we both lost another 3lb.
I'm just 4lb away from being 16stone.

 

[sididd]

Go Beccus what a fabulous start good luck xxx

 

[Maintainer]

Hello Beccus - and I thoroughly enjoyed reading your diary! You are very lucky to be doing this with your other half BUT, I should warn you, men lose far quicker than we do (usually!).

Congratulations on your loss to date.
x

 

[beccus]

Ugh - having a totally rubbish week, hanging onto the diet by the skin of my teeth, and my emotions too!
Hope I'll be back in a better frame of mind soon, but as it stands am staying away from people!

hugs all round!

 

[beccus]

Thanks Maintainer and Sididd.
I'm braced for him to lose quicker - he'll also reach stage 3 before me!!! Has lots less to lose
x

 

[sididd]

Beccus you'll be surprised at how soon you'll be in the swing of this and it become well........natural xxx hang on we are holding you

 

[CheeseGirl]

Hey Bec, Jo is right! Men always lose faster but then don't let that get you down. Men are also bigger idiots than we are so that's a compensation
But hang in there, we're with you all the way

 

[beccus]

Thanks gang!
I did it, I got through the worst of it with just one slip up - We bunked off for the afternoon monday and had ice cream at the seaside. I wanted it all, chips, ice cream, donuts, but I made do with one small ice cream and enjoyed it. I think I did ok - a month ago I'd have bought up the sweet aisle in sainsburies.

I also went to zumba last night and I think I encountered those mythical endorphins mad exercise people made up! I actually felt good after it

I'm not expecting a loss tomorrow, as long as the gain is minimal I think I'll be ok. I think I might be hormonal too, which really, really doesn't help! I'm so hungry, which is not my usual state of affairs on this diet.

B xxx

 

[sididd]

You never know fingers crossed for a loss xxx

 

[beccus]

I did it! i actually had a loss this morning.
I lost the 1/2lb I put on over the weekend and another couple... I've almost lost 20lb.

I'm really pleased, I think I needed that boost, and I've got past the ravenous all the time stage I've been going through this week.
I think we've got some nice recipes lined up this week, so fingers crossed we'll have a great week and another loss. Emotionally I think I've got through the worst of this current dark patch - I've got a few avenues to explore work wise so hopefully I'll get there soon.

 

[beccus]

I'm also starting to think about mini goals and targets to keep me motivated along the way, I don't think these are exhaustive, and I think they won't all be scale based, so here are a few of them:

- lose half a stone (silver 7!)
- lose a stone
- under 16 stone
- 10% weight loss
- fit into the jeans I've got in the wardrobe (size 20 I think) without feeling self concious!
- lose a stone and a half

These are just the early ones to keep me going. According to Dukan my true weight should be 12 and a half stone, which is still more than BMI suggests, but it is certainly way better than the 20 stone I once was, and the 17 and a half stone I was when I started Dukan.

 

[beccus]

We went out for lunch today, we went to GBK, the Gourmet Burger Kitchen, it's new in Norwich and I have to say really, really awesome! They offer a naked burger, without the bun and you get homeslaw and a side salad. The slaw is in a vinaigrette instead of mayo and I was so super impressed with the whole thing. It's probably a bit fattier than is right, but as an option when you are out, it's a good one. We had the Wellington burger, with mushroom, rocket and horseradish.

Feeling a lot better about things in general, people are starting to notice and comment about our weight loss, which helps boost the confidence! I think I've got past the worst of the "shark week" issues I've mentioned before, I'm less ravenous and generally all is good today!

I made the chocolate mousse earlier today, which was actually really tasty and I think might help with the cravings, I might try and make them with a little coffee next time, mocha mousse! Though it was a little runny at the bottom, which I think was more to do with not whisking the eggs enough.

Phew, boring update, but long!