Funny Farm's Diary

It's so hard when someone makes out you're the bad one. I've got a similar situation - an ex friend and business partner rather than a husband though. It's been 3 years since everything went wrong and I know she's made out it was me. I still get so angry that she's not been honest about why she lost her home - it was her decision many months before we fell out. I think of it every day so I know how you feel. I can't offer you the answer or any particularly wise words about how to get over the anger and annoyance at someone's lies but I can tell you it slowly becomes less important. I'm now at the stage where I'm thinking 'why do I let her lies take up my time?' Talk to the people who really matter to you (I still haven't done that but I am going to) and really try not to worry about the others. Be honest with people (there was fault on both sides) as people like that and will believe you. I really hope you feel better. Please don't waste too much of your time and energy thinking about him and his lies. You will get the chance one day to tell your side of the story. Hope you're ok today. Keep your chin up and head held high. And another thing....get yourself looking fantastic - best way to feel better lol xx
 
Thank you everyone, I feel a bit stronger, but completely wiped out from all the crying! I've managed to not eat food, and that's something I can take from it.

I've decided the best thing I can do is to be a better me. I'm making a real push to start my business again, and I'm going to carry on with this diet and then I'm going to look good, be successful, and not give a monkeys what he thinks of me.

I've agreed to do a stand up gig tomorrow, and it's always really busy so I'm not sure it was a good idea when I'm feeling like this. Hopefully it'll take my mind off things.
 
Ooh thank you! Way better than junk food.

You're very wise, I appreciate your words very much.
 
diembroadhurst said:
A relationship ending is like a bereavement - sometime out of nowhere when you think you are coping something comes along to rock the foundations a bit and shake you up - but sounds to me like you have great foundations that won't make you crumble which means you are stronger and are choosing much more positive coping strategies.

I think having a good, gut wrenching, primal cry every now and again is really cathartic - alot of the stored pent up frustrations and emotions from other area's of our life also get washed away with it all as well and as emotionally draining as it all was and still is today, a hot bath and an early night tonight will see you feeling lighter tomorrow morning and lighter still the day after.

I think you have coped amazingly well so I am giving you a gold star :)
Click to expand...

I couldn't agree more !

Although, I do believe death is actually easier to accept. There are too many "what if's" "why's" and "maybe's" that we always mull over from a break up.
:)
 
With a death, there isn't betrayal, cruelty and rejection. Plus there's insurance. I know what I'd have chosen!
 
I desperately want to gorge. I can't rest, too anxious, but can't do anything, too exhausted. I need a carb coma!
 
I managed some sleep which helped. I don't see why this had to happen a few days before ketosis kicked in. It's been torture!
 
Went to asda. There was freshly baked bread smell. I didn't cave, and I walked out feeling like a superstar. If I can do this week, I can do anything.

Roll on ketosis and a new me, slimmer and stronger than ever!
 
Oh wow ! Now that's proper will power !
A hangover free tomorrow will be easier :)
 
How have you been today ? :)
 
Today was good. My gig was great fun. Got another gig offer out of it, and a man from the radio wants to interview me. Very exciting.

I don't like all the attention, which makes standing on a stage telling jokes a bit of a silly hobby.
 
Well, if you dont like the on stage attention, it sounds like the radio gig is perfect for you ;)
Im glad you had a good day yesterday :D
Heres to another :D
 
Thanks!

I had a long chat with a friend about someone who betrayed her. I was basically telling her the friend was a coward, and she she shouldn't waste anger on her. It's a shortened version of the story, but I decided to take my own advice with regards to the ex.

I pity him, and his need to lie and believe his own lies. I have lots of close friendships based on honesty. I don't need to be someone else to get others to like me. I am loved for me, he has to pretend and put all his bad feelings on me. He's pathetic, and I'm not wasting time caring. Idiot.
 
Exactly !!!
Put your energy into something you are going to get some sort of return on, its far less futile !!
 
Good morning Funny, am way behind with diary catch ups so have only skimmed through.

But am totally with Marge.

Take care and have a fab day xx
 
Not checked in for a few days. I had a deliberate 'day off' yesterday. I had to drive to Edinburgh and back an knew it would exhaust me, left at 9am, back at 3.30am, was very busy whike i was there. I didn't want to take a risk by driving with an empty fuel tank (me, not the car). I started off having chicken and salad, but before we left there were no decent choices. Ended up having a chicken wrap at a takeaway. I knew it would kick me out of ketosis, so had chips too. Thought I might as well as it would be months before I could again. I only regret it because I didn't have a nice day and would rather have stayed home and not have to go through the next 3 or 4 days again.
 
I don't feel regret or shame or anything. I'd decided before I left because I have been lacking energy on the diet, which I can make allowances for in my day to day life.

I think I'd rather have gone and had a stressful day, than not and worry I was missing out. Retrospective regret is silly.

I don't think I did too much damage. Even when I was eating naughty food, I stopped when I was full and didn't eat it all. It made me realise how 'healthy' takeaway choices don't exist. I will have to be organised with my own cooking in the future!
 
Hind sight is a wonderful thing eh ?
At least you have gotten through a difficult time relatively unscathed. If you feel you made the correct choices at that time, then you probably did.
The thing is, when you are a serial dieter, you know what are good and bad choices.....sometimes damage limitation is a bit of saving grace to keep you right. And if damage limitation comes in the form of a few chips, then so be it :)
But aye, you are correct, being more organised cooking wise may have been a better option. But that only works if you are in a position to do that in the time frame :)

New week now eh ? :D
 
Sorry I wasn't clearer!

I'm not enjoying getting back into ketosis. Boo.
 
Nor me :(
I woke up with a massive headache earlier. I'm not sure if it was ketosis induced, or dehydration.
 
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