I apologise in advance for the deepness.
1. I was raised in an environment where I was consistently put down. I remember continually being told that no-one would ever want me. I don't ever remember having (what I know now is) a healthy meal...I did not even taste some fruit/vegetables until I was an adult and could shop for myself. I wasn't allowed to go out much as a kid, therefore exercise was limited to P.E. and walking to and from school.
2. Following on from the 'no-one would ever want you' thing, I was in a consistent abusive situation...no one believed me because they thought surely no one in their right (wrong?) mind would deign to abuse someone who looked like me. Then, I got with someone who was NOT good for me, but I stayed, because I believed I could not do any better.
3. Became a single parent, but managed to get back down to pre-pregnancy weight...however, parenthood on my own with no support, trying to get a decent education (some teachers were downright evil to me....), losing friends etc. took it's toll....I gained 7st in 2 years.
4. From that point, my weight went up in years...2001 = 21st. 2002 = 22st etc.
5. I'm at my all time high weight now...from 1998 to 2010, I gained 18st....an average of 21lbs a year. The sad thing is I cannot tell you what I ate.....(everything?) it's like that entire period is a black hole in my memory. I went from walking everyday and maintaining my 14st frame (despite being called endless names) to being in pain from taking a few steps outside my home. But that first 7st gain? That is what I snowballed from...and I'm trying to come back from it now.
Whoa...never ever EVER even told anyone this, but I'm writing it here because....I don't know, no one ever asked me why...not even my doctor(s). I just now realised that I've never said it out loud... So yeah...I read all the other responses and I stared at this for 45 minutes before I really did feel brave enough to press..."submit reply".