aw Pixie, I'm so sorry to hear you had such a horrible time x
You poor little pet, well done on all you have achieved. You must be very brave. xx
So my story!, I think I was roughly a "normal" sized child - until about age 10, very chubby - got teased for being fat in school. Main reason, I had lived with my granny on and off til I was 8 and had healthy dinners etc.. but it was when (around 8) I was back with my mother full time that my weight shot up - she had a serious drink problem and dinners/meals/ breakfast didnt exist in our house - alot of food was trips to the chippers on the way home from the pub. ALOT. Then, I spent ALOT of time at home on my own when I was young, very isolated area and I was bored and lonely and filled my time with raiding the presses - never anything substansial in to eat but nearly always cheese and bread so lived on rubbish.
I remember being very body conscious even back then, zero confidence, constantly apologising for the smallest of things.
Then, at age 12, I went to 6.5 stone, I didnt realise at the time the seriousness of it but when I look back now as an adult I realise what was happening. I spent alot of time at my grannys, she would always lay out breakfast before school for me and I would put to cornflakes into the bowl with a drop of milk and put it in the sink to make it "look" like I had eaten. I used to insist on eating the dinners she gave me (my granny) in my room cos Id put them in the bin. I spent HOURS each night doing little exercises and easily up to an hour looking in the mirror telling myself how disgusting, ugly and fat I was. I wouldnt eat lunch at school and remember it got so bad that I once fainted (in a first aid course, funnily enough
)
My weight then piled on again - at around 14, 15, 16 - I probably hit around 14 stone (if not more).
I went from that to being a little bigger again, around 14.7 at 17/8 (years old) - I went to live in America and used to be sick after most meals, I probably dropped a stone and a half in two months or so..
I have to watch myself with this, even now as every now and then it does happen, not often, mind.
I then met OH, and when I became pregnant BALLOONED to 18 stone, probably a combination of feeling secure with him/ being obsessed with food anyway/ using pregnancy as an excuse to eat whatever I liked.
I've had such a crazy relationship with food - I'm completely obsessed with it - I think about it constantly. Im either one of two extremes - eating everything I see or not eating at all/ being sick. Delighted I found ww and here, it may sound dramatic but I feel, for the first time, Im developing a normal relationship with diet. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
