i just cant do it :(

Discussion in 'General Weight Loss Discussion' started by kirstyxox, 24 September 2010 Social URL.

  1. kirstyxox

    kirstyxox Member

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    i lost 10 ponds in two weeks, 2 weeks ago since then ive messed everything up again and prob put it all back on :'( ive had enough i just cant seem to do it its like im meant to be fat.. im getting really self concious.. I am seriously considering just staying home and not going out i hate myself :mad: i feel disgusted with myself for letting myself get so big and im also angry with myself because even though i feel like crying when i look in the mirror i cant seem to not eat junk and loose weight :mad::mad: i mean i cant even eat infront of people im that self concious yet i cant seem to be able to make myself loose weight :'( what can i dooooooo :'(
     
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  3. Lynn_

    Lynn_ On A Mission!

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    How old are you Kirsty? and how much weight do you need to lose. Have you been on a diet before? or was this the first time?
     
  4. welshgirl21

    welshgirl21 Silver Member

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    I've been exactly the same this week and am wondering if I just need to learn to accept myself at the weight that I am; I can't remember the last time I was under 12 st and saw an 11 on the scales (as the first number). I saw photos of myself at a friends wedding this week and I looked like a hippo but that wasn't enough to kick me into action, I watched a programme last night about weight loss surgery and they showed the organs covered in fat but even that wasn't enough.

    Just to say I really understand how you feel at the moment and I'm sure you will come through it, get over this little bump and get back on track. Try to keep smiling and be proud that you care enough about yourself to be concerned about it, sending you a ((( hug ))) and positive vibes.

    XX
     
  5. st.angelo

    st.angelo Full Member

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    There is a saying that goes, If you think you can or think you can't - You're right!

    Our eating habits are formed over many years, it's a tough thing to change and for many of us it's not something that can be done overnight.

    Getting yourself to think positive when you feel so low about yourself is very hard. Don't beat yourself up over this as you are making yourself feel worse. You do have the power within you to make a change in your diet and you can lose weight, it's up to you to make it happen and once you tell yourself that it is possible you can then decide which diet or eating plan to follow.

    I have just been looking at slendablenda's photo's and she lost 12 stone! That's a whole another person gone from her body! When she set out to lose weight she may have thought she couldn't do it but she damn well did do it!

    It can be done but at the moment you are feeling upset and all the energy you are using on feeling carp can be turned around and used as determination to suceed. You may well have days where it all seems too much and you may even succumb to chocolate or cake etc but you have to never give up and start each day determined to do well.

    I hope you can find a plan/diet that you feel is suitable - just have a look on here at how many different ones there are, for all budgets and lifestyles.

    You have nothing to lose but your weight. x
     
  6. kirstyxox

    kirstyxox Member

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    hiya no this isnt the first time.. tried for so long.. im 16.. im not sure how much but ive had enoughj of it :(
     
  7. kirstyxox

    kirstyxox Member

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    I know but im just sick of it :( specially when i see people my age eating whatever they want and stuff its so not fareee:'(
     
  8. kirstyxox

    kirstyxox Member

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    its amazing how people do it but i just cant do itt :( ive tried so much and all i want is to lose weight but i just cant really i cant ive tried so many times :(
     
  9. st.angelo

    st.angelo Full Member

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    Hi Kirsty, I have just read you are 16 years old. To me this throws a different light on things and I hope you won't find me patronising.

    I don't want to pry into your family background but I'm assuming it must be your mother/parents that buy the food at home. You don't have to say but are they overweight? It may be easier if you and your family tackle weightloss together.

    At any age it is difficult to cope with the emotions of being overweight but at 16 you have a lot of hormonal stuff going on not to mention as well as the normal teenage stuff involving boys, school/college etc so I appreciate why you are feeling so low about yourself and your weight.

    You say you have tried so many times before and failed although you did fantastic when you lost 10lb a few weeks ago. That was a huge achievement so it shows you can do it. So the problem seems to be that you can do it for awhile but then find it hard to keep it up.

    At your age I imagine that a lot of your social life involves meeting up in macdonalds and places like that. I'm an old bat and mother of two so don't have that problem but as my son is 15 I can see how most teenagers meet up in macdonalds and seem to spend a lot of time eating rubbish! Yes it's unfair that some of your friends eat all this stuff and don't put on weight but you have and do.

    Again, I don't want to pry but you need to tell someone in your family be it your mother, grandmother, father, whoever, how unhappy you are and that you need help. You are after all still a child (sorry I REALLY don't want to sound patronizing) and I don't think your losing weight is something you can do on your own at the moment.

    Aside from what you and all your friends eat, what are you eating at home as that is something your family can help you with. I urge my children to eat up because that is something that us mums do so do you feel guilty if you don't eat your tea?

    I also think you could benefit from seeing your GP especially if your family are overweight and taking your mum or whoever is your main parent along would show them that your health is at risk.

    I'm sorry, I don't know you personally so don't know what is going on in your life but I can see that you are an unhappy girl/young lady and that this should be a glorious time in your life. I feel that you are in a lot of pain and anguish and know that appearances really matter to young people and that they put huge pressure on themselves to fit in with their friends.

    Kirsty, please don't despair, you can lose weight but you need some help from your family/caring adult and possibly your GP. x
     
  10. Lynn_

    Lynn_ On A Mission!

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    Kirsty, St Angelo is absolutely right in what she says. I had a feeling you were in your teens which is why i asked the question. You say you dont know how much you need to lose, can you tell us how much you weigh and how tall you are?
     
  11. SammyE

    SammyE Silver Member

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    Aw Kirsty, dont be so hard on yourself, 10lbs in 2 weeks is amazing. What type of diet were you following?

    Start doing a food diary, just write down what you eat and when you eat it, do it over a couple of weeks then you can have a look and see what you could change without having to go on a drastic diet.

    I found talking about my weight really embarrassing when I was younger but sometimes what some people class as loads of weight to lose, is actually close to a healthy weight still, have you had a look at a bmi calculator? You put in your height and weight and it tells you if you are in a healthy weight for your height or not. How tall are you? Im 5ft4 and healthy weight for me ranges from 8 and a half stone to 10 and a half stone, you might be surprised and not have to lose as much weight as you think.

    And also remember that when you do diet, your only meant to lose around 2 or 3lbs a week.
     
  12. gina_b

    gina_b Les Mills Fitness Freak

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    10lbs in 2 weeks is much better than what ive been able do, same weight loss in 3 monthes, so well done on that!

    dont beat yourself up over it, you can do this, just gotta be strong and stay positive :)
     
  13. kirstyxox

    kirstyxox Member

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    Hi, Noo my parents and sisters/brothers arent overweight its just me :( yeah thats the thing i lost 10lb before but thats all i can do they i cant stick at it... yeahh we meet up at mcdonalds and basically only eat junk food... infact your looked at stupid if u sit there eating a bananna or apple because everyone else is eating chocoloate or whatever and saying *oh i could never sit there eating fruit looks so nerdy* so i cant even eat fruits/healthy stuff when im with friends thats whats soo annoying its like im not meant to do it :( Ive told my mum and she took me to the docs they just said that theres nowt they can do except for send me 2 a child nutritionist.. but i know i wouldnt be able 2 stick 2 it.. my mums tried helping me by making my meals thats how i lost 10 pounds but then i gave up im so fed up still :(
     
  14. kirstyxox

    kirstyxox Member

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    Im 5 1 i cudnt say my weight im too shamed but im a size 18 :(
     
  15. kirstyxox

    kirstyxox Member

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    hi i wasnt following no diet really just eating whatever my mum made me.. it obv worked because i lost 10lbs but ahh i just couldnt stick to it when all my friends are sat there eating choco/crips junk.. ive checked the BMI im overweight..
     
  16. kirstyxox

    kirstyxox Member

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    its just so hard when your so fat :( its so stressfull i hate absolutely hate it when we have to go for lunch break :(
     
  17. Starlight

    Starlight Gold Member

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    Dont rely on BMI to tell you if youre overweight. According to my brothers BMI hes overweight. Is he heck!!! Hes got not a pick on him, is extremely healthy, is a firefighter so does lots of physical work and has looks great. Yet according to his BMI he needs to lose weight. There are sooo many things BMI dont factor in, dont get hung up on figures like that x
     
  18. Lynn_

    Lynn_ On A Mission!

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    Kirsty, what do you think will happen if you are not prepared to let your mum help you? What will happen if you are not prepared to take responsibility for yourself and your own actions?

    You have every excuse why you cant lose weight, its the food, its your friends, its sitting round in macdonalds. Your mum must have made a wonderful effort for you if you lost 10lb in 2 weeks on what she prepared for you, but you have basically thrown that back in her face. What your friends say do and think seems to be far more important to you, than what your own mum is prepared to do for you.

    I think you need to apologise to her, and ask her for her help again. I also think you need to sit down and ask yourself if you are going to let your friends opinions keep you fat.

    When will it stop Kirsty? You are a size 18 now, so when will you decide that you are sensible enough to do something about it? When you are a size 24?

    Im sure you are a lovely intelligent girl, so you must be able to see that you are letting yourself down so badly, not to mention your poor mum. You need to join a club that will get you active and maybe you will then find friends that let you value yourself, and not worry over whether or not its 'cool' to eat an apple instead of fat laden salt laden burgers and chips.

    Sorry to be harsh but i think you need a wake up call.
     
  19. tarotwoman

    tarotwoman Loves life

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    Hi Kirsty,

    I know it's not really the best thing to do but sometimes it's easier to tell a white lie than the truth.

    If you only go for an odd McD's try having just a small burger and coke zero but no frys. If anyone says anything, just say your not hungry rather than you're dieting - it seem to work better.

    If you go most days then eat something like a sneaky low-low sandwich beforehand (Your mum sounds like she'd really help you by making it) and then just have coke zero and tell people you've already eaten.

    Tracey
     
  20. st.angelo

    st.angelo Full Member

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    Teenagers can say cruel things and when you sit in macdonalds 'joining in' with your friends you will get comments from your peers who will think and say nasty things like, "look at that fat girl stuffing her face".

    No one is saying you shouldn't meet up with your friends or sit there eating nothing. As Tracey has just said, you can say that you're not hungry or you're saving your money for something and have a diet coke and the caesar salad with grilled chicken. If you don't want to buy the salad then before you go out have a bowl of low fat/low sugar (bran?) cereal to fill you up and then just have the diet coke.

    Once you have started losing more weight you will want this more than you want a burger and fries. You will also want the respect of other teenagers and I'm sorry but you won't get it because sadly we live in a world where criticizing other peoples looks is a fact of life.

    No one said it is going to be easy but if your friends don't help support you then they aren't your real friends. They should help you not give into temptation.

    You need everyone on your side to give you support but most importantly you need to decide that you really, really want this change.

    Stay posting on here Kirsty because if you ever feel overwhelmed or want to give up or just to 'talk' to someone who doesn't know you in real life we are all here to help. x
     
  21. ally229

    ally229 Member

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    Hi Kirsty,

    Being 16 and overweight is not easy, trust me I know the feelings you are going through! Over the years i've had similar feelings. Let's be really honest, I still sometimes feel like weight loss is impossible! I've found that for me the best way to lose weight is to make small changes gradually. Rather than saying "right Im going on a diet" I now say "from today I'm going to cut down or stop eating junk food" or what ever, I do that for a few weeks then introduce something new. I found it helped me.

    Do you talk to friends and family about your weight and how it makes you feel? I know how annoying it is to have friends who can eat whatever they like and not put on weight! A friend of mine ate a whole family size trifle and then had a whole eal at Nandos and shes tiny!!!!!

    I know the feelings of wanting to lose weight, but trying and losing the weight is so much harder! Specially when you've got school and stuff.

    I think you're amazing that your trying to tackle you weight! I generally tried to brush it under the carpet and avoid eating with peple....as you can can guess that didnt do ay good! But like I said earlier try just making little changes.

    I dont now if you would be interested but most GPs can refer you to special exercise programs, basically its like going to the gym except everyone is in a similar position to you! As for the child nutrionist, maybe give it a go and see what they have to say?!?!

    Anyway, if you want to talk, well post/chat, I'm happy to chat.

    Take care Xxx
     
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