jet's take on a diary !!!

hi all sorry ive not been on feeling a bit down in the dumps ,so im doing dukan but with a few treats thrown in has im not consentrating really well !!!

its to do with the girl at work she spoke to my boss on friday and said i was upsetting her with keep talking about dan ,so i was called in the office on monday my boss spoke to me ,and i was really upset with what he said then the girl came in ,we eneded up having a heated slanging match ,crying more and more but we are ok and we still work together ,it has really upset me !!!!!
 
aww hunny thats so unfair. I suppose shes never had a loss and wont understand till she does .....
You come in here and chat away when you need to xxxxx
 
hi scrumps u are right she has never lost a child but she has lost her mum and i feel for her because of that !!!!!!! thanks scrumps !!!!!!!
 
hi jaqys ,im just confused with it all and im trying to brush it to one side i think thats why im not consentrating to well !!!!!!!!!

thank hunny to !!!!!
 
Oh Jet, if you need to talk about Dan you can use us any time you need. Your colleague should be more sensitive about you wanting to talk about him as she has lost her Mum and it's great therapy. I know everyone's different, but I had to talk (about my baby and latterly about my Mum) to make sure they weren't forgotten by others and to confirm that they'd existed for everyone and not just for me and mine. If your colleague doesn't need to talk then that's fine too, but she shouldn't prevent you from doing so. Death isn't catching, so she's not going to jinx herself by letting you talk about your lovely son.

Sorry, have waffled again. Take care, Jet. xxx
 
i agree with Laura hun ...I would of thought with losing her mum she would be a bit more compationate.......but then some people just cant deal with it suppose xxx
 
hi lovley's ur such wonderful ladies she used to be a really good listener and i dont know wot has happened to her ,i know we need to talk about different things and i understand this ,so im making a consience effort to try and be jolly lol i dont know i feel like im a right misery guts ,i need a good shaking !!!!!!!
 
You don't need a good shaking, Jet. You need a friendly ear and a big hug. Be kind to yourself. xxx
 
thanks sweetheart !!!!! thats my prb i never put myself first !!!!!!!!!!
 
Oh jet, thats such a shame. Thats not very nice of her to pull you up to your boss about it. I would have been the same as you and been really upset. Its one thing loosing a parent as they do tend to go before us, but our children should be here till long after we are gone. Lets just hope shes never in the position you are in Jet. Big , big love and hugs, go easy on yourself, its not easy dealing with ignorance xxx
 
Hi Hon - i cant believe that girl. fair enough she has lost her mum and if she doesnt want to talk about it thats up to her. xxx
big hugs xxx
 
Hey Jet,

hope you get through this. We're all different and maybe she is reminded about losing her mum when you talk about Dan, but she can't/won't talk about it, so she doesn't want you to indirectly remind her. She should have spoken directly to you though, not gone straight to your boss that's just not on! I hope you can find a middle ground and make up.

As for people not speaking their mind and letting it build till it's too late: I virtually fell out with a flatmate (we were 6) as a student, one day she let it all out and I had had NO IDEA!! That was a tearful day and hard to recover from. It was a lot of little things that were no big deal if she'd SAID. Anyway I think most people were 'on my side' that time but it made it no better. On the other hand I'm still quite direct (the German genes) at times and have managed to upset people by (gently) saying things as they are (and no, I don't suffer from Tact-deficiency as my mum does).

Why are the English so complicated **very big grin**

Good luck Jet - just speak about Dan with your other supportive friends who appreciate it, and stick to the weather with this colleague. Hard I know...
 
I'm glad I'm following Anja's kind message because, while I'd not have reacted as your colleague did, I'd find it hard to be reminded of my Mum's death at work. It's more wanting to keep a stiff upper lip at work and I know that we're all very different in our reactions etc etc and I'm babbling... and yes we are complicated Anja! haaaa!

I like to think that I'd support Jet if she were my colleague and wanted to talk often about her son, but I'd definitely have to block out my own feelings cos it'd be too raw for me...

<and you know I love ya Jet!>
 
jaqys said:
Did she bring it up with you before going to your boss?

Sigh, some people just live for the drama.
Click to expand...

hi jaqys no she spoke to my boss first and he said it was a difficult one to deal with and about !!!

my oh says she just jealous ah well !!!!!!!! i dont know y she should be jealous though !!!
 
thank you everyone for ur messages ur all such wonderful ladies !!!!!!!

there are just me and this girl in the room we work in and we generally get on really well and we still do ,the atmosphere is fine now and we are putting it to one side and maybe getting in out in the open has cleared the air ............. but i still need to deal with this in my head (y are minds so difficult to suss ) but all in all it's done and dusted and we need to move on but my wall is up and im god dam sure im not going to get hurt again !!!!!!!!!!

THANK YOU TO ALL MY WONDERFUL DUKAN FRIENDS " I LOVE YA ALL " .........
 
Aww jet, glad the atmosphere is okay when working.
Hope you can rebuild a bit.

Yes heads can take a lot of sorting out, make sure you pick the right things to dwell on.
 
Aww its really difficult isnt it. I get what Jo says too completely.
Still now you know how she feels about it you can both move on

Lots of Love Jet xxx
 
Aww glad atmosphere is ok Jet :D
 
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