Jules LL Diary

[gracielou09]

Big mistake...I read your replies during lunch ...I really need to get some water proof mascara!!!!!

I cannot find the words to explain how you made me feel, or my gratitude to you all for your posts. You really are such wonderful people ...I only wish we all lived near each other. You show such support, unconditionally, well I'm blown away.... Thank you doesnt seem enough, but I mean it from the bottom of my heart.

Speechless…verbal d has gone lol!!

Love you all to bits ...which is weird cos I've never met any of you ....xxxxxxxxx

 

[gracielou09]

Hello Lovely!

Was wondering where you been hiding. Brave of you to put it all down here. Never EVER feel that you will bring any of us down by posting - jeesh This IS the place to let it all out hun and you would probably be helping someone else out in the process who is feeling the same way.
One thing popped into my mind when you mentioned 'food thoughts'.
Better the devil you know - I believe is the saying for this. I think this is why we tend to turn to our comfort foods(the devil) and wanna cheat when feeling low...worthless, depressed...yadda yadda yadda. The outcome is always predictable with that devil.

Shame about the job but...you are meant for better things?. Try to look at it that way rather than the negative. It can be so hard to see the forrest for the trees some days and I know you worked so hard and had high hopes to get this job but sometimes what we want and what we get are 2 different things. Something will come along that will be mucho better and rewarding for you

Verbal diarrhea is GOOD!! Great way to get all those emotions out that have built up over the years. Really makes you wonder where all these feelings have been hiding. Once out, you can now start dealing with them rather than bottling them up for a more...ahem...convenient time (btw, we never allow a convenient time to happen)
Guess as we change on this plan, the more we must face up to ill patterns/habbits. So no worries hun, we all must/will/have/about to/currently deal with this....and it isn't pleasant
I get moody after meetings and then in deep thought and ...ugh...REFLECT.

Swimming lessons sound interesting! Great way to conquer a fear in a controlled environment AND prove to yourself that you can do things and are not limited at all. This will OPEN a window up that you never thought existed before. How exciting is that? To find out that you are capable of things you never thought possible.

Peel that onion my dear and reveal then shed those layers - scary yes...vulnerable- you betchya...but you will discover the real you, and will love yourself for this.

Oh..and 2stone in 8 weeks? WELL DONE!!! That is a huge loss - do yourself a favour and carry 6 x 5kg bags around with you for an hour and see if you can do it. Betchya cant

xx

Weebs your just awesome. Really meant a lot to me that you took the time to write such a lovely post...

The devil has a lot to answer for and that bloody onion too

I will take on board everything you said, everything you said is so true. And I'm a great believer in whats meant to be will be ...you cant force it.

Thank you so much
xxxxxx

 

[gracielou09]

Ah sweet girl dont hide away from us!!!

And dont rush into the swimming - no pressure - do it when you are ready.

Please feel free to use this space to express yourself - the rest of us do.

Kisses xx

Thanks for your support Han, I promise not to hide away anymore but share ...it felt good to write it down even though it took me a couple of days...I'm not normally a moany moo, Just this LL journey is affecting me in ways I never imagined and has taken me a bit by suprise tbh.

Big hugs xxx

 

[gracielou09]

Firstly congrats on ur 2 stone loss, secondly well done u on thking on the swimming challenge and thirdly... 41?!!! NOWAY i thought u were 20 something xxxx

Firstly, thank you for your post Gem and secondly thank you for the compliment ....trying my hardest to accept a compliment ..think we all struggle with that devil.

Just looking at your pics ....you look amazing ...wow what a transformation hun ...Big congrats to you too xxxx

 

[gracielou09]

Morning lovely girl. Good post from yourself and also Weebs. Dont hide away, come on here post, rant , bring your little black cloud with you and we can all huddle with you under your cape of sorrow till it passes. As pass it does, both the good and the bad.

Ah pooo just deleted half my post ! The gist of it was choose the life that you fancy leading. If you want to prioritise the important thinks in your life such as hubby and daughter good for you. If you want to add something else for you in terms of a hobby or sommat go for it. Some of us are life's busy people with hobbies and stuff some like myself choose to life more simple lives. As long as you feel fulfilled you go for it.

Fear of water. Eek can relate to that, as I had a fear of depths. Managed to get over it but still not great, and still a poor swimmer.

Keep on trucking xx

Thank you for your lovely post ...I couldnt have said it better myself ....a little black cloud is exactly it, but th rain has stopped and the sun is trying to shine through....so hopefully after a good weekend it will be bright sunshine from next week.

Daught and hubs are my world but I know I need summit for little Jules . If I could get over my fear of depth etc I know I can achieve anything.

Big hugs hun xxxxxx

 

[gracielou09]

Hey gorgeous, what a very honest post! You are so brave to share it, you have taken step one in admitting you have a fear, that's a really difficult thing to do! I am a boredom eater, I also resonate with your comment about having no hobbies which is why the cheeky Chester came into my life. I used to sit at home every night on my own. Omg i sound like a sad loser! Now if something is going on with friends I make the effort to get involved. I think the confidence this plan has given me is amazing, I always believed that I was a very outgoing bubbly person. The reality was when I did go out I would use my friends as a shield and would enjoy myself through them and not on my own merrits!

Sorry kinda went into a 'me' moment and ranted!

Basically I think you are amazing, your weight loss has and will continue to be brilliant and your confidence grow beyond recognition. There is nothing you cannot achieve in life. Ask, believe & receive it's yours for the taking. I would give longer term goals some thought to in the form of hobbies, just because you have a family it doesn't mean you can't have outside interests these are the things that will keep you sane and enjoy the family all the more.

I hope some of what I say helps. Don't be a stranger here, what you are going through and feeling will be either what someone else has or will be in the future, we are all here to make this journey just that little bur easier by supporting each other hun. 41 same as me chick, wish I looked like as good as you gorgeous xxx

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Lovely Lady T, a lot of what you said helped esp "I make the effort to get involved. I think the confidence this plan has given me is amazing, I always believed that I was a very outgoing bubbly person. The reality was when I did go out I would use my friends as a shield and would enjoy myself through them and not on my own merrits!" thats so me. I dont want people to think I'm pushy etc I always though I was outgoing too but you described me to a T. thats why I didnt post ...would ahte for people to think ...who does she think she is etc. I need to stop that.

Oh and btw ...you are stunning young lady, inside and out.

Thankyou so much for your post

xxx

 

[gracielou09]

Jules honey. I will write a longer reply later as I need to start getting ready for work now...
First of all though let me tell you that you are AMAZING and don't you dare thinking you can't share your thoughts with us! Erm... Have you read my diary?! I had some seriously dark moments lately and you lot have stuck by me no matter what!
What makes you think we won't be here for you too??!!
You are doing just great. Look at the smaller and bigger breakthroughs you've had lately! Just amazing!
I need you to gather the courage and go find those swimming lessons and do it!
It will feel so great when you conquer your fears!
Sending you lots of love huni bun xxx

Sent from my iPhone 4 using MiniMins

This wonderful lady is the reason I joined LL. Thank you so much for your post huni.

Like I said ...I dont like to feel I'm pushing myself on anyone and I feel like my woes are so insignificant to some of the ting you guys are going through...but I will keep posting, promise ...it did help a lot to get it all down. and helped even more hwne I read the replies

I have found a place that does 1 to 1 swimming lessons so I have the number and will ring on the weekend to see whats what. I'll keep you posted.

Thanks so much for all your support huni

Big hugs

xxxxx

 

[Gembritney]

Julz!!!!! i wish we all lived closer too!!!!! we are all in the same situation and we know how u feel. we are here for u ok anytime u need us xxx

 

[gracielou09]

Julz!!!!! i wish we all lived closer too!!!!! we are all in the same situation and we know how u feel. we are here for u ok anytime u need us xxx

Thanks huni, means a lot xxxxx

 

[LadyT]

Aw glad my post helped! Keep smiling beautiful xx

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[weebles]

Speechless…verbal d has gone lol!!

Love you all to bits ...which is weird cos I've never met any of you ....xxxxxxxxx

When and if we do ever meet? I am the good looking one in the crowd

 

[weebles]

Glad you are better today.
See how appreciated you are on here? Loads of support right at your finger tips.
Would be fantastic if we all lived closer and give each other the HUGE hugs we all deserve. Never EVER can have enough hugs (apparently).....Still working on that btw....

xx

 

[gracielou09]

Just been catching up on all the diaries, some newbies I need to catch up with too. Cant keep up lol.

Good to see SB back posting and on the mend

WI tomorrow, looking forward to class and seeing the girls. This week hasnt been as tuff as last week, thank goodness, my frame of mind is better. But I've decided to change my goal from 9 stone to 10 stone. If I lose on RTM, which i know some ladies have, then great. But I know at 10 stone I'll be a comfortable 12....and thats fine with me

I've have a 1to1 swimming lesson booked for a week thursday ....OMG!!! She will assess me and take it from there OMG again!

xxxxxx

 

[sexychick]

Just been catching up on all the diaries, some newbies I need to catch up with too. Cant keep up lol.

Good to see SB back posting and on the mend

WI tomorrow, looking forward to class and seeing the girls. This week hasnt been as tuff as last week, thank goodness, my frame of mind is better. But I've decided to change my goal from 9 stone to 10 stone. If I lose on RTM, which i know some ladies have, then great. But I know at 10 stone I'll be a comfortable 12....and thats fine with me

I've have a 1to1 swimming lesson booked for a week thursday ....OMG!!! She will assess me and take it from there OMG again!

xxxxxx

You will be ok hun,your swimming instructor will look after you,you are so good to be facing your fear,in weeks to come you will be thinking what all the fuss was about plus you will be swimming when you get to goal,double whammy!!
Then you will feel on top of the world for been such a strong fabulous woman for doing so well,in swimming and your brilliant weight loss,fab!!
Good luck and be brave!
Sexy xx

 

[LadyT]

Hi beautiful, glad you are in a better place. I too have re-evaluated my goal and taken it from 10 stone to 11 stone there must be something in the water lol

Good luck for WI. xx

 

[gracielou09]

You will be ok hun,your swimming instructor will look after you,you are so good to be facing your fear,in weeks to come you will be thinking what all the fuss was about plus you will be swimming when you get to goal,double whammy!!
Then you will feel on top of the world for been such a strong fabulous woman for doing so well,in swimming and your brilliant weight loss,fab!!
Good luck and be brave!
Sexy xx

Thanks for your words of encouragement huni, means a lot.

Had to laugh, when I rang the swimming instructor, initially I said I was enquiring about 1to1 swimming lessons, she asked how old was my child, I said 41 ...ad its me. She said she was 53 when she learnt which made me feel a little better.

Glad your staying on this forum too ..xxx

 

[gracielou09]

Hi beautiful, glad you are in a better place. I too have re-evaluated my goal and taken it from 10 stone to 11 stone there must be something in the water lol

Good luck for WI. xx

Must be summit in the air so you only have 12lbs to lose ...wow hun thats amazing. You seem to be coping with the food too. Your doing so well.

Oh and after reading about your night out last sat, next time I go out with the girls to Cardiff you are invited (and whoever else would like to come), I promise you wont feel down after it lovely..... xxxxxx

xxx

 

[LadyT]

Must be summit in the air so you only have 12lbs to lose ...wow hun thats amazing. You seem to be coping with the food too. Your doing so well.

Oh and after reading about your night out last sat, next time I go out with the girls to Cardiff you are invited (and whoever else would like to come), I promise you wont feel down after it lovely..... xxxxxx

xxx

Hello gorgeous!

I know 12lb to go, not sure I m coping with the food as much as I could be purely down to me feeling like the choices have been taken away from me being forced onto Lite. I am getting there though and will cook some recipes out of the LLL cookbook this week.

OOoooo a night out in cardiff, might take you up on it. You are special hunny at making people feel good xx

 

[gracielou09]

Hello gorgeous!

I know 12lb to go, not sure I m coping with the food as much as I could be purely down to me feeling like the choices have been taken away from me being forced onto Lite. I am getting there though and will cook some recipes out of the LLL cookbook this week.

OOoooo a night out in cardiff, might take you up on it. You are special hunny at making people feel good xx

Huni, your cooking, thats a massive achievement as i know you say your not good at it, I'm obsessing on cooking programmes at the mo..weird. You are coping very well, esp with all you have on our plate. Your a strong woman and can achieve anything you want - i have no doubt about that. a lot of people would have given up put in your situation with your blood and having the choice taken away. You behaved like an adult and thats what this journey teaches us. Ok so your water intake hasnt been as good as usual, but if thats the only thing then your doing pretty bloody fantastic if you ask me.

If ever you want to come back to wales for a night out you get in touch misses. Offer always there - i mean that.

xxx

 

[Julslynne]

Awe Welshy Hun. Just been reading your diary and the posts from the lovely girls. I had tears reading them. They are a super bunch of girls. You will get over your fear in your own time. Don't push yourself. Do it when your ready. As for the job. Well done on the feed back. I'm sure you'll be inline for the next one. I havn't posted much lately but I have been reading the diaries. My LLC contacted me tonight to suggest I go to RTM to understand what food works for me and to maintain the weight I've already lost. Bless. She's been really good to me. I feel really guilty for giving up as I've had so much support but I just couldn't stomach it any longer. I will give it some thought though. SW going good so far. Missing you all. Have a lovely evening chick.

Hugs and kisses

XxJulesxX