need to lose at least 30lbs by end of March 2017-- going to be a Bride!

[littlemisspiggy16]

Wow, that is high!! What is it, a cereal bar type thing? X

 

[Pinkemi]

Yeah they are oaty buiscut type things.. I guess you would call them a ceral bar!

 

[Pinkemi]

I am having one of those moments where I just feel discouraged.. (again.) So instead of stuffing my face with things I shouldnt, I thought I would come on here and moan.

I'm feeling better about myself generally.. like for example we saw someone on sunday who I haven't seen in months and the first thing she said was "You look like you have lost loads!" Well yeah I have.. but its just not enough.. and it's not going fast enough!

I HATE the fact that I didn't try harder earlier on.. because I could have been there by now... at goal.. at target..!
I HATE the fact that my dress size just doesn't seem to be changing. I'm still a size 18 waist.. still not able to fit into a size 16.. and this upsetts me.
I HATE the fact that the measurements that I WANT to change aren't changing. Id like my hips and lower belly to be getting smaller, and my boobs. (actually boobs i've gone down a cup size so I can't use this.) yes my legs look like they are toning up a little and maybe my arms (but again not fast enough.)

I keep looking at my countdown of how many weeks I have left until my wedding day and basically pooping my pants over it.

I have 12 weeks.. basically.. to lose about 26lbs.... which is 2lbs a week. I'm really beginning to think that it just isnt realistic anymore. I'm trying the hardest I can but I am only human,... I WILL screw up at some points (like I did on sunday with too many glasses of wine) but I don't have the time to screw up. That's the point.

I know I am probably being stupidly hard on myself but I REALLY REALLY do not want to get married in my current state. I want to be able to look back on my pictures and be happy with them.. Not worry about how I might look. gah!

 

[littlemisspiggy16]

Aw, sorry to hear you feel so down about things. But well done for coming on here instead of stuffing your face. I know it's really frustrating how slow things seem to go, but I think it's also much harder to see changes in ourselves than it is in other people. At the moment there are so many days when I think I look exactly the same as I did this time last year, however the jeans that now fit me again prove otherwise. I know it's really difficult but try not to fixate too much on having to lose 26 or x number of pounds. 12 weeks may not be very long BUT it's definitely long enough to make a noticeable difference. Xx

 

[Pinkemi]

Sorry for being such a moaning minny.. but I really don't deal with stress very well! I've been overweight basically most of my life.. and my family are putting a bit of pressure on me now to lose the weight before the big day. I KNOW in my heart that I would feel better if I lost a bit more... coz I really don't want to look back on the photos and hate them. It's just happening so slowly.. hard to keep that momentum up I guess.

SW weigh in later.. I'm not feeling positive. Got home and ate a big bowl of apple crumble and custard.. Meaning I ate at maintenance calories yesterday. No doubt it will be a gain.

 

[littlemisspiggy16]

No need to apologise, I'm exactly the same. Have also struggled with my weight my entire life & am not good with stress. Am such a comfort eater, which then makes me even more stressed as I know it doesn't exactly help with weight loss!! I also find it difficult when other people put pressure on me. My family sometimes comment on my weight, and it usually drives me to binge eat. Again I know it's a completely stupid reaction but I just can't seem to help it

You will look amazing on your wedding day, even if you're not quite at target. 12 weeks is still enough time to make a very noticeable difference so just keep thinking of how gorgeous you're going to look & hopefully that'll help with the motivation xx

 

[Pinkemi]

So.. 0.5lb gain for me this week. To be honest I'm not surprised as I really didnt follow to plan on Sunday and I ate far too many syns on Monday evening. NEED TO SNAP BACK ON IT!!

Ive been calorie counting now for so long that I think its too easy for me to slip back into that mindset of.. "well ive exercised for 30mins.. burnt 200 calories so thats another 200 calories that I can eat." But i don't just eat 200 calories... I eat too many more, log it and go.. oh well.. I'll be better tomorrow. I truly am obsessed with food!

I think the week that I lost3.5lbs is the week that I really planned! I took masses of snacks with me to work and only ate them.. nothing OFF plan as such. I need to get back into that mindset.

My exercise habit is getting better (I missed yesterday's workout but I hope to make up for it today.) But this isnt going to help with the overall FAT loss unless I truly work out my eating habits. just..GRR. bloody stupid. I don't have time to be screwing up.

I bought myself one of those wasit trainers to try and sculpt my wasit a little better when I am exercising.. except I am now looking at it and thinking.. what the bloody hell did I buy this for? *Sigh* I think I am clutching at short straws. :-(

 

[Pinkemi]

So we have homemade apple crumble in the fridge.. I just worked out the syns and one portion of Apple crumble with custard is going to take me to 16syns.

So.. My aim is to have just free food throughout the day and to have this as my treat later. But I can only have it if I do my workout too.. Deal?! lol

Breakfast- 2x fried Egg, 3 bacon medalions and 4 cherry tomatoes

Syns
Apple crumble- 11 syns
Custard- 5syns

Total- 16syns

 

[Pinkemi]

Lunch- Rocket with sweetcorn, a tin of tuna and beetroot.

Was tempted to put some dressing on it and then remembered I am saving my syns for the crumble. *drools*

Done my work out! Tempted to try and do another later depending on how im feeling as it felt a bit easy?

 

[littlemisspiggy16]

Enjoy the crumble! Not had a homemade apple crumble in years! Xx

 

[Pinkemi]

So.. i enjoyed the crumble a lot! But I enjoyed it a little bit too much and had a second helping. So syns yesterday were way over... Again!

I have been trying to count my calories at the same time as doing Slimming world via My Fittness pal. I originally had my calories set at 1,200 and was then exercising to try and "gain" more calories back to eat. This morning I changed my calorie goal to 1,600. I was... I am getting slightly obsessed over calories and what I should and shouldn't be eating. So I am going to try and focus more on good food choices instead of how many calories it might have! The exercsise I am still going to do and will log out of curiosity but I wont be using it as an excuse to eat more.

Breakfast- 1 slice of bacon and a pink lady apple, Mcvities oaty breakfast bar thing (woke up late and had a grab and go brekkie! lol)
Lunch- Cajun chicken breast with baked onions, pepper and chick peas with rocket on the side.
Snacks- 3x light babybel and 3x seafood sticks.

HEA- Babybel

Syns
Micvities oaty breakfast bar thing- 9.5 syns

Total- 9.5 syns

 

[Pinkemi]

So today is a write off.. Just had horrible news that a friend of mine has terminal cancer.. and before I knew it I'd eaten everything in sight.

 

[littlemisspiggy16]

I'm so so sorry to hear your sad news, it must be such a shock. Has your friend been ill for a while or was it completely out the blue? I hope you can make the most of whatever time you have together. Xx

 

[Pinkemi]

To be honest.. No.. It came completely out of the blue. What makes it worse is that she is based in America and I can't get over there. Has to be the worst news I could have recieved.

Needless to say i am struggling not to eat everything and anything today. I always have a tendancy to want to eat when I am feeling overly emotional. Trying to throw myself into my work but as its a bit boring.. it's not helping very well! lol

 

[Pinkemi]

So this weekend was a write off for food and exercise. I ate tons of rubbish and didnt exercise at all... So this morning I'm feeling bloated and sluggish. Tomorrow wont be a good weigh in, that's for sure!

Spoke to the family planning nurse this morning on the phone and she started having a mini go at me for my weight.. telling me about how dangerous it is for obese women to have babies... etc etc. She wouldn't listen to me when I told her that I was dieting because she was like "Well from our records it looks like you have been overweight and /or obese for quite a few years now." I wanted to punch her and had to remind her that the call was for sorting out my cycle for my wedding day and NOT about how overweight I am.

Food wise today:

Breakfast- porridge made with milk and chopped mango
Lunch- Cajun chicken breast with chick peas, pepper and onions. Served with carrotts and baby sweetcorn.
Snacks- 2x light babybel and a pink lady apple.

HEA- Semi skimmed milk
HEB- dunno.

Syns-
Babybel- 4
Caramel rice cakes- 2syns

Total- 6 syns

 

[solange]

Steady now Pink, don't let her get you down like that! Think of your lovely wedding dress etc. etc. Jeez some of the so called professionals!! Thinking too of your friend in the US. Terrible for you too but no excuse to eat yourself witless, huh?!! Anyway, chin up and battle on. xx

 

[littlemisspiggy16]

I hate it when nurses lecture you like that! The nurse I usually see always goes on about my weight, I find it sooo annoying as she's twice the size of me!! Always feel like making some kind of comment, like if it was so easy then I'm sure she'd also be slim! But I'm way too shy/polite, haha. Xx

 

[Pinkemi]

I know.. I need to snap back into thinking about how i am going to look in my dress. Woke up in a mild panic as I realised it is in about 89 days.... I basically have 12 weeks to drop as much as posssible. Think I need to find more time to exercise.. When I was marathon training and out running most nights, I managed to drop a few lbs really easily! (I was also exhausted all the time.. but its got to be worth it right?!)

LittlemissPiggy.. I think that would wind me up terribly if someone heavier then me was lecturing me about losing weight! But i would also be too polite (like you) to say anything.

 

[Pinkemi]

Oh Dear.. I think my personal trainer and the slimming world plan are going to clash.

He has tasked me with having a "green smoothie" in the morning for breakfast to help kick my weight loss into gear... It has seeds *gasp* and Avacado *big gasp* in it! There go my syns for chocolate.

Offical weigh in today! Not quite sure what the scales are going to say as I had a rubbish weekend of food. Was so bloated when I weighed myself on Sunday morning. However I had a sneaky weigh in this morning and I am LOVING the result. Just have to not eat too much today so it doesn't make me heavier. lol To be fair there is always a 2-3lb difference between my scales at home and the scales at SW.

Breakfast- green smoothie (Kale, Spinach, Banana, half an avacado, handful of seeds, almond milk and water.)
Lunch- Garlic and Herb chicken thigh with salad, mushrooms, cherry tomatoes and baby sweetcorn.

HEA- 3x light babybel

Syns
Avacado- 5 syns
Seeds- 9 syns

Total- 14 syns

 

[Pinkemi]

HA HA! Ive just looked up to see if Seeds are on the Healthy B list and they are!!! "2 level dessert spoons pumpkin seeds" This is what I had. So 5 syns for my half an avacado. WOO HOOO!

HEA- 3x light babybel
HEB- 2 level dessert spoons pumpkin seeds

Syns
Avacado- 5 syns


Total- 5 syns