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OT: thought i'd ask my friends for some support not Lt related tho

Saddia

im gonna do it!
#2
Awwww sweetheart-youve been thru so much in such a small amount of time! ur eldest is probably feelin the tension in the house so reacted like this. I assure u she probs wanted a bit of attention and that was her way of sayin 'im here too!' I know it sounds silly but us women r made to take on all the stress and this also makes us stronger 2. Ive got a 3 year old and a baby and the things my 3 year olds done just for attention r evil too but thats just kids. just remember that u have 1 relationship with the other half and 1 with ur kids, and dont let 1 affect the other. I dont know if i sound like an idiot but I hope things work out for u I really do. Youve also lost a baby and that is the worst thing for a mother, its not easy but will get easier coping with ur loss. u just have to be strong for ur kids. Its a good idea to take some time apart and whatever went wrong in your relationship theres only 1 answer-communication. without this u cant achieve any thing xxx
 
#3
thanks saddia, we basically just grew apart he moved out told me he still loved me wanted me back wasnt going to give up on us blah blah and within 3 days he was in bed with another woman. but i forgave him and we got back together i'm not sure if its that thats getting in the way the fact i know he slept with someone else after only 3 days apart.
 

Saddia

im gonna do it!
#4
Yeah thats gonna be hard to accept. thats a typical reaction for a bloke! idiots! we would cry n cry n they go n sleep with a girl. It musnt have meant anyfin just an emotional thing! does that make sense? If u wanna make a go of things u have to try ur hardest to let go emotionally of the fact that this happened, i know its easier said than done but it will eventually happen. If u still love him n he loves u too then give it a go 1 step at a time, dont rush anything, thats 1 stupid mistake he made n dont let that ruin what was a beautiful relationship. u had kids together , he loves u n its obvious u love him. try ur best to forget that mistake n slowly everythin will be at its best! Good luck hun!
 
#6
Hi Kelly, I'm sorry to hear about al your hardships recently, and I hope this post finds you feeling a little better. Children do al kinds of things to get attention (working in a behaviour-challenged school I see it all day long), and of course they don't know that's what they are doing, they just act out without being aware of the consequences.

Losing a child must be so hard on you, and it's not something I have personal experience of. My best friend's Mum lost a child about 8 years ago, and I know it doesn't feel like it now, but she has said to me herself, that it does get easier with time.

As for you OH, well
thats a typical reaction for a bloke! idiots! we would cry n cry n they go n sleep with a girl


sadly thats true. If a bloke is dumped/breaks up with a girl, and his confidence is hitting low, the first thing he'll do to prove he's "still manly" is to sleep with the first woman who is willing to. As was said, it would purely have been an insecurity thing on his part, but as he says he still loves you of course it does reek a little of the jealousy game too.

If you only feel like yourself while your OH was away, then perhaps you need to make a regular weekly timeslot that is YOUR time, away from him, the kids and your responsabilities as a mother/wife; if he really does love you (and not just what you do for him) then he'll understand - you can make it one of your "rules" that oyu are basing your fresh start with him on.

I hope it all works out for you.
x
 

kelly22_1

loves minimins
#7
but as he says he still loves you of course it does reek a little of the jealousy game too

Hi pete, i just wondered what you mean by jealousy on my part or his?? I already know he has insecurity issues as he won't let me go out on a friday/sat night with my friends then says its not you i dont trust its the other men.
 
#8
I meant that, from my (i.e. another blokes) perspective, the fact that he slept with another woman so quick and saw fit to tell you about it translates as "see, I can get other women like *that*, you should be grateful for having me" and thus trying to make you jealous and so get back with him.

sorry if that sounds discouraging hun x
 
#9
hiya love I am so sorry to hear you are going through a crappy time have you got a close friend to talk to.
Have you had some counselling with regards to losing your baby it may not feel like you want to talk to anyone but bottling it up inside wont help you dont worry about losing weight at the moment you have enough on your plate Having just been diagnosed with depression I think i can recognise some symptons within you may I suggest you go see the dr and have a good long chat with them if they offer tablets take them they will help
If you want to PM by all means do so I will listen to anything you have to say and wil help all I can

xx
all the best
 


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