Stay at home mums - your routine

big bear

big bear

A bear on a mission!
Morning all

Hope you are all well. I just wondered if those stay at home Mums with little one's could tell me your daily routine (roughly).

My 2 year old has started not going to bed till gone 11pm :eek: but he's still up between 6am-7am. I'm just wondering if I'm not doing enough with him etc. Do you play/entertain your child all day or let them play alone?

I just want to find out what you do & try to get us back into a routine

We wake between 6am-7am but stay in bed for cuddles & watch Milkshake.

8am - Out of bed (Should I just get up with him when he wakes?)

8am-8.30am - Get breakfast we play either drawing, building blocks

9am - Daddy usually comes in from work sometimes plays with him (should be more but as you know issues there)

Then we play either with his trucks, trains, blocks etc till lunchtime which is 12.30

Then I try & get him to go for a nap but at the moment he's not going to sleep till 2/2.30pm then sleeps for an 1.5hrs...do you think he no longer needs a nap? (he's 26mths old)

He then gets up plays again, have dinner between 6-6.30pm...then we do the bedtime routine which is teeth, jammies on, some reading etc sometimes bath but not every night...should he have a bath each night?

I put him in bed (cot bed) for 7.30pm but he's not going to sleep till late. I am guilty of him watching Thomas DVD's. He's got used to the TV on because H won't sleep without TV & now he wants it on, should I stop this now or is it too late?

Also the TV is on all day in the background, should I stop that also & only have certain times?

Do you sit & play with them all day or let them play by themselves most of the day?

I do the tidying/cleaning once he's in bed. Should i just get on with my house-work etc & let him play on his own then spend time in the evening with him?

I've also got a baby (3.5 months old) she just sleeps/sits in her chair playing with her rattle/toys etc. She's in bed the same time as my son & wakes when he does in the morning same time as he does.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I know I'm probably doing it wrong so hence why I'm asking for your routines.

Sorry about the long post XX
 
right....
the tv....i was also guilty of this...i like to have constant 'noise',lol.....yes it is better to turn it off and only have it on for certain periods of time.when its on all the time they dont concentrate on that-or indeed anything else properly.

the nap....at 26 months old i would say that the nap is far too late in the afternoon and for too long as especially as you cant get him to bed until 11 i would certainly try cutting it out. if it doesnt work cutting it out you can always try reintroducing a shorter one.

what about going out for walks ,park etc?? mine used to love this and it definately used to make them more tired!

the bath...nope unless he is dirty and needs one you dont have to do this every night.

tv in bed...either stop it completely or let him have it for a set amount of time like 15/20 minutes and thats all....stick to your guns and dont give in!! once you start giving in you will to other things-kids are clever and know how to play this one!

housework/amount of playing...you are never going to be able to schedule this!! it will vary from day to day....sometimes mine play by themselves all day and i do virtually nothing with them,other days its reverse and i do virtually nothing and play with them! just go with the flow and see how it pans out...if you try and schedule it you and your kids will both become bored by it,feel you 'have' too rather than want too...it wont be fun.
 
sounds ok to me, but then I'm not a parent..

7-8 hours sleep a night and an afternoon nap of 1.5 hours or more is plenty of sleep surely?
try not having the afternoon nap and he'll be tired at bed time..
It probably doesn't help that H is on shifts so he sees Daddy sleeping at strange hours but that's nothing you can control really..
the telly won't help since it's stimulation.. try something educational and boring.. :)
a bath each night will relax him and if you use the right scented oils etc, then it will also calm him...
being firm and not hovering is the best way to get them to bed according to "supernanny" .. put them to bed then leave the room, if they get up, put them back to bed with a firm ( but not harsh ) "It's bedtime now.." etc..
second get up is a bit firmer and more final in the voice, any further get ups is silence and just put them back to bed.. don't give them the attention that they are after at that point..
 
Thanks Luverick - yes we do go for walks to the park. He also goes to his grandparents Mon & Thurs & his Grandad likes routine so when he's there he only gets the tv on when he's waiting on his lunch & he also takes him out to the park or in the garden (we don't have a garden). He's as good as gold when he's with his grandad as he knows he can't play him lol XX
 
Hiya.

I was a stay at home mum until the begining of January, had to go back to work then. My son is now 3. I am also a qualified nanny of 20 years.

Your morning routine when the kids wake up sounds ok to me, exactly what I was doing. Have to say a 1 1/2hour nap at 2.30 in the afternoon is way too much if you want him in bed between 7-8. what time do you put him down for a nap? My son wasnt great at napping in the day time, prefered to nap about 2.30/3pm. I used to put him down at 12.30/1. In the end I put him to bed for 1.5hrs and if he slept great if not I would just get him back up. May be a bit grumpy in the afternoon but will be ready for bed a lot earlier in the evening. I definitely wouldnt let him sleep any later than 2.30.

Are you able to to get out to the park, feed the ducks, go for a walk softplay centre in the mornings? Something to burn off some energy and maybe make him ready for a lunchtime nap? Could also be that he just doesn't need a nap anymore. Some kids will give up day time naps at a very young age.

Do you play with him all day? I would encourage him to play by himself for short periods every day. Start of saying" mummy will have a cup of tea while you play with your cars/bricks/books" or whatever. Let him play at your feet if he needs to but don't join in. You will be able to extend the time he can play fairly rapidly (it's amazing how long it takes me to "just drink a cup of tea" lol.)

With 2 small kids you need to be putting your feet up in the evening not cleaning the house. Do it while your son is around and let him help if he wants. He can have his own damp cloth and dustpan and brush. Kids love doing that sort of thing.

As for the tv at bedtime. It's never too late to stop but it wont be easy. I dont bath my son every night but i keep his bedtime routine the same. It starts with some milk and a cuddle then some stories then into bed with kisses and more cuddles. If he asks he is allowed some books in bed but thats it, no tv, no toys. Remove the tv from his room if you have to.

Turn the tv off through the day. a little bit of tv is fine but dont have it on in the background. Put the radio on or some music to dance to.

It wont be easy to change your sons routine but it will be worth it and your daughter will fall into the new routine with you.

Good luck
 
No wonder you are going out of your mind. You must ahe cabin fever BIG time! Mine are older now, but I know that I would rarely have gone a day without getting out and about. The park, swimming, play gym, tumble tots. We ahve a huge country park where we live, and would spend hours walking round that with abby in a sling. Mine were exactly 2 years apart. I remember lookin g after mu Myms dog when they were 4 months and 2 and 4 months, in November, and we went and walked for hours before coming abck and sitting by the fire with some jigsaws. Maybew it's just me, but I could not sit in all day, and H would not ahve been tired at the end of a dy doing little. Are you able to take them swimming. One sure fire way to knacker a baby and a toddler for an hours peace. I did that 2 or 3 times a week. Mine like helping me fly a kite a that age. Mine were in bed by 6 or 7pm at that age, though was up around 6am with them. My eldest had naps up until a few months before starting school. She did start play group at 2 and 10 months. The little one didn't ahve a nap after aboput 18 months. Just 2 differnet children. Little one has always been happier to go to bed earlier, but non-stop all day. She was al;so walking at under 10 months and was just on the go all day every day. We are all different, and choose to have different routines, but the 1st thing that struck me from that routine is that you don't spend some part of every day, jsut getting some fresh air. Just walking to the shops for a paper may help.
 
Hi guys, I didn't say but I do take him out to the park or just out to the shops but not every day. I live in a flat 2 floors up so getting them both down the stairs is a pain. Although he does walk down so i carry the baby half way down, then get him down etc.

I've been guilty of not taking him swimming but this is something we are going to start next week as I've looked into the mother/toddler groups.

I don't sit & play with him all day he usually does his own thing but I'll sometimes sit down & draw with him or build blocks etc

He's very clever as can count to 14, knows all his colours, knows the names of all the animals & the noises the make & all the names of fruit/veg.

I'm not worried about his development just want to try & sort out a better routine before it's too late.

I'm really grateful for all your input & I'm definitely going to change the way we do things. I'm going to see if we can do without the afternoon nap & see how it goes. I think if we do a few weeks he'll fall into the routine.
 
Yeah I reckon. I wonder if a really active morning, fresh air, running around, or swimming, then an hour nap at lunch, then bed for around 7. Then Mum puts feet up, with a cup of hot chocolate and a kit kat while watching the soaps, before a hot bubble bath and bed sounds good. You may feel you feel less resentful to hubbie's lack of action if you get some 'me' time too. we are all differnet though. I found I never planned any routine. Some of the people I knew with kids the same age used to go on and on about routine. One day I felt so awful that we ahd none, that I decided that we would. Of course when I worked it out, we did really. Just enver really planned it. I was never one for makinmg sure mine were home for their routine nap. they would sleep in push chair if need be
 
My daughter is 2 and 10 months. She doesnt have a nap during the say anymore and in general she sleeps at night from about 6:30 till 7:30.
Yesterday she fell asleep in the car on the way back from swimming and slept for around an hour and a half. Then last night she stayed in her bed but she didn't fall asleep untill after 11:00.
I'd suggest it's the nap that's the problem!
 
Hiya, I've got a 22month old and this is her routine regardless if she is at her childminder or when I'm off

She is up at 7.30 - 8am and we get up and out of bed.

Between 8.30 to 9am, we have breakfast and watch milkshake.

Between 9am to 3pm, we are playing, doing shopping, housework or she's at childminder.

Abt 3ish she has a nap if I'm lucky otherwise we play or she plays on her own.

Between 5pm - 6pm I cook dinner and we have our meal.

About 6.30pm its her bedtime, so clean teeth, pj and read a story. We count the stairs to bed and she is in bed no later than 6.45pm

Sometimes she goes straight to sleep, other times she is in her bed talking/singing to her toys. She stays in bed till morning.

Hubby and I did have to go controlled crying for 3 days to get her settled into her bedtime routine, now there is no fuss.

You just have to do what is best for you and your family. Personally I couldn't have my daughter up past 7pm as she is a very busy person and we all need our rest x
 
2 year olds generally need about 10-13 hours sleep a day. My daughter used to be up about 7am but would nap for an hour at midday, awake by 1pm and in bed for 6.45pm.

Definitely take the tele out of his room, there may be a few tears but within a few days he'll have forgotten about it. The bed should be a place for sleep and relaxation, not watching television or playing with toys. It could be he's associating bedtime with watching tv and not sleeping.

It could also be that the desire to be up with you and Dad could be overriding the need to sleep. Some kids hate to be put to bed whilst adults are still up as they feel they may be missing something.
 
And in another 12 years you'll have to dig him out of bed for lunch at the weekends :p
 
I've got a 5 year old and (just) 2 year old. We do:

7am - up for school
7.30-8 - breakfast
8.45 - take daughter to school
9am - time with 2 year old starts! At this time we either go to music class, toddler group (twice a week) or shopping, visiting friends, soft play etc but something active
11.45 - get home for lunch
12-1 - lunch
1-2.30 - nap
3.00 - school run
3.45 - play at home (usually)
5.30 - tea
6.30 - play
7.00 - bath, story, bed
8pm - freedom!

In your case I would suggest the nap needs to stop if he's not going to bed til so late.
HTH x
 
I agree with taking the TV out of his room. Why does a 2 year old need a TV in his room? I don't have one and I'm 28!! :D
 
Agree with an earlier tea time too. My nephew is 20 months old and has his tea around 4-4.30pm and he's in bed by 6-6.30pm.
 
Well guys thanks so much for all your replies.

I did the following different today:

He had a nap from 12.30-2pm, I woke him up

I had his dinner at 5.30pm

He played mostly on his own except when he was helping me tidy up (took us twice as long lol) I told him what was going to happen, dinner, then play, bath & done his teeth I then sat & read with him for 20 minutes.

I made him warm milk to drink & put him in bed at 7.30pm with a little light on & no TV. He kept calling Mammy, Mammy & I ignored him, he was asleep by 8pm.

Thanks so much, I know it's only 1 day but I'm feeling better already XX
 
big bear said:
Well guys thanks so much for all your replies.

I did the following different today:

He had a nap from 12.30-2pm, I woke him up

I had his dinner at 5.30pm

He played mostly on his own except when he was helping me tidy up (took us twice as long lol) I told him what was going to happen, dinner, then play, bath & done his teeth I then sat & read with him for 20 minutes.

I made him warm milk to drink & put him in bed at 7.30pm with a little light on & no TV. He kept calling Mammy, Mammy & I ignored him, he was asleep by 8pm.

Thanks so much, I know it's only 1 day but I'm feeling better already XX
Click to expand...

Hiya well done for being so strong. It's so hard when they call out. Hubby was prepared to 'give in' before me but I said that we need to stick to our guns and we hardly ever have problems putting our girl down. Only time is when she is out of her 'normal' routine and it takes a few days to get back into the swing of things
 
Have you watched Supernanny? The stay in bed techinique she does is supposed to be good.
 
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