Who are you dieting for?

Last time I lost weight I was doing it for my bf at the time - he had a history of cheating on me and I was convinced it was because I wasn't slim. But lo and behold when I lost my weight and felt great it emerged he had been cheating on me again...

So! He's not part of my life anymore. I ate myself fat, again. And now I am 100% doing this for myself.

I am sick of looking in the mirror and feeling so disgusted. I am sick of seeing photos of me on a night out and thinking 'oh my god!' aaaand, I am sick of not being able to buy the clothes I want or feel good in any of the clothes I own!

My current boyfriend seems to genuinely like my body the way it is though..so now part of me is worried he'll go off me if I slim down. But he supports me nonethless.
 
I'm the largest in group of friends at uni and I'm sick of having to double check myself when dressing up to go out.
I suppose then I'm dieting to get my own self esteem back and to feel like I'm completely control with something in my life, perhaps to feel as if I can actually do something properly and right.

I also have a slightly spiteful reason for losing weight, I broke up with a boyfriend of nearly 3 years in September, recently he's got with another girl probably about a size smaller than me and I want to show him exactly what he can't have.

Also I was having a bit of a thing with a guy from uni who will be my sole flatmate in September, being an emotionally complicated guy himself he suddenly cut me out and in his own way he likes to taunt me about my weight. When I go back, I want to walk past him on the way to the shower in my nice black lingerie with a nicely slim body, and just see the look on his face.
 
im doing it because i want to join the football team my mates are starting up in september, i can join but i want to be able to play at my best and not let my mates down because i aint as fit as them. ive all ways been the fat funny friend, rather just be the funny lad lol. also once i get to my ideal weight and feel comfortable wouldnt mind meeting a nice girl and settling down and just enjoying life
 
im doing it because i want to join the football team my mates are starting up in september, i can join but i want to be able to play at my best and not let my mates down because i aint as fit as them. ive all ways been the fat funny friend, rather just be the funny lad lol. also once i get to my ideal weight and feel comfortable wouldnt mind meeting a nice girl and settling down and just enjoying life


So in many ways your doing it to be more accepted by your peers football team. Also for yourself to feel good. If the residual is you meet a nice wee girly then great. I wish you the very best of luck.

None of what you've said is a bad thing hon.

:hug99:

You've got a great attitude, long may it continue.
 
doing it for me myself and i
 
I just want to go into a shop, buy something that looks good on me instead of coming out nearly crying because nothing fits. I want to wear ordinary trousers instead of thick jeans because the fat lumps of my legs showed through thinner material. And I want some nice undies instead of waist high knickers. Plus I want to look nice and go out with my OH instead of hiding away feeling embarrassed.
But I am doing it for myself.
 
I want to do this for me, so i can look in the mirror and think i could just wear a bikini without packing shorts. Also, a compliment or two off of my other half wouldn't go a miss :(
 
Oh see...KD...I'm quite confused.

The times I've done this before, it has been cause I want to look good for everyone else and for me to think I look good.

This time.. I desperately don't want anyone to notice or comment.....surely I was this skinny all along? can it really be that much of a difference?

I do know that I treat myself better when skinny, I take more care of my appearance, I dress differently. It's horrid to think that I care about myself more when I'm skinny. Like I somehow evaluate myself as "better"??
 
Oh see...KD...I'm quite confused.

Me too :D

The times I've done this before, it has been cause I want to look good for everyone else and for me to think I look good.
So you want to look good for appraisal from others, not necessarily verbally though.

Of course, we all want to look good. That's fair enough. But it's not enough to motivate us to keep the weight off forever.

Okay, you may keep the weight off for a while, but you can stay slim, and keep a bad relationship with food. Yoyoing will keep the weight off to a certain extent. That way you will stay looking 'good'. But it's not mentally healthy and does the head in after a while.

And then..of course..there will be periods when you don't care. Before you know it, the weight is back on...sigh.

So, lose weight and look good, but put it further down the list of priorities.

It's not a strong enough foundation to last for long.
It's horrid to think that I care about myself more when I'm skinny. Like I somehow evaluate myself as "better"??
We're brainwashed by our society to think that way. I'll come back to this later :)
 
This time it is for me, I decided that before i started - as this is a continuation of losing 5 stone on CD and putting a stone back on when i met my OH, but if at the size i want to be a got a smile or wink from a handsome man on the street i would be quietly pleased.
 
To be perfectly honest, I'd say there's like 1% influence from everyone else, and 99% I'm doing this for myself. I don't want to look in the mirror and think 'Omg, i'm enormously big' nor do I want to have to go to the larger sized sections of stores [such as in new look]. I want to be able to feel good in my body and wear clothes that I like. I also don't want to get health issues such as breast cancer and all sorts of cancer, and I want to be fit. So there's loads of reasons and I'm mainly doing it for myself. I just want to be healthy.
 
I, like so many others, have done the dieting for others. Then the relationship, be it romantic or friendship, or otherwise, has fallen apart for whatever reason, and I hit the choccie biscuits and put it allll back on again.

This time, it is for real. It is for me, it is for my health. Before I never noticed, but recently, I have started to feel unhealthy... Out of breath on the stairs, etc etc. I don't want to be judged for being fat, because I know I deserve better than that, and so I am doing this for ME.

x
 
Loads of reasons but this is the main one: I split up with my ex over a year ago now and I just chucked on the pounds. I'm now 18 and all my mates are getting girlfriends or pulling girls in clubs and I can't even get a snog, let alone anything else! I would love a girlfriend again to spend those special times with that I miss so much :( so my main reason is I'm doing it for myself.

Another thing that made me really realise I had a problem was a few weeks ago I went to Thorpe Park and I couldn't fit in one of the seats proper, I had to change with a mate. How embarrassing.

I take the piss out of myself for being fat with the lads but in secret I hate it, I'm just trying to put a brave face on it. I can't stand it when someone calls me fat.

Another reason is that the men in my family have a history of heart/blood pressure problems. My grandad died when he was 42 because of a heart attack, my dad now takes tablets that are basically keeping him alive because of his blood pressure and I know my weight won't help if I get a problem when I'm older.
 
i've been in the same situation, theme park wise. Mine was Alton Towers, I understand the feeling.
Just think next time u go, with the right focus, you'll be wowing them all :D
 
i keep thinking that i dont want my babies to grow up without a mum and for my dh to be proud to show me off.

both are the wrong reason because WHAT ABOUT ME?!!! maybe thats where im going wrong!
 
for my son ;) so he doesnt suffer the same things I did as a kid "ooh look at your mum aint she huge" :mad:
 
Honestly.. I am dieting for 3 people/things..

Myself..
My boyfriend
&
my modelling.

I have suffered with depression for 6 years down to bullying which made me extremely unconfident, since then I have been down about everything about me pretty much.. :(
My confidence issues are putting a HUGE strain on my relationship, we have been together 5 years in January 2010 but 1 day I think he is just going to give up as I cause horrible arguments through jelousy of other girls.. :(
I have been modelling for 3 years.. :D I love it but want to branch out to commercial and magazine work, & for castings I do not want to be classed as a plus size model (even though I am only a size 12 now!)
 
Honestly.. I am dieting for 3 people/things..

Myself..
My boyfriend
&
my modelling.

I have suffered with depression for 6 years down to bullying which made me extremely unconfident, since then I have been down about everything about me pretty much.. :(
My confidence issues are putting a HUGE strain on my relationship, we have been together 5 years in January 2010 but 1 day I think he is just going to give up as I cause horrible arguments through jelousy of other girls.. :(
I have been modelling for 3 years.. :D I love it but want to branch out to commercial and magazine work, & for castings I do not want to be classed as a plus size model (even though I am only a size 12 now!)

Plus!!!! When I loose my 3 stone I'l be getting a boob job as a gift from my fella to say well done.. YAY :D
 
I'm doing it for me first, then my son (like a PP said, I don't want him to have the fattest mummy in school! Also want to take him swimming without feeling mortified) then in a way I'm doing it so that I don't have that fear that I have to be the quiet fat girl, in case someone mocks me for my weight!
 
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