niccy.ulverston
Member
This is my first diary entry but far from my first day dieting. I've had issues with my weight since I was 12. I remember wearing football type shorts, my "boyfriend" at the time jokingly tugged at them, sniggered and said something along the lines of 'fat legs'. Pointless immaturity, but it hurt, and it stuck.
I've been through phases of purposely not eating, binge eating, attempting (mostly failing) to induce sickness, this diet, that diet, crazy fad diet. Then I fell pregnant and was never full. I ballooned. My self confidence was shot after a certain dispute with my partner, and I've not been able to puck myself up since. Our little one is 2, and I'm still battling the bulge, the wobbly mummy tummy, trunks for legs, many chins... could go on.
My relationship is suffering due to my body hang ups. I cringe when I'm touched, as rather than enjoying intimacy im thinking how disgusting I am. I know its a mindset, I'm aware of that, but short of labotomy nothing will change that easily.
Basically down in the dumps, losing motivation, and very very alone in my world of problems.
So here I go, Day...well, I guess it'd be day 4382(ish) from the say ut began- but for arguments sake, let's call it day 1.
10st 6lbs, 5'4.
In it to lose it.
I've been through phases of purposely not eating, binge eating, attempting (mostly failing) to induce sickness, this diet, that diet, crazy fad diet. Then I fell pregnant and was never full. I ballooned. My self confidence was shot after a certain dispute with my partner, and I've not been able to puck myself up since. Our little one is 2, and I'm still battling the bulge, the wobbly mummy tummy, trunks for legs, many chins... could go on.
My relationship is suffering due to my body hang ups. I cringe when I'm touched, as rather than enjoying intimacy im thinking how disgusting I am. I know its a mindset, I'm aware of that, but short of labotomy nothing will change that easily.
Basically down in the dumps, losing motivation, and very very alone in my world of problems.
So here I go, Day...well, I guess it'd be day 4382(ish) from the say ut began- but for arguments sake, let's call it day 1.
10st 6lbs, 5'4.
In it to lose it.