How can I when I look back at my own dieting attempts? Hopeless. That’s why this time I had to find a way to last me for the rest of my life. A plan that I could do whether I was happy or sad. All the analyzing wasn’t because I had a few months spare
I just had to get it right some time.
I think the key is in what you have said all along, being healthy.
I think goals are different according to what plan you have in mind. If you are doing a set dieting plan, then yes, the numbers on the scales are important. If you are trying to do healthy sensible eating, then you have to have a different mindset IMO.
This isn’t a ‘diet’ that you are going to go on and off, this is a new Barb who is looking after herself, giving herself everything she deserves. She wont suddenly not deserve it when the scales show a loss or a gain. She doesn’t suddenly deserve it when she gets to goal. She deserves it now. The weight will take care of itself.
The thing about the scales is that it gives you a bit of an idea of how the weight thing is going. It’s not to do with whether you’ve succeeded or not in eating healthily.
After all, the scales don’t register how healthily you are or are not eating. They will go down though ….but it takes time. Looking at the scales like a mark book doesn’t work.
So forget about the scales for a moment. This is your life and how you have chosen to live it. I’m sure you know about healthy eating. You know what is likely to make you gain and what isn’t. You know that ultimately you want to lose weight and you’ll struggle to do that if you have too many off days.
You need to find a way that you can manage these nights out without eating too much. Not depriving yourself, but taking a whole new look at it.
You want wine? You can have wine! One drink…maybe two…because that is all you need. You’ll look forward to it. You may cut down a little on your food because you want to be a bit hungrier so that you can enjoy your meal out.
It’s not because you have to lose x pounds by Wednesday, but because you are looking after yourself. You are a lady in control
J
. I already, automatically, never have more than one biscuit, thats a permanent change that I'm not letting go of.
:clap: See. Little changes. Gradually make more. Does it feel so terrible to have one? You’ll find it becomes so natural that you can’t imagine how you ate more in one sitting. It takes time though.
well to start with I was very mindful of eating healthily, but gradually I slipped back into old habits. Not terrible ones to be fair but I was on a slippery slope.
And you did well to notice before it was too late, but you know more now. You know how bad habits can return.
I just think that a lot of your advice I 'block out',
That’s fair enough. I have bombarded you somewhat. You have to look at each thing when you are ready and adapt it for you. If you don’t agree with anything at this stage, that’s fair enough too. I’m only saying about my answers. They might not be yours. Perhaps you could just keep them in the back of your mind and when something crops up, you might give them another think through.
especially the focus on health not weight bit. I am far too interested in the scales and not enough in how well I am.
I really do understand that. It’s fine though if you can just keep going on with your plan and not let the scales change anything in a negative way.
It does seem to affect you though. What the scales say determines how you will live the next week.
Last night DH was talking such sense and I thought yes thats the answer, no more extremes,
Clever DH again
You don’t get a light at the end of your tunnel. You get a full force comet zooming through the air towards you, lighting the whole of Barb Land, then it burns itself out.
just good food and lots of exercise and no self beatings when nights out are too good. For a little while I felt better, I could feel the pressure lifting, today I just want to beat myself up for being such a quitter.
But you’re not a quitter. You haven’t quit anything. You are learning to look after yourself. There is no start and end. Each moment is new chance to look after Barb now. As for the nights out, yep they are good, and certainly no need to beat yourself up over them, but they are regular occurrences and I think it would do well to learn how to enjoy without going overboard. Not saying you are going overboard…just not switching off into ‘don’t care’ or 'I'll make up for it tomorrow mode. Just finding ways of tackling things without feeling deprived, and staying relaxed… getting ideas along the way that will make this not only enjoyable, but also sustainable in the long term.
There ya go. You were due an epic weren’t you.
Please print out and read over a glass of red wine
Just the one mind you
or alternatively 
