Hi Borntofly
I thought you might find this helpful.. I posted it before xmas. Breaking the binge cycle and learning how to recognise what I am feeling, why, and actually deal with those feelings rather than swallow them has been one of the hardest but also the most rewarding parts of this journey for me. You have to try and give yourself a moment to pause when you feel that desire to food to question yourself about what is really going on. Start writing.. you may still binge anyway but over a period of weeks you will be able to look back on your writing and see how you are getting better and better at learning to deal with your feelings rather than eating them to silence them.
(from an e-newsletter I get).
Never binging again is possible but the biggest mistake that people who binge make is saying to themselves, "I'll never binge again!" Yet, we all do it. The food is finished and then we promise ourselves that it will never happen again. Even though almost everyone that binges says that to themselves, it sets you up for self-hatred, guilt and failure. You see, no one that ends a pattern of binging does it cold turkey. You don't decide to stop and then never binge again. It's just not how ending a pattern of binging works. That's because the binge serves a very important purpose. It makes you feel better emotionally. So, if you're committed to never binging again what are the signs along the way the signify that you're succeeding:
*More time between binges (even something small for example, I used to binge every other day and now only do it every third day)
*Shorter binges (My binges used to last two days, now they only last an hour)
*Binges on smaller amounts of food (I used to eat a gallon of ice-cream, now I eat half a pint)
*The ability to stop a binge in the middle (I used to not even realize I was having a binge till it was over, now I can stop myself in the middle)
*Forgiving yourself more quickly after a binge ends (I don't talk to myself in a mean way when I binge, I have compassion for myself)
*Bouncing back more quickly when a binge happens (in other words recommitting to understanding and stopping your binge pattern)
*Understanding what feelings set off the binge (I was able to see that I had the binge after I had a fight with my boss)
*The ability to see a binge coming (even if you can't stop it yet)
Being able to acknowledge the small successes along the way is a really important step on the road to recovery. It can be all too easy to see how far you still need to go and forget how far you've already come. Ending a binge pattern is hard work but you can do it. One day you might not binge at all but it won't happen by making a declaration, it will happen by being loving to yourself and staying aware. So, don't say, "I'll never binge again." Instead, take it one gentle step at a time. Remember, you're looking for progress, not perfection.
